The mortuary thread

[Andrew, Jr.]

I know that I am not the only one fascinated by death. I am. Things that are curious to me are cremation, caskets, mortuary stuff, embalming, and so on.

Please feel free to post your thoughts and ideas here.

Namaste,
Andrew

[Apocalipstic]

When they cremate someone, what is left is called: Cremains

Cracks me up!

Then, if you are going to bury said cremains, you have to have the cremains filled urn buried in a mini vault. Which kind of resemble the Ark of the Covenant.

Hope you are not angry, I find funereal trappings amusing. :)

[Andrew, Jr.]

No, I'm not mad at all. I just find it hysterical all the names of everything. I am not one for words, and what I find out is amuzing.

Did you know that after one is cremated, that the body (bones) that are left still whole-ish are broken up? I thought these would burn down to ash as well.

[Jett]

When they cremate someone, what is left is called: Cremains

Cracks me up!

Then, if you are going to bury said cremains, you have to have the cremains filled urn buried in a mini vault. Which kind of resemble the Ark of the Covenant.

Hope you are not angry, I find funereal trappings amusing.

Right "cremains"... that kinda cracks me up too.

I wasn't too sure that was correct but when calling to get a niche for my mom I had to use it.

I was like... "I need a spot for my mom's... umm... cremains?" She was like "Oh is she passed on?"... I'm like WTH? Of course she's passed on, why the hell else would she be cremains?

To top that off she's like "would you like to stay for the placement?"... I said "Well yeah I would think so." and she's like... "Well I ask because we have to take her out of the box because the box won't fit..."

(again WTH?)...

..."so we have to kind of squeeze the bag into the hole... "

:eek:

WTH? I'm thinking like well no, we probably rather not see that but I think we'd have to hang out just to make sure they didn't put her in a wonder bread bag and hide her in the wall... I mean for cripes sake.

Anyway, yep "cremains"... (and yep I placed her somewhere else).

[Queerasfck]

Six Feet Under (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six_Feet_Under_(TV_series))was a great show.

http://www.atunn.com/blog/uploads/six-feet-under.png

[Andrew, Jr.]

What are shadow people? I have only seen them out of the corner of my eye, and only at my last job.

[little man]

reposted 'cause i fuckered up my edit. so, no editing.

Cremating at the optimum temperature (1400-1800 degrees), the average weighted remains takes 2 to 2 1/2 hours

[Apocalipstic]

No, I'm not mad at all. I just find it hysterical all the names of everything. I am not one for words, and what I find out is amuzing.

Did you know that after one is cremated, that the body (bones) that are left still whole-ish are broken up? I thought these would burn down to ash as well.

I thought it mostly burned too, I wanted to look at my Father's cremains, but the funeral home dude found us trying to open the urn and said he had just glued it shut!

Right "cremains"... that kinda cracks me up too.

I wasn't too sure that was correct but when calling to get a niche for my mom I had to use it.

I was like... "I need a spot for my mom's... umm... cremains?" She was like "Oh is she passed on?"... I'm like WTH? Of course she's passed on, why the hell else would she be cremains?

To top that off she's like "would you like to stay for the placement?"... I said "Well yeah I would think so." and she's like... "Well I ask because we have to take her out of the box because the box won't fit..."

(again WTH?)...

..."so we have to kind of squeeze the bag into the hole... "

:eek:

WTH? I'm thinking like well no, we probably rather not see that but I think we'd have to hang out just to make sure they didn't put her in a wonder bread bag and hide her in the wall... I mean for cripes sake.

Anyway, yep "cremains"... (and yep I placed her somewhere else).

Ha, no, she is still alive. WTH indeed! :freak:
Its kind of a heavy plastic bag with a seal with a number on it. I did not know they did not put the urn or box in the wall niche.

Great story!


Six Feet Under (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six_Feet_Under_(TV_series))was a great show.




It was a wonderful show, I especially liked when they showed actual funerals.

[Apocalipstic]

Well, no secrets here.

Oak Casket in the garage ... check
Embalming kit from the 1920s in the hall closet... check
( I keep the bottles of embalming fluid in the garage )
Urns in the library... um, not so much any more, damn shadow people are obsessed with them so they are out on the back porch.

Had to sell my 1972 Cadillac Hearse, the gas was killing me. :rofl:

Great thread Andrew :pipe:

Urns on the back porch, I see you are fitting right in to the South! :)

I always wanted a hearse!

Once, (not at band camp) I saw a convertible hearse in Detroit, I almost wrecked my car laughing!

[Andrew, Jr.]

Six Feet Under is still one of my favorite shows. It goes right up there next to the Sopranos, my most favorite show evah.

I went to a funeral home once with my Sunday School group. It was so cool. We spent most of our time in the embalming section. It was just overwhelming. And at the time, I think we were in 4th grade. I do believe that the younger you are, the more prone you are to spirits.

[Ms. Tabitha]

Hey Andrew great thread!

YouTube- The Process of Modern Day Cremation Video 1 of 2

YouTube- The Process of Modern Day Cremation Video 2 of 2


I have dealt with death on so many different levels due to my career EMS and in the ER with traumatic and natural causes.
My A&P class had very little textbook use. Cadaver's were issued to us after the medical students finished with them.
To this day I still cannot stand the smell of mentholatum.

:cheesy:

[Dean Thoreau]

I told the wife when I die...give every part of me away you can give away...Her response was..and what do I do with the leftovers?...........my reply was "surprise me!"

People seem to to feel we need to do some very expensive ritualistic things regarding death and said memorializing of the cremains, remains...
First embalming is not required....why would anyone opt to put more chemicals into the earth? and who the hell needs to dig u up in 40 years to see if your embalming has kpet you looking like what? dead?

Then there are the " underground cement vaults" you can buy one for 250 dollars that is not very pretty looking or you can spend 850 dollars on one that "is sealed and guaranted leak proof" Ok so my question was...So how am I gonna now if it leaks or not? The deceased going to call me and complain?

Then there are the caskets.....wood is more expensive...metal is cheaper..fiberboard....is the cheapest.......but not very pretty.....and once again...my response is...."And who is it exactly that is mourning the death of this person do we need to impress? And here we go with the "sealing issue" the more expensive ones are air tight......well goodness yes lets get one fo those..dont want the deceased getting a breath of air now do we "rme"

and then the cushioning inside the casket......cracks me up will the deceased actually ummm get an ache in his back if only laying on a 1/2 inch cushion instead of a 2 inch one?



Now the gross part to me is what funeral people do to make the body look "presentable" ping pong balls where they eyeballs are....super glue the eyes shut (no they dont naturally close) superglue the mouth shut....cotton filled mouths to maintain the "natural facial features" makeup so u cant see the ....loss of color since all the blood has now followed the direction of gravity.....and numerous other grossies..and I have to pay to have thsi done to a loved one for what reason?

So when people come tothe viewing....they can say "He/she looks good" No he/she looks dead...and that is ok cause he/she is!
Never have understood why people say some of the dumbest things at a viewing:
"he/she looks good...compared to what? How the person looked when they were alive?

"he/she has never looked better" better than what?

"He/she looks so peaceful"................duhhhhhhh (did they think the body would be having a bad dream? or maybe i should have had the funeral people make the deceaseds face look like "the scream"





And when i die and u bury whats left... put these simple word on a piece of stone to remember me:

Dean Thoreau
born yes died yes
at last he sleeps alone! :rainsing:

[Kimbo]

Back in the nursing days I was on the Code team--I've seen a lot of death. One time we pronounced an elderly woman, she was taken to the morgue, when I came in the next morning she was in the ICU. The funeral home people found her taking shallow breaths. That kind of freaked me out!

I've seen many autopsies, I'm fascinated by the body.

[Unndunn]

I don't want to rain on anyone's parade, but I felt devastated when I saw this thread. I come to this site to escape the pain I'm going through over losing my mother to cancer four months ago and losing my father in a horrible, tragic accident almost three years ago. It's Christmas and all I can think about is that this is the first Christmas with both of my parents gone.

I understand that these are my issues, and after I post this I'll make a polite exit out of this thread. However, I am posting because I know I can't be the only person who felt hurt and upset upon seeing it. I've been a nurse for 22 years and understand gallows humor and natural curiousity about death. I've seen plenty of dead bodies firsthand, but right now I can't forget that most recently it was my mother that I was sitting with while she gasped and took her last breath.

I just hope that people on this site, and specifically in this thread remember that things that don't bother us at a certain point in time might be triggers for other members.

thanks for reading,
unn

[Jett]

Unn first I'll say I'm very sorry for your loss, I lost my mom last year so I do have some idea what you're going through.

Death is a very touchy subject, taboo even to some... and we all deal with it differently... I don't think this thread is all about gallows humor. For me the story I told was pretty much a very painful true experiance that I was able to finally kind of laugh about here and thus let go of some of that pain.

As I said we all deal with things differently...

Anyway Andrew started a "Grieving" thread that's been helpful to me and perhaps you may find some solice among those going through or having gone through similar things as yourself.

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=80 (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=80)

I wish you peace
Metro

[T4Texas]

We have a great place here in Houston called the National Museum of Funeral History. It's a museum by the industry dedicated to the industry. I've been there a couple of times and what impressed me is that it's very well put together, tasteful and chock full of the most interesting things that relate to the industry. Among the things they have are small paper things, like advertisements, obituaries of famous people, and funeral home giveaways...a full mockup of a 1930's embalming room with all the equipment...a variety of caskets (antique) including a triple sized one that was specially made...and my personal favorites the hearses. They have not only vintage horse drawn hearses but about twenty motorized ones dating from the 1920's to the 1950's, all in like new condition. For car buffs its worth the trip just to see those. They have a website, but my link is not working so just punch in National Museum of Funeral History. Its a cool place, interesting and educational.

[Ms. Tabitha]

We have a great place here in Houston called the National Museum of Funeral History. It's a museum by the industry dedicated to the industry. I've been there a couple of times and what impressed me is that it's very well put together, tasteful and chock full of the most interesting things that relate to the industry. Among the things they have are small paper things, like advertisements, obituaries of famous people, and funeral home giveaways...a full mockup of a 1930's embalming room with all the equipment...a variety of caskets (antique) including a triple sized one that was specially made...and my personal favorites the hearses. They have not only vintage horse drawn hearses but about twenty motorized ones dating from the 1920's to the 1950's, all in like new condition. For car buffs its worth the trip just to see those. They have a website, but my link is not working so just punch in National Museum of Funeral History. Its a cool place, interesting and educational.



http://www.nmfh.org/
I agree, the place is amazing.

[Apocalipstic]

Unn,

So sorry this thread is hurtful to you.

I think all of us have experienced deep loss. My Mother died when I was 13 and we moved to the US the same week with her casket on the plane with us and my Dad died 11 months ago.

I have always been surrounded by death and I have chosen to look at the amusing parts.

We all process differently, and this is how I do. I hope that we can agree to disagree and just stay on different threads on this one subject.

In all respect!

Jen

[Apocalipstic]

OK, so the people from the funeral home where we had my father's funeral called this week, they want me to buy a casket and plan my own funeral.

Not the call I was wanting...:eatinghersheybar:

I guess since Walmart now carries caskets, they are having to beat the bushes to find victims? clients? what would one call it?

[WILDCAT]

OK, so the people from the funeral home where we had my father's funeral called this week, they want me to buy a casket and plan my own funeral.

Not the call I was wanting...:eatinghersheybar:

I guess since Walmart now carries caskets, they are having to beat the bushes to find victims? clients? what would one call it?

See Walmart "customer" service department: Bored to death complaints. (I guess?)

Other than a few funny lines, some sad stories - this thread is SPOOKY to me.

I do NOT want preservatives pumped into me. That seems insane to me and oh, so non-organic!! (Delaying the natural "process".) And I know how the blood draining is done and the doll dress up stuff. ICK!!! Shudder!

Part of my hospice training was to go into the bowels of a funeral home and see the "goings on". Well, not an actual... the equipment and full explanation.

I want cremated, but am deathly afraid of fires. (Seriously, now folks.) What if I am not dead? And the fire seems MUCH too hot.

So, I would have to have a "quickie" funeral. I think by law without the embalming, for obvious reasons you must "move" quickly with the service - if you are having one. Maybe just a memorial (?)

I did LOVE "Six Feet Under". That was a great show. I am NOT a fan of death and dying though.

Well, on that note: Everyone have a very lovely day. No slipping on the ice! (That is what killed the Atkins Diet guy!) Hmmmm, don't recall that as a death on my Six Feet show - come to think of it.

:rose:

WILDCAT

[Apocalipstic]

See Walmart "customer" service department: Bored to death complaints. (I guess?)

Other than a few funny lines, some sad stories - this thread is SPOOKY to me.

I do NOT want preservatives pumped into me. That seems insane to me and oh, so non-organic!! (Delaying the natural "process".) And I know how the blood draining is done and the doll dress up stuff. ICK!!! Shudder!

Part of my hospice training was to go into the bowels of a funeral home and see the "goings on". Well, not an actual... the equipment and full explanation.

I want cremated, but am deathly afraid of fires. (Seriously, now folks.) What if I am not dead? And the fire seems MUCH too hot.

So, I would have to have a "quickie" funeral. I think by law without the embalming, for obvious reasons you must "move" quickly with the service - if you are having one. Maybe just a memorial (?)

I did LOVE "Six Feet Under". That was a great show. I am NOT a fan of death and dying though.

Well, on that note: Everyone have a very lovely day. No slipping on the ice! (That is what killed the Atkins Diet guy!) Hmmmm, don't recall that as a death on my Six Feet show - come to think of it.

:rose:

WILDCAT

I am torn too. I recently had to decide so my final wishes could be placed in my will. I chose creation, but I am also very afraid of fires and of still being alive when it happens. I guess creation seems better than embalming fluid?

What about if one is buried then years later a neighborhood is built on the graveyard like in Poltergeist? Eeek.

I know, I am morbid.

[MizzSabra]

No funeral for me, thanks. Just a big ass wake with bagpipes, drinking and pot smoking.....oh and some food. I'm a chef, better be good food.

I have prepaid the Neptune Society to come pick up my corpse after I have died and cremate me. My kids know what to do with the ashes. :)

[Apocalipstic]

No funeral for me, thanks. Just a big ass wake with bagpipes, drinking and pot smoking.....oh and some food. I'm a chef, better be good food.

I have prepaid the Neptune Society to come pick up my corpse after I have died and cremate me. My kids know what to do with the ashes. :)

Bagpipes are wonderful!

I have always wanted someone to sing "I am the Walrus" at my funeral.

I have never heard of the Neptune Society, must look up.

[MizzSabra]

Bagpipes are wonderful!

I have always wanted someone to sing "I am the Walrus" at my funeral.

I have never heard of the Neptune Society, must look up.

http://www.neptunesociety.com/

If you live in CA, go here: http://www.neptune-society.com/

Bagpipes playing Amazing Grace. :)

[Cyclopea]

See Walmart "customer" service department: Bored to death complaints. (I guess?)
WILDCAT

:superfunny:
Ha!

[theoddz]

OK, so the people from the funeral home where we had my father's funeral called this week, they want me to buy a casket and plan my own funeral.

Not the call I was wanting...:eatinghersheybar:

I guess since Walmart now carries caskets, they are having to beat the bushes to find victims? clients? what would one call it?

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=12569361&sourceid=1500000000000003260370&ci_src=14110944&ci_sku=12569361

I think what I find most disturbing is that little button alongside the item that says "Add to Cart". :shocking:

~Theo~ :bunchflowers:

[Dean Thoreau]

I am sorry for your loss unndunn....
Unfortunately every person alive will one day loose someone they love...it is a fact of life. I am sorry you chose to read this thread considering your recent losses. and grief.

Sometimes for some people laughing at death and the rituals of death is a way to accept the realities of the fact that it faces allof us as well as at least in my case if i stop laughing i will curl up in a ball and give up...

In my short lifetime I have buried more friends than I can count....they have quilts on a thing called the AIDS quilt.

In my short lifetime I have buried...3 children...my father, my uncles, my aunts, my cousin..but such is life and death....

We humans are very controlling people..we like to control everything...but we can not control death,,,nor control when it comes...

So I laugh,,i laugh at death square in the face and say...go ahead I am not afraid of you.
I laugh at the insane customs that we practice regarding a body...cause if I did not it would scare me

I laugh and poke fun at funeral directors cause they always have cold hands....and i laugh at the idea of going to walmart and asking for the hereafter section.....

I can see the walmart funeral home....with the walmart greeter passing out little yellow sad faces for you to wear...and saying welcome to walmart have a sad mourning day .....
i can see people heading to the walmart funeral stopping first to pick up a bottle of milke..or check out the new fishing poes...or grab a box of twinkies for the long ride to the cemetary....

I can see kmart trying to compete with walmart and having a blue light special on embalming fluid.........people pusing their carts with a casket in the cart hurrying ot the embalming department....

Am I irreverant..damn right I am...

am I disrespectful of the dead? No, cause every person on this planet that has ever died has been loved by someone...and every person on this planet that has ever lived ..died knowing someone loved them....at one time in their life....and that is the only thing that matters in the greater scheme of things!

:sermon: I need to go to kmart now

[Medusa]

Unn, Im sorry for your loss. I know that it is difficult and often triggery to read about the things in this conversation when things are so raw for you. I hope you find some peace.

I also know that Andrew wasnt trying to trigger anyone and started this thread from a place of analysis rather than from morbid laughter.

With that said, I have been fascinated with the process of life and death since I was a child. I was even taken to the school counselor when I was in the 4th grade because my teacher was having career day and was horrified when I told her I wanted to be a Funeral Director.

That urge has never gone away and I am, for the third time in my life, seriously contemplating going to Mortuary school.

We also have an extensive collection of items related to the human (and animal) death experience. We have a 6-foot oak casket in our garage. Trocar needles used in embalming, urns, toe tags, internment orders, freezer guages, books, magazines, even several human teeth and finger bones. Most people who come to our home have a pretty visceral reaction to seeing this stuff displayed. Many are grossed out. Many are disturbed. Some find it interesting.

Most people assume that I grew up in a funeral home or something because I am so normalized to the death process. I have worked in several hospitals and seen, touched, and handled several dead bodies, including many, many children. I worked in the Cancer unit at a children's hospital here in Arkansas and cared for and tended to the bodies of more children than I can count and until you have cradled the lifeless body of a 6-week-old infant who has died from Leukemia, you dont really grasp the level of love and care that must go into treating people's bodies with respect when they die.
I think that is my biggest draw, the humanity of it. I have witnessed Mothers who wanted to be taken when their children died. I have witnessed children who were glad to be going. I have witnessed people's final words and breaths. Death is a very, very humbling experience.
I, for one, am glad that there are people who are willing to be part of this process. Helping prepare and care for the bodies of those who have gone on.

I have made my wishes known to Jack for when I die. I hope that everyone has a big party with lots of merriment and story-telling. I want to be cremated and I dont care what happens to the ashes. I have had an amazing life thus far. Dont get me wrong, Im not ready to go anywhere just yet because Im having such a great time but if I died tomorrow, I would have accomplished much of what I have wanted to accomplish in this life. I have broken the cycle of physical abuse that has been generationally entrenched in my family. I broke my own cycle of addiction. I have learned to live an authentic life. I have stopped being afraid. I have laughed more in my life than most people can imagine. I have made some amazing friends. I have loved and been loved in return.
There isnt anything more magical than that to me.

[NotAnAverageGuy]

I am being burned to a crisp ala crispy critter ( me and my bestie say this), T4T is right, the museum here in Houston is awesome, I think I need to pay a visit soon.

I don't deal well with death but have always been fascinated by the jobs of the funeral home, from the director down to the makeup artist.

There was a show on tv, based in Cali, I can't remember the name but it was a family who ran it and it showed their drama and their feelings in dealing with the business and showed parts of the business that is rarely seen in real life.

[Cyclopea]

My fantasy is to have one of the amazing hand-carved Ghanian representational coffins.
Perhaps a giant bird or fish.
Actually I'd love to have a bunch of them sitting around the house...!
They are extraordinarily beautiful to me.
YouTube- Ghana Coffins - Ghana

[Apocalipstic]

Drive through wakes. :) at Walmart next to the florals.

I used to want to open a funeral home, bar and grill. :)
rad coffins, really cool piped in music. A gothic room.

Medusa, we have skulls all over the living room! Real animal ones on the mantlepiece.

[Andrew, Jr.]

I want to be creamated and buried at sea. But we will see how things go. :cigar:

[Words]

Traditional Islamic burial for me, if possible.

Body washed then put in a shroud and buried, if possible, the same day. I'd like to be buried with my wedding ring but need to check if it's allowed. I hope it is. (If it isn't, then I think I'll have it written into my will that I want B. to wear it as a cock ring once I'm gone. Try explaining that to a new lover...ha!)

Words

[T4Texas]

I plan for a traditional burial. I already have a plot and a headstone actually. Some years back, my ex's mom passed away and left 6 spaces. My gay guy pals bought two and I got one so we went about putting up a headstone with all our names on it. The boys both died of HIV in the 90's and are already there holding my place for me, so I look forward to hopefully seeing them one day. Like Dean, I also lost many friends in the 80's/90's from HIV. Some of them are on the Quilt too. Death is a lot of things to a lot of people. It can be something feared or embraced. The important thing is that when someone passes away, you must always remember them by telling the stories about them, those good and bad times, or just some stupid thing they did that made you laugh. It keeps them alive in your heart and the hearts of those that loved them.

[Unndunn]

Unn, Im sorry for your loss. I know that it is difficult and often triggery to read about the things in this conversation when things are so raw for you. I hope you find some peace.

I also know that Andrew wasnt trying to trigger anyone and started this thread from a place of analysis rather than from morbid laughter.



I just happened to come across this thread when I was feeling extremely raw and had a strong reaction to it. I felt like I needed to say something, and I'm glad that I did because I got some really sweet messages and rep comments. My family is Irish. We don't cry, especially at wakes and funerals; we laugh and remember the good times. Most of the time I can do that. This Christmas just seems to be hitting me hard.

My father had mentioned to us a few months before he died that he didn't want "a bunch of phonies crying crocodile tears over my dead body at a wake" and that he wanted to be cremated, so we had him cremated and then had a funeral mass at the Catholic Church my parents belonged to. (He wasn't referring to family members being "phonies" just old coworkers, etc. that would "show up out of the woodwork"). We had a reception in the church hall afterward with tons of food and drink. Afterward, my mother who was still in shock over dad's death (he died in an accident at home, she found his body) said "I want the exact same thing when I die, but please order a little less food-- we had too many leftovers" lol We teased her for quite a while about that, and it always made her smile. When she died in August of this year we made the plans accordingly and orderd a little less food. It was so like my mother to say that and I still smile when I think of it. Their ashes are here in the house that my father built and that's where they'll stay.

My brothers and I have all talked about what we want when we die. I would like to be cremated, and to be late for my own funeral, since so many people over the years have told me that I would be.

Thanks again for being so understanding,
Unn

[Andrew, Jr.]

I find death so strange. It is not something that is final, but a rebirth. We are just passing thru.

I endured the loss of my younger brother's suicide, the loss of my sister & Godfather from cancer, and the loss of so many from HIV/AIDS. I think of them having a huge party, and just waiting for us to join them. The hard part is for us left behind. We have to find the motive, and joy back in living.

[Ms. Tabitha]

I know for some, talking about death is very uncomfortable and to some people morbid. These are choices that unfortunately we will all have to decide one day. Burial or cremation. Wake or funeral. Embalming or not. Being "laid" to rest, either in the ground or the wall. Keeping the Urn or spreading the ashes. Having a traditional funeral or having a Eco funeral.

Death is a sweet release of pain and suffering for those who endured a life of agony or a painful struggle with disease. It's untimely to say the least, no matter who they are. It can be peaceful and sometimes its traumatic. It can be accidental or intentional. Either way, the ones that are left behind the ones that suffer and grieve.

My opinion. Funerals are for the living, not the dead. The viewing of a loved one. The pomp and circumstance during the funeral, the dinners and gatherings that follow are for the family and friends to find closure. The person lying in the casket has no idea what is happening. Its just a body, a shell so to speak. The remains of whom that person was, their soul, their spirit, has moved on.

Each and every person who comes into our lives, be it our friends, those who we briefly meet on our daily routine or the ones that we call family. Our experience with them, good, bad or indifferent makes up a small part of who we are. We share the stories, have a laugh, say "remember when" and cherish the memories..... and that part of them, that touched our lives will always live on.

I have always told my children. Death is a natural bodily function, just like farting. It's going to happen. We cannot stop it and we cannot plan where or when it will happen. Enjoy life to its fullest. Live each day as it were your last. Never go to bed angry and always say "I love you" to those you hold dear to your heart. We are never promised a tomorrow.

Just my .02 cents!

:coffee:




http://living.morethan.com/2009/08/07/cardboard-coffins-woodland-burials-what-makes-a-green-funeral/

[Pixie]

I am at peace with death. Not to sound morbid but we are born to live, and live to die...and for some we die to be born again.

I don't want a funeral. I have done so many different things and met so many people for different reasons and in different ways that I would just want a "party" for them all to meet. I want to be cremated and my ashes to be thrown off a mountain.....so that even in death I would accomplish something....(concurring my fear of falling)

[Andrew, Jr.]

Pixie,

Where did you come up with your last wishes? I think that is wonderful. I do believe that we are born to live and die. Some for a long time, and some for a short time. We each have a mission. Once completed, we move on. It is the ebb and flow of life.

Peace.

[Pixie]

Pixie,

Where did you come up with your last wishes? I think that is wonderful. I do believe that we are born to live and die. Some for a long time, and some for a short time. We each have a mission. Once completed, we move on. It is the ebb and flow of life.

Peace.


Andrew-

I agree!

Um, honestly I don't really know. It has just always been something that I've wanted. The "party" thing came from the different sides of me brought out in full force in my crazy life. I want my colorguard people that got to see my performance side, get to meet the bowling people that got to see my competitive side, college friends showing my procrastinator/cheapfixeruper/artistic/broke side, and all my random friends sharing my pixie side....lol

as I ramble

as for the mountain thing...I was doing a ropes course and climbed up the pole for the "leap of faith", and as i stood there frozen, fighting my fear, and slowly losing.... I knew that this wasn't my time to jump....

:)

[IrishGrrl]

I knew we had the funeral museum here, but I"ve never been and would love to. Next time Pixie comes for a visit..I"m taking her there!!! LOL

[Andrew, Jr.]

I find death and funerals fascinating. Every culture has a different take on the rituals of buring the dead. Even in the military, they have their own set of rites. And the same goes for the religious like when the Pope died.

[Queerasfck]

My last wishes. My organs will be donated and my body cremated. A small amount of my remains will be placed in a tiny bottle which apretty (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/member.php?u=76) will have made into a charm to wear around her neck. From a helicopter the rest of my ashes will then be scattered by my lady over Heinz Field so that I can forever be linked with my team, the Steelers. The laws on spreading ashes varies from state to state. A permit may be required.

[Cyclopea]

My last wishes. My organs will be donated and my body cremated. A small amount of my remains will be placed in a tiny bottle which apretty (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/member.php?u=76) will have made into a charm to wear around her neck. From a helicopter the rest of my ashes will then be scattered by my lady over Heinz Field so that I can forever be linked with my team, the Steelers. The laws on spreading ashes varies from state to state. A permit may be required.

I was responding to congratulate you on your excellent decision to donate your organs.:thumbsup:

Then I started thinking how funny it would be for the helicopter to be surrounded by homeland security after being observed dumping white powder all over the stadium-lol. Yes, perhaps a permit would be best!
:giggle:

[la_la]

Did you know...

As part of your will/living will you will be asked if you want your body :
A. Buried
B. Cremated

I responded with C. Neither A or B appeal to me and I am awaiting a better option.

My lawyer was not amused and stated that I am voiding my will with this declaration as when the time came my body would lie in probate (years) until my true wishes were decided.

Lawyers have no sense of humor and no, I never changed it.

Peace

[Andrew, Jr.]

La_La,

What about freezing your body?

[la_la]

La_La,

What about freezing your body?

Hey Andrew,

Not an option on a standard will.

Peace

[Andrew, Jr.]

Oh, ok. :bellydancer:

[Dean Thoreau]

ok read the disclaimer...it is dark comedy...
" A Field guide to burying your parents "

It is comic fiction about the hawkes family who needs to do the unthinkable...and it travels along with them in this act..the ups the downs the downright outrageous....and unbeleivable...
author Liza Palmer




Ok just some food for thought....last wishes can not be in wills,,wills by the time they are found, probated, etc are usually long after the ummm decesed body has been disposed of.

Best thing to do if u want certain things doen is do prearrangement and sign the legal documentation entrusting a Power of Atty for the final wishes to someone u trust...(course it doent matter cause not like u will know)


I urge people to make their own arrangmentsnot to make sure u get what u want..but mainly to make it a little easier on the survivors. My father died very suddenly and not only did we have the shock of his loss to deal with,,,we had to in that shock,,pick out a coffin, a burial site, and all the stuff that goes with it. For years the only membry i had of my fathers funeral was the "casket shopping room" and my brother, mother and i looking at ourselves when the Funeral director mentioned that the one he was pointing to had 3 inches of padding in the mattress...we all looked at each other and could only nod ...thank goodness my uncle stepped in and said...lets look over here....and guided us to more appropriate areas of concern..and told the director we were not interested in hermeitclly sealed, fire resistant, rust resistant, mildew resistant....options. :deal:

[Andrew, Jr.]

Dean,

You are so right about your post. Make sure everything you want is written down, and you tell someone about it. And get it notorized. Just cover your ass because nobody else will. Trust me.

[BornBronson]

I have always had a deep fascination with human body decomposition.As a matter of fact right up until my late 30's I thought about donating my remains to one of those body farms.That are finding someone to claim them after my death and take the body home and sit 'me' in a chair out in the garage somewhere and watch me...rot.*snort*Now days I don't care what they do to my remains after i'm dead.


Like my mother once said.Bring me flowers NOW!,and not after i'm dead and buried.

[FR]

-- i have heard that even after u go -u still fart-imagine that! don't know how long. wonder if its like that if a tree falls in the forest thing?

[Andrew, Jr.]

As your body starts to decompose, the internal gases will build up, and then come out out the orafaces (sp?). It happens to all human beings, young and old alike.

Right now I am waiting for the toxicology report back on my friend's aunt who was murdered. It should be interesting. The cornoner said that even after the autopsy, the blood tests & tissue testing can take up to 3 months or more for the results to come back. Does anyone know anything about this kind of testing? I would love to know more.


:cowboy:

[Andrew, Jr.]

Anything new here? I find this topic so fascinating. :cheer:

[Cyclopea]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/04/28/funeral-home-poses-shooti_n_555556.html

[Andrew, Jr.]

Anything new?


:party:

[canadianmusician]

OK, so the people from the funeral home where we had my father's funeral called this week, they want me to buy a casket and plan my own funeral.

Not the call I was wanting...:eatinghersheybar:

I guess since Walmart now carries caskets, they are having to beat the bushes to find victims? clients? what would one call it?

Apocalipstic...I'm so sorry to hear that happened. That's really tacky and not professional. Did you report them to the local funeral directors assc? Embalmers and Directors are all licenced by provincial/state boards.

It's fine to advertise....I mean, a funeral home is a business and there are costs associated but I would NEVER call up the family of someone who's passed away asking them to buy a pre-plan. My fear is that it would retraumatize the family.

The best way to get business is to have reasonable costs, make sure the family gets what they want, and it's a profession where it's just a given that you'll go out of your way in some respects. It really upsets me that the funeral home called you and asked you to buy a pre-plan. They should have called to see how you were doing.

[canadianmusician]

I'm about to start a Foundations course so I can become an Embalmer & Funeral Directors apprentice. I've done quite a bit of research and spoken to other embalmers. The embalming process is so much more than I thought it was....some people find it gruesome. I find it fascinating....

Bu tmost of all, I want to make sure the family can see thier loved one the way they remembered them from when they were well, if possible. There's hours of reconstruction that can take lpace depending on cause of death.

If people want to donate thier body to science/frozen, they need to be embalmed to preserve the body because it begins to decompose almost immediately.

I've been considering donating my body to Body Worlds for plastination.