Seeking advice from the Butches...Please...

[CausticPrincess]

LOVE this site...I am having fun reading and dreaming.......This Femme is yearning for her STUD......ButchDaddy....SweetBoi........ There is a large community here where I live, but havent any idea how to find my butch!! Its almost like they are all in hiding!! ...asking a word of advice from the butches out there......

I cut hair in the local Mall.....How do I make a first move if I see a sweet Butch strolling the mall or in my chair...is that uncouth..? Should I just zip it and let her find me...?? Give her direct eye contact...??? HELP!!

Happy Sunday everyone!!!

[Invictus]

First, welcome to the site.

As to your question, eye contact and a great smile usually seems to work.

[skeeter_01]

welcome!! :)
if you were trying to get MY attention, eye contact and a smile are a GREAT ice breaker but....make me laugh and you've got me! :)
skeet

[JAGG]

Well if you have a large community where you live it shouldn't be a problem. You stated you work at a mall, lots of foot traffic. If I were you , when I didn't have a customer, I'd stand outside the salon and when a butch walked by,I'd say " hey do you need a hair cut?" If they turn you down, say "I'm pretty amazing wanna see? " That will make them laugh, but also make them think. So you plant some seeds and wait.
I have other tried and true methods, but I can't reveal them out in the open like this, I'd lose my membership to the HBSUC.

[CausticPrincess]

JAGG..LOVE it!! I will DEF try that one......

when I have gone to the local club,(Once).. the place is packed and OMG the butches were INCREDIBLE.....but I cant seem to come across them out in the GP....weird.......what is that!.......

COME OUT COME OUT WHERE EVER YOU ARE........

[theoddz]

Heh...tell you what, if a Lady approached me with this, I'd be instantly hooked. How could any Butch/FTM/boi/guy resist being approached like this?? ;)

Theo :bouquet:

Well if you have a large community where you live it shouldn't be a problem. You stated you work at a mall, lots of foot traffic. If I were you , when I didn't have a customer, I'd stand outside the salon and when a butch walked by,I'd say " hey do you need a hair cut?" If they turn you down, say "I'm pretty amazing wanna see? " That will make them laugh, but also make them think. So you plant some seeds and wait.
I have other tried and true methods, but I can't reveal them out in the open like this, I'd lose my membership to the HBSUC.

[stonebutchinpa]

Well if you have a large community where you live it shouldn't be a problem. You stated you work at a mall, lots of foot traffic. If I were you , when I didn't have a customer, I'd stand outside the salon and when a butch walked by,I'd say " hey do you need a hair cut?" If they turn you down, say "I'm pretty amazing wanna see? " That will make them laugh, but also make them think. So you plant some seeds and wait.
I have other tried and true methods, but I can't reveal them out in the open like this, I'd lose my membership to the HBSUC.


Great advice! I'd be hooked with this type of flirting too. From my experience it is hard to spot the femme woman, so a look or a smile helps.

[CausticPrincess]

That is my mission for the week.....LOL....when I see what I like.....direct eye contact.....sweet sassy smile.....and offer to run my hands through her hair......WINNER!!!!

:cheer:

[stonebutchinpa]

JAGG..LOVE it!! I will DEF try that one......

when I have gone to the local club,(Once).. the place is packed and OMG the butches were INCREDIBLE.....but I cant seem to come across them out in the GP....weird.......what is that!.......

COME OUT COME OUT WHERE EVER YOU ARE........


Darlin' maybe the butch you are looking for doesn't live in FL :flowers: perhaps they live in another state.......say like Pennsylvania lol :tease: just sayin'

[CausticPrincess]

LMAO!!! you have a most excellent point Stone!!!! And......are we really hard to spot for some reason...?? SHIT !! I practically drool when I see what I like.... I thought I was obvious.......OBVIOUSLY NOT!! Come back to FLA darling......lemme run my fingers through your hair......LOL

[stonebutchinpa]

LMAO!!! you have a most excellent point Stone!!!! And......are we really hard to spot for some reason...?? SHIT !! I practically drool when I see what I like.... I thought I was obvious.......OBVIOUSLY NOT!! Come back to FLA darling......lemme run my fingers through your hair......LOL

LOL well up here the ladies are hard to spot. I'd love for you to run your fingers through my hair

[Tcountry]

yes ma'am for sure do something to grab their attention...good butches are easy to spot in the GP but a good femme is hard Not to mistake for a straight lady...lay it on thick & you'll turn the right head... ;)

[morningstar55]

very good advice's ...... for Princess here.....
but i have a ?
what if your not the Princess type..... are there any butch/guys.TG.. etc. who would like a non princess type??

[The_Lady_Snow]

Is work the right place?

Isn't there some other social network?

[Jet]

Heh...tell you what, if a Lady approached me with this, I'd be instantly hooked. How could any Butch/FTM/boi/guy resist being approached like this?? ;)

Theo :bouquet:

ditto....I'd be flattered.

[MysticOceansFL]

LOVE this site...I am having fun reading and dreaming.......This Femme is yearning for her STUD......ButchDaddy....SweetBoi........ There is a large community here where I live, but havent any idea how to find my butch!! Its almost like they are all in hiding!! ...asking a word of advice from the butches out there......

I cut hair in the local Mall.....How do I make a first move if I see a sweet Butch strolling the mall or in my chair...is that uncouth..? Should I just zip it and let her find me...?? Give her direct eye contact...??? HELP!!

Happy Sunday everyone!!!



Dear CausticPrincess,
I'm sure your beautiful smile and great personality would attract any butch rather its a FTM or someone who identifies as a TopButch, just keep your options open on all levels

[sweetbutch26]

i agree with stone. femmes are hard to spot. unless i'm hanging upside down from a tree and pounding my chest to see which ones run over to me i don't approach femmes in a public/straight forum. tried it once and got hit with a purse. which hurt like hell. which leads me to ask wtf do you femmes keep in those things? >_<

[princessbelle]

i agree with stone. femmes are hard to spot. unless i'm hanging upside down from a tree and pounding my chest to see which ones run over to me i don't approach femmes in a public/straight forum. tried it once and got hit with a purse. which hurt like hell. which leads me to ask wtf do you femmes keep in those things? >_<

OMG do you seriously think we should tell you? Wouldn't that spoil the suspense? Should this have gone in the "answer a question with a question" annoying thread?

[sweetbutch26]

GAH that just made me wonder more. i think you should have a weapons permit to carry a purse.

[Blade]

I seriously doubt a femme would hit one of us with her purse, we need to know what femmes keep in them cuz we would suspect straight women keep the same things in them. So umm like we know what we are up against when it hits our head.

OMG do you seriously think we should tell you? Wouldn't that spoil the suspense? Should this have gone in the "answer a question with a question" annoying thread?

[princessbelle]

Maybe some of us do *smiles sweetly

[sweetbutch26]

yea what he said

[princessbelle]

I seriously doubt a femme would hit one of us with her purse, we need to know what femmes keep in them cuz we would suspect straight women keep the same things in them. So umm like we know what we are up against when it hits our head.

You don't need to know. It won't hurt any less....just embrace the moment

[The_Lady_Snow]

i agree with stone. femmes are hard to spot. unless i'm hanging upside down from a tree and pounding my chest to see which ones run over to me i don't approach femmes in a public/straight forum. tried it once and got hit with a purse. which hurt like hell. which leads me to ask wtf do you femmes keep in those things? >_<

I have a question to ask.

Do you really hang upside down from trees and pound your chest?

I'm a femme, with some age and I have to say I have never

EVER experienced this when dating or trying to get a date from a butch.

Is this how you see femme's?

I won't even go into the whole purse thing.

I have to all this oogey stuff being said about how femme's are or are being perceived to be is

rude and oogey.

[Mister Bent]

I have a question to ask.

Do you really hang upside down from trees and pound your chest?

I'm a femme, with some age and I have to say I have never

EVER experienced this when dating or trying to get a date from a butch.

Is this how you see femme's?

I won't even go into the whole purse thing.

I have to all this oogey stuff being said about how femme's are or are being perceived to be is

rude and oogey.


I've been really struggling with how this thread seems to be all about perpetuating tired, and not so true, stereotypes.

I'm really sort of all about evolution.

[sweetbutch26]

I have a question to ask.

Do you really hang upside down from trees and pound your chest?

I'm a femme, with some age and I have to say I have never

EVER experienced this when dating or trying to get a date from a butch.

Is this how you see femme's?

I won't even go into the whole purse thing.

I have to all this oogey stuff being said about how femme's are or are being perceived to be is

rude and oogey.

I was joking. and what i was telling caustic is that sometimes femmes and straight ladies are hard to separate. so it would be easier for her to approach a butch so they know where she stands. and yes i mistook a straight lady for a femme once and got hit with a purse

[The_Lady_Snow]

I was joking. and what i was telling caustic is that sometimes femmes and straight ladies are hard to separate. so it would be easier for her to approach a butch so they know where she stands. and yes i mistook a straight lady for a femme once and got hit with a purse


*s*

straight women and femme's are two different animals.

and thank you for explaining.

I will be honest the stereotypes being thrown are offensive to me as a *femme*

I thank you for the dialogue.:rrose:

[Julie]

i agree with stone. femmes are hard to spot. unless i'm hanging upside down from a tree and pounding my chest to see which ones run over to me i don't approach femmes in a public/straight forum. tried it once and got hit with a purse. which hurt like hell. which leads me to ask wtf do you femmes keep in those things? >_<

I carry in my purse... An autographed copy of Jack Nicholson's book - "I am really not a Misogynistic Pig."

As well as... Stereotypical Butch Repellent

[betenoire]

In my purse I carry whatever I happen to be reading at the moment, my new Nintendo DSi (woo!), a black magic marker, and my cigarettes.

I do not carry a lighter. Instead I just stand around holding my cigarette to my lips and looking helpless until some drooling masculine type rushes up to light it for me.

:blueheels:

[KimKawashima]

LOVE this site...I am having fun reading and dreaming.......This Femme is yearning for her STUD......ButchDaddy....SweetBoi........ There is a large community here where I live, but havent any idea how to find my butch!! Its almost like they are all in hiding!! ...asking a word of advice from the butches out there......

I cut hair in the local Mall.....How do I make a first move if I see a sweet Butch strolling the mall or in my chair...is that uncouth..? Should I just zip it and let her find me...?? Give her direct eye contact...??? HELP!!

Happy Sunday everyone!!!

I would say eye contact and a smile is good. At work it may not necessarily register to the Butch, some of us are oblivious. I agree that since we are more obvious, then it is easier for the Femme to approach. However if the Butch has some spirit then asking is an option. As a Boi I have asked a woman if she was seeing someone, pretty safe question. Or the, "I would like to take you to coffee." That is usually a safe neutral.

[Mister Bent]

I do not carry a lighter. Instead I just stand around holding my cigarette to my lips and looking helpless until some drooling masculine type rushes up to light it for me.

:blueheels:


Hey *darlin'* let me get that for you.

[betenoire]

Hey *darlin'* let me get that for you.


Oh swoony swoon swoon!

I forgot to mention that I also have no money in my purse and I expect you to pay for stuff. 'kay? 'Kay!

[Rope]

melikes when Snow uses the word oogey. <g>

Your name is caustic princess? hmmm, that might explain the lack of attention right there. caustic and princess, wow. I am not putting anyone down for the name they find to use online but the word caustic doesn't exactly make one think, hmmm, easy going femme, I want to meet her. Or of course this could just be me.

C'mon now butches we all know that 75% of us are guilty of needing to be hit over the head with a two by four (not a purse, that would be too subtle) to give us the message a femme is interested or even looking at us. Nice smile be damned---come at me with at least a "hello" and a smile or I do just assume you're not smiling at me, you're possibly a straight woman, ETC.

Rope--

[Queerasfck]

In my purse I carry whatever I happen to be reading at the moment, my new Nintendo DSi (woo!), a black magic marker, and my cigarettes.

I do not carry a lighter. Instead I just stand around holding my cigarette to my lips and looking helpless until some drooling masculine type rushes up to light it for me.

:blueheels:

Black magic marker??? What are you a tagger?

[betenoire]

Black magic marker??? What are you a tagger?

No. It's just sometimes I come across things that need to be edited.

[sweetbutch26]

obviously what i said was misinterpreted. i certainly didn't mean to offend anyone, especially the lovely ladies. while i am old school and believe in opening doors and pulling out chairs i don't perceive femmes in a certain light because each person (be it femme or butch) is a unique individual.

[Queerasfck]

LOVE this site...I am having fun reading and dreaming.......This Femme is yearning for her STUD......ButchDaddy....SweetBoi........ There is a large community here where I live, but havent any idea how to find my butch!! Its almost like they are all in hiding!! ...asking a word of advice from the butches out there......

I cut hair in the local Mall.....How do I make a first move if I see a sweet Butch strolling the mall or in my chair...is that uncouth..? Should I just zip it and let her find me...?? Give her direct eye contact...??? HELP!!

Happy Sunday everyone!!!

Well, if you are interested in chatting with butches then posting a lot here is a good way to do it. Also, you could post a picture in the gallery of yourself. To make it more inviting you could pose with your dog or cat, this will make butches more likely to comment on your picture and start conversations with you. For the sake of everyone involved I would recommend using your real picture.

That should get the ball rolling. Heh.

[morningstar55]

melikes when Snow uses the word oogey. <g>

Your name is caustic princess? hmmm, that might explain the lack of attention right there. caustic and princess, wow. I am not putting anyone down for the name they find to use online but the word caustic doesn't exactly make one think, hmmm, easy going femme, I want to meet her. Or of course this could just be me.

C'mon now butches we all know that 75% of us are guilty of needing to be hit over the head with a two by four (not a purse, that would be too subtle) to give us the message a femme is interested or even looking at us. Nice smile be damned---come at me with at least a "hello" and a smile or I do just assume you're not smiling at me, you're possibly a straight woman, ETC.

Rope--


this makes me go back to my ? on the 1st page......... what about the non princess girls out here?? where do we stand?? with all the guys here??
have any tips for us non princess girls??

[Julie]

On a very serious note... Caustic Princess (a schism in terms).

I am sure your OP was truly innocent and wondering! How do we (who are we?) attract butches?

Without getting into the stereotypical diarrhea of the mouth while standing on my pedestal at Butches R' Us -- And turning my sisters and brothers into a band of paper dolls, as certainly - we all look the same (note sarcasm).

There is NO WAY to attract a BUTCH - There is NO WAY to attract a FEMME. Sorry, but it's kinda like changing a diaper - there is no one way to do it.

Bottom line... It's about self-respect! If you don't respect who you are as a human being, you aren't going to attract anybody. And if you wear that "come hither," look on your person, you might as well wear a big warning sign. Nothing scarier than the in your face pursuit.

I prefer subtle, both in pursuing (the hunt or so that is what this topic feels like) and being pursued.

Julie who perhaps is just getting too fucking old!

[Isadora]

be yourself
smile and be happy
don't give a shit about what others think about how you are and enjoy your life, among many other things, this is what attracts people.

Sometimes strolling through a thread is like walking the gauntlet of the mean girls.

Isadora

[The_Lady_Snow]

this makes me go back to my ? on the 1st page......... what about the non princess girls out here?? where do we stand?? with all the guys here??
have any tips for us non princess girls??


Hi MS!!

I am no princess I assure you. So I stand pretty good, not hard to get someone's attention. It's sometimes as simple as a hello, my name is..



and sometimes it's just about a look and then just wait.

orrrrrrrrrrr sometimes a girl has to do what a girl has to do an just flat out say.

Hi I'm ______ you're cute, I'm cute buy you a cup of coffee?

The worse thing that can happen is they are just not into you.

That's ok though, cause out there someone is.

[KimKawashima]

Really now, no one should be getting offended about anything out here in this realm. We are all posting about our own point of views and answering honestly as we perceive it. Honestly, their are stereotypes of some sort regardless of our individuality. If you can't embrace them and find humor in them and brush them off, perhaps you should crawl under a rock and stop visiting sites where real people have real opinions. I'm a Boi/Butch/Daddie/Master and I look like a Guy and act Masculine. My Femme is a Baby Girl/Femme/Slave. She acts like a Femme, looks like a Femme etc. No one would guess she is a Lesbian. Hence the Names we give ourselves, hence the Stereotypes otherwise their wouldn't be these labels, yes? Smile and be happy and get over it.:readfineprint:

[The_Lady_Snow]

Really now, no one should be getting offended about anything out here in this realm. We are all posting about our own point of views and answering honestly as we perceive it. Honestly, their are stereotypes of some sort regardless of our individuality. If you can't embrace them and find humor in them and brush them off, perhaps you should crawl under a rock and stop visiting sites where real people have real opinions. I'm a Boi/Butch/Daddie/Master and I look like a Guy and act Masculine. My Femme is a Baby Girl/Femme/Slave. She acts like a Femme, looks like a Femme etc. No one would guess she is a Lesbian. Hence the Names we give ourselves, hence the Stereotypes otherwise their wouldn't be these labels, yes? Smile and be happy and get over it.:readfineprint:

*s*

I am ok with calling out stereotypes.

I am not fond of sexism either and ok with calling that out as well.

:)

[Mister Bent]

Really now, no one should be getting offended about anything out here in this realm. We are all posting about our own point of views and answering honestly as we perceive it. Honestly, their are stereotypes of some sort regardless of our individuality. If you can't embrace them and find humor in them and brush them off, perhaps you should crawl under a rock and stop visiting sites where real people have real opinions. I'm a Boi/Butch/Daddie/Master and I look like a Guy and act Masculine. My Femme is a Baby Girl/Femme/Slave. She acts like a Femme, looks like a Femme etc. No one would guess she is a Lesbian. Hence the Names we give ourselves, hence the Stereotypes otherwise their wouldn't be these labels, yes? Smile and be happy and get over it.:readfineprint:

The very notion that the people who spoke of their offense need to get a sense of humor is, in itself, hilarious, and also, a little offensive.

It's not about lacking a sense of humor, it's about not wanting to embrace degrading, old fashioned and absurd stereotypes of the people we are not. Accepting stereotypes isn't something anyone should have to sit comfortably with.

Stereotypes and labels are not the same thing. My "label" does not instantly attribute to me a plethora of behaviors or attributes that speak to who I am. If they do, then someone isn't paying attention.

Again, I suggest evolution, it's a remarkable tool.

[KimKawashima]

*s*

I am ok with calling out stereotypes.

I am not fond of sexism either and ok with calling that out as well.

:)

That wasn't directed at anyone in particular. Just I have seen too much whining about "...don't use stereotypes, I'm offended..." So I was just nipping it in the butt before too much whining occurred. Whiners are one of my pet peeves. This entire site is full of so many different people and lets be honest, some of us can be lumped together under labels, but yes admittedly some of us can not be, we are exceptions to the rules and categories. I love all my brothers and sisters equally and enjoy all of our craziness and differences. Our lives are complicated enough and we don't need whiners and complainers to drag us down. So I was just making a point....If you can't stand the heat get the F out of the kitchen.

[KimKawashima]

The very notion that the people who spoke of their offense need to get a sense of humor is, in itself, hilarious, and also, a little offensive.

It's not about lacking a sense of humor, it's about not wanting to embrace degrading, old fashioned and absurd stereotypes of the people we are not. Accepting stereotypes isn't something anyone should have to sit comfortably with.

Stereotypes and labels are not the same thing. My "label" does not instantly attribute to me a plethora of behaviors or attributes that speak to who I am. If they do, then someone isn't paying attention.

Again, I suggest evolution, it's a remarkable tool.


I suppose you can slap another "label" on a word all you want but the action remains the some. So okay, my evolved word for "stereotype" is "label."

[The_Lady_Snow]

That wasn't directed at anyone in particular. Just I have seen too much whining about "...don't use stereotypes, I'm offended..." So I was just nipping it in the butt before too much whining occurred. Whiners are one of my pet peeves. This entire site is full of so many different people and lets be honest, some of us can be lumped together under labels, but yes admittedly some of us can not be, we are exceptions to the rules and categories. I love all my brothers and sisters equally and enjoy all of our craziness and differences. Our lives are complicated enough and we don't need whiners and complainers to drag us down. So I was just making a point....If you can't stand the heat get the F out of the kitchen.


*s*

Good thing I never have liked the kitchen!!!

I am still ok with calling out stereotypes and pesky lil isms

:)

Thanks for the dialogue

[Mister Bent]

That wasn't directed at anyone in particular. Just I have seen too much whining about "...don't use stereotypes, I'm offended..." So I was just nipping it in the butt before too much whining occurred. Whiners are one of my pet peeves. This entire site is full of so many different people and lets be honest, some of us can be lumped together under labels, but yes admittedly some of us can not be, we are exceptions to the rules and categories. I love all my brothers and sisters equally and enjoy all of our craziness and differences. Our lives are complicated enough and we don't need whiners and complainers to drag us down. So I was just making a point....If you can't stand the heat get the F out of the kitchen.

And you think calling people - other site members - "whiners" is the way to "nip something in the" bud? Interesting approach.

I'm just trying to follow the logic here, and wonder if you see any irony in attacking people who's pet peeve is stereotypes, while claiming the right to air your pet peeve.

I think it's safe to say, it's the "whiners and complainers" who have brought the heat, and we're firmly in the kitchen.

I suppose you can slap another "label" on a word all you want but the action remains the some. So okay, my evolved word for "stereotype" is "label."

It may be your word, but you would be speaking a different language than most people. "Label" and "stereotype" aren't even in the same genus.

[Julie]

I think it's safe to say, it's the "whiners and complainers" who have brought the heat, and we're firmly in the kitchen.


Contrary to Femme Stereotypical (love those butches who want to put me in the kitchen)...

LOL Not this Girl ~ No way - No how ~ Am I in the kitchen
I will wear an apron (and that is all) but never in the kitchen... Ahem!
Scary - banish the vision Julie (make it go away).

[betenoire]

Excuse me, but would you people please stop arguing for a few minutes and light my cigarette?

Thanks!

[BullDog]

Welcome to BFP, CausticPrincess.

[Ebon]

Excuse me, but would you people please stop arguing for a few minutes and light my cigarette?

Thanks!

:vigil: There you go bete...:) I couldn't find a lighter one.

[sweetbutch26]

again i wasn't directing it at femmes. but yes it did happen. i mistook a straight lady for a femme and got hit with a purse and yea it hurt. not sure how saying something that actually happened is stereotyping O.o

[betenoire]

:vigil: There you go bete...:) I couldn't find a lighter one.

Thanks.

Now I feel insensitive for talking about smoking. :(

[Guy]

I was hit with a purse once, felt kinda good actually.

[KimKawashima]

I don't understand your logic and you don't understand mine. Can't it just left at that. And my original point was why start with someone for using a so called stereotype if that is what we choose to do? So me expressing wanting to use them and you telling me it offends you is no different than you telling me I can not tell your offense to my stereotyping is offensive. It is a vicious cycle. So needless to say if you want to have at it. Call me old fashioned, but I have better things to do like fight for our rights as I have since high school and not waste any more of my energy on this

[Velvetkitten]

Is work the right place?

Isn't there some other social network?
Caustic P if a cute Butch is sitting in your chair go for it. You are in the proper line of work for it and as Kim said just use a neutral line of questions.

[Mister Bent]

I was hit with a purse once, felt kinda good actually.


I prefer a good slap in the face, but that's a different thread...

[KimKawashima]

Caustic P if a cute Butch is sitting in your chair go for it. You are in the proper line of work for it and as Kim said just use a neutral line of questions.

Absolutely, Hair Dressers actually have a lot more freedom than some other lines of work depending on the salon. Being in a mall on your breaks or before or after work you have a lot of people around you as well. Good luck in your search! :byebye:

[The_Lady_Snow]

I don't understand your logic and you don't understand mine. Can't it just left at that. And my original point was why start with someone for using a so called stereotype if that is what we choose to do? So me expressing wanting to use them and you telling me it offends you is no different than you telling me I can not tell your offense to my stereotyping is offensive. It is a vicious cycle. So needless to say if you want to have at it. Call me old fashioned, but I have better things to do like fight for our rights as I have since high school and not waste any more of my energy on this

We call out stereotypes because some of us do not fit them and it makes it difficult and frankly it's offensive to be cast into something we are not.

I am still ok with calling them out even though you think it is not ok.

:)

Snow~A Masculine Femme Top Leather Daddy who hates the kitchen and leads her household.

[betenoire]

I prefer a good slap in the face, but that's a different thread...

Dirty!

I think the OP should try the greyhound station. No exaggeration, but I've met several Butches at greyhound stations. I don't know what that's all about. The cutest one EVER was in Detroit - but I was attached at the time so I just chatted and smoked and left.

Seriously. Greyhound.

[Ebon]

I don't understand your logic and you don't understand mine. Can't it just left at that. And my original point was why start with someone for using a so called stereotype if that is what we choose to do? So me expressing wanting to use them and you telling me it offends you is no different than you telling me I can not tell your offense to my stereotyping is offensive. It is a vicious cycle. So needless to say if you want to have at it. Call me old fashioned, but I have better things to do like fight for our rights as I have since high school and not waste any more of my energy on this

We call out stereotypes because some of us do not fit them and it makes it difficult and frankly it's offensive to be cast into something we are not.

I am still ok with calling them out even though you think it is not ok.

:)

Snow~A Masculine Femme Top Leather Daddy who hates the kitchen and leads her household.

Kumbaya!!!!!!!! :praying:

CP welcome to the planet. I hope you enjoy....:)

I do love it here and I enjoy it here with all of my brothers and sisters. :)

[waxnrope]

And awayyyyy we go ...

Seriously, you wouldn't find me or SOME other butches at the mall. Just saying. Then again, unlike the other posts, I haven't any other real useful suggestions :giggle: Perhaps a concert or other musical event. A dance? Then again, library? Lol. I have a few butch friends who are librarians, if you like that stereotype. Lol. Why limit yourself to one location? If you persist, as was suggested on the first page, you'll do fine.

[morningstar55]

LOVE this site...I am having fun reading and dreaming.......This Femme is yearning for her STUD......ButchDaddy....SweetBoi........ There is a large community here where I live, but havent any idea how to find my butch!! Its almost like they are all in hiding!! ...asking a word of advice from the butches out there......

I cut hair in the local Mall.....How do I make a first move if I see a sweet Butch strolling the mall or in my chair...is that uncouth..? Should I just zip it and let her find me...?? Give her direct eye contact...??? HELP!!

Happy Sunday everyone!!!

gawd..... im such a dork sometimes..........
Caustic. welcome to the Planet...... lol ..... this is a very good topic for alot of us girls here... ty

[sweetbutch26]

what wax said. you can't limit yourself to one specific place. you kind of have to put yourself out a little more. if you live in a large lgbt community check for local events coming your way.

[Gemme]

In my purse I carry whatever I happen to be reading at the moment, my new Nintendo DSi (woo!), a black magic marker, and my cigarettes.

I do not carry a lighter. Instead I just stand around holding my cigarette to my lips and looking helpless until some drooling masculine type rushes up to light it for me.

:blueheels:

It should be a red marker. I saw an American Dad episode where Stan took his son, Steve, to a war re-enactment. They used red markers instead of weapons. I think it could catch on. :blink:

Black magic marker??? What are you a tagger?

That's classified.

No. It's just sometimes I come across things that need to be edited.

So, YOU'RE the one......:thinking:

Thanks.

Now I feel insensitive for talking about smoking. :(

You should be.

My lungs are offended at the very mention of it.




:welcome: to BFP, CausticPrincess!

Just be yourself and those who you are meant to meet, you will. :)

[Guy]

You would find ME at the mall, jus sayin'

[Sam]

uses a barber..

[CausticPrincess]

Hmmmmm.....lots of great advice....a few slams......a comment about my name.....and some heated discussion......wow......and I just had a simple question.....no fear friends...I FEAR no one and dont run away from opinions or opinionated people.....its all good.....we are all here for the same thing.....friendship...comraderie....support.....a nswers......and if one is really lucky....LOVE......

Kisses and hugz to all....

K

[Tcountry]

*Tip Hat*
All princess and non-princess types are looked at...sometimes stared at... ;)
I don't remember who said it because I am not good at quoting, but it is true the more you put yourself out there, the better chances you will have...the worst anyone can do is say no (that goes for all of us, butch and femme).
It is interesting tho that a lot of us are very flirty in here and not so much in person...so establishing a connection in here is one way to go about possibly more, and if it doesn't work out I bet you get some pretty great friends from it. You'll be surprised how much you learn about a person when you actually "have to" talk to them...lol *teasing, sarcasm*
:bunchflowers: Have a gret Sunday, what's left of it...& good Luck!

[morningstar55]

*Tip Hat*
All princess and non-princess types are looked at...sometimes stared at... ;)
I don't remember who said it because I am not good at quoting, but it is true the more you put yourself out there, the better chances you will have...the worst anyone can do is say no (that goes for all of us, butch and femme).
It is interesting tho that a lot of us are very flirty in here and not so much in person...so establishing a connection in here is one way to go about possibly more, and if it doesn't work out I bet you get some pretty great friends from it. You'll be surprised how much you learn about a person when you actually "have to" talk to them...lol *teasing, sarcasm*
:bunchflowers: Have a gret Sunday, what's left of it...& good Luck!

.... very good post.. T :) ......
btw........ I think your tractor is sexy... hehehe

[betenoire]

And just so we're clear - I wasn't kidding about Greyhound stations. They're a fucking GOLDMINE.

But, really. I find if you want to meet people in general, you go to where your type of person would normally hang out.

Like 'em smart? Start lurking around independent bookstores. Like 'em pretentious? Start lurking around coffee shops (not starbucks). Like 'em nerdy? Start lurking around comic book stores. Like 'em to completely forget you exist for weeks at a time? Start lurking around video game stores.

And GO TO THE BAR. That's the whole reason that queer bars exist. So we have somewhere to drink, dance, and meet other queers. And if dance clubs are too loud/obnoxious/meat markety for you (and, believe me I understand that. oy)...it doesn't have to be a dance club. You said where you live has a pretty big community - so USE that community. I'm sure there has got to be at least one sit-down Dyke bar - go there and sit down. Does your city or a nearby city have a gayborhood? Yes? GO THERE. Walk around. Get a latte and read a book. Pet strange people's dogs. Say hello to strangers. SMILE. Stare back.

Edit!!!

Get in touch with your nearest LGBTI centre. Sign up for some stuff - I bet they have stuff. Take a self-defense class for Queer Women. Volunteer for Queer events. Go to book launches. See live bands. Participate in protests. Eat alone at sidewalk cafes. Just GET OUTSIDE.

[KimKawashima]

Hmmmmm.....lots of great advice....a few slams......a comment about my name.....and some heated discussion......wow......and I just had a simple question.....no fear friends...I FEAR no one and dont run away from opinions or opinionated people.....its all good.....we are all here for the same thing.....friendship...comraderie....support.....a nswers......and if one is really lucky....LOVE......

Kisses and hugz to all....

K

I certainly hope you find what you are looking for. There are plenty of good butches out there that are looking for someone. My last relationship was 9 years and I met her at her job. I met my Baby Girl I am with now online and she is wonderful. You never know when love is going to blind side you.

[Julie]

Hmmmmm.....lots of great advice....a few slams......a comment about my name.....and some heated discussion......wow......and I just had a simple question.....no fear friends...I FEAR no one and dont run away from opinions or opinionated people.....its all good.....we are all here for the same thing.....friendship...comraderie....support.....a nswers......and if one is really lucky....LOVE......

Kisses and hugz to all....

K

I have to say... I am really humbled by your response to all of the various posts you have received. I being one of the "more heated," people here who responded.

You are here, and you did not run away, but have remained to even honor those of us, who might not have honored you in such a way.

We are all here for the same reason, Princess (not feeling you are so Caustic).

Welcome to the Planet and I look forward to reading some more of your words, and I wish for you - that in this massive world of ours, you are so blessed with finding that one special love in your life.

Julie (Caustic Yesterday - Still a bit today).

[CausticPrincess]

Awww...Julie....THANK YOU.......HUGE HUGZ......I can be TRULY Caustic...hence the name.....but no reason here.....everyone has bad days....good days.. long days and absolutely glorious days......and they all come and go....I just roll with the punches (when I can)...I took NO OFFENSE to your words.....Its all good darlin......
I am a Princess...a Diva....but with a WICKED tough skin....and a bit of a big ego ...LOL.....So lets have some coffee and solve all the worlds problems !!!

K

[Tcountry]

:tea: How bout some tea...(or T ;) )lol
Sorry...that is my mood today...
so great that you just put it out there and made the rest of us think..
I really like actually having to think about a topic and in the process put myself out there for whatever comes to be...("caustic" or not...sometimes it is a friendly reminder to get burnt)
Have a Great Week!! & Welcome again! :rrose:

[SassyLeo]

be yourself
smile and be happy
don't give a shit about what others think about how you are and enjoy your life, among many other things, this is what attracts people.

Sometimes strolling through a thread is like walking the gauntlet of the mean girls.

Isadora


I agree! When you exude -insert feeling here (happy, excited, fun, etc)- energy, I believe you attract like-minded energry :)

[julieisafemme]

I am new to the butch/femme dynamic. A good friend asked me one time how do you queer yourself? He was asking when I am not with my partner how do I communicate to the world at large that I am queer? I thought this was an excellent question. I am still working out how that works for me. I guess what I am saying is that if you queer yourself in general then butches will see you too!!!

[rlin]

i suggest the greatest femme weapon of all time...
eye contact... and a smile...
even here... in text.... it still works...
i guess i should add....if you look at me... and i notice... (i own a bit of a 2x4 mentality...)
if you look at me and smile and then put yourself into my space sometime... even as thick as i can be i will still see the writing on the wall....
in my case after i figure it out i will do the rest...
others... you may actually have to talk to...

[KayCee]

This helps....http://www.trex.com/images/specs/LargeImgs/Decking-SquareEdgeBoard2.jpg....:cheesy:

[sweetbutch26]

This helps....http://www.trex.com/images/specs/LargeImgs/Decking-SquareEdgeBoard2.jpg....:cheesy:

hey that kinda turns me on. like hit me again

[Luckydwg07]

A simple smile works for me. Maybe hand them a company card with your name & salon's number so they can schedule a hair cut with you :)