What is your Flirtation Style?

[AtLast]

I am a complete idiot when it come to flirting! Have no sense about it at all. Worse thing is, it takes me forever to figure out if a femme is even flirting with me! There have been more than a few times my friends have had to "clue" me in! BONK!!!

So, I figured there are many members here that could enlighten those of us that are just not good flirts with telling us about how they do it!

Let's have a fun time here! Let your flirtation techniques run free!!!

[pajama]

Well it figures that Rico Suave gets to be the first to respond. ;)

Quite honestly...my flirtation style is honesty. I'm not shy about telling people that I think they are attractive, witty, smart, sexy, etc. I will usually be straight forward and tell them I think they are attractive. Some folks on here view me as just a flirt or player. When in fact, I am being honest and straigtforward. The catch to this is you can't be shy. You have to voice your opinion. Also when I tell someone how I feel about them, it isn't in the hopes of "hooking up". I do it because we all like compliments, honest compliments. So I do it to just let that person know that I think they are special.

The honest compliment opens the door for other conversations.

A

[Sachita]

I am not very coy when it comes to approaching someone. If I'm interested I will approach. If they are not receptive or a 2 X 4, I quickly lose interest. I don't chase after anyone. I am more the type of woman you have to get my attention and then keep it. Therefore I am more drawn to straightforward and cerebral approach. I really dislike sexual innuendo in the beginning. I’m very open-minded but reserve that level of flirting for a lover. I want someone that steps up and initiates but isn’t overbearing about it. Some women go for that aloof and mysterious type. It just does nothing for me. I’m more the type that wants you to show you are interested and work at my affection. Only then might you unleash the seductress in me and watch out.

Everyone is different when it comes to the flirting game. I don’t know you very well but from my observation I would guess that friendship is very important to you in a lover- as it should be. You are more likely to befriend someone and see where that goes. I’m the same way but I think my disadvantage, which could be yours too, is that we have these walls and almost “too” careful to allow anything to bloom in that friendship. I admire people who can instantly respond to chemistry and just go with it. I’m far too methodical. Perhaps more so as I get older.

But I love flirting and playfulness. Even if nothing happens. I have a few friends that I can do this with and it never goes beyond that which is fine. I have had some heated and passionate romance in my time with heavy doses of flirting. I would LOVE to do another round of that!

Just be yourself but know that the women that might interest you, again an observation will probably want some hints, a dash of the chivalry you hide so well and an expression of passion. I think at our age, not that we are old but highly experienced our radar is looking for something deeper than a casual interlude might present.

[Sachita]

Perfect answer. I totally agree.


Well it figures that Rico Suave gets to be the first to respond. ;)

Quite honestly...my flirtation style is honesty. I'm not shy about telling people that I think they are attractive, witty, smart, sexy, etc. I will usually be straight forward and tell them I think they are attractive. Some folks on here view me as just a flirt or player. When in fact, I am being honest and straigtforward. The catch to this is you can't be shy. You have to voice your opinion. Also when I tell someone how I feel about them, it isn't in the hopes of "hooking up". I do it because we all like compliments, honest compliments. So I do it to just let that person know that I think they are special.

The honest compliment opens the door for other conversations.

A

[sweetbutch26]

i just get on my pretty boi swag say hello and be my normal sweet charming self

[rockybcn]

When first meeting someone.....I enjoy a quick witted banter. Humor goes a long way with me. A woman who will laugh with me has already captured my attention. You can also tell by her smile and her eyes that she is enjoying herself as well. Sexual innuendos spoken both verbally and or physically, they are not flattering for me. A woman who can entertain me right away with her mind....she is the one I want to know.

[sweetbutch26]

When first meeting someone.....I enjoy a quick witted banter. Humor goes a long way with me. A woman who will laugh with me has already captured my attention. You can also tell by her smile and her eyes that she is enjoying herself as well. Sexual innuendos spoken both verbally and or physically, they are not flattering for me. A woman who can entertain me right away with her mind....she is the one I want to know.

amen bro well said :)

[Sachita]

When first meeting someone.....I enjoy a quick witted banter. Humor goes a long way with me. A woman who will laugh with me has already captured my attention. You can also tell by her smile and her eyes that she is enjoying herself as well. Sexual innuendos spoken both verbally and or physically, they are not flattering for me. A woman who can entertain me right away with her mind....she is the one I want to know.

excellent

someone once said to me "if you don't kiss and have sex right away how do you know you'll enjoy each other sexually? Sex is important."

Believe it or not lots of people think this way and talk about sex almost right away to establish compatibility. This is an instant turn off for me. I'm like you, make me laugh, spark the playfulness inside of me and intrigue me. Then let me see your substance and that you are capable of a good foundation with me. If all these things measure up I have no doubt I will sexually rock your world. Sex is the easy part IMO.

[Laerkin]

Ooooo. Good thread!

I love flirting. Love love love. Flirting is certainly an art form and everyone executes it and responds to it a little differently.

Flirting requires confidence, so right off the bat that's appealing. Flirting, for me, is about more than "Hey baby, you're hot."

It's more about the smiles and the lingering eye contact. It's in the laughter and genuinely complimenting people. As the others have said, it's about honesty and establishing a connection that draws people in.

Flirting requires engaged conversation and great listening skills and making people feel good about themselves.

Of course, flirting with someone doesn't mean they get the message (some butches need to be hit over the head with a frying pan before they get the hint) and some people simply aren't interested. And that's okay too! In my opinion, flirting doesn't have to be sexual in nature and it can be innocent. It's fun to get to know new people and to make someone smile and to walk away feeling special.

Fun topic. I can't wait to read the conversations that will develop out of this one. Lol.

[rockybcn]

excellent

someone once said to me "if you don't kiss and have sex right away how do you know you'll enjoy each other sexually? Sex is important."

Believe it or not lots of people think this way and talk about sex almost right away to establish compatibility. This is an instant turn off for me. I'm like you, make me laugh, spark the playfulness inside of me and intrigue me. Then let me see your substance and that you are capable of a good foundation with me. If all these things measure up I have no doubt I will sexually rock your world. Sex is the easy part IMO.

Exacto mundo Sachita!!! Maybe its an age thing(I´m old!!!)....but everything comes in stages...its how one wishes to take it to the next level of the flirtation(If there is one). I always enjoyed the courting stage. It gave me time to watch for consistancy in a person. When dating,she could tell me just everything she wanted me to know about herself ...but I observed for myself and time always revealed many truths. Have fun...enjoy the art of great conversation,lots of laughter, the comfort level in each others silence, the sweetness of holding hands. Because when you get old and she is still by your side....you will have made fond memories.

[Tucker]

Flirting is the naughty looks from across the room, devious smiles, misbehaving, and generally not feeling bad for anything you say. Blame it on the moment.

[Glenn]

I am a complete idiot when it come to flirting! Have no sense about it at all. Worse thing is, it takes me forever to figure out if a femme is even flirting with me! There have been more than a few times my friends have had to "clue" me in! BONK!!!

So, I figured there are many members here that could enlighten those of us that are just not good flirts with telling us about how they do it!

Let's have a fun time here! Let your flirtation techniques run free!!!

It's not about what you say, it's what you demonstrate and project. The power of confidence is massive. It must lie in the fact that it is HONEST. Genuine to the turbo-max. All of successful flirting is based on HONESTY X 1000. Don't just be yourself,...BE yourself... BE yourself to the HILT. This will make you an Apocalyptic Flirter that demonstrates a Shock and Awe style.
Example: You see someone you'd like to get with. You rock up to them and say in a confident, level, voice: "Hey, how's it going?"
They will say;
"Fine."
You then say:
"Cool. What are you doing later?"
She will say:
"I'm not sure.
You then say:
"Do you want to come home with me?":blink:

[jenny]

Directness... focused attention... banter... eye contact. Flirtation, for me, is all about intelligence, humor, and a forthright style of communication.

[Sachita]

Exacto mundo Sachita!!! Maybe its an age thing(I´m old!!!)....but everything comes in stages...its how one wishes to take it to the next level of the flirtation(If there is one). I always enjoyed the courting stage. It gave me time to watch for consistancy in a person. When dating,she could tell me just everything she wanted me to know about herself ...but I observed for myself and time always revealed many truths. Have fun...enjoy the art of great conversation,lots of laughter, the comfort level in each others silence, the sweetness of holding hands. Because when you get old and she is still by your side....you will have made fond memories.

I envy you sweetie. kiss

Thats why I have the three month rule. I dont care if my pussy is dripping and I want to jump your bones... I wait. I know that without a foundation it won't last. Now there has been times when I broke that rule, not very often, BUT it was a needed moment. It did not last. In fact I know this cute little FTM and for some reason we have this amazing chemistry. Its been like that for years. A year can go by and we see each other and BAM. Its amazing. But when its done its done. I love him like family but have zero interest in a relationship. I wouldnt do him if I was in a committed relationship.

Now if that happened again and more often I might need to change that rule. lol but then I would look at it all as a spiritual evolution of spirit. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever connect with one completely or if that lies in my future. Life is ever changing.

[Soft*Silver]

I never realized I use the gift of laughter as the main part of my flirting style. Well, maybe I dont. I think I am just a happy joyous person and if I am attracted to someone, laughter just naturally comes of it. I am told I have a great laugh. I know I feel really at home in it so it springs from me.

to flirt with me, all someone has to say is the word "horse" in a sentance. LOL....

intelligence is important to me. And thats doesnt mean just IQ. Social intelligence, creative intelligence, and empathetic intelligence are equally if not more important to me.

[Jude]

Example: You see someone you'd like to get with. You rock up to them and say in a confident, level, voice: "Hey, how's it going?"
They will say;
"Fine."
You then say:
"Cool. What are you doing later?"
She will say:
"I'm not sure.
You then say:
"Do you want to come home with me?":blink:[/QUOTE]

__________________________________

May it's just my age, but I'd be concerned that you were BOTH infected.

[ravfem]

*taking notes*

[Canela]

This.Is.Fabulous!


Loving these responses!


Subscribing.

[sweetbutch26]

*taking notes*


-peeks at ravfem's notes-

[ravfem]

-peeks at ravfem's notes-

*quickly covering notepad*

hey!! i need all the help i can get!!

[Maria]

Example: You see someone you'd like to get with. You rock up to them and say in a confident, level, voice: "Hey, how's it going?"
They will say;
"Fine."
You then say:
"Cool. What are you doing later?"
She will say:
"I'm not sure.
You then say:
"Do you want to come home with me?":blink:

__________________________________

Maybe it's just my age, but I'd be concerned that you were BOTH infected.[/QUOTE]

Infected with awesome.

[pajama]

Example: You see someone you'd like to get with. You rock up to them and say in a confident, level, voice: "Hey, how's it going?"
They will say;
"Fine."
You then say:
"Cool. What are you doing later?"
She will say:
"I'm not sure.
You then say:
"Do you want to come home with me?":blink:

I would then say: *snicker* *pat on head* *walk away chuckling*

[Gemme]

It's not about what you say, it's what you demonstrate and project. ....

Example: You see someone you'd like to get with. You rock up to them and say in a confident, level, voice: "Hey, how's it going?"
They will say;
"Fine."
You then say:
"Cool. What are you doing later?"
She will say:
"I'm not sure.
You then say:
"Do you want to come home with me?":blink:

While confidence is a beautiful thing, I have to disagree. What you say DOES matter. In this specific example of dialogue given, I'd walk as far away from you as possible at the very least. I find the "Do you want to come home with me?" devoid of class and filled to the brim with obnoxious cockiness. There is a significant difference between confidence and cockiness. One, I like. The other, I don't.

For my own personal style, I'm definitely a flirt. An equal opportunity one, at that. I flirt with little old ladies and men and sanitation engineers and grocery store clerks. Flirting is like breathing for me; completely natural.

There are different degrees of flirtation. Sexual innuendo doesn't enter the picture with the vast majority of my flirting. Often there is a bit of a naughty 'air' but nothing explicit or drawn out. I only go hardcore for someone I am interested in seeing first thing the next morning, complete with bedhead and dragon breath.

I don't have a specific style, really, now that I think about it. I adapt to what the situation and the specific person seem to enjoy without losing myself or exposing myself too much.

[jenny]

There is a significant difference between confidence and cockiness. One, I like. The other, I don't.


Very well said -- I couldn't agree more!!!!

For my own personal style, I'm definitely a flirt. An equal opportunity one, at that. I flirt with little old ladies and men and sanitation engineers and grocery store clerks. Flirting is like breathing for me; completely natural.

There are different degrees of flirtation. Sexual innuendo doesn't enter the picture with the vast majority of my flirting. Often there is a bit of a naughty 'air' but nothing explicit or drawn out.

I'm just hoping you put that naughty air away when you're flirting with the little old ladies... <G>

[Rockinonahigh]

Once I thought had a pretty good style of meeting ppl,lots of southern charm,southern accent,some good old fashion conversation ect...Till I went to the bf Dallas bash...all those hot lookeing sexy femmes in one place.Well you gessed it,all I could do was to try to get out of the duhhhhhh phase of saying anything..I havent been that toung tied since I was a kid,there was this really beautiful femme at the bar that I wanted to atleast say hello to but all I did was turn red,sweat and freez up..at my age to boot.So I gess I may need a whack with a 2x4 to get going or she may well have to say hello first.

[Soft*Silver]

now look, butches and transfolks...stop the worrying about approaching us ladies. We are honored when you hike up your belt and saunter on over and cough and say hello. We love that little bit of sweat and fear that goes along with your confidence and courage. Its all there in you and thats what we love so much. Your "mix". We dont need lines or model handsomeness or suave conversation or flashy fashions to impress us. We want to see that look in your eye that says to us silently, that you are in awe of us. For just being us.

take it down a notch...dont be so in awe that it paralyzes you. We NEED you...so take a swallow and mosey on over....

[MrSunshine]

Takes too much energy so I don't do it. If I want something I say so.

[ravfem]

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

:hippie:

[Gemme]

[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]


Very well said -- I couldn't agree more!!!!



I'm just hoping you put that naughty air away when you're flirting with the little old ladies... <G>

You might be surprised how many do like a little naughty with their afternoon tea. :winky:

[MysticOceansFL]

I'm pretty much myself I don't do anything special that I recall.

[Ebon]

I like to laugh with my flirtation target or mess with them. Tease them a bit in a playful way.

[Blade]

Confidence, close to cocky actually some people say I'm cocky. Oh well I don't flirt, but I know I will catch flack for that statement, but um I guess my down home southern charm and my eyes which everyone seems to love sometimes are interpreted as flirting.

[AtLast]

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

:hippie:

Nah!

All in the eye of the beholder!

[Gemme]

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

:hippie:

If it works for you, don't fix it. :)

It just makes me want to sock the smirk off their faces when it starts getting high and I didn't bring my waders, yanno?

[AtLast]

While confidence is a beautiful thing, I have to disagree. What you say DOES matter. In this specific example of dialogue given, I'd walk as far away from you as possible at the very least. I find the "Do you want to come home with me?" devoid of class and filled to the brim with obnoxious cockiness. There is a significant difference between confidence and cockiness. One, I like. The other, I don't.

For my own personal style, I'm definitely a flirt. An equal opportunity one, at that. I flirt with little old ladies and men and sanitation engineers and grocery store clerks. Flirting is like breathing for me; completely natural.

There are different degrees of flirtation. Sexual innuendo doesn't enter the picture with the vast majority of my flirting. Often there is a bit of a naughty 'air' but nothing explicit or drawn out. I only go hardcore for someone I am interested in seeing first thing the next morning, complete with bedhead and dragon breath.

I don't have a specific style, really, now that I think about it. I adapt to what the situation and the specific person seem to enjoy without losing myself or exposing myself too much.

Oh, yeah, to me there is a big difference between confidence and cockiness. For both butches and femmes......

I am awkward with flirtation, but have taken in when someone's cocky flirtation style falls lands them right on their ass.

[Duchess]

My darling HDD you would be the one starting this thread :).

I feel as though I was born with the flirty gene. However, if I truly like someone they know it. I'm very comfortable letting a person know how I feel about them. I might even like them enough to have my own nickname for them. ;)

Duchess

[AtLast]

If it works for you, don't fix it. :)

It just makes me want to sock the smirk off their faces when it starts getting high and I didn't bring my waders, yanno?

ROTFL!!! Ah, Geez! But yes... whatever works!

I just realized that the space in which I am most comfortable with flirting is through dance. Partner dancing. When I lead a good follow and we are in sync, I see her pride and twinkle (the lead's job is at all times, to make the follow look good!)! It is a dance of a kind of flirtation for me. Hummm... a mode of confidence! LOL... does get conversation flowing!

Oh, good, I have a style of flirtation!

[ravfem]

If it works for you, don't fix it. :)

It just makes me want to sock the smirk off their faces when it starts getting high and I didn't bring my waders, yanno?

ohhhhhhh!! What you call "cocky" i call a "charmer"!!

Yeah, no i don't care much for that type.

BS gets you zero stars!

[Cowboi]

its been so long, I can't seem to remember...........

[princessbelle]

Coolness thread!!!

Enjoyed the reading and thinking bout it all. Gosh, flirting, for me, just comes natural as I read some of you feel the same.

It is so much easier in person. It is so engaging to walk past someone i find interesting, get the attention, flash a smile and blush at exactly 3 seconds after making eye contact and look away. If all is well at that point then it may be time to offer up a game of pool, lean just right over that pool table and then gaze back to see where the eyes are. If the preliminary flirting is found to be receptive, then it is time to see if intellectually it is a match...if it is..then flirting is even more fun. It's in the walk, the smile, the wording, and the feminine "ways" for me at least.

It is just easier in person...it's just natural and man alive is it fun.

Online however, I find it very difficult. You can't see how the other person is really responding and i tend to put a lot of "lol"s in my convo just so the other person knows i'm smiling if i'm being a little "over the top" and confident.

The jury is still out if i am any good at online flirting i think...

But offer me a pool stick, a drink or a great conversation...and it's smooth sailing.

[Sam]

usually my smile and luckily girls start the flirtation.

[AtLast]

My darling HDD you would be the one starting this thread :).

I feel as though I was born with the flirty gene. However, if I truly like someone they know it. I'm very comfortable letting a person know how I feel about them. I might even like them enough to have my own nickname for them. ;)

Duchess

Ah! The Duchess!!!

And, there is no one else that has their very own nickname for me! What can I say! Besides, WOW!!!

Hummm.... you have that priceless flirty gene that is like that is unasumming about their beauty... because it's about the entire being, all of their characteristics and the flow of the combinations.

I tend to find understatement the hottest!

Oh, and you have me blushing!

[cara]

my flirtation style? i don't think i have one. usually when i'm attracted to someone and they are near me, i turn into a bumbling idiot. :|

:stillheart:

[dixie]

my flirtation style? i don't think i have one. usually when i'm attracted to someone and they are near me, i turn into a bumbling idiot. :|

:stillheart:

Exactly! If I actually like the person, I too become a bumbling idiot who always says the wrong thing and just sits there and giggles a lot. :(

I'm a little more bold online though, and will rep them or start a general conversation with them. It just varies. If I see a window of opportunity I usually try to jump thru it without bumping my head! lol

Now if I'm just flirting for the fun of flirting, then I have all the confidence in the world. The sultry smile, the batting eyelashes, the light touching, the rather forward phrases...

[cane]

When flirting I find that my eyes are a gold mine since they have a really extraordinary colour.

Not that I'm flirting theese days, Oh no...would never happen!

Otherwise I think that straight forward is the way to go. When I met my wife for example, after knowing her for some time I went up to her on a party and told her that I was interrested in her and that I thought that she felt the same. I think she was a little thrown by my lack of shyness, but it worked. Of course she had a boyfriend (and was straight) at the time so it's never just straight forward, but flirting goes well together with honesty, works every time.

[Ryobi]

I flirt with everybody.(ask the giant hairy guy I work with. lol) I can't help it. I like to see people smile, I like to give compliments. My compliments aren't a fun fluff flirt, I mean them. And I love seeing the look (or smile) on peoples faces when they realize, "I'm being flirted with."
Flirting almost got me in trouble once, big trouble. I worked nights at a CBRF that was specific to Alzheimer's disease. All of the elderly took me as guy. (which had some serious advantages with showering and dressing the old dudes. I was one of the boys, they didn't feel awkward.) I flirted with the ladies (residents) on a regular basis. I think that worked wonders in getting people that were scared in general because they don't know what's happening to them, to trust me. I rarely had a problem with residents. One day a co-worker thought that me flirting with the resident was the most disgusting thing she had ever seen and called "the state" to tell them what I was doing. A Rep showed up one night to "observe" me. (and I went on as usual. I knew I wasn't doing anything wrong. Nothing was sexual about it.) In the morning I could hear him in the office with admin. and the woman with the problem saying, "if you had 10 more people on staff like that, this place would win awards!" (he was mad.) Admin never had a problem with me, it was that one person and she quit 2 days later.
Anyway, yeah, flirting is just in me. Compliment on anything with a smile and a sparkle in your eye. If I'm working on or in a relationship, flirting is more specific and you will know I'm talkin to you. It confuses some but, I don't flirt for my advantage, I flirt for yours. (not meant cocky)
However, I'm not 2x4 when it comes to people flirting with me. I'm more like 4x8. *shrug*.

[jey_z76]

First things first..... BODY LANGUAGE!

Body language shows quite a bit on whether someone is interested in you or not.
I know this may sound kind of strange or odd, but if you are still confused by all of what everyone has said, watch the movie, "He's Just Not Into You". I know the title may seem stupid, but trust me.... it has helped me out a lot when it comes to how I show someone that I'm interested and especially if they aren't interested in me.

You can download it from piratebay.org .

Hope this helps!

~J~

[jey_z76]

Just gonna edit one thing..... the movie is actually, "He's Just Not That Into You".

[AtLast]

I flirt with everybody.(ask the giant hairy guy I work with. lol) I can't help it. I like to see people smile, I like to give compliments. My compliments aren't a fun fluff flirt, I mean them. And I love seeing the look (or smile) on peoples faces when they realize, "I'm being flirted with."
Flirting almost got me in trouble once, big trouble. I worked nights at a CBRF that was specific to Alzheimer's disease. All of the elderly took me as guy. (which had some serious advantages with showering and dressing the old dudes. I was one of the boys, they didn't feel awkward.) I flirted with the ladies (residents) on a regular basis. I think that worked wonders in getting people that were scared in general because they don't know what's happening to them, to trust me. I rarely had a problem with residents. One day a co-worker thought that me flirting with the resident was the most disgusting thing she had ever seen and called "the state" to tell them what I was doing. A Rep showed up one night to "observe" me. (and I went on as usual. I knew I wasn't doing anything wrong. Nothing was sexual about it.) In the morning I could hear him in the office with admin. and the woman with the problem saying, "if you had 10 more people on staff like that, this place would win awards!" (he was mad.) Admin never had a problem with me, it was that one person and she quit 2 days later.
Anyway, yeah, flirting is just in me. Compliment on anything with a smile and a sparkle in your eye. If I'm working on or in a relationship, flirting is more specific and you will know I'm talkin to you. It confuses some but, I don't flirt for my advantage, I flirt for yours. (not meant cocky)
However, I'm not 2x4 when it comes to people flirting with me. I'm more like 4x8. *shrug*.

This is such a kewl post!

[chefhmboyrd]

i am a big flirt..........
full frontal flirting is my style..........
lol

[girl_dee]

even though i've been told i'm a natural flirt i don't think i've ever tried to flirt.

[WomenMoveMe]

I am the world's worst flirter. I have no skill whatsoever. I rarely even know I am being flirted with, much less how to return it. I always think I am just talking with someone, then I am told I was flirting. Who knew?

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I can’t flirt even if my life depended on it! I’ve been told numerous times that my naturally bubbly, cheerful and friendly personality “Sends out flirting” signals and is seen as a “Come on!” :blink:

Online is the worst for me, because it’s mistakenly assumed that I’m desperately trying to flirt with everyone when that is genuinely not that case.

When I’m interested in a woman, I’ll smile and gently hold hys/her gaze for a little longer.

[deedarino]

Full Frontal Flirting; nice...

Flirting is good for the soul, and for the souls around you. As long as it is sincere, I don't ever flirt above the level of my intention.

[Sweet Bliss]

:hangloose::tarot::rainbowAfro::blueheels::vigil:

[TheMerryFairy]

I keep it very casual - friendly and innocent. I am flirty by nature so often it can be misunderstood. If I have an actual interest I let it be known so that there's no mistaking one for the other

[Girl_On_Fire]

Is it bad that i kinda like cockiness, as well as confidence?

Should i do some self-examining?

:hippie:

Ha ha! Oh my God, I'm so turned-on by cockiness and I know I shouldn't be. I don't know what's hot about some butch thinking hy's God's gift but if somebody did walk up to me and invite me to go home with hym that night, I wouldn't but I wouldn't be able to resist talking with hym for a bit. I like dominance but there's always that fine line. If you end up with somebody like that, do you end up having to deal with the massive ego for the duration of the relationship or is that just what hy leads with?

Oh, and I have no game. My problem is I can't read facial expressions and body language well so I'm never quite sure who I should be flirting with. A friend and I were just talking about this today. My problem is when I'm out at a club or something like that, I may see somebody I find attractive but I don't know how to subtly let them know that. I either look away because I can't deal with the uncomfortable eye contact or I smile in a kind of weird way because I'm nervous....I dunno. I've been told I'm unapproachable but I'm not sure how to be approachable without, I don't know, overdoing it. So yes, flirting is a big puzzle for me.

[TheMerryFairy]

Ha ha! Oh my God, I'm so turned-on by cockiness and I know I shouldn't be. I don't know what's hot about some butch thinking hy's God's gift but if somebody did walk up to me and invite me to go home with hym that night, I wouldn't but I wouldn't be able to resist talking with hym for a bit. I like dominance but there's always that fine line. If you end up with somebody like that, do you end up having to deal with the massive ego for the duration of the relationship or is that just what hy leads with?

Oh, and I have no game. My problem is I can't read facial expressions and body language well so I'm never quite sure who I should be flirting with. A friend and I were just talking about this today. My problem is when I'm out at a club or something like that, I may see somebody I find attractive but I don't know how to subtly let them know that. I either look away because I can't deal with the uncomfortable eye contact or I smile in a kind of weird way because I'm nervous....I dunno. I've been told I'm unapproachable but I'm not sure how to be approachable without, I don't know, overdoing it. So yes, flirting is a big puzzle for me.

My friend, a crush actually, is the same way *smiles* I love it. Everything is a puzzle to her and in turn she is a puzzle. She had me fascinated because I could never tell how she was feeling or what she was thinking due to her own confusion about my own expressions and things. You aren't unapproachable hny!

You just need to be you and someone will take interest in you and maybe be the one to approach.

[little_ms_sunshyne]

AWKWARD! I have no game. I end up laughing entirely too much out of being nervous, I bite my bottom lip quite a bit, I trip over MYSELF, and it just continues in this awkward sequence of events...Absolutely hopeless!!!!!!!!!

[TheMerryFairy]

AWKWARD! I have no game. I end up laughing entirely too much out of being nervous, I bite my bottom lip quite a bit, I trip over MYSELF, and it just continues in this awkward sequence of events...Absolutely hopeless!!!!!!!!!

This has been known to happen to me when I am trying to do more than flirt on a friendly innocent level. I am happy I am not the only one and I feel your pain. It's not hopeless! It comes down to meeting the right people, I think LOL.

[Girl_On_Fire]

My friend, a crush actually, is the same way *smiles* I love it. Everything is a puzzle to her and in turn she is a puzzle. She had me fascinated because I could never tell how she was feeling or what she was thinking due to her own confusion about my own expressions and things. You aren't unapproachable hny!

You just need to be you and someone will take interest in you and maybe be the one to approach.

Ha ha! I'm more approachable online I think. I carry myself like I'm 10 feet tall and bullet-proof. I'm a little thing but I'm mighty.

Actually, online flirting isn't hard for me. It's easy for me to use plain language and little emoticons. I don't have to "read" the person's body language or facial expressions. There's no guesswork. It's cut and dry. I've also been told I flirt all the time but I don't. I'm just kind and friendly to everyone and I guess it gets taken out of context sometimes.

Honestly, at this stage in the game, I don't want to be with somebody who doesn't have the guts to approach me. I'll drop a hankie so-to-speak but you gotta do the rest guys. ;)

[TheMerryFairy]

Ha ha! I'm more approachable online I think. I carry myself like I'm 10 feet tall and bullet-proof. I'm a little thing but I'm mighty.

Actually, online flirting isn't hard for me. It's easy for me to use plain language and little emoticons. I don't have to "read" the person's body language or facial expressions. There's no guesswork. It's cut and dry. I've also been told I flirt all the time but I don't. I'm just kind and friendly to everyone and I guess it gets taken out of context sometimes.

Honestly, at this stage in the game, I don't want to be with somebody who doesn't have the guts to approach me. I'll drop a hankie so-to-speak but you gotta do the rest guys. ;)

I also understand that as well! I really like getting to know you :) That's right, it's no fun if you have to do all of the work. You are worth knowing.

I flirt friendly but I am also friendly to everyone so that means sometimes people mistake one for the other. I try to be as clear as possible to avoid mix ups.

I can see how online flirting can be easier than in person. It's easier to crush too probably?

[Kent]

Ha ha! Oh my God, I'm so turned-on by cockiness and I know I shouldn't be. I don't know what's hot about some butch thinking hy's God's gift but if somebody did walk up to me and invite me to go home with hym that night, I wouldn't but I wouldn't be able to resist talking with hym for a bit. I like dominance but there's always that fine line. If you end up with somebody like that, do you end up having to deal with the massive ego for the duration of the relationship or is that just what hy leads with?

Oh, and I have no game. My problem is I can't read facial expressions and body language well so I'm never quite sure who I should be flirting with. A friend and I were just talking about this today. My problem is when I'm out at a club or something like that, I may see somebody I find attractive but I don't know how to subtly let them know that. I either look away because I can't deal with the uncomfortable eye contact or I smile in a kind of weird way because I'm nervous....I dunno. I've been told I'm unapproachable but I'm not sure how to be approachable without, I don't know, overdoing it. So yes, flirting is a big puzzle for me.

Girl_On_Fire:

A smile and eye contact works.. It lets the butch or guy you like know you are receptive and hy/he can approach you..

Kent

[Girl_On_Fire]

Girl_On_Fire:

A smile and eye contact works.. It lets the butch or guy you like know you are receptive and hy/he can approach you..

Kent

If I can relax my mouth enough to actually smile and not grimace this could work. lol! Thanks!

[TheMerryFairy]

If I can relax my mouth enough to actually smile and not grimace this could work. lol! Thanks!

My friend uses this trick - wearing sunglasses. Maybe not in a club but it works so she can look in a general direction of a person, even making it seem like she's keeping eyecontact but really she is looking off to the side. It might help you relax.

[Kent]

If I can relax my mouth enough to actually smile and not grimace this could work. lol! Thanks!

Girl_On_Fire:

Try the eye contact first and you may not even notice that you are smiling before you know it.. Try it..

[Angeltoes]

I have flirted very openly with butches at work with my eyes and smile. Honestly, I have had some look at me like I'm crazy, but the interesting thing is when they start to hover around my desk and try to get the eye contact back after I give up. Part of me wonders if they just didn't believe I'm gay and another thinks their ego misses the attention. Either way, I often hear butches say 'I'm shy.' Well, hey, I'm a shy person too. It hurts a femme just as much as it hurts a butch to put herself out there and be rejected.

[JustBeingMe]

I have flirted very openly with butches at work with my eyes and smile. Honestly, I have had some look at me like I'm crazy, but the interesting thing is when they start to hover around my desk and try to get the eye contact back after I give up. Part of me wonders if they just didn't believe I'm gay and another thinks their ego misses the attention. Either way, I often hear butches say 'I'm shy.' Well, hey, I'm a shy person too. It hurts a femme just as much as it hurts a butch to put herself out there and be rejected.

yes it does hun. yes it does. you stated that very very well , thank you soo much.

[Chad]

This thread looks fun.
I will not give up all my secrets but I will start here.

When I see (or read) someone that I find interesting I introduce myself and just start talking to them.

:flowers:

[homoe]

In real time, I'll start with a smile then more than likely strike up a conversation with them.

[Wrang1er]

I tend to use humor...perhaps I need to reevaluate this approach. ;)

[Chad]

I have been thinking about the flirting statement below because I do the exact same thing when I want to make a new friend.

I guess the difference would be the conversation topics.
For example, conversations on golf verses romance. :)


This thread looks fun.
I will not give up all my secrets but I will start here.

When I see (or read) someone that I find interesting I introduce myself and just start talking to them.

:flowers:

[Nattih]

My flirting style is trying to telepathically communicate that I like them and getting mad when they don't get the message. Hehe.

[TL1]

My flirting style is trying to telepathically communicate that I like them and getting mad when they don't get the message. Hehe.

LOLLLL

Cute!

[Shystonefem]

Ok... so, I have this look. If I am interested and you can see me, you know.

I am pretty shy so someone would have to start the conversation but that someone would definitely know.

Also, my body language. I am pretty good at that.

When I was a teenager, my friends used to make me go to the beach with them. If they liked some group of guys.... they would ask me to give them "the look". They ended up picking them up and I always went home alone. LOL

If I like you and we are in RL, you know......

[Angeltoes]

Awkward. The more strangely I behave the more I like someone haha. *forever alone*

[Kelt]

My style?

Obtuse.

In both directions.

It's a good thing I like being on my own. :thinking:

[easygoingfemme]

Hm, kind of depends on the energy I have going with the person but generally it will fall into categories of:

Humor, joking around
Eye contact
Forgetting to do any of that and blurting out a blunt "hi, I like something about you. Can we explore that?"

[jingles76]

Humor....Works on me . Might as well try it on others lol

[jingles76]

[QUOTE=Wrang1er;1035995]I tend to use humor...perhaps I need to reevaluate this approach. ;)[/QUOT

Wrangler. You had me at knock knock lol

[imperfect_cupcake]

Humour. Smart Arsery. Cheekiness. Comes across as far more charming and flirtatious in person but people with the matching senses of humour usually can pick up on it on line.

[imperfect_cupcake]

What works with me?

Not vague naughty. To me that sounds like pure cheese. I like *wit* and banter, not "soft and saucy".

Best way to impress me is - intellect, humour, cockiness, self deprecatory humour, able to take the piss out of me and laugh when I do it to them. And being blunt *really* helps. Not pushy, blunt. Say what you want and then while I panic, laugh, chill and make a joke and order anther drink, smoothly go into another subject and revisit the suggestion later, after I've gotten past my initial knee jerk panick reaction in my head. It will more than likely be yes.


If I look deer in headlights, fumble for a non-answer and be vague, that's a *really* good sign.
I I look perfectly calm, stare right at you and say "no thank you" in a polite voice - it's no.

The more polite I am, the less interested I am.

[CherryWine]

I'm a bit of a tease. If I like you, I'll pick on you in a playful manner...if I can work up the guts to do it.

[Nattih]

My flirting style is attentive and complimentary, I suppose. I am fairly quiet and keep to myself, so if I am paying a good amount of attention to you, that is a hint.

I am very complimentary and humorous if I like a person. Not sure how well everything plays over, given that the telepathy tends to have a higher batting average. That's why I prefer online dating, there is only one reason I am contacting you, lol.

[Lecheloco]

I have no idea :|

Does anyone have a 2x4 handy

[imperfect_cupcake]

I have no idea :|

Does anyone have a 2x4 handy

I like people to hit me with a cricket bat. But I like a bit of flare

[Lecheloco]

I like people to hit me with a cricket bat. But I like a bit of flare

* laughs
That works too

[randrum]

Non-existent.

I'm regularly thankful for my dimples because they make up for my complete lack of flirtation ability.

[TL1]

Non-existent.

I'm regularly thankful for my dimples because they make up for my complete lack of flirtation ability.

Me too on that one. And my hair.... I have crazy cool hair that a lot of women love.

If anyone flirts with me I'm usually oblivious

[Bèsame*]

innuendos. Can you catch on? Can you keep up? Will you have to wit to compete?

Or will you not keep my attention?

[Gráinne]

I missed out on the flirtation gene completely, both doing and receiving!

However, I'm in "like" with you if I'm cracking bad jokes, being klutzy, or bringing up obscure topics (nuclear physics, for example).

[imperfect_cupcake]

*hand up, really high*

Miss?! Miss!! TL1 and Randrum are chatting Bullocks

[TL1]

*hand up, really high*

Miss?! Miss!! TL1 and Randrum are chatting Bullocks

LOL!!!!!
What?

[randrum]

*hand up, really high*

Miss?! Miss!! TL1 and Randrum are chatting Bullocks

Haha. We'll have to agree to disagree on that.

[ravfem]

I don't flirt, generally. But i love interacting with people, especially joking around and giving (sincere) compliments and occasionally that gets mistaken as flirting. The only time it's been a true problem is when someone gets jealous over it. But...that's a good sign that i'm not going to be a good match with said person...so it all works out i guess.

:eatinghersheybar:

[Lyte]

For me it's primarily some playful banter. I enjoy flirting very much ... particularly with someone who has a quick wit. Flirting that causes her or me to smile or laugh is the best. :)

[Glenn]

il mio cuore e stato conquistato da qualcuno...io veramente adoro.

[legally_b10nde]

IMO, flirting starts with eye contacts, it shows how much he or she's interested in you. Psychology Today states that your eyes are the window to your soul.

"Psychologists consider pupil dilation to be an honest cue to sexual or social interest. That’s because pupil size isn’t under your voluntary control. Let’s say you’re trying to fake interest as your coworker recounts every play in his weekend golf game. You can force a smile. You might even remember to crinkle the corners of your eyes, to make that smile look real. But your tiny pupils will reveal your lack of interest."

Once I'm interested in the person, I find myself curling my hair playfully or make subtle touch on hand or shoulder.

[Lyte]

If you're close enough to note pupil dilation, you've passed flirting. ;)

[~ocean]

flirting is very seductive ~

[legally_b10nde]

If you're close enough to note pupil dilation, you've passed flirting. ;)

If you're close enough to note pupil dilation, you got my undivided attention