Neurodiversity

[Andrew, Jr.]

Belle,

I think if others can understand and be patient with those who have neuro. issues, then they will "see" a whole new perspective. Most just don't want to "waste their time". I know - I have had it happen to me more times than I can count on 1 hand.

[Cyclopea]

http://www.timothyhorrigan.com/documents/unicru-personality-test.answer-key.html

[Andrew, Jr.]

Cyclopea,

I am not understanding who this Timothy Horrigan is. Is this a book or a writer? Can you please shed some light on this person or book for me?

Thanks,
Andrew

[JazzGirl]

Hi. I, too, am an AT. I am an Aspie who has epilepsy and also Tourette Syndrome. Argh, this is hard to do. My epilepsy is mostly under control. My Tourette's is not. I have a very high IQ. No, I don't scream, yell, swear. I do have vocal and physical tics though. I make unusual sounds I cannot replicate purposely. I look as if I am dancing seated in a chair sometimes and it is totally beyond my control. I try desperately to control all of my tics but when I do they are made far worse than if I had not done so.

I have found, I still have little recognition of facial expressions and do not always recognize, correctly, the emotions of others, either facially and sometimes vocally unless it is a very basic emotional reaction. I am, however, empathic and do have compassion. As I get older, I find I am much more able to "appear normal" without trying so hard. I have come to the place in my life where I really don't give a rat's a** whether others find me NT or not.

I do hear from others, I am open, refreshingly honest, without guise or guile, an innocent, childlike, the glass is half full girl and I would wonder, many years ago, WHY people said those things. I asked. The answers were varied but most were " because you are so wonderfully different. I love your perspectives and the fact that you cannot play mind games. Or Wow, you are able to look at yourself from your own perspective, the perspective of the other person involved and also as if you were a third individual who was simply looking on.

I do not understand vague references. If a word has more than one meaning, I become confused in conversation (so I ask or tell people this.), If a question can have more than one answer I get the RCA dog look. Geez, Not easily confused am I? My teenaged son taught me sarcasm, but only the self deprecating type. I still find 99% of sarcasm, dry humor, any kind of subtley goes right over my head. My facial expressions or even tone of voice do not match at times to my inner emotions. I cannot lie. I spit out the truth even if it means I am in trouble or perceive I could be in trouble IF I perceive it , lol.
* I would suck as a criminal * lol.

I, like others, perseverate on things that hold my interest, but in a much less intense manner than when younger. I now recognize conversational cues much more often and quickly. Again, thanks to my teenaged son. My poor son. But he tells me NO Mom, your son with an advantage cuz I got you as a Mom. I'm rambling. I'll be back later. Time to hide out. I'm feeling overly exposed but needed to be honest.

I read this thread and wanted to introduce myself.
Jazzie

[Liam]

I read this thread and wanted to introduce myself.
Jazzie

Welcome to the thread, Jazzie, nice to meet you.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Hi and Welcome Jazzie. Glad you are here with us! :bouquet::thumbsup::happyjump:

[Cyclopea]

http://www.timothyhorrigan.com/documents/unicru-personality-test.answer-key.html


Cyclopea,

I am not understanding who this Timothy Horrigan is. Is this a book or a writer? Can you please shed some light on this person or book for me?

Thanks,
Andrew


The link is to the answer key to the Unicru personality test which is now utilized by most large employers to screen out/eliminate autistic and aspergers job applicants. I posted it as a helpful tool for anyone who wants to avoid being discriminated against during the job application process.

Here's another good related link: http://www.ehow.com/how_4446746_pass-preemployment-personality-test.html
But the one I posted above gives the actual answers.
:)

[violaine]

has anyone read this book, please?
- David Eastham, "Understand: Fifty Memowriter Poems"

the first link contains tremendous spectrum resources, and the second one involves a bit of fun:

http://autistscorner.blogspot.com/2010/03/autiebibliography.html

http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/synesthesia

mine was wired % 87 for creativity synesthesia ;) and came from this site:

http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/

http://faculty.washington.edu/chudler/syne.html

:bouquet:

[JazzGirl]

Thank you for the welcome everyone.

:formalbow:

[StoneFinn]

sometimes there's not a word or set of words. just a picture i cannot draw here. it's just about needing to be where someone else understands.

[katzietootle]

Pq8cuKPufUc
a 9 year old with autism learned to play piano by ear using only three notes but can play a whole song such as this (copied and pasted)
i dealt with this kid when he was still 2 and can't barely say A,E, when he still needs motivation with his sitting tolerance, has fleeting eye contact, cannot recognize letters,don't have imitation skills...and now...yeeba!!!im so proud of him... and everyone around him who gives him undying love and support...

[violaine]

[QUOTE=StoneFinn;97630]sometimes there's not a word or set of words. just a picture i cannot draw here. it's just about needing to be where someone else understands.

yes!

.

.

[Liam]

I've been thinking about this for some time, and I decided to put it out there to those on the spectrum. Did you have to learn, NOT to trust people?

[Andrew, Jr.]

Liam,

I do not know how to not to trust people. I trust everyone. Then when I get burned, I know what you mean. Otherwise the answer is no.

Now I try to be a forgiving man, and try to practice my faith. I try to always turn to my other cheek, and to always embrace everyone. No matter who or what they are. They are people and they require love above all things.

Andrew

[violaine]

[QUOTE=Liam;105023]I've been thinking about this for some time, and I decided to put it out there to those on the spectrum. Did you have to learn, NOT to trust people?

dear liam,

in a word- yes.

when i was a small child, and my family mentioned someone 'stealing' me, i'd say, 'don't worry, they'll bring me back in ten minutes!' do you think that i must have repeated what i overheard?

;)

acceptance is beautiful to know, and to be able to provide others. if an individual is wired to be naturally open, and then grows up with a lot of freedom to 'be', how does she know that not everyone else out there receives the same wiring/familial experiences?

it took me a long time to figure out! :hanging:


ways i learned to be more guarded around certain people fairly straightforward: i feel worse around them than i do otherwise, and more adds up in the negative column. sure, there are people [NT's], capable of detecting things sooner- and that's ohk! seeing roundly, i.e., often for me means taking the long road- with friend/co-worker/person of interest/family member, and while it's true, i may eventually be out of a friendship [that * i * thought existed], better to be out than remain stuck in one-sidedness.

on the other hand, a break just may be needed. it depends on the person, situation, and whether or not my bounce-back has been exhausted!

perils. pleasures. of AT wiring.

eta: it 'feels' worse being around them. emotionalising the patterns of undesirable behaviour. this happens after trying to make sense of the confusion, and then communicating questionable scenarios- intellectualising first and then going on how that is received. patterns and connections. it comes in stages- not all at once, like it may work for NT's.

[Liam]

Liam,

I do not know how to not to trust people. I trust everyone. Then when I get burned, I know what you mean. Otherwise the answer is no.

Now I try to be a forgiving man, and try to practice my faith. I try to always turn to my other cheek, and to always embrace everyone. No matter who or what they are. They are people and they require love above all things.

Andrew


I understand what you mean, Andrew, with the exception of a bump with my dentist, when I was four, I have pretty much always assumed people are kind and honest. However, my online experience has changed that, and I have learned not to be invested in people being honest, kind or even fair.



dear liam,

in a word- yes.

when i was a small child, and my family mentioned someone 'stealing' me, i'd say, 'don't worry, they'll bring me back in ten minutes!' do you think that i must have repeated what i overheard?

;)

acceptance is beautiful to know, and to be able to provide others. if an individual is wired to be naturally open, and then grows up with a lot of freedom to 'be', how does she know that not everyone else out there receives the same wiring/familial experiences?

it took me a long time to figure out! :hanging:


ways i learned to be more guarded around certain people fairly straightforward: i feel worse around them than i do otherwise, and more adds up in the negative column. sure, there are people [NT's], capable of detecting things sooner- and that's ohk! seeing roundly, i.e., often for me means taking the long road- with friend/co-worker/person of interest/family member, and while it's true, i may eventually be out of a friendship [that * i * thought existed], better to be out than remain stuck in one-sidedness.

on the other hand, a break just may be needed. it depends on the person, situation, and whether or not my bounce-back has been exhausted!

perils. pleasures. of AT wiring.

eta: it 'feels' worse being around them. emotionalising the patterns of undesirable behaviour. this happens after trying to make sense of the confusion, and then communicating questionable scenarios- intellectualising first and then going on how that is received. patterns and connections. it comes in stages- not all at once, like it may work for NT's.






Why on earth would anyone want to return you in ten minutes, Belle? That is a wonderful story of how we repeat what we hear, when we are kids.

Feelings, are so tricky, I don't think many NT folks understand how foreign they are, to many of us on the spectrum. It took a long time for me to understand what a stomach ache can mean for me. I've come to recognise that this means something is terribly off and it is not good. This unfamiliarity with feelings is definitely a two-edged sword, however I am grateful I am how I am.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Liam,

I posted the other day that I felt that everyone here was my family. And I had someone tell me this was a community, and not a family. It confuses me. I was rejected by my family, and abandon. So tell me what are we then?

[Ursy]

Liam,

I posted the other day that I felt that everyone here was my family. And I had someone tell me this was a community, and not a family. It confuses me. I was rejected by my family, and abandon. So tell me what are we then?


Aargh! That annoys me so much! I wouldn't presume to correct your interpretation of "family", even if I saw this place as "community"... or whatever else I wanted to call it.

Family and community and words like that can mean very different things to different people.


So tell me what are we then?


We are whatever you feel is right to call us, and nobody can tell you that you are wrong. Who can dictate what these kinds of things mean to another?

Hrumphy!

[Liam]

Liam,

I posted the other day that I felt that everyone here was my family. And I had someone tell me this was a community, and not a family. It confuses me. I was rejected by my family, and abandon. So tell me what are we then?


Andrew, I believe she was sharing that she makes a distinction between family and community, relative to this online community. That is her reality, and you are most certainly entitled to yours, which does not have to match up with anyone else's, in order for it to be valid.

I am proud to call you brother.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Liam,

I posted the other day that I felt that everyone here was my family. And I had someone tell me this was a community, and not a family. It confuses me. I was rejected by my family, and abandon. So tell me what are we then?



I believe I said

This is where we *differ*

How you choose to see anyone is solely up to you Andrew, I made that distinction clear.


Aargh! That annoys me so much! I wouldn't presume to correct your interpretation of "family", even if I saw this place as "community"... or whatever else I wanted to call it.

Family and community and words like that can mean very different things to different people.



We are whatever you feel is right to call us, and nobody can tell you that you are wrong. Who can dictate what these kinds of things mean to another?

Hrumphy!

I was not interpreting anything for Andrew I was posting from *my* Snow space and what family meant to *me*

I hope that makes sense.

Thanks Liam for correcting this..

[Ursy]

I believe I said

This is where we *differ*

How you choose to see anyone is solely up to you Andrew, I made that distinction clear.

I was not interpreting anything for Andrew I was posting from *my* Snow space and what family meant to *me*

I hope that makes sense.

Thanks Liam for correcting this..

Thanks for clarifying hon!
In that case I'm not hrumphing at you - but the people who do think that way (and there are peeps who still do, more's the pity).
xx

[Andrew, Jr.]

Lady Snow,

It is confusing to me. I love you as my sister. I talk to most everyone each day. I would think that you would love me as your brother. What is the difference between that love and being born by the same mother? I am not ref. to anything racial. I don't believe in that at all. My love is the same like I have for Urs or Madusa or anyone else.

In community and love of family how are they different then? I am lost.

Andrew

[The_Lady_Snow]

Lady Snow,

It is confusing to me. I love you as my sister. I talk to most everyone each day. I would think that you would love me as your brother. What is the difference between that love and being born by the same mother? I am not ref. to anything racial. I don't believe in that at all. My love is the same like I have for Urs or Madusa or anyone else.

In community and love of family how are they different then? I am lost.

Andrew



I would like to take this elsewhere Andrew out of respect to everyone in here, I have a boy who is Aspie, and he can pick up on energies and things that go out of wack, this to *me* feels to *heavy* in energy for myself and people in here who have *enough* going on with their extra senses.. I will copy and paste and find the Red Zone so I can address it properly..

[Andrew, Jr.]

Lady Snow,

It was just posted that you are dating Weatherboi, and that somehow this is being twisted around to mean something totally different than what I am saying. No. I am done.

I don't mean disrespect. I had no clue. I apologise yet again too have offended you and Weatherboi. I feel like a jackass.

Andrew

[Ursy]

There will always be misunderstandings... the trick is to move on.

Easier said than done! I don't know if it's an Aspie thing, but I berate myself when I am part of a misunderstanding. I was quite old when I realised that most others just shake it off and keep going (but I don't know if that's a neurotypical thing in particular).

It's a very painful part of my existence, especially as misunderstandings can happen relatively frequently when you're an Aspie, but I am working on it.

Do you think it's an Aspie thing? The berating oneself I mean. Oh, and the hanging on to stuff that is best let go? 'Cause that's something else I have to work on!

[christie]

There will always be misunderstandings... the trick is to move on.

Easier said than done! I don't know if it's an Aspie thing, but I berate myself when I am part of a misunderstanding. I was quite old when I realised that most others just shake it off and keep going (but I don't know if that's a neurotypical thing in particular).

It's a very painful part of my existence, especially as misunderstandings can happen relatively frequently when you're an Aspie, but I am working on it.

Do you think it's an Aspie thing? The berating oneself I mean. Oh, and the hanging on to stuff that is best let go? 'Cause that's something else I have to work on!

Urs -

My Aspie son doesn't berate himself. In fact, Bratboy has quite an opposite reaction in that he ALWAYS projects any blame/responsibility on others. Nothing is ever his fault. As a parent, I find this as equally difficult to navigate as the self berating. I "think" it would be easier to try and show him that he is not solely responsible for something rather than to try and show him that he does have responsibility in a situation.

We have NINE days of school left and if the last week has been an indicator, I would rather eat nails. He has decided that he doesn't need to go, that he can just repeat the 11th grade next year. :overreaction: He knows well enough that he will finish the school year, and to me, the frustration is that he spends so much time making the simplest of things so fucking difficult. I keep reminding him that he isnt 18, he doesnt live in a democracy and in most instances, he doesnt get to vote. LOL

[Andrew, Jr.]

Christie0918,

You are fortunate in that your son doesn't berate himself. I do. It's a trigger. Moving on is much easier said than done for me.

[Ursy]

Urs -

My Aspie son doesn't berate himself. In fact, Bratboy has quite an opposite reaction in that he ALWAYS projects any blame/responsibility on others. Nothing is ever his fault. As a parent, I find this as equally difficult to navigate as the self berating. I "think" it would be easier to try and show him that he is not solely responsible for something rather than to try and show him that he does have responsibility in a situation.

We have NINE days of school left and if the last week has been an indicator, I would rather eat nails. He has decided that he doesn't need to go, that he can just repeat the 11th grade next year. :overreaction: He knows well enough that he will finish the school year, and to me, the frustration is that he spends so much time making the simplest of things so fucking difficult. I keep reminding him that he isnt 18, he doesnt live in a democracy and in most instances, he doesnt get to vote. LOL

Actually now that you mention it, my dad (who we're quite sure is Aspie) is similar - he is never at fault. I guess it depends on the individual personality. I imagine that it might be tied to the "theory of mind" thing.

Anyway, I hope it all settles down for you and bratboy - they can be trying, for sure. Bek and I went through some bad times - but we're in a good place right now. May there be a good place waiting for you and bratboy soon! xx

[katzietootle]

someone help...
do anyone here knows how to manage visual stims?i dealt with verbal stims and other self stimulatory behaviours but i'm having a hard time managing visual stims...

[Andrew, Jr.]

Not a clue.

[Liam]

someone help...
do anyone here knows how to manage visual stims?i dealt with verbal stims and other self stimulatory behaviours but i'm having a hard time managing visual stims...

I practice energy tapping, and it helps me.

http://www.powells.com/biblio/1-9781572245556-0

[violaine]

" . . . I once watched a fairy-like child walking through the park on her tiptoes. She was probably nine or 10. She knew exactly what was supposed to happen at various times of the day but didn’t know the word for grass. Such fey unworldliness might indeed seem magical to some and threatening to others. . . "



http://carnalnation.com/content/55714/999/asperger-s-syndrome-sex

[christie]

This young man brought tears to my eyes - all three times I watched this. His performance was just brilliant.

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/H0ua3EZs06s&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/H0ua3EZs06s&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

[violaine]

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/08/is-sitting-while-autistic-a-crime.html

[Apocalipstic]

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/08/is-sitting-while-autistic-a-crime.html


Thank you for posting this. I hope a lot of people will read it.

It is frustrating police or no when behavior you have no control over is seen as being rude or mean or devious.

How many times I have to say the words "there is no hidden agenda".

I berate myself and appologize an incredible amount. My friends say it is annoying and I need to stop it. I am not even sure how. Especially today.

I am not understanding anything. I am spinning. My schedule is all weird I guess, C is at her Grandmother's and my dog of 15 years died a couple of weeks ago and the house feels so different.

Sorry and thank you!

xoxoxoxo

[violaine]

jen, i'm really sorry about the recent loss of your dog (f) losing a close family member is so difficult, and i hope that you will be gentle to yourself right now.

i also understand the feelings of frustration with the 'no hidden agenda' situation. repeat.repeat.repeat. there's more to write about this, and it gets very confusing to me too, so you're not alone!

do you think some of the police or not 'projection' of DA being 'mean, rude, and devious' simply stems from a lack of capacity [wiring] to even go deeper and/or to see outside of self, with compassion - in some, maybe it just isn't there ?

in that case, what do you do- keep apologising?

[suebee]

This (http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/04/24/spurrell-autism-apology-424.html)is a story similar to Violaine's: an eighteen year old autistic boy was picked up by the police and held in jail because they thought he was drunk. I think his real offense was "walking while autistic".

[christie]

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/08/is-sitting-while-autistic-a-crime.html

This (http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/04/24/spurrell-autism-apology-424.html)is a story similar to Violaine's: an eighteen year old autistic boy was picked up by the police and held in jail because they thought he was drunk. I think his real offense was "walking while autistic".


Belle and Sue -

Thank you both for posting these stories. I think that awareness training for our emergency responders and our law enforcement agencies is needed more than ever and I am encouraged at the number of agencies taking steps to do so.

There has recently been a new awareness site launched.

http://awaare.org/

There are forms that you can print out and complete and take to your local law enforcement/emergency response agencies to make them aware of family members and their challenges. I have them on my desk to complete and take to our local sheriff's office and to drop off at the volunteer fire dept down the street. Even as functional as Bratboy is, I worry about how he might react during an emergency situation and this might be a way to prevent something unfortunate.

[Apocalipstic]

Jen, I'm really sorry about the recent loss of your dog (f) losing a close family member is so difficult, and i hope that you will be gentle to yourself right now.

i also understand the feelings of frustration with the 'no hidden agenda' situation. repeat.repeat.repeat. there's more to write about this, and it gets very confusing to me too, so you're not alone!

do you think some of the police or not 'projection' of DA being 'mean, rude, and devious' simply stems from a lack of capacity [wiring] to even go deeper and/or to see outside of self, with compassion - in some, maybe it just isn't there ?

in that case, what do you do- keep apologising?

Thank you for your kind words about Mac, She was 15 and everyone loved her. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. I laid next to her and held her the entire time. (w)

I think the police as are afraid every moment they are at work, so many of them are killed in the line of duty, that they are taught to look for signs and to see anger or not answering as a threat. Hopefully as more people are open about AS and Autism, there will be more training and understanding for them. Also parents like Christie who fill out paperwork and take it to emergency responder personnel help too.

I apologize because conflict freaks me out and when I was a kid, no one knew about AS, so it was always deemed my fault if I did not react appropriately as the daughter of Southern Baptist Missionaries. I was in the spotlight 24/7 which makes me very jumpy. When I get that feeling, I apologize and apologize and don't trust that I am actually right. I berate and berate myself. Maybe because it seems familiar? I am in therapy and we are working on this.

xoxoxoxxoxo :bunchflowers:

Thank you for reading and for your kindness!

I hope everyone has a great day! :bunchflowers:

[violaine]

thank you, jen.

this sentence has nothing to do with SB's in general- or is against your family.

there were a few SB's in my family growing up, and i clashed with them big time because i questioned 'hypocrisy' whenever i saw it. without apologies.

hang in-

ox

:bunchflowers:

[Apocalipstic]

thank you, jen.

this sentence has nothing to do with SB's in general- or is against your family.

there were a few SB's in my family growing up, and i clashed with them big time because i questioned 'hypocrisy' whenever i saw it. without apologies.

hang in-

ox

:bunchflowers:

I experienced total hypocrisy and thought something was wrong with me that I could not act how they wanted me to, be what they wanted me to be. I even look stressed in my baby pictures.

I questioned constantly from age 3 on and was abused because of it and because my adopted father was crazy....but that's another discussion.

No one knew about AS, even if kids wrote with left hand they were abused back then. Teachers were usually mean, and kids allowed to bully. Plus I was in another country back and forth. A coping mechanism I learned was to apologize whether or not I think I am wrong. I do it when I think I have offended, whether or not what I said was in my opinion offensive. Make sense?

I am really working on the apologizing thing.

xoxoxx :bunchflowers:

[violaine]

yes, jen. you make perfect sense.

anyone who knowingly causes people to doubt their own 'perceptions' is doing a lot of harm to the child/person, and i would imagine themself. (w)

i'm glad you're talking to someone :bunchflowers:

[violaine]

http://aspergeradults.ca/

[Liam]

http://aspergeradults.ca/

Thank you, for introducing me to this blog, violaine, while reading her work, I came across this statement, which really hit home.

Having Aspergers is that living paradox of understanding so much, being blessed with amazing intellectual and thinking capacity – a very quick mind – and yet, that not mattering, socially at all.

[christie]

Thank you, for introducing me to this blog, violaine, while reading her work, I came across this statement, which really hit home.

Having Aspergers is that living paradox of understanding so much, being blessed with amazing intellectual and thinking capacity – a very quick mind – and yet, that not mattering, socially at all.

Liam -

Thank you for these words. I was reading the blog for a moment earlier (playing catchup at work - moments are few) and thought that it was an amazing site. I cant wait to have the time to dig into it.

One things I was thinking about today is how I once heard a description of being an aspie as being a freshwater fish trying to live in a saltwater world. I think that is one of the reasons I have tried so hard to assist Bratboy in finding ways to accomodate the NT world we live in - because it becomes so apparent that there is little progress in that world accomodating him.

[Apocalipstic]

Thank you for posting that link Violaine! What a great blog.

Many of the people I work with are artists and musicians and my partner is/has ? AS too, so sometimes I forget how difficult it can be out on the world until it slaps me in the face.

I especially like the post asking if we have empathy, as we discussed the other night I think we really do, but people might not see that from how we seem outwardly. I have always been mystified by what seems to be a huge disconnect between what I am actually thinking and what some people perceive or decide that I am thinking and communicating.

Also, the focus on change. The people who expect us to change and how much time we spend on it. And who are we trying to change for?

Lot's to read and process...will be back after I have read more.

[violaine]

i am glad you are enjoying the link. i found her blogs some time ago, and she keeps entries up to date, which is nice. maybe i should write and thank her for providing such great information.

jen, i used to say that i 'have' autism- because that's what i heard from NTs! i am on the spectrum. also, there are damaging statements being said/heard all of the time, like these: 'she has communication issues. [my wiring is different- not an 'issue' to ME]; she doesn't try.[what kind of expectations/standards are being set? have they been communicated - and if possible, taken into account that i'm a visual learner, perhaps shown to me - with patience?]; she does x.y.z deliberately. [this one slays me and has since childhood! i am not an inflexible person who cannot see roundly]; she is aware of x.y.z.' - [true! i'm very observant! this last remark is not meant as a compliment, however]. . . i could go on until i ran out of space here! where do those thoughts / projections come from, and why? the blog explains it really well, i think.

[Apocalipstic]

i am glad you are enjoying the link. i found her blogs some time ago, and she keeps entries up to date, which is nice. maybe i should write and thank her for providing such great information.

jen, i used to say that i 'have' autism- because that's what i heard from NTs! i am on the spectrum. also, there are damaging statements being said/heard all of the time, like these: 'she has communication issues. [my wiring is different- not an 'issue' to ME]; she doesn't try.[what kind of expectations/standards are being set? have they been communicated - and if possible, taken into account that i'm a visual learner, perhaps shown to me - with patience?]; she does x.y.z deliberately. [this one slays me and has since childhood! i am not an inflexible person who cannot see roundly]; she is aware of x.y.z.' - [true! i'm very observant! this last remark is not meant as a compliment, however]. . . i could go on until i ran out of space here! where do those thoughts / projections come from, and why? the blog explains it really well, i think.


The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

[Liam]

I just watched Adam, a movie about a fellow aspergian. Has anyone else seen it? What did you think of it?

[violaine]

[QUOTE=apocalipstic;162503]The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

did you ever try to explain to the teachers that you were listening, thinking, feeling, following, understanding . . . only to be met with something ELSE [negatively stated] about your tone of voice ? ? ? being called 'argumentative' in responding to how they so wrongly perceived you?

[Ursy]

The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

I got that - well, I got branded "lazy". "Apply herself" was something that I heard a lot, as well as "daydreaming" - oh yes, and the "stop drawing during class" - I once got into big trouble for drawing on an exam once I'd answered all the questions that I could. But nobody had heard of Asperger's back then. I wonder if it would have been easier if they had? I guess so...

I just watched Adam, a movie about a fellow aspergian. Has anyone else seen it? What did you think of it?

I saw it - awhile ago. I think I enjoyed it, could see myself in some of it (not all). I think some of it was a bit over-simplified but that could have been for the benefit of the masses who might not know a lot about people on the autistic spectrum... but overall, I think it was a pretty good movie. My favourite is Snow Cake, even though the character Sigourney Weaver played was more autistic than asperger's. I think her daughter was probably aspie.



did you ever try to explain to the teachers that you were listening, thinking, feeling, following, understanding . . . only to be met with something ELSE [negatively stated] about your tone of voice ? ? ? being called 'argumentative' in responding to how they so wrongly perceived you?

I wish I could have tried, though it sounds like it would not have helped anyway - I would have been misinterpreted just like you described, Belle. I usually would just cry and be completely unable to advocate for myself or explain anything at all.

It's very frustrating to be so emotionally fragile!

[suebee]

"Does not pay attention. Easily distracted." But with me it was undiagnosed ADD. To this day I have to explain myself. I once told a friend who was a physician that I had ADD. He told me that I was "far too intelligent to have ADD". And this was only ten years ago!

[Ursy]

"Does not pay attention. Easily distracted." But with me it was undiagnosed ADD. To this day I have to explain myself. I once told a friend who was a physician that I had ADD. He told me that I was "far too intelligent to have ADD". And this was only ten years ago!

Isn't it frustrating?

In a similar vein, I had a psychiatrist, who incorrectly diagnosed me as bipolar, tell me that I couldn't have asperger's because I was nothing like Mr Bean.

I can kinda lol about it now...

[Apocalipstic]

I just watched Adam, a movie about a fellow aspergian. Has anyone else seen it? What did you think of it?

I have not seen it, will place on my Netflix list :) Thank you!

[QUOTE=apocalipstic;162503]The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

did you ever try to explain to the teachers that you were listening, thinking, feeling, following, understanding . . . only to be met with something ELSE [negatively stated] about your tone of voice ? ? ? being called 'argumentative' in responding to how they so wrongly perceived you?

Yes, but I got that at home more. I was always in trouble for "talking back" which ot me was trying to explain in a logical and clear way what I meant. But it never flew.

I got that - well, I got branded "lazy". "Apply herself" was something that I heard a lot, as well as "daydreaming" - oh yes, and the "stop drawing during class" - I once got into big trouble for drawing on an exam once I'd answered all the questions that I could. But nobody had heard of Asperger's back then. I wonder if it would have been easier if they had? I guess so...

I saw it - awhile ago. I think I enjoyed it, could see myself in some of it (not all). I think some of it was a bit over-simplified but that could have been for the benefit of the masses who might not know a lot about people on the autistic spectrum... but overall, I think it was a pretty good movie. My favourite is Snow Cake, even though the character Sigourney Weaver played was more autistic than asperger's. I think her daughter was probably aspie.

I wish I could have tried, though it sounds like it would not have helped anyway - I would have been misinterpreted just like you described, Belle. I usually would just cry and be completely unable to advocate for myself or explain anything at all.

It's very frustrating to be so emotionally fragile!

I still am a daydreamer! :)

And yes, it is still very frustrating. I soemtimes think all my nerve endings are on the surface.

"Does not pay attention. Easily distracted." But with me it was undiagnosed ADD. To this day I have to explain myself. I once told a friend who was a physician that I had ADD. He told me that I was "far too intelligent to have ADD". And this was only ten years ago!

UGH. Yes yes. I have ben told that I don't look like I have anything wrong, so I don't.

Isn't it frustrating?

In a similar vein, I had a psychiatrist, who incorrectly diagnosed me as bipolar, tell me that I couldn't have asperger's because I was nothing like Mr Bean.

I can kinda lol about it now...

Mr. Bean? Nice.

[JazzGirl]

Thank you to all who post here. I am seldom here but am pleased to find the writings of you all when I do visit. I do not feel so alone in the reading of your words.

I can relate. I recently was shocked but happy to hear another person in my life say, YOU have spent all of your life attempting to conform to the world. I believe it is time for the world to begin to conform to you. You are perfect just the way you are. One day the rest of the world will know that, too.

Jazzie

[violaine]

ursy wrote on emotional fragility - yes! i wear it on my sleeve, but as an adult, people have called it 'immature/unacceptable' behaviour, and might really take advantage of one who is super sensitive. there are so many ways too!.

[Apocalipstic]

ursy wrote on emotional fragility - yes! i wear it on my sleeve, but as an adult, people have called it 'immature/unacceptable' behaviour, and might really take advantage of one who is super sensitive. there are so many ways too!.

I am trying to remove the people who stress me out or refuse to LISTEN to me one by one from my life.

[violaine]

i have not seen 'adam', but i really did like snow cake, urs!

the character opposite sigourney weaver in this film was awesome because he did not personalise 'her needs' - or trample all over what boundaries [the kitchen!] she needed to set in place in order to cope /just go on to the next step each day for her.

i loved that.

[Jess]

Another thread was started regarding the Children's Hospital in Boston and reading through it I was lead to this article. I pray more Governors/ politicians will follow this lead!

http://childrenshospitalblog.org/autism-advocates-and-families-celebrate-new-bill/

[christie]

Another thread was started regarding the Children's Hospital in Boston and reading through it I was lead to this article. I pray more Governors/ politicians will follow this lead!

http://childrenshospitalblog.org/autism-advocates-and-families-celebrate-new-bill/

This is GREAT news! I wish that the awareness/treatments of today were in place when Bratboy was diagnosed - it would have made the journey less arduous.

[violaine]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-10933276

10 August 2010 Last updated at 17:29 ET

A new brain scan which can detect autism with more than 90% accuracy has been developed by scientists from Kings College London.

The researchers say the scan should make diagnosis of the condition quicker and more straightforward, but some experts warn that more testing will be needed before the technique is rolled out to the public.

Jane Hughes reports.

[violaine]

http://chaoticidealism.livejournal.com/82464.html


:moonstars:

[FeminineAllure]

I saw Adam a couple of weeks ago. I was curious so I rented it.
I enjoyed it. http://www.foxsearchlight.com/adam/

[JazzGirl]

Passing through seeking this place as a touchstone.

Love to you all!
Jazzie

[christie]

I have been meaning to post since Belle shared the link a while back of the blog - thanks, Belle! It came at a time when I really needed to read it!

As for Bratboy and his transition to VA and beginning his senior year at PCHS, we couldn't be more proud as to his progress. It was a lil touch and go at the beginning of the school year as he was moving from a very small, specialized school environment with less than 100 kids total in the school (K-12) and only about 6 in his grade level to a fully mainstreamed high school with over 1000 kids total and about 200 in his grade level. To say that he was a little overwhelmed is an understatement!

Riding the bus was a huge issue and just added to his stress level. Jess has been taxi driver extraordinaire and making the bus issue "one less thing" helped Bratboy navigate this huge change.

We couldn't ask for more support than from the staff at the high school. They go over and beyond to keep us informed, sometimes even on a daily basis. If there is a question or issue, you best bet that my crackberry will be dinging away with an email. We have really appreciated their quick response.

We had an IEP meeting yesterday to transfer his current IEP from TN to VA. The reports from all of his teachers - well, I couldn't have asked for better! It was also the last day of the first grading period and he has one 100, two B's and one C.

The 100 is in "resource" which is basically a study hall for him - a smaller class where he has the opportunity to have more individualized instruction if needed and a place to finish any classwork/homework assignments. The other classes are mainstream and he has very little accommodation/allowances. Even though he is dysgraphic and has traditionally been unable to handwrite at a rate to keep up, he has chosen to not utilize his laptop as covered by the IEP but to handwrite (in most instances) just like everyone else!

He is socializing with his peer group as opposed to kids who aren't his social equals - he has typically gravitated towards more differently abled kids or adults - never that equal population. One of his teachers is also the senior courtyard monitor and was telling us how he is usually one of the first out at lunch and she sees all the other kids gravitate towards him as they arrive. Rather than being, literally, on the outside of the group, he is right up in the middle of it!

While this might seem like a very small thing to most folks, its a huge thing for him and for us - its like he has reached the finish line of a race I have never been certain he would complete.

Wal-Mart is like the mall of our lil town. We can't go without him running into 6-7 kids that he knows. Last night, he went to the county fair and was telling us how he kept bouncing from group to group and it just made my heart swell to hear how he is finding community here.

One of the biggest issues I had with him in Nashville is that after school, he would go to his room and literally stay there, online (either XBox Live or some virtual reality site) until bedtime. Trying to get him to have an interest outside of virtual was like trying to move a mountain.

Now, I can't tell you all how many times watching him seeking us out, being engaged in life, has brought tears to my eyes. With my work demands, I am away from home about three-four days a week and he and Jess have really bonded and formed a relationship that has far exceeded my expectations. I love that they have this connection that is completely independent of me.

Jess has stepped into parenthood in a big way! Its never easy to be a step parent, in the best of circumstances, and I am so proud and grateful that Jess, without hesitation, has committed to that role.

I wish I could say that some of the hygiene/chore responsibility issues have magically disappeared. They haven't. But I will say that I am pleased with the progress already made and I am still hopeful that one day we will hit upon the magical button and these things will no longer be an issue. There is even a part of me that is ok with having these issues as I think they are pretty age appropriate and not related to his challenges.

He just had his 17th birthday last week. My baby is all grown up! I'm having Mommy issues!

All in all, life's pretty damned good. For the young man who was told just in May that he could not succeed in a mainstream highschool, I think he has already proven that to be just wrong. For the young man who basically came out of his room to forage for food, there are times when I wish he would go to his room to give us some alone time!

Thank you all for your encouragement and support. If I don't say it often enough, I appreciate your being here and sharing yourselves. Its often given me hope for him when I have had doubts and concerns as to life for my Aspie as an adult.

Big, mad gay love for you all,
Christie

[Ursy]

Wow Christie, that's wonderful stuff :)

I just love it when our kids surpass our wildest dreams for them. My Bek does that to me often - it's so heartening.

I just came in to post a request for you all, since we are all pretty blessed in our own ways... sometimes it's good to pay it forward.

My friend Tithen needs help in getting his voice (Dynavox Vmax) and an electric wheelchair. He is on the autistic spectrum, just like many of us. I would appreciate it greatly if you visited the link and watched Tithen's Vmax trial video so you can see just how important it is that he get this as soon as possible. Any donation, no matter how small, helps. Every little bit adds up.

http://www.angelfire.com/me5/lilking/Fundraising.html

And if you can't donate, that's ok - maybe you could spread the word? Every little bit helps. Tithen deserves his voice and his legs - please help him to get them!

[Ursy]

Rain Man was on television tonight, and I watched it with mixed feelings. I guess it was groundbreaking in its day, but what struck me more was how stereotypical it was... and something didn't ring true with Dustin Hoffman's portrayal for me (but nevertheless, I think he made a valiant effort). I was thinking how even today, it's referenced quite frequently when the topic of autism comes up... but watching it tonight I can tell you that that's not all there is to autism.

It was very interesting, nonetheless.

*ponders some more*

I just came up with an analogy!

Being on the autistic spectrum is kind of like having a photographic memory, but you have no control over when the shutter goes off!

Or is that just me? Lol. I remember the most random things with amazing precision... it's rarely useful.

[Jude]

Rain Man was on television tonight, and I watched it with mixed feelings. I guess it was groundbreaking in its day, but what struck me more was how stereotypical it was... and something didn't ring true with Dustin Hoffman's portrayal for me (but nevertheless, I think he made a valiant effort). I was thinking how even today, it's referenced quite frequently when the topic of autism comes up... but watching it tonight I can tell you that that's not all there is to autism.

It was very interesting, nonetheless.

*ponders some more*

I just came up with an analogy!

Being on the autistic spectrum is kind of like having a photographic memory, but you have no control over when the shutter goes off!

Or is that just me? Lol. I remember the most random things with amazing precision... it's rarely useful.

______________
That is one of many autistic traits. It's a spectrum. People with aspergers syndrome do tend to frequently have a superior ability to commit to memory, particularly amongst those topics of interest to themselves. And there are other people with aspergers who can't find their own belly button in a pinch.

[Jude]

Just posing one out of curiosity. Are there others who feel the need for more physical distance than the average person. I come from a family on the spectrum and suspect that I share some aspie charactertistics, most subtle.

What I have recently come to realize about myself is that I sometimes, even randomly, feel the almost desperate need to step away physically. I feel very uncomfortable when people are directly in my face addressing me. My daughter brought this up and I hadn't been consciously aware until now. Outside of very personal intimacy, I really don't like people's heads in my face or literally breathing down my neck. Friendly hugs are wonderful, but come with a time limit. Sometimes I just need to walk out in the midst of commotion and be alone for 10 minutes.

Does "IN YOUR FACE" send shudders up anyone elses' backbone?

[Apocalipstic]

Just posing one out of curiosity. Are there others who feel the need for more physical distance than the average person. I come from a family on the spectrum and suspect that I share some aspie characteristics, most subtle.

What I have recently come to realize about myself is that I sometimes, even randomly, feel the almost desperate need to step away physically. I feel very uncomfortable when people are directly in my face addressing me. My daughter brought this up and I hadn't been consciously aware until now. Outside of very personal intimacy, I really don't like people's heads in my face or literally breathing down my neck. Friendly hugs are wonderful, but come with a time limit. Sometimes I just need to walk out in the midst of commotion and be alone for 10 minutes.

Does "IN YOUR FACE" send shudders up anyone elses' backbone?

Ohhhh yes, I have huge personal space and especially creep out when someone stands behind me.

In fact, I keep rearranging my office trying to keep people from coming behind my desk. It makes me so tense I could shatter.

When I visit large cities like London or NYC I have to really focus on not freaking out...people get way closer than I am comfortable with. I look for openings in the crowd and go in and around quickly....but after I am so exhausted I feel like my brain is going to disintegrate. Spining doors are the worst. Why can't people stay in their own little partitions?

I have learned to like to hug, but really quickly unless I feel comfortable with the person.

People with poor personal space management creep me OUT.

And sometimes when people speak to me in parking lots, or buffets or when I am in my own world it freaks me out. I like to be left alone.

[Liam]

Just posing one out of curiosity. Are there others who feel the need for more physical distance than the average person. I come from a family on the spectrum and suspect that I share some aspie charactertistics, most subtle.

What I have recently come to realize about myself is that I sometimes, even randomly, feel the almost desperate need to step away physically. I feel very uncomfortable when people are directly in my face addressing me. My daughter brought this up and I hadn't been consciously aware until now. Outside of very personal intimacy, I really don't like people's heads in my face or literally breathing down my neck. Friendly hugs are wonderful, but come with a time limit. Sometimes I just need to walk out in the midst of commotion and be alone for 10 minutes.

Does "IN YOUR FACE" send shudders up anyone elses' backbone?

I have always been uncomfortable, with the typical seventeen inches most folks are comfortable with. I am comfortable hugging only those I know very well. I am extremely uncomfortable in large crowds and rarely subject myself to them.

[Andrew, Jr.]

I was told by Rosie to post the following information so it's public for all to read.

I have TBI - Traumatic Brain Injury (left temporal lobe)
Asperger's
Developmental Disabilities - like learning disabilities


I don't stalk people online. That is illegal. What I do is I go and read and reread what they write. I have what is called mind blindness. If you walked in front of me, I would not be able to tell you hi because I have no idea of who you were or what your dog or cat's name is, or if you are allergic to pets.

I have tics. :twitch: It is frustrating. Not funny or to be made fun of. You have no idea.

I have seizures.

The movie "Adam" is wonderful in showing Asperger's. I recommend it for everyone to rent. Another wonderful movie is "Temple Gredin" for Autism.

Andrew

PS: If you want to ask me any question, please feel free too.

[Nat]

Thanks for reviving this thread. I've been wanting it lately. I heard some things about ADHD and wanted to share - for others who have it and for those who deal with us regularly.

I heard an interview recently where it was mentioned that people without ADHD have brains that function in beta waves during alert activity and work, but that the front of the ADHD brain tends to function in theta waves (the waves usually found as a person is falling asleep). This helps explain our function impairment but also our abilities to free-associate heavily - which is often something non-adhd people end up doing as they try to fall asleep. Anyway, I hadn't heard this before, but I found it on the Conversations with Mensa podcast show "Taking Control of ADD."

We ADHD folks have trouble with "executive function": categorizing, prioritizing and initiating action. We also have social deficits. We have poor inhibition control / high impulsivity. We don't always understand the *rules* of social interaction or business life. About 50% of us have some OCD symtoms and about 30% of OCD folks have some ADHD symptoms. About 50% of us will struggle with substance abuse issues at some point in our lives. As kids, we're often told that we are not performing to our potential, that we need to apply ourselves more, that we are lazy. The truth is that we are applying ourselves probably twice as hard and our results are half as successful.

I found a diagram once regarding problem-solving and comparing ADHD to Aspergers. Both are neuro-biological and they have both similarities and differences. I would say our similarities are - that we don't always understand the social cues and unwritten rules of conversation and social behavior and often we will be attracted to and collect unusual sets of knowledge. This problem-solving diagram showed something interesting though about our differences. If an ADHD person is presented with a problem, we are very quick to say, "screw this" and abandon whatever it is we are working on. Then, we will work it out in the back of our minds and sometimes we will come back and actually have a greater attention span for fixing the problem to the end. Aspies have a much longer time - longer than non-aspie folks - before they hit the "screw this" stage. That stamina among aspies is extremely effective for Aspies though it may cause them to focus on something counterproductive at some points.

[Andrew, Jr.]

I think if more people watched the movie "Adam" would understand more.

[Venus007]

I have a very difficult time with personal space, even sometimes from people I am close to or intimate with. If I am concentrating, overstimulated in any way (visually, emotionally, or auditory etc.) too hot, too cold or pretty much anything other than comfortable and relaxed physical touch is too much for me, it almost hurts and it disrupts my ability to think. I have learned to tolerate the accidental invasions of the people around me (it feels like an invasion often) I try not to get snippy or pull violently away but sometimes I still flinch. (So irritating when trying to appear typical) Even more difficult for me is that from people I love I need to be touched to feel connected. What a shitty conundrum.

Most large crowds are too much for me, I can make myself deal with them (although I usually avoid them) afterword I am very quiet and withdrawn and NEED to be alone for awhile.

Strangely enough I can totally handle a large crowd when I am dancing, there instead of feeling like an invasion or like pain, the touch and movement feel welcome, like I am a part a great writhing joyful unified transcendence. Perhaps because the strong beat unifies everything, or perhaps because when I am dancing I feel completely free and loose like I am in the hot center of being, or perhaps because I have a special relationship with music that over rides everything else.


Just posing one out of curiosity. Are there others who feel the need for more physical distance than the average person. (snip)
Does "IN YOUR FACE" send shudders up anyone elses' backbone?

[violaine]

Venus,

i totally understand about the flinching! there's an earlier post on this somewhere about my not even realising that i pulled away/flinched at times; but my boyfriend saw it [and filled in missing pieces for me later whenever i wondered aloud what happened during a strange and/or awkward greeting/departure]. same way for me with a crowd- if music is good, and i'm dancing, everything else [sensory issues] tend to fade if i'm out of my head-happy/happy.

[violaine]

http://www.sheldrickwildlifetrust.org/html/about_daphne_sheldrick.html

this woman amazes me. she developed a formula, after twenty-eight years for these precious babies, which is coconut milk-based.

[violaine]

http://memebase.com/category/socially-awkward-penguin/

[Quintease]

I'm ADD, my brother is an aspie. I'd love to read this thread but it's too long..

[Quintease]

I found a diagram once regarding problem-solving and comparing ADHD to Aspergers.

I want to see this!

[violaine]

http://www.connecticutspecialeducationlawyer.com/occasional-rants/phoebe-prince-bullying-disabilities-and-the-eggshell-skull/

[Andrew, Jr.]

I know I am different. But does anyone else feel _________ when other people in public/private, make obvious remarks or comments that are not so nice about you? I know people will say things that go right over my head. I don't even know that I am to respond or have no clue as to what to say. Sometimes I don't even realize that they are insulting me. I struggle with this.

Does anyone else?

[violaine]

[QUOTE=Andrew, Jr.;331850]
I know I am different. But does anyone else feel _________ when other people in public/private, make obvious remarks or comments that are not so nice about you? I know people will say things that go right over my head. I don't even know that I am to respond or have no clue as to what to say. Sometimes I don't even realize that they are insulting me. I struggle with this.

Does anyone else?


in school, i probably did not notice being bullied so much. there was one time, i was asked to meet some 'friends' at a specific location; right before i left my house, the phone rang with a warning from a trusted friend who found out the intentions of the people were to pick a fight with me. i had totally missed everything related to their plans, and would have shown up at the spot.

that's human though, and not necessarily spectrum related. i do believe i'm not looking for mean spirited people around every corner, and being on-guard 24/7 would totally wear me out. what i can share with you, andrew, about 'not knowing how to respond' is this, please: processing information can take time- sometimes much longer depending upon wiring, the scenario, health, and many other variables. if i am upset and/or very confused- i will not be able to put into words my feelings- i just feel [and the feeling is enough to know things are not right for me]. later on, i can articulate better the circumstances and how i was effected/affected.

it's like when i used to get lost- maybe pass my own house- and would wonder, what was 'wrong' with me? usually, i was having an anxiety/panic attack and it made sense that i was terribly confused. people who are intentionally unkind may use this in their arsenal- someone may bank on their 'target' feeling too confused to respond immediately - if at all. on one hand, it's a good thing :) on the other hand, finding the words- the ones 'perceived' to be the 'right words' can be frustrating if you are needing to be yourself- and just get the words out as an expression of self- in your own way. especially, if you are responding to someone who was unkind [set you up to fail] in the first place!

[Andrew, Jr.]

Oh Belle,

I knew you would get it! Yes, I was very much bullied in shcool. It was nothing short of hell for me. I stuck with sports mostly because this. It was a way for me to have a release, like playing tennis and football. I just loved it.

There are some days Belle, I feel like I need one of those GPS's to get me from my house to my car or mailbox. Or I walk by someone and they get mad at me for not saying hi to them. Now I just hug and say hi to everyone. That way nobody gets upset, hurt, or insulted, or whatever.

Now I just wonder about my future a great deal. I think as I have aged and have disabilities, with no family to really speak of, who is going to care for me when and if Rosie dies, or if I have a massive stroke leaving me even more disabled. Life is very hard now, and adding on to this, makes me think a great deal of the future.

Belle, you rock!

[Venus007]

I am tired today. Tired of the neurotypical with their loud voices, shrieking vocalizations, bright lights, clanging banging hubbub. Tired of their secret code of subtext that is different from what they say and that they penalize you for not understanding that they don't say what they mean, you're just supposed to read their minds. Tired of people standing too close, touching without invitation. Tired of strangers or rather non-intimates prying for emotion. I am tired of people today. I want solitude with my dogs. I want to not talk for a week. Today I am tired.

[violaine]

do any of you have an aspie support group in your area? there is one here, in orlando at UcF, and some of the presentations are really good.


christie, thought of you with this article:

http://www.theautismnews.com/2009/09/11/intensive-program-helps-prepare-aspergers-autistic-students-for-college/

[Andrew, Jr.]

No adult aspie group in my area. However, there is one for children - thank God!

The one thing I will say is this...I wish I could read faces and body language better. I just don't. It goes right over my head.

[violaine]

andrew, my friend [i am going to write about in a moment here] is a rocket scientist- literally, and he says the same thing you are writing. he cannot read body language and/or figure out what people are 'thinking.'

have you ever attended any of the groups for young adults/parents/supporters ? that's how i met one of my closest friends; he and i were the only adults there for a while, and the parents/supporters were very interested in our contributions to the group.

just an idea : sometimes if you are in a space to give of yourself, that can be a rewarding experience.

[Andrew, Jr.]

I rely on others for help when in public or dealing with a business type of event. I have experienced some pretty humilitating situations that were really nobody's fault, but a knee jerk reaction.

I am going to research your idea. Thanks for that thought! (f)

[violaine]

i wanted to mention that my aspie friend [above post] met his girlfriend at a support group, and she is into permaculture in maine. he is quite a bit younger; their age difference is by fourteen years, and works beautifully. i might wonder about dating someone that much younger than myself who is not on the spectrum, but in AS to AS relationships, i would have few concerns age-wise.

[christie]

Belle -

Thank you SO much for the article on Aspie college prep courses! The Life Skills class at Woodrow Wilson Rehabilitation Hospital in Staunton, VA is very similar. Bratboy had an introduction to the class in February when he did the 14 day eval. Since then, he has taken on doing his own laundry (for the most part - after 9700 reminders from Jess and I).

I may look into the two different programs mentioned in the article that you posted - always nice to have a backup plan!

[violaine]

beginning conversations about birds, bugs, or . . . .

THINGS BULLIES SAY ABOUT ASPIES

Rude

Rude

Aspies aren't being rude when we don't get what you are trying to say between the lines; we just don't read non-verbal communication very well



Insensitive

Insensitive

Aspies have a very hard time trying to pick up on the needs of others or to see things from someone else's perspective



Domineering

Domineering

I suppose it can seem that way when someone is pedantic by nature and not picking up on subtle social signals; but the intent is not to be domineering



Pedantic

Pedantic

Yes, guilty, Aspies are pedantic; our brains are hard-wired that way, that's why we make such good scientists and IT's



Inconsiderate

Inconsiderate

Aspies have a very hard time trying to pick up on the needs of others or to see things from someone else's perspective unless it is spoken



Talks too loud

Talks too loud or too soft, or with a monotonous voice

It is common for Aspies to have odd prosody of speech, typically too loud or too soft



Talks too much / won't let anyone else get a word in

Can't shut them up

Aspies typically lack the receptors for non-verbal social signals



Ignores body language

Shocking at non-verbal communication

Aspies typically lack the receptors for non-verbal social signals



Says and does inappropriate things

Says and does inappropriate things

Aspies have difficulty in judging the appropriateness of different behaviours in different social situations



Won't consider someone else's opinion

Selfish, narrow minded

An unfortunate symptom of Asperger's is that we do not react well to change; this makes it hard to instinctively "get" others' opinions without being spelled out



Only wants to talk about jellyfish i just posted on jellyfish. haha

Only wants to talk about their special interest

One of the key features of Asperger's and other Autism disorders is for sufferers to have an obsessional special interest

Anti-social

Anti-social

Aspies are reknowned for being uncomfortable in social situations, preferring reading, writing, computing, or other 'anti-social' activities



Off in my own world

Head in the Clouds

Yes, I suppose Aspies are that way



and some kind of case here:

http://launcestoncityscandal.com/discrimination.html

i have not read through the entire thing. i'm thinking in the work space i've not [that i'm aware of] experienced too much bullying. maybe a couple instances of 'sabotage.' once, while teaching at the humane society, there was someone who wanted my job but refused to assist me whenever invited, or make an effort to learn the ropes on her own. she hid some of my paperwork, destroyed some things, and refused to let people know about what i was there to do, i found out later. my time spent at the HS in those days, was for the shelter animals. was that a form of bullying?


the positions that i've held doing my own thing, seem to be the ideal situation for me. like right now, i do see people, of course, and must have interaction; it's just not upsetting The Job iam/we are there to perform, nor am i having to stress over sensory issues.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Belle,

Did you ever experience the situation where people set you up to fail at work?

[violaine]

[QUOTE=Andrew, Jr.;335431]
Belle,

Did you ever experience the situation where people set you up to fail at work?



yes! six months into 2005, a situation arose with my being on a board. i was asked at my address, then later nominated for the position, and i thought of many positive ideas for involving this communiy with its residents and small town. what i did not know, and could not have conceived of, andrew, was that the majority of board members wanted me to discourage a woman from attending functions by eliminating her in the process of voting, volunteerism, common day-to-day issues, et c. people saw her as 'weak' and could not 'see' her disability. they were very cruel and expected that i would support them because they did, after all, 'want me' as their 'leader.' what they failed to see in setting me up for failure, was that i am not a weak person. witnessing the preying on people viewed as weak freaked me out and i could hardly believe my eyes, but it happened. i was used, and did maintain my post for a year, but with new supporters :)

i posted on this before. the woman had been bullied right off of riding a bus to get her groceries, and it did take me some time to straighten that out with the transportation supervisor, because she had 'bought into' the horrible stories herself about someone she had never even met.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Yes, I have had it happen to me as well. I have always experienced the negative & rejecting side of society. I think that is why I would much rather be around animals and just people watch. What is inside just never comes out right or comes out backwards or people look at me like I have 3 heads. Even when I did my activist work for trans-folks. The medical community here in Balto. sucks if you ask me.

[Quintease]

This looks interesting http://www.jkp.com/catalogue/book/9781849058261

[Semantics]

This looks interesting http://www.jkp.com/catalogue/book/9781849058261

I'm going to order that one. Thanks.

There's another good book specifically about girls on the spectrum called Girls Under the Umbrella of Autism Spectrum Disorders that I highly recommend.

[Jess]

Belle -

Thank you SO much for the article on Aspie college prep courses! The Life Skills class at Woodrow Wilson Rehabilitation Hospital in Staunton, VA is very similar. Bratboy had an introduction to the class in February when he did the 14 day eval. Since then, he has taken on doing his own laundry (for the most part - after 9700 reminders from Jess and I).

I may look into the two different programs mentioned in the article that you posted - always nice to have a backup plan!


He seems to be beginning to understand that actions or the lack thereof have consequences.

Six months ago I would have been asked to explain "WHYYYYYYYYY?" 58 times..... he was going to lose his internet privileges for not doing his chores ( clean his filthy room..LOL).

Today, we come home from school. He asked when he would get his web back and I quietly answered when he tidied his room and he started a load of laundry. No questions. In 15 minutes he brought his dishes downstairs and began a load of clothes. He got web back and later I will remind him to come put clothes in dryer. Trick is to remind early enough to still have internet bargaining time left. LOL.

In trying to prepare him for life in the world beyond the cloister of home and school, we are trying desperately at times, to instill in him the notions of social and personal responsibility. It has been an interesting journey for all of us.

[violaine]

love jessica kingsley publishers! rudy simone:


http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/women_shealth/7944522/Help-at-last-for-the-Aspergirls.html

[Andrew, Jr.]

Auditory Processing Delay...anyone else hear of this?

[violaine]

andrew, i am familiar with auditory processing delay. here are some links for a bit of understanding about the problems caused with auditory processing delay in adults/children:

http://qw88nb88.wordpress.com/living-with-auditory-processing-disorder/

i love the section on bugs! :0}


http://www.actg.org/programs/auditory/auditory_auditoryprocessing.htm


i stumbled upon this in some of my research work [some of you know that's what i do intermittently work-wise for an author/attorney.]


http://www.portfolio.com/news-markets/national-news/portfolio/2009/02/11/Two-Lawyers-Fight-Cyber-Bullying


got a kick out of this question on a law forum- "assuming you are non-aspie!" HA!
http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1648252&mc=27&forum_id=2#18011945

[JazzGirl]

Peeking in from out of my hermitage.:rrose:

P.S. May you all be blessed and loved.

Jazzie

[Fanbutch]

Hello :) Just popping in to see if anyone was about.

[Ursy]

Hello :)
It's been awhile. I hope all is well with everyone.

[girl_dee]

Hello :)
It's been awhile. I hope all is well with everyone.

i Ursy, nice to see you again :)

[Ursy]

i Ursy, nice to see you again :)

Thank you hon, it's nice to be back :)

[Bit]

*peeks in to see what Urs is up to* Hi hon! Got nothing to say, just following you around. :cheesy:

[Girl_On_Fire]

Hello everyone. I can't believe I missed this thread! Wait, yes I can. I always miss the obvious. lol!

I'm a self-diagnosed aspie since 2007. I stumbled upon the disorder from a combination of the way others reacted to me and Googling, "Why do I take everything literally?" one day out of sheer frustration.

Since then, it's been an amazing journey. Finding out I have Asperger's syndrome helped put the puzzle pieces of my life together. I don't have an official diagnosis and have not yet sought one. I'm a woman in my early 30s and from the research I've done, it seems it is very difficult to diagnose women older than 25 because of our unique ability to "parrot" appropriate social responses by watching and memorizing.

My symptoms:


I take what is said to me literally
I have a shuddering aversion to certain sounds/textures
I have no sense of direction
I get sensory overload so bad driving on highways I start to black out
I don't read non-verbal cues well
I am empathic/highly sensitive
I can't stand change in my routine
Others often misunderstand the intentions of my words/deeds
I need lots of time to myself
I have muscle twitches and tics
I flap, stretch, and squeak (stims, I guess)


This isn't to say I can't function at all. I actually do quite well and have been doing well since I realized that I truly was wired differently. In 2008, I did a series of homeopathic remedies called "Brain Protocol (http://www.optionsnaturopathic.com/brain_protocol.php)" to treat another medical condition I'd struggled with for years. My homeopathic doctor believed I had developmental issues based on the medical condition I was experiencing because nothing else would treat it. However, I had no idea that this was also used and successfully to treat people on the autistic spectrum.

After the treatment, I found new connections had been turned "on" in my brain. Not only was the chronic medical condition clearing up (finally) but my brain was working differently. I was able to see "obvious" things that had never been obvious before. I was also able to successfully drive to a park and go hiking without getting lost (okay, I got lost in the woods once I got there but I found my way out). So this was amazing for me. I didn't venture out of the house much because of my complete lack of direction. I never could have hiked even well-blazed trails with a map because maps used to mean nothing to me.

So, the brain protocol helped but yes, I'm still an Aspie.

When I was a child, people terrified me. It seemed I was always being pulled out of my beautiful, safe imaginary world to be yelled at and told I was being rude of doing something wrong. I spent many years hysterically hyperventilating and explaining myself profusely when there would be misunderstandings between myself and my family. I'd swear to God I "didn't do it" when, in reality, perhaps I did but just didn't view the situation the same way and had more innocent intentions.

Being an Aspie can make communication very difficult. After nearly 3 years of being in a relationship with somebody with a severe mental illness, the two proved impossible to meld together. We loved each other but we were ultimately incompatible. I understand on all levels what it's like to have Asperger's and have certain people understand and others look at you like you just walked off the Mother ship. I've just been trying to tell myself not everybody needs to understand me and if they don't, it's best I walk away. I'm extremely emotionally sensitive and susceptible to being abused and mistreated, not because I'm a victim but because I take everything so literally and have trouble accurately interpreting the intentions of others. Also, some people, it seems especially those who've been deeply traumatized themselves, mistake my social ignorance for purposeful cruel intent, which is the exact antithesis of who I am. I can't be in any type of relationship where I have to explain myself, sometimes hysterically, for months and even years. There has to be a cut-off point where it's like, "Okay, if you don't believe me, I am not safe with you and must move on."

I've learned trusting my God-given empathic abilities is my best bet in avoiding future emotional devastation. Though I cannot read social cues well, I am usually spot on with what I sense energetically from another.

Thank you for this thread!

I hope we can keep the dialogue going.

[Bit]

Hi, Girl on Fire, welcome! I'm glad you've found ways to understand yourself.

Congrats on the hike, and getting yourself unlost! My sense of direction is so bad. I'm never sure I can get unlost... I have gotten lost before just walking from work to home when it was only four blocks and I had done it for a year already!! So I'm pretty impressed that you got unlost in the woods.

I can read maps just fine, but I never seem to get them pointed in the right direction. "North" seems to default to wherever I'm facing at the moment; I tell people I'm directionally dyslexic. My first partner used to laugh and say that I'm just "upside down and going in the opposite direction in a parallel universe." She doesn't seem to have been far wrong. *wry laugh*

[Girl_On_Fire]

[SIZE=3][COLOR=teal]"North" seems to default to wherever I'm facing at the moment;

Yes!! That's the way I read maps too. Where I'm facing is "North" to me, even though I know that's not true.

I also have the staring thing. I need to stare off into space to deal with sensory overload at least 5 times a day. I may not do it for long but it's how I "rest" in between "takes" of life. My ex didn't understand this for a very long time. I'd just power down and hy'd ask what hy'd done wrong or what my problem was and I was like, "I'm resting. This is how I rest." And I'd keep starting blankly with my mouth slightly open. I know what's going on around me most of the time, I just need to tune out a bit so I can keep going all day. I got sick of explaining all the time after we'd been together for years. Some people, I guess, simply cannot or will not accept neurodiverse people.

[Bit]

Yanno, you're scaring me here girlfriend... *very wry smile* I "zone out" which is pretty much what you just described, staring (mouth closed in my case) with my eyes unfocused because it's just too much... and yes, I can talk while I do it but I really don't wish to have to actually look at anything... or anyone.

(And yes I deleted my post so I could go back and get yours to quote because I have this GENIUS for not quoting someone and then I turn the page, and it happened AGAIN... aaarrrggghhh, lol!)
Yes!! That's the way I read maps too. Where I'm facing is "North" to me, even though I know that's not true.

I also have the staring thing. I need to stare off into space to deal with sensory overload at least 5 times a day. I may not do it for long but it's how I "rest" in between "takes" of life. My ex didn't understand this for a very long time. I'd just power down and hy'd ask what hy'd done wrong or what my problem was and I was like, "I'm resting. This is how I rest." And I'd keep starting blankly with my mouth slightly open. I know what's going on around me most of the time, I just need to tune out a bit so I can keep going all day. I got sick of explaining all the time after we'd been together for years. Some people, I guess, simply cannot or will not accept neurodiverse people.

[Girl_On_Fire]

Anybody else walk on their tip-toes as children?

[Ursy]

Anybody else walk on their tip-toes as children?

Yes! My mother thought I was going to be a ballerina. She signed me up for ballet classes. I only went to one. Lol. Poor mum.

[Bit]

That one doesn't apply to me... I would have fallen over, even then, lol... no sense of balance at all!

[Girl_On_Fire]

Yeah, I don't have much balance either. I trip over air too. lol! But yes, I definitely walked on my tip-toes all the time. I didn't even know that was an Aspie trait until I talked to another Aspie. I've learned more from talking to other Aspies than anything I've learned from books.

Speaking of books though, has anyone read, "Pretending to Be Normal" by Liane Holliday Willey and Tony Attwood? When I read it, it changed my life. It literally describes the way I view the world. I was 100% convinced after that.

[Girl_On_Fire]

The message you have entered is too short. Please lengthen your message to at least 10 characters.

*bump*

[Ursy]

Yeah, I don't have much balance either. I trip over air too. lol! But yes, I definitely walked on my tip-toes all the time. I didn't even know that was an Aspie trait until I talked to another Aspie. I've learned more from talking to other Aspies than anything I've learned from books.

Speaking of books though, has anyone read, "Pretending to Be Normal" by Liane Holliday Willey and Tony Attwood? When I read it, it changed my life. It literally describes the way I view the world. I was 100% convinced after that.

I read it a long, long time ago. I think it was really good, from memory. But I don't have much of a memory anymore. I used to have a fabulous memory, but I got misdiagnosed as bipolar a few years ago (before I realized I was Aspie) and spent a few months on Lithium, and I think my brain has never been the same since.

I'm pretty clumsy too. I "fall off my shoes" quite regularly, even ones that are only a couple of inches high :/

My ankles are really paying for that, now that I'm getting older.

[Girl_On_Fire]

Does anyone here sigh a lot? I do it all the time and it's a self-comfort thing but people are always mistaking it for being irritated or subtly trying to display displeasure and I don't even realize I do it until somebody points it out.

[Ursy]

Does anyone here sigh a lot? I do it all the time and it's a self-comfort thing but people are always mistaking it for being irritated or subtly trying to display displeasure and I don't even realize I do it until somebody points it out.

I probably do. I think it's a form of stimming. I also make random noises, sometimes to ward off unpleasant thoughts, but mostly when I know nobody else is around.

[Venus007]

I sigh a lot. For me it resets me, like "okay, done with this, on to the next"
it also comforts me in a way, I rub my forehead or my first 3 fingers together when I am alone but in public it is usually a sigh.

[Girl_On_Fire]

I rub my forehead too. Hmmmm....

[Fanbutch]

I have a lot of trouble telling the difference between reality and things I imagine or dream. Does anyone else have this problem?

[Ursy]

I have a lot of trouble telling the difference between reality and things I imagine or dream. Does anyone else have this problem?

Very occasionally I will have a dream that I thought was real until I woke up from it, and twice I had dreams that were incredibly real in that they were set in exactly the environment I was living in at the time, indistinguishable from real life. Those are freaky!

My imagination - not so much, though my imagination can affect me emotionally almost as much as if it was happening. For example, I can just imagine getting a phone call about a loved one dying and it will make me cry.

[Girl_On_Fire]

I have a lot of trouble telling the difference between reality and things I imagine or dream. Does anyone else have this problem?

I don't remember ever having an experience like that but I do have very intense dreams. I always have.

[Girl_On_Fire]

I wanted to try to bring this thread back if anyone is interested.

Are you an "emotional barometer"? I find myself reacting to people's emotions before they even realize they're feeling them, which can make for sometimes awkward social interaction. Meaning somebody may mistake my nervous response to them as being self-conscious or guilty of something when really my inner core is saying danger! I have a hair-trigger when it comes to feeling sudden negative emotion from others, even when it's not outwardly expressed right away. Anybody else feel this way?

[Ursy]

I wanted to try to bring this thread back if anyone is interested.

Are you an "emotional barometer"? I find myself reacting to people's emotions before they even realize they're feeling them, which can make for sometimes awkward social interaction. Meaning somebody may mistake my nervous response to them as being self-conscious or guilty of something when really my inner core is saying danger! I have a hair-trigger when it comes to feeling sudden negative emotion from others, even when it's not outwardly expressed right away. Anybody else feel this way?

I don't think I'm in touch with my own emotions enough to be able to tell where they are coming from at the time (intense though they are, does that sound ironic? I don't know how to explain it), and I don't trust how I read the emotions of others to be able to connect the two.

I kind of feel too much all at once, and it's so overwhelming that any introspection is difficult.

[Daktari]

...deal with misophonia on a daily basis and feel like a freak because of it?

[Ursy]

...deal with misophonia on a daily basis and feel like a freak because of it?

I commiserate.
I don't know if I can say I have misophonia but too much noise does give me the irrits, especially if I'm trying to concentrate on something.

This makes me sound like a Grinch, but why do children have to be so loud? Especially when they are walking past our house on a sleep-in morning?

[Kelt]

...deal with misophonia on a daily basis and feel like a freak because of it?

Very much so. I didn't know there was a special word for it though. It's a combination of noise in general, but specific frequencies are actually painful. I only feel like a bit of a freak if I am out in public and some sharp sound makes me involuntarily duck or quickly cover my ears when no one else seems to notice anything.

Gots ear plugs and knows how to use em. :)

[Girl_On_Fire]

...deal with misophonia on a daily basis and feel like a freak because of it?

Yes. I just learned there was a name for it the other day. I cannot stand the sound of mouth noises. Chewing, swallowing or dogs licking their chops. Bleecchh! Sends me into extreme sensory overload. I can only block out so much of it before I start feeling like my nerves are on fire.

****

On another note, I found this really great article about the innocence of autism. I really think that this can be an easily-misconstrued component of Asperger's syndrome and other developmental disorders. No matter our age, Aspies seem to tend to retain some of their childlike innocence. The things we do or the way we interact may seem socially quite immature but we're oblivious to it until we look up and see a disapproving or confused look. :blush:

Here is the article: http://geekysciencemom.tumblr.com/post/45143501654/the-innocence-of-autism-part-1

I'll never forget the time I was out with my ex and I saw this adorable frog hopping along on the sidewalk and I went running up to it cooing and I caught it. I was so very in the moment of innocence and my ex, embarrassed, ended up going back to the car to hide. It broke my heart.

In the second half of the article, it addresses the hurt that people on the spectrum feel when their real selves are seen and then rejected. It's the hurt of a child and not that of an adult with hurt feelings. It's such a complete and whole hurt. It's like the world ended. That's how children feel and that's how adults on the spectrum feel as well.

Here is the quote: "People’s behavior didn’t match their words, so I was hurt many times. There have been many times that the hurt I felt was that of a child, not the hurt that an adult experiences."

How has your innocence/child-like tendencies affected you and your relationships whether personal or professional?

[ManOMan]

I find this thread very interesting. I have ADHD...so reading all of the responses is way too overwhelming. I am also a HSP.

I found a book (and the author) called "Scattered" by Gabor Mate, MD.
The book is about ADHD and he includes things that I would never have
associated with it. He also has it (and his kids) and he has some very interesting ideas about it's origin.

Frankly I'm only half way through it. I get very overwhelmed when reading it, it has pushed my buttons. I've cried a lot. I have yet to get to the part where he addresses how to handle this.

I've had the pleasure of meeting him a couple of times. He has a heart of gold and truly cares.

If you have ADHD I highly suggest you pick up this book and give it a look.

[Girl_On_Fire]

Does anyone else find "Good morning" to be an intrusive/annoying greeting? I have always loathed the obligatory "Good morning" ritual. I'd rather say "Hello" and be the first to initiate social contact, especially in the morning. I don't wake up easily.

[Apocalipstic]

Does anyone else find "Good morning" to be an intrusive/annoying greeting? I have always loathed the obligatory "Good morning" ritual. I'd rather say "Hello" and be the first to initiate social contact, especially in the morning. I don't wake up easily.

I guess for me its habit now. :praying:

[Girl_On_Fire]

A fellow "Aspergirl" sent me this great blog post about the traits of female Aspies. It hit the nail right on the head for me. Can anyone (of the butch/femme/trans/other-identified) variety identify with what's written here?

Also, do you think gender identity or expression have an effect on the types of spectrum traits exhibited by individuals?

https://aspergersgirls.wordpress.com/2012/02/10/aspergers-traits-women-females-girls/

[Girl_On_Fire]

Ten Myths about Females with Asperger's Syndrome:

http://aspergersgirls.wordpress.com/2012/03/06/thirty-seven-10-myths-about-females-with-aspergers-syndrome/

[Signmypapyrus]

Not sure if I should post here since I don’t have ASD, but I am epileptic and I have a rare neurological disorder called mirror touch synesthesia. Neither are fun.

[Venus007]

It is always tricky for me as a neurodiverse woman to be seen as such. I am a dedicated actress, every day I put on my "normal" facade and go into the world. The older I get the more I chafe under the yoke of passing.

A fellow "Aspergirl" sent me this great blog post about the traits of female Aspies. It hit the nail right on the head for me. Can anyone (of the butch/femme/trans/other-identified) variety identify with what's written here?

Also, do you think gender identity or expression have an effect on the types of spectrum traits exhibited by individuals?

https://aspergersgirls.wordpress.com/2012/02/10/aspergers-traits-women-females-girls/

[Esme nha Maire]

A fellow "Aspergirl" sent me this great blog post about the traits of female Aspies. It hit the nail right on the head for me. Can anyone (of the butch/femme/trans/other-identified) variety identify with what's written here?

Also, do you think gender identity or expression have an effect on the types of spectrum traits exhibited by individuals?

https://aspergersgirls.wordpress.com/2012/02/10/aspergers-traits-women-females-girls/

Oh my giddy aunt! MOST of that describes me! This has given me extreme pause for thought. Thank you!