Big Butch Love

[Jet]

Let's talk about what it's like to be heavy, overweight or however you would like to refer to it.

Does it affect your self-esteem?
Does it prevent you from getting dates?
Do you feel unattractive to femmes?
Do you attract women to date?
Are you doing anything to lose weight?
Are you satisfied with how you look?
Do you have weight goals or not?
Are you happy and in love without weight ever being a factor?
Does your partner want you to lose weight or not?
Do others see you as lovable and sexy just as you are?


This is a general topic, and I'm just throwing out questions for discussion.
Feel free to jump in with your own thoughts and ideas.

[Andrew, Jr.]

My parents always called me fat to my face even when I was thin. I was barely 120 pounds until I got severely sick with pneu. and bronch. and was put on steroids, and hospitalized.

Sure I would love to be thin. Who wouldn't? That is what our society is all about these days. People are rude. They staire, point, and make very nasty remarks towards those of us who are overweight.

Personally, I am attracted to those who are overweight. It just makes me smile ear to ear. I love to read fat positive threads. I am tired of the medical community dissing those of us who are overweight. And I am really tired of our society putting so many under the bus for this or that. It just isn't right.

Good thread Jet. My hats off to you! :thumbsup:

[amiyesiam]

I guess my first question in these kinds of discussions is: Is the person starting the discussion thin or plus size?
Cause, nothing personal, but thin people telling me about being thin is not a positive experience.
Kind of like non diabetics telling me what I should or should not eat.
Or when straight people tell me how to be queer.


A lot of thin people don't like plus size people and make life harder for plus size people.

Cause ya know most people don't trash talk plus size people to their faces, just like racists usually keep their mouths shut around POC. It is amazing what they will say when there are no POC around.

just general rambling

[Jet]

Yes, well I'm overweight and can't see being attractive to anyone. I'm working on it. But it's beside the point. What really pisses of is that I have clothes that I can't get into. I need to see a doctor about cortisol levels. Lots of stressors in my life and I need to be checked out. Exercise isn't doing the trick.

[Write14u]

Let's talk about what it's like to be heavy, overweight or however you would like to refer to it.

Does it affect your self-esteem?
Does it prevent you from getting dates?
Do you feel unattractive to femmes?
Do you attract women to date?
Are you doing anything to lose weight?
Are you satisfied with how you look?
Do you have weight goals or not?
Are you happy and in love without weight ever being a factor?
Does your partner want you to lose weight or not?
Do others see you as lovable and sexy just as you are?


This is a general topic, and I'm just throwing out questions for discussion.
Feel free to jump in with your own thoughts and ideas.


In my early 20s, I had major self-esteem issues, but as I came out and settled down into who I am, they've gone away. I've learned to be comfortable in my skin. Does it mean I'm perfectly happy with myself? Absolutely not. For me, though, it is about being comfortable and not what society thinks. I've had the good fortune to have dated women who have loved my size and strength.
Right now, I'm not happy with my size because I left it drift up while dealing with drama and a crazy work schedule, but I'm working on it.
I've never dated anyone where my size was an issue and I've dated women of all shapes and sizes. I once dated a woman that I outweighed by 100 pounds and she had far more body issues than I did.
As for goals, mine right now is simply to get back down to what I consider a healthy range for myself.

[Andrew, Jr.]

:goodpost: Amiyesiam

[Dude]

Are you happy and in love without weight ever being a factor?
Yes
Does your partner want you to lose weight or not? No, she loves me for me. I would not be with someone who tripped about shit like that

Do others see you as lovable and sexy just as you are?I have no idea .I don't care about being sexy to anyone but her. Hopefully, there are a few people out there who think I'm lovable for my winning personality. :twitch:

I am not fat (but not exactly at my truly desired weight)so I probably should not have even answered this.
I felt compelled for some reason to answer the most important questions.

.


Ol' Jet,
Color me confused with this thread based on your statements in the Big girl thread. Also, I wonder if you see yourself as misrepresenting your present self/weight with your picture slide that's in your signature line? Are those current pictures?

[Dude]

I could have sworn I saw a post . oh well

I can only hope that no Big people ever consider getting with someone
who wants to help them work on their weight or anything else that the other
person deems worth fiximg.
Two different people in the Big girl thread said just that and wonder why the other person left?
Gee, I wonder.

[Jet]

Ol' Jet,
Color me confused with this thread based on your statements in the Big girl thread. Also, I wonder if you see yourself as misrepresenting your present self/weight with your picture slide that's in your signature line? Are those current pictures?

To respond to your question Dude, my photo's are 2008-09. I'm sorry my post confused you. I opened this thread for butches who may want to express themselves regarding weight. So I'm disappointed that you felt my post was inappropate in a thread that clearly focuses on*Big Butch Love. Personally, I'm sensitive about my weight because something is wrong medically. On another note, I was deeply involved with a BBW and don't feel its necessary to defend it any more than what I expressed in Big Girl Love. I'm sorry if my views are disagreeable. They weren't intended to offend anyone.

[IttyBittyFem]

My parents always called me fat to my face even when I was thin. I was barely 120 pounds until I got severely sick with pneu. and bronch. and was put on steroids, and hospitalized.

Sure I would love to be thin. Who wouldn't? That is what our society is all about these days. People are rude. They staire, point, and make very nasty remarks towards those of us who are overweight.

Personally, I am attracted to those who are overweight. It just makes me smile ear to ear. I love to read fat positive threads. I am tired of the medical community dissing those of us who are overweight. And I am really tired of our society putting so many under the bus for this or that. It just isn't right.

Good thread Jet. My hats off to you! :thumbsup:


:goodpost:

Great Post Andrew. It saddens me to know any individual experienced criticism from their own parents. Throughout our entire lives, we still seek their consistent approval.

Discrimination, in any format is tormenting. As a self proclaimed Pollyanna, I proudly am of the belief our world could benefit enormously with positive input, starting with one individual at a time. Should the time ever come where I find myself in the position to be the 'first in line', I optimistically accept the challenge as my own responsibility in hopes the world views the glass half full . . .

Arwen says it best, so please permit me to quote her :bowdown: "Seek Joy Ya'll".

[Andrew, Jr.]

Dear Itty,

Thank you for your love and support. It reminded me of a saying by Mother Teresa "We can do no great things, only small things with great love."

You have to remember my father was verbally abusive. His tongue was sharp as a knife. And my mother was no better. I could write a book about the things that would come out of their mouths...just horrible. The scars last a lifetime. Now that they are elderly, I just pity them. I pray for them. That is about all I can do for now.

Love,
Andrew

[Jet]

:goodpost:

Great Post Andrew. It saddens me to know any individual experienced criticism from their own parents. Throughout our entire lives, we still seek their consistent approval.

Discrimination, in any format is tormenting. As a self proclaimed Pollyanna, I proudly am of the belief our world could benefit enormously with positive input, starting with one individual at a time. Should the time ever come where I find myself in the position to be the 'first in line', I optimistically accept the challenge as my own responsibility in hopes the world views the glass half full . . .

Arwen says it best, so please permit me to quote her :bowdown: "Seek Joy Ya'll".



Great post.

[Lady Jewel]

Just so I understand, you get a "get out of jail free" card because your weight is related to medical issues? So that means the rest of us with weight issues dont? And as I recall in the other thread you were incensed that the woman misrepresented herself online if Im not mistaken and yet you post an old pic of yourself??? Ya know if it walks like a duck...you know the saying. I am sure you wont be able to own this Jet, but I think it takes a LOT of chutzpah to go into the Big Girl thread and be insensitve to weight issues and then start this one. Think about it. But Im sure you have the perfect defense for this. What you did in that other thread was hurtful to a lot of women. Just own it. And Mods, if I stepped out of line, Im sorry. But Im only saying what everyone has been grumbling about. Us fat chicks choke on a lot of shit in our day to day lives and and I just cant swallow this one down.

Jewel




To respond to your question Dude, my photo's are 2008-09. I'm sorry my post confused you. I opened this thread for butches who may want to express themselves regarding weight. So I'm disappointed that you felt my post was inappropate in a thread that clearly focuses on*Big Butch Love. Personally, I'm sensitive about my weight because something is wrong medically. On another note, I was deeply involved with a BBW and don't feel its necessary to defend it any more than what I expressed in Big Girl Love. I'm sorry if my views are disagreeable. They weren't intended to offend anyone.

[Jet]

June, let me thank you for stepping knowing the real story behind the scene we talked about.

I want to clarify: This is about butch body image and weight issues.
My earlier post about my personal relationship with a BBW should have no relevance here, but I'll clarify anyway: I loved her for her, without figuring her weight into the equation. I was never incensed about her weight, just surprised since I had met her sight unseen. Nowhere did I say I was incensed.

Attractive is attractive regardless of weight, I've made that clear in earlier posts. My belief is that its how you present and carry yourself. Now, I apologize again if my posts or stance has tipped the insult scale. I didn't mean to offend anybody whatsoever.

And for the record, my pics are as current as 10.09 and I look like shit without a get out of jail FREE card. I have issues with my weight and I'm trying to deal.

[Kast]

Hey Jet - do you think you can stay out of trouble for 5 minutes out here at a time, buddy? I doubt it - that's what you get for revealing anything personal about yourself - why put yourself in this vulnerable, word-swapping game?

You say and intend one thing and it will always be turned around by the ones who have never heard your voice, how you speak, what your values are... those that don't know you. There's always two sides to every story and they are going to pretend like they know what the other side is, regardless of reality... so why put yourself out here as a target? Censor yourself - that's what they are asking - don't give any personal opinions, for crying out loud, speak in vagueness... in third person. As in...

I once knew this guy who worked out regularly, was into body building... and then hit mid-life - and then whammy - it happened! and he became very disillusioned, concerned that something was medically wrong... he felt as if he wasn't as attractive to the femme's anymore, it bothered his self-esteem... blah, blah...

Ok, ok... lol - I told you what I did when I gained too much weight. What was too much weight for me, well - that's personal... we all have an ideal body weight and know when our knees are hurting from carrying too much, our heart is working too hard, we don't fit into our clothes, we can't physically do what we used to be able to...etc. in some cases, such as yours might be - it could be a variety of things? For starters, you need your blood titer levels looked at first to see what's going on there and then make decisions based on what they say.

And, as far as finding a girl who is going to love you just the way you are... have faith - she's out there somewhere...

[Jet]

Hey Jet - do you think you can stay out of trouble for 5 minutes out here at a time, buddy? I doubt it - that's what you get for revealing anything personal about yourself - why put yourself in this vulnerable, word-swapping game?

You say and intend one thing and it will always be turned around by the ones who have never heard your voice, how you speak, what your values are... those that don't know you. There's always two sides to every story and they are going to pretend like they know what the other side is, regardless of reality... so why put yourself out here as a target? Censor yourself - that's what they are asking - don't give any personal opinions, for crying out loud, speak in vagueness... in third person. As in...

I once knew this guy who worked out regularly, was into body building... and then hit mid-life - and then whammy - it happened! and he became very disillusioned, concerned that something was medically wrong... he felt as if he wasn't as attractive to the femme's anymore, it bothered his self-esteem... blah, blah...

Ok, ok... lol - I told you what I did when I gained too much weight. What was too much weight for me, well - that's personal... we all have an ideal body weight and know when our knees are hurting from carrying too much, our heart is working too hard, we don't fit into our clothes, we can't physically do what we used to be able to...etc. in some cases, such as yours might be - it could be a variety of things? For starters, you need your blood titer levels looked at first to see what's going on there and then make decisions based on what they say.

And, as far as finding a girl who is going to love you just the way you are... have faith - she's out there somewhere...

You're a great pal, Kam :goodpost: and I appreciate the advice. You know me always jumping in head first. Thanks for coming in with your much appreciated .02.

[Jett]

Hey Jet - do you think you can stay out of trouble for 5 minutes out here at a time, buddy? I doubt it - that's what you get for revealing anything personal about yourself - why put yourself in this vulnerable, word-swapping game?

You say and intend one thing and it will always be turned around by the ones who have never heard your voice, how you speak, what your values are... those that don't know you. There's always two sides to every story and they are going to pretend like they know what the other side is, regardless of reality... so why put yourself out here as a target? Censor yourself - that's what they are asking - don't give any personal opinions, for crying out loud, speak in vagueness... in third person. As in...

I once knew this guy who worked out regularly, was into body building... and then hit mid-life - and then whammy - it happened! and he became.. *snip*.
Kam, I think there's enough tinder around here that throwing gas isn't necessary.

I know you're probably trying to stand by Jet's side but considering the circumstance I don't think get people re-riled is going to help.

I get that what you've said sometime happens... but there's also where misunderstandings get fixed through a little honest explanation and open mindedness... moving on leaving space for people to be able to get back to business at hand.

That'd be great to see in this thread.

Metropolis

ETA: Your post was not reported but I'm (semi)-moderating it at my own discretion as it seems to me to be purposely inflammatory

[TIMBERWOLF]

Im a larger Butch and yes just like a lot of us , wish i weighted less then i do. I never seemed to have a problem finding a date/partner in my life, but I also prefer women with some meat on their bones. I have had partners that were skinnier than I, but prefer to have them around my wt.
TIMBER

[Kast]

Kam, I think there's enough tinder around here that throwing gas isn't necessary.

I know you're probably trying to stand by Jet's side but considering the circumstance I don't think get people re-riled is going to help.

I get that what you've said sometime happens... but there's also where misunderstandings get fixed through a little honest explanation and open mindedness... moving on leaving space for people to be able to get back to business at hand.

That'd be great to see in this thread.

Metropolis

ETA: Your post was not reported but I'm (semi)-moderating it at my own discretion as it seems to me to be purposely inflammatory

I am speaking personally to my good buddy, did he seem inflamed?, no - it calmed him down - my intention. We have created a thread to talk to one another as how we normally speak in our everyday conversations on a particular topic... what are you asking?

[Jett]

I am speaking personally to my good buddy, did he seem inflamed?, no - it calmed him down - my intention. We have created a thread to talk to one another as how we normally speak in our everyday conversations on a particular topic... what are you asking?

I understand you were speaking to your good buddy... and I'm not asking anything Kam, as a moderator of this forum I was speaking to you about your post I felt was inflammatory to the immediate situation at the time you made it... specifically these lines...

- that's what you get for revealing anything personal about yourself - .............

............You say and intend one thing and it will always be turned around by the ones who have never heard your voice, how you speak, what your values are... ..................

There's always two sides to every story and they are going to pretend like they know what the other side is, regardless of reality...

Censor yourself - that's what they are asking - don't give any personal opinions, for crying out loud, ...........

You may have been speaking to your good buddy... but you were speaking about "they they they".. so your comments were hardly limited to him.

If you have any further questions about this feel free to PM me, and as I said allow this thread to get back to it's original intention.

Metropolis

[Kast]

Jet - You remember how I told you that I got up to 210 or so at one time, I carried the weight ok, but, had always been around 160 or so and decided to diet? And, BTW - I read an article recently where exercise has little to do with weight loss... what do you think about that? When I lost the 1 - 2 1/2 pounds each week for a year to get back to where I had been for years, exercise was not a part of the weight loss program.

It's all in what you eat and when. I incorporated a "modified-Atkins" as I call it - it worked for me. You have to cut back on the carbs to send the body into the fat reserves. I drank a 1 carb shake for breakfast, not all the time but some of the time, my biggest carb meal for lunch and more protein than carbs at night... and any of the non-carb foods anytime that I wanted to.

There's even this guy who has a diet out now that I think should work too, where you eat low carbs two days on and on the third day you eat what you want to. Losing weight is a slow and gradual process, if you do it too quickly, it's a shock to the body and painful - once you start steadily going into the fat reserves, the body gets used to it and accepts it.

I know you started a special diet a while back, Jet... tell us about it?

[Jet]

Well, the first thing that I think is blowing my dieting are my PTSD meds, the side effects are weight gain— BIG TIME. Secondly, I know my my cortisol is out of control. The reason I hit the weights more now is because muscle "eats" fat if you will. So everything is in conjunction with everything else, yanno? I'm not giving up, but I really think I need a doc's advice on some things. And I totally agree with your diet which is why I've gradually cut my carbs way down.

[Kast]

When you told me what you were eating... I knew you were headed for trouble, but - what can we do but be supportive, you were 'hot to trot' on this new diet... and I'm not the type to say... 'I told ya' so!'

You've got to eat 1 piece of bread a day and that's it - in the bread department, I remember that much... and very little sugar, and eat the pasta for lunch... and it'll hurt like hell - your body will think you're starving and hold onto your fat reserves for the first week or so... and then it starts accelerating when it gets used to the fact that your aren't dying afterall... lol

You have to look at genetics too... I had a tall, skinny father, and my brother who is 10 years older is all lean... but, me and my sister look like football players.

So, are your meds making you want to eat more?

[Cyclopea]

This is less like "Big Butch Love" and more like "Butch Fat Panic".
Not feelin' the love, yo.
:crybaby:

[Kast]

This is less like "Big Butch Love" and more like "Butch Fat Panic".
Not feelin' the love, yo.
:crybaby:

Well... there are other threads... do you have any 'love' to contribute or just driving by to shoot, Cyclopea?

[MrSunshine]

WTF?..........

[Admin]

All:

Folks need to stop picking at each other and engage with one another thoughtfully.

I know this thread is a difficult subject, especially when, clearly, we are all not at the same point in our journey. We are all going to have to recognize this in order to coexist.

Fat is a touchy subject because some folks turn it inward. It becomes self-hatred, something to be excised, worked out, exorcised even.
For others, fat isnt evil or ugly. It is just a part of their existence.

It is often very button-pushing for folks who dont have a problem with their body size to see other folks having a problem with their own body size. Especially if they are fat.
It pushes buttons because it says to them "Well hell, if they hate their OWN fat that much, what do they think of mine?"

This is one angle to consider. Not the only angle.

I also want to say that this thread is entitled "Big Butch Love". I suggest that we all need to find positive ways to show love for Big Butches.

There is a great amount of support for Big Butches to be found in this community. Let's make sure we are seeking support in ways that dont hurt. Learning to love yourself is a journey and it is often scary. Tell the truth and reach out...and be kind when doing so.

On a final note, we have had multiple reported posts from this thread tonight. I want everyone to TALK to one another. Stop sniping. Stop shutting down. And stop thinking you have all of the answers.

Much Love,
Admin

[Cyclopea]

Well... there are other threads... do you have any 'love' to contribute or just driving by to shoot, Cyclopea?

Yes, I have plenty of love to contribute. I try to love my body - or as someone said geniusly somewhere "my earth vessel" for all it's flaws and foibles. I thought that's what this thread was for. There are plenty of threads and venues on this site for weight loss support. The title of this thread "Big Butch Love" promises enjoyment and acceptance of the bigger butch. Perhaps even a place for those who enjoy a big butch. All this talk about desperately needing to diet for butches who are moderately chubby? Not at all the same as loving big butches. Does that make sense?

[Lady Jewel]

Gawd I wub you Cyclo :):aslIloveyou:




Yes, I have plenty of love to contribute. I try to love my body - or as someone said geniusly somewhere "my earth vessel" for all it's flaws and foibles. I thought that's what this thread was for. There are plenty of threads and venues on this site for weight loss support. The title of this thread "Big Butch Love" promises enjoyment and acceptance of the bigger butch. Perhaps even a place for those who enjoy a big butch. All this talk about desperately needing to diet for butches who are moderately chubby? Not at all the same as loving big butches. Does that make sense?

[Jet]

Yes, I have plenty of love to contribute. I try to love my body - or as someone said geniusly somewhere "my earth vessel" for all it's flaws and foibles. I thought that's what this thread was for. There are plenty of threads and venues on this site for weight loss support. The title of this thread "Big Butch Love" promises enjoyment and acceptance of the bigger butch. Perhaps even a place for those who enjoy a big butch. All this talk about desperately needing to diet for butches who are moderately chubby? Not at all the same as loving big butches. Does that make sense?

It makes perfect sense. But my discomfort over my weight issue does equate or apply to someone else. My weight is NOT OKAY with me; it's costing me money for new clothes and something is wrong medically that needs to be addressed. These are valid points in my life, not yours[/U] and I resent the comment fat panick when it could be a health issue at 53. I'm entitled to set standards for my life and my body, alone, no one else's. The thread was started to see how butches might see, feel and express themselves as butches on the subject of weight. And yeah, I am positive for them no matter what they look like. Weight, looks and other surface noise would never enter into a friendship with them or treat them in any manner that made anyone feel "less than". But having been made to feel that way today myself, I'll step out and leave this thread to y'all who are supportive and loving towards big butches.

[LieslKate]

Just dropping by to give a shout out to all those yummy and delish Butches of more than average proportions... not that I don't like slimmer Butches but there is nothing more comforting than being wrapped up and sheltered in the arms of ... well, yanno :eyebat:

[Kast]

Yes, I'm sorry, Cyclopea... I didn't realize you thought the thread theme was supposed to be carried out in a specific and certain way... you're absolutely right. I think I'll bow out too, maybe there's a coloring book in the Arcade that allows us to color outside the lines?

[Cyclopea]

It makes perfect sense. But my discomfort over my weight issue does equate or apply to someone else. My weight is NOT OKAY with me; it's costing me money for new clothes and something is wrong medically that needs to be addressed. These are valid points in my life, not yours[/U] and I resent the comment fat panick when it could be a health issue at 53. I'm entitled to set standards for my life and my body, alone, no one else's. The thread was started to see how butches might see, feel and express themselves as butches on the subject of weight. And yeah, I am positive for them no matter what they look like. Weight, looks and other surface noise would never enter into a friendship with them or treat them in any manner that made anyone feel "less than". But having been made to feel that way today myself, I'll step out and leave this thread to y'all who are supportive and loving towards big butches.

My intent is not to attack you. And I should have tread more gently entering a thread where you already felt defensive. I respect your feelings and your weight loss and health needs. I think the dissonance started with the title of the thread which promised enjoyment and acceptance of big butches. In that regard, striving to be different than as one is, rather than to be loved as one is, is in disagreement with the title of the thread. I hope that makes sense. Again, no disrespect was intended to you, and I apologize for posting bluntly. I wish you the best, and hey, maybe if some Big Butch Appreciation follows this rocky start, it may be healthy for even moderately chubby butches who are freaked and despairing at age related or other changes, to see that some appreciate them just how they are.
Thank you for listening.
I am butch, btw. But generally Butch Love-ers come in all stripes.

[Cyclopea]

Just dropping by to give a shout out to all those yummy and delish Butches of more than average proportions... not that I don't like slimmer Butches but there is nothing more comforting than being wrapped up and sheltered in the arms of ... well, yanno :eyebat:

Thank you darling!
:heartbeat:

[Lady Jewel]

Mmm me too Kate. I love them fluffy bois :)




Thank you darling!
:heartbeat:

[T D]

Interesting thread. It also seems to be darn near full of angst of all types.

2 things I know for sure; 1) Mood stabilizing medications generally cause weight gain. This can be quite uncomfortable for those who don't normally gain weight. 2) Life changes drastically in ones 50's, especially if your post menopausal. Menopause in general creates tremendous changes in the female body. It's not necessarily a lot of fun, and not the same for everyone.

Having said these things, it seems to me that if one feels like they're fat (really and truly), feels uncomfortable in their skin, and doesn't like it, then why not bring it to a forum as a topic to discuss. Just my opinion of course. Like many of you I don't find Jet overweight, but then again I haven't seen a recent photo apparently. I think it's how Jet "feels" that counts the most in his post.

Anyway, I've been overweight most of my life. I've had times when I didn't like it, felt uncomfortable, lacking in confidence, etc. But I remember at some point in my life realizing that not everyone is attracted or in liking of everyone else, and we really have no control over that. Sooooo, if someone was gonna like me they were just gonna like me how I am, and for who I am. Quite honestly I've never had a problem meeting people who are attracted to me, so I have to say I don't think size really has much to do with it. However I DO know how size can effect our own self esteem.

Meanwhile, this past year I decided that I was just plain sick and tired of not being able to select clothing (clothing that I LIKE) right off the rack, buy shirts that didn't hang down to my knees, and paying the "fat tax" on top of this for said clothes. I'm losing weight, and that's that!

My size has never been a deciding factor in who I date. I've dated women who weighed 100lbs soaking wet, and women who weighed over 200lbs, and everything in between. Who we're attracted to is just plain and simply who we're attracted too, period!

Stepping down now ;)

[Jet]

My intent is not to attack you. And I should have tread more gently entering a thread where you already felt defensive. I respect your feelings and your weight loss and health needs. I think the dissonance started with the title of the thread which promised enjoyment and acceptance of big butches. In that regard, striving to be different than as one is, rather than to be loved as one is, is in disagreement with the title of the thread. I hope that makes sense. Again, no disrespect was intended to you, and I apologize for posting bluntly. I wish you the best, and hey, maybe if some Big Butch Appreciation follows this rocky start, it may be healthy for even moderately chubby butches who are freaked and despairing at age related or other changes, to see that some appreciate them just how they are.
Thank you for listening.
I am butch, btw. But generally Butch Love-ers come in all stripes.

Your post is welcomed and accepted and I'd like to shake hands on it in our respect and words toward one another. Thanks.

[WolfyOne]

I think I'm just going to kick back, read a while and see where this thread goes. I'm not a big butch, but I am overweight for my height. I've hit middle age spread and then some. I know what I have to do to keep myself healthy, but that would mean giving up what I enjoy.

[Jet]

Interesting thread. It also seems to be darn near full of angst of all types.

2 things I know for sure; 1) Mood stabilizing medications generally cause weight gain. This can be quite uncomfortable for those who don't normally gain weight. 2) Life changes drastically in ones 50's, especially if your post menopausal. Menopause in general creates tremendous changes in the female body. It's not necessarily a lot of fun, and not the same for everyone.

Having said these things, it seems to me that if one feels like they're fat (really and truly), feels uncomfortable in their skin, and doesn't like it, then why not bring it to a forum as a topic to discuss. Just my opinion of course. Like many of you I don't find Jet overweight, but then again I haven't seen a recent photo apparently. I think it's how Jet "feels" that counts the most in his post.

Anyway, I've been overweight most of my life. I've had times when I didn't like it, felt uncomfortable, lacking in confidence, etc. But I remember at some point in my life realizing that not everyone is attracted or in liking of everyone else, and we really have no control over that. Sooooo, if someone was gonna like me they were just gonna like me how I am, and for who I am. Quite honestly I've never had a problem meeting people who are attracted to me, so I have to say I don't think size really has much to do with it. However I DO know how size can effect our own self esteem.

Meanwhile, this past year I decided that I was just plain sick and tired of not being able to select clothing (clothing that I LIKE) right off the rack, buy shirts that didn't hang down to my knees, and paying the "fat tax" on top of this for said clothes. I'm losing weight, and that's that!

My size has never been a deciding factor in who I date. I've dated women who weighed 100lbs soaking wet, and women who weighed over 200lbs, and everything in between. Who we're attracted to is just plain and simply who we're attracted too, period!

Stepping down now ;)



Well TD, I'm about ready to post a pic from december and they suck. About clothes, I struggle...dress clothes for my work are expensive, or they can be and it's disheartening to buy clothes and find a month later I can't wear them. It's rapid weight gain and I'm concerned. I'd like to throw on a pair of bib overalls and be done with it, but i can't corporate style.
Thanks for participating in the thread.

[Cyclopea]

Your post is welcomed and accepted and I'd like to shake hands on it in our respect and words toward one another. Thanks.

Reciprocated.
Thank you.
On to Big Butch Appreciation!

[LieslKate]

YAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY to pics... lotsa Butch pics plz... I NEED perv time... *fans*

:praying::twitch::innocent:

[apretty]

love and appreciation for butches of all size--providing they're lovely people on the inside.

the trouble i have with the thread resides only in the *name* of the thread because it seems to speak about/to/for people 'of size' and the tone and subsequent posts by the OP read more like: 'my sudden weight gain/my medical issue'.

rarely do 'big butches' find themselves in this kind of situation where they woke up one morning *fat* (speaking from my big-girl place), more than likely this has been a much longer road that we've navigated and it feels like, for me, someone is trying to facilitate from his place of 'recent weight gain' the *life* we've spent a lifetime *living* (which, generally speaking, would be his *privileged place*)

which is not to say that the original questions aren't valid--i was just *expecting* a fat-butch-love-song (thread).

size matters. ;)

[Jet]

love and appreciation for butches of all size--providing they're lovely people on the inside.

the trouble i have with the thread resides only in the *name* of the thread because it seems to speak about/to/for people 'of size' and the tone and subsequent posts by the OP read more like: 'my sudden weight gain/my medical issue'.

rarely do 'big butches' find themselves in this kind of situation where they woke up one morning *fat* (speaking from my big-girl place), more than likely this has been a much longer road that we've navigated and it feels like, for me, someone is trying to facilitate from his place of 'recent weight gain' the *life* we've spent a lifetime *living* (which, generally speaking, would be his *privileged place*)

which is not to say that the original questions aren't valid--i was just *expecting* a fat-butch-love-song (thread).

size matters. ;)

You're right, it took twists and turns on my part certainly, hopefully we're getting it straightened out.

[WhiteTigress]

I can only hope that no Big people ever consider getting with someone
who wants to help them work on their weight or anything else that the other person deems worth fiximg.

Dude,

I have to say that this in and of itself is a single-viewed and insulting statement. I am coupled with TIMBERWOLF. Shi's a larger butch. I'm a larger femme. We're both diabetics. Shi'll tell you that I'm not perfect, but I'm a healthier eater than shi is.

When I do and say things to help hir change eating habits and lose weight, it's for the purpose of getting hir health in better order, so that I can love hir even more years. It's not based on a desire for hir to look better or behave differently, just to eat healthy to live longer.

If someone want's to change a partner for selfish reasons, I can say that you might be on track, but don't paint all of us with such broad brush strokes.

WT

P.S. I've dated someone who weighed far more than 100 pounds less than I, and our break-up had NOTHING to do with size. The woman she took-up with after me, was also a person of size, and fairly comparable to myself.
Im a larger Butch and yes just like a lot of us , wish i weighted less then i do. I never seemed to have a problem finding a date/partner in my life, but I also prefer women with some meat on their bones. I have had partners that were skinnier than I, but prefer to have them around my wt.
TIMBER

Honey,

I'll never be a super-model, so you know I'll always have some cushioning, but you've been trying to broaden your mind to consider and include more healthy alternatives, and I'm proud of you for that.

You realize that the only reason I want any changes, is so that I can have you in my life for the longest number of years possible.

Me

[Andrew, Jr.]

I am a very heavy guy, and am working on keeping my lost weight off, and also loosing some more weight. I have diabetes (inheritated from my father and his side of the family), and have been helped out by White Tigress and Timber a great deal. I have a fatty liver, glaucoma, kidney disease, and some other seriously related diseases. I blame it all on hereditary diseases. Not so much on my weight.

I just couldn't grasp what the doctors and the educators were telling me. If Timber and White Tigress didn't help me, I know I would be on insulin now. Instead, I have come off pretty much most all of my diabetic pills now! My hat is off to those to forever and ever. They stuck by my side, and did everything from emailing me, pming me, calling me, and faxing me information, and got me on the right track. I will never be thin. I will be living a bit longer, I hope. The only reason will be because of what I am choosing to put in my mouth, keeping track of my meds, and staying in touch with my doctors.

I went to educational classes that once you are diagnosed with diabetes, you are encouraged to attend. There is no diet for diabetics, but the educators show you what to eat, how to eat, and how to break down the numerous diets that are out on the market today. I still cannot figure all of those. In turn, I eat what I want too. Obviously, I am not eating cookies, processed foods, or fast foods. But I am selecting healtier choices. I know Taco Bell is advertising a Drive Thru Diet. Then there is Jared who sponsors Subway. I am sponsored by Timber and White Tigress.

As for my younger days, I can remember how cruel adults were to me...being in gym class and being weighed in. My weight was called out for everyone to hear. I don't know if they still do it today. I hope not. That sure didn't help my self-esteem.

I also would love to buy clothes off the rack. I can't. I shop at Big & Tall shops. I also hit online stores like Casual Male XL, Kingsize Direct or Living XL.

When Rosie's niece got married last year, I wore a tux. We were photographed, and of course there were the remarks about my weight once the photographs of me came out. I was speechless. That wedding was such a wonderful time for everyone. Yes, I know I am fat. I don't need anyone to tell me that. It isn't like I don't know it. But to have someone look at me in a picture and then ask me when am I going on a diet? Sheesh. That just makes me cry. My entire life that is about all I have ever been told...gee you're fat. Well, no shit. Get over it.

[TIMBERWOLF]

And Thank God I have WT in my life that helps me think about my choices. sure we both are diabetics,and yes I have CKD stage 4. Yes we both will eat things that maybe we shouldn't, but its a treat not a every day thing. She loves salads and i don't. I wish i did.I have decided to incorporate more fish into my diet and also more chicken. I have a lot of pork in the fridge that we cook up every once in a while. Im having red meat tonight. We don't eat red meat as much as I would like but i don't need it. As far as diets...........small meals.WT isn't changing me , she is helping me with what i eat, and no she doesn't yell at me for eating something, she doesn't talk about my wt because my wt goes up and down.My top wt was 281 when I was out trucking, its went down to 256, but im at 260 right now.
I had a ex wife that was skinny,and she would "pinch a inch" and think she was fat. I wonder what she thought of me even at 240 .
Nope Im comfortable with who and what i am and if someone doesn't like it they can eat dirt and die ...
TIMBER

[Selenay]

Just as a by the way, Timber, I was really not a salad fan until I found the right dressing. It's not my favorite, still, but it's way more bearable with the right something to slather on it.

[Jet]

I'm having salad tonight after my workout—I'm sick to death of them.

[T D]

I LOVE salads, especially with lettuce and spinach, other goodies, and spicy asian peanut dressing from TJs :)

[daisygrrl]

I LOVE salads, especially with lettuce and spinach, other goodies, and spicy asian peanut dressing from TJs :)



Yup, that's the key for me: the goodies. Adding a variety of colors to spruce up the salad helps make it more appealing & tasty. :koolaid:

[WolfyOne]

I agree, salads are great when you add healthy extras. It's like eating a buffet in a bowl.

[Leigh]

As for my younger days, I can remember how cruel adults were to me...being in gym class and being weighed in. My weight was called out for everyone to hear. I don't know if they still do it today. I hope not. That sure didn't help my self-esteem.

When Rosie's niece got married last year, I wore a tux. We were photographed, and of course there were the remarks about my weight once the photographs of me came out. I was speechless. That wedding was such a wonderful time for everyone. Yes, I know I am fat. I don't need anyone to tell me that. It isn't like I don't know it. But to have someone look at me in a picture and then ask me when am I going on a diet? Sheesh. That just makes me cry. My entire life that is about all I have ever been told...gee you're fat. Well, no shit. Get over it.


Hi everyone,

Mainly I wanted to come in here and thank everyone for appreciating us bigger butches. We're often gonna derail threads of size because someone said something that didn't sit well with us, or the topic got thrown wayyyyyy off line for one reason or another but I think when it comes down to it we need to support one another and not bring each other down. Its hard enough being bigger without any of us bickering back and forth about words said or things being misconstrued. Ultimately I believe the bottom line is whatever our situation is, no matter what the reason may be as to why we are overweight or what we are doing to change said situation, we need to support one another :thumbsup:

I quoted part of Andrew's post above because so much of it resonates with Me. I remember going to gm class during school and being so afraid to change in the change room with the rest of the girls that I would change in the washrooms instead just to avoid the finger pointing, stares and name calling. They never weighed us (thank goodness) but I always remember how often I would skip gym just so that I didn't have to change into shorts and a t-shirt to run around in front of My fellow classmates. That whole part of My life really played a huge part in how truly crappy My self-esteem has always been, and still continues to be today.

I've had pictures taken of Myself as well at various functions and been told that I'm overweight/fat etc. I wonder if they ever stop to think that I live with that fact every single day of My life, and that I really dont need to be reminded of it at every turn. I'm constantly being told how overweight I am, how I'll never find anyone who will love Me or want Me due to My weight, blah blah blah .......... it really just pisses Me off. Yes I'm fat but if your going to call Me out on it doesn't that just mean that your mouth is fatter than My entire body? My father, other members of My family and people in general like to get on My case about My being overweight but they never stop to think about how their words affect Me.

I'm here and I'm fat, I take up space and I'm in your face ~ learn to deal with it people!!!!!!! :dance2:

[Jet]

Hi everyone,

Mainly I wanted to come in here and thank everyone for appreciating us bigger butches. We're often gonna derail threads of size because someone said something that didn't sit well with us, or the topic got thrown wayyyyyy off line for one reason or another but I think when it comes down to it we need to support one another and not bring each other down. Its hard enough being bigger without any of us bickering back and forth about words said or things being misconstrued. Ultimately I believe the bottom line is whatever our situation is, no matter what the reason may be as to why we are overweight or what we are doing to change said situation, we need to support one another :thumbsup:

I quoted part of Andrew's post above because so much of it resonates with Me. I remember going to gm class during school and being so afraid to change in the change room with the rest of the girls that I would change in the washrooms instead just to avoid the finger pointing, stares and name calling. They never weighed us (thank goodness) but I always remember how often I would skip gym just so that I didn't have to change into shorts and a t-shirt to run around in front of My fellow classmates. That whole part of My life really played a huge part in how truly crappy My self-esteem has always been, and still continues to be today.

I've had pictures taken of Myself as well at various functions and been told that I'm overweight/fat etc. I wonder if they ever stop to think that I live with that fact every single day of My life, and that I really dont need to be reminded of it at every turn. I'm constantly being told how overweight I am, how I'll never find anyone who will love Me or want Me due to My weight, blah blah blah .......... it really just pisses Me off. Yes I'm fat but if your going to call Me out on it doesn't that just mean that your mouth is fatter than My entire body? My father, other members of My family and people in general like to get on My case about My being overweight but they never stop to think about how their words affect Me.

I'm here and I'm fat, I take up space and I'm in your face ~ learn to deal with it people!!!!!!! :dance2:

Great post Braedon; a lot of courage to share your experiences in here. Thanks for coming in and know that you're appreciated here. I'm not saying that to turn this thread around, I'm saying from me personally to you..

[Legendryder]

I have read through this thread, and although I am not a large person, I so totally understand the teasing and lack of self-esteem issues. Growing up, I was the only gay, the only native looking one, the only one who was different. I wasn't the cookie cutter high school girl. I rode dirt bikes, dressed in overalls, didn't give one good shit what you thought and would tell you so in a New York minute. And I caught hell for it. Got the shit kicked out of me more times than I can tell you about. But you know what? It didn't change me one fucking bit. I still skate that friggin' jagged edge, and could care less what anyone thinks about it.

And, you know what? These days, I am thankful for it. Cause I grew up tough, and I take no shit. Scars. You bet your ass I got em. Inside and out. But, it has never made me less than I am, no matter what I look like. Big, small, who the hell cares. We all carry our own load. The trick is to carry YOUR OWN, not what someone else throws on your stack. If you feel good, physically, and your doctor is telling you go are good to go, then you are good to go. If your doctor is telling you something else, put on your big girl panties and deal with it. Pain in the ass, sure. But, are you worth eating salads?

I mean, think about it. If you go to the doctor, and they tell you to eat a strict diet, are YOU worth it? Is it something out of the relm of possibility? So, I know, crusing through the drive-thru at McDonalds is handy and all, but, hey, they serve salads too. I was heavy at one time in my life, I got that way driving long haul trucking, sitting on my butt doing nothing but holding the wheel and it came down to changing how I lived. Totally. I came to understand that I WAS worth the pain in the ass it took to change. Once I got used to what it took, I just stuck with it.

Anyhow, I feel you all. I hope I didn't piss anyone off, but, if I did, it wasn't on purpose. I just think you all can be whatever you see yourself being. And if that is heavy, so be it. As long as you are comfortable in your own skin, then fuck anyone who says different.

That would be my two cents.

[Leigh]

Great post Braedon; a lot of courage to share your experiences in here. Thanks for coming in and know that you're appreciated here. I'm not saying that to turn this thread around, I'm saying from me personally to you..


Thank you My friend, I appreciate you as well bud :thumbsup:

[Rockinonahigh]

The weight thingy is a pain to deal with in so many ways I would like to just tell ppl to get over the issue and deal with it in constructive ways insted of all the negative bs that we deal with.I wasnt always a big guy,untill ten years ago I kept my weight somewhere about 165 sometimes I would get a ten pound up in the winter but not much more.Back then I was doing some really hard physical work on a daily basics..then I had an acdent and hurt my back.I went from being insanely busiey to flat on my back in a traction for a while..the meds I was on as well as being inactive,oh hell I blew up like a baloon.To say over the years I have played a bad game of roulett with the injury cause I wont have back surgery cause 99% of the time it dose more harm than good.Last spring I near fell out when the scale said 218...no,no,no says I not an ounce more if I have to wire my mouth shut and drink from a straw.I got it down to 249,but being I quit smokeing dureing the fall right before the hollidays I gained back ten pounds,grrrrr.Really going back to being thin has never been my goal,geting healthy is.I accept the fact that im going to be chunky for the rest of my life but need to be healthy about it.
To those folks who gripe at us big guys for our weight all I have to say is...becareful cause they can easly be right where we are before they know it,when and if thet happends I do hope they remember how they treated others..bad karma is a bitch.
Rockin

[TIMBERWOLF]

Just as a by the way, Timber, I was really not a salad fan until I found the right dressing. It's not my favorite, still, but it's way more bearable with the right something to slather on it.
Actually WT has found that its the green taste and smell that I don't like. I think it taste like dirt myself, but I have eaten a couple of salads in my life at company party's at really nice restaurants . I love this buttermilk ranch that WT makes and it tastes a lot like Denny's Ranch.I think it was butter lettuce or something like that i liked.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Yesterday I had a 10 yo little boy come up to me in my doctor's office and say to me "gee you're fat". There was dead silence in the room. Most were reading magazines, and really not paying any attention to the children there. However, when he said this...everyone looked up. The mother did not move or say a word. I said yes, I am. And what you just said was very rude. Who is your mother? Well, that got things rolling. The mother thought she was going to start an argument with me over her child being nasty in public. I was not about to let it go. Eventually, three other adults got involved in this heated chat (lets call it that), and she and her kids left. Funny isn't it how kids follow adults lead? I just wonder about civility anymore. It seems to have gone way side anymore.

[apretty]

it's not a child's fault for making a comment that he probably hears at home. a simple, 'it's inappropriate/it's hurtful to make that kind of comment.' and *not reacting* like your whole world fell apart would be better than a huge confrontation.

or, you could just tell the kid, 'NO YOU'RE FAT!' because as adults we get to win this argument being louder and taller, FINALLY!

[KayCee]

Yesterday I had a 10 yo little boy come up to me in my doctor's office and say to me "gee you're fat". There was dead silence in the room. Most were reading magazines, and really not paying any attention to the children there. However, when he said this...everyone looked up. The mother did not move or say a word. I said yes, I am. And what you just said was very rude. Who is your mother? Well, that got things rolling. The mother thought she was going to start an argument with me over her child being nasty in public. I was not about to let it go. Eventually, three other adults got involved in this heated chat (lets call it that), and she and her kids left. Funny isn't it how kids follow adults lead? I just wonder about civility anymore. It seems to have gone way side anymore.

Obviously the mother has failed. A child that age should know what to say or not. Sadly, it's the modern form of up bringing these days..to look away..to ignore..kids don't know their boundaries anymore.

[Andrew, Jr.]

I agree. Kids and some adults have no clue as to what is acceptable and not any longer. It is like people using cell phones in the movies or during Church services. I find it so very rude. I have no interest in listening to their conversation. Otherwise, I would ask them to let me in on it (like a conference call). Civility has gone wayside. Just like our economy, it is down the toilet.

[Andrew, Jr.]

The last time I was in public, I was called this by 2 army soldiers. I was dropping off a few things that were to be delivered to Haiti. Now, I have 2 speeds - slow & slower. Just how it is. The soldiers did not see me walk up. And had no clue I walk slowly.

There were soldiers everywhere, and of all ranks/positions. Well, some upper ranked men heard this, and pulled the 2 soldiers off the box collection, and were dismissed immediately. I was given an apology, and asked if I had time to tour the base, and have lunch with them. I declined. I was just wayy to embarassed.

I think being called any derrogatory name is the same as being called a fag, queer, or whatever. It is not meant in a favorable light. It is meant negatively. That is what needs to change in this country. And to think that most folks are overweight, and to have to deal with folks like Dr. Oz on TV who just goes on tangents about being overweight. It makes my blood boil. Personally, I am sick and tired of it all. I want to be told I am handsome. I want to hear that I smell so good. I want to hear that I am a snappy dresser. I want to hear the nice things. Not the ugly stuff all the time. It wears me down.

I just had to vent. Thanks for listening.

Andrew

:bbq: :waterski: :fishing:
:pipe: :cigar:

[casey35]

To me I dont care if u slim jim or a beautiful gorgous butch femme mtf ftm . To me people should see what inside you . The personality , the humor , the whole self. To me i think people with love handles are gorgous.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Casey35,

That right there is the problem. It is few and far between. Not too many have the mindset like you. Society is anti-fat, yet 3/4 of society are fat. I just don't get it. Thank you for your kind words.

Namaste,
Andrew

[casey35]

people just see what on tv and if u notice all is slim jim. You dont see the gorgous full body people. Like i tell my friends if they dont like you or what they see then that their problem not yours.:snowysmiley:


andrew here a statement i heard from a doctor, Just because people maybe larger in body does not mean they are unhealthy. They was comparing two people one that was slender and one that was full bodied. they ask the audience who they thought was the most healthy. most pick the thin one. they was wrong it was the one that was full bodied, so people need to take note.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Casey35, (f)

Thank you for telling me that. It sure did brighten my day! :happyjump:

Andrew
ox
:farmer: :cheerleader: :clap:

[Rockinonahigh]

Brother Andrew,so sorry u had some ahole jerk make stupid comments like that.Buddy u bet in a fue years they will be pot bellied and bald as an egg,then I hope they remember the comments cause someone will shure say something to them at some point.Please keep doing the good things u do for folks as well as being the al around good person u are.

Casey35...I had a simular thing happen a fue years ago when I was going to college,the school had a nurseing program and they were doing a segment on healthy vs heavy.I was ask to be a part of the study 6 average fit ppl and 4 ppl that were in various sises of the heavy end of the scale.Out of it all the 4 heavyest out did 5 of the others in stamania,blood pressure,respitorey recovery on and off the tredmill as well as strength in lifting,pulling ,pushing ect.Recently I went to the doc for a chekup and my bp is 110/70,my lab work is as good as a healthy 35yro,repitory on the money(at least till everything blooms in the spriong ..then i'm toast)...even tho I still weigh 245 I have lots more muscel mass than is aparent...not to bad for 62yro.

Rockin

[bigbutchmistie]

Wow. I didnt see this thread here. Until now. :) Bump. I hope everyone is enjoying their Phat Tuesday

[hpychick]

love your quoteWow. I didnt see this thread here. Until now. :) Bump. I hope everyone is enjoying their Phat Tuesday

[bigbutchmistie]

:) Thank You

[bigbutchmistie]

Good Morning Peeps :) Hope everyone has a good Thursday

[bigbutchmistie]

BUMPITY BUMP :)

[Andrew, Jr.]

Where do the heavy guys go to buy their rash guard shirts for the beach? I end up wearing dark t-shirts. It works best for me.

When I was slimmer I could buy them off the rack at surf shops. Not any longer.


:beachkids::tanning::sailing::fishing::waterski:

[bigbutchmistie]

Where do the heavy guys go to buy their rash guard shirts for the beach? I end up wearing dark t-shirts. It works best for me.

When I was slimmer I could buy them off the rack at surf shops. Not any longer.


:beachkids::tanning::sailing::fishing::waterski:


I dont know Andrew... I dont even attempt to go swimming. I loved it when I was thinner. Havent done it in years.

[Galahad]

Underworks has a compression swimsuit, tank and shorts. I don't know if you can get the pieces separately or not. Would one of the compression tanks in black work for swimming?

[Andrew, Jr.]

Galahad,

They don't have my size. I have a compression shirt I wore for years and years, but it eventually wore out. But swimming, the material doesn't hold up. You have to have material that will repeal water. Remember I am a chubby guy.

Thank you for the advice dear brother. :cowboy:

Namaste,
Andrew

[fiercegrrl]

i saw andrew's post earlier today about looking for a rashguard. so i started looking around (i have a lot of time on my hands these days so i make a good researcher!!!) and i have found a few. so no excuses to not enjoy the beach or a pool!
-nicole

this first site has quite a few options but here is one-
http://www.solartex.com/servlet/the-487/Stingray-Men%27s-Plus-Size/Detail

land's end has some options
http://www.landsend.com/ix/swimwear-swimsuits/Swim/Men/Rashguards/index.html?seq=1~2~3~4&catNumbers=644~646~659&visible=1~2~1~1&store=le&sort=Recommended&pageSize=12&tab=6

http://www.landsend.com/pp/ShortSleeveActiveRashGuard~191512_57.html?bcc=y&action=order_more&sku_0=::BLA&CM_MERCH=IDX_00006__0000000655&origin=index

[Andrew, Jr.]

How do you know the size from UK vs US? Is it a size up or down?

Thank you for the links! I will be looking into these! WooHoo!

[Andrew, Jr.]

Fiercegrrl,

I found it! It is a bit expensive, but I am going to have to save up for it. Thank you! :bowdown:


:theisland:

[Rockinonahigh]

Andrew,I get spandex t-shirts to wear as a binder and wear it under my t'shirts they repel water very well.Just make shure u dont get them so tight u cant breath,the only prob I had was they rolled up so I cut the spandex short enough to hold thigs in place but not to short..it will sitll roll some but works fine..I weigh 250 so u should be able to get them at acadamy or some place like it.I got mine at wally world for ten dollars each.They also have spandex shorts but I found them not to be comfortable.

[Nikki]

i saw andrew's post earlier today about looking for a rashguard. so i started looking around (i have a lot of time on my hands these days so i make a good researcher!!!) and i have found a few. so no excuses to not enjoy the beach or a pool!
-nicole

this first site has quite a few options but here is one-
http://www.solartex.com/servlet/the-487/Stingray-Men%27s-Plus-Size/Detail

land's end has some options
http://www.landsend.com/ix/swimwear-swimsuits/Swim/Men/Rashguards/index.html?seq=1~2~3~4&catNumbers=644~646~659&visible=1~2~1~1&store=le&sort=Recommended&pageSize=12&tab=6

http://www.landsend.com/pp/ShortSleeveActiveRashGuard~191512_57.html?bcc=y&action=order_more&sku_0=::BLA&CM_MERCH=IDX_00006__0000000655&origin=index

Thanks for posting this,I didn't know they made them bigger!

[Andrew, Jr.]

I love wearing jean shorts and swim trunks in the summer. Knowing I can go swimming is just adding to my joy. Thanks everyone!


:theisland:

[gotoseagrl]

http://serve.mysmiley.net/love/love0001.gif (http://www.mysmiley.net)

[Andrew, Jr.]

Bump


:mohawk:

[Leigh]

Bumping the thread up again :)

[Rook]

~ Bump

:canoworms:

[Leigh]

Just trying to get this thread up and going again :fastdraq:

[kfemme]

Not sure if I'll be alot of help getting the thread to an active status again but I will say I have always loved big butches! Now just make it a big butch daddy and you have perfection for me! I don't want to make anyone feel less about themselves bc they aren't a big gorgeous butch specimen (especially since I know what it feels like to be made to feel less about myself bc of size) but I want to celebrate the handsome butches out there who are sexy as hell and who are alot of femmes dream come true! Nothing better in my mind than a big butches arms around me! (nothing yummier or more comforting)

just my .02,
kfemme

[gotoseagrl]

Not sure if I'll be alot of help getting the thread to an active status again but I will say I have always loved big butches! Now just make it a big butch daddy and you have perfection for me! I don't want to make anyone feel less about themselves bc they aren't a big gorgeous butch specimen (especially since I know what it feels like to be made to feel less about myself bc of size) but I want to celebrate the handsome butches out there who are sexy as hell and who are alot of femmes dream come true! Nothing better in my mind than a big butches arms around me! (nothing yummier or more comforting)

just my .02,
kfemme

i second that!! :thumbsup:

http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc191/mikamavvers/blush-anim-cl.gif

[Leigh]

Not sure if I'll be alot of help getting the thread to an active status again but I will say I have always loved big butches! Now just make it a big butch daddy and you have perfection for me! I don't want to make anyone feel less about themselves bc they aren't a big gorgeous butch specimen (especially since I know what it feels like to be made to feel less about myself bc of size) but I want to celebrate the handsome butches out there who are sexy as hell and who are alot of femmes dream come true! Nothing better in my mind than a big butches arms around me! (nothing yummier or more comforting)

just my .02,
kfemme

See, this is why I love this thread ~ I love hearing about how femmes love us big butches/guys, it always puts a smile on My face :D

Thank you for this kfemme, very sweet :bunchflowers:

i second that!! :thumbsup:

Glad you agree mxxi :bunchflowers:

[princessbelle]

Not sure if I'll be alot of help getting the thread to an active status again but I will say I have always loved big butches! Now just make it a big butch daddy and you have perfection for me! I don't want to make anyone feel less about themselves bc they aren't a big gorgeous butch specimen (especially since I know what it feels like to be made to feel less about myself bc of size) but I want to celebrate the handsome butches out there who are sexy as hell and who are alot of femmes dream come true! Nothing better in my mind than a big butches arms around me! (nothing yummier or more comforting)

just my .02,
kfemme

i second that!! :thumbsup:

http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc191/mikamavvers/blush-anim-cl.gif

I'll third it!!!!

[Leigh]

I'll third it!!!!



Of course I think you rawk, so this rawks too :bunchflowers:

[ravfem]

Not sure if I'll be alot of help getting the thread to an active status again but I will say I have always loved big butches! Now just make it a big butch daddy and you have perfection for me! I don't want to make anyone feel less about themselves bc they aren't a big gorgeous butch specimen (especially since I know what it feels like to be made to feel less about myself bc of size) but I want to celebrate the handsome butches out there who are sexy as hell and who are alot of femmes dream come true! Nothing better in my mind than a big butches arms around me! (nothing yummier or more comforting)

just my .02,
kfemme

i second that!! :thumbsup:

http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc191/mikamavvers/blush-anim-cl.gif

I'll third it!!!!


jumpin on the bandwagon, cause that's how i roll!
:byebye:

[Leigh]

jumpin on the bandwagon, cause that's how i roll!
:byebye:


Another reason why I think you rawk hun, Massive is very lucky indeed :bunchflowers:

[Massive]

Thank you Braedon, I happen to know and think that I am incredibly lucky!
:cheesy:

[kfemme]

See, this is why I love this thread ~ I love hearing about how femmes love us big butches/guys, it always puts a smile on My face :D

Thank you for this kfemme, very sweet :bunchflowers:

I am glad that I could bring a smile to your face, since you make me smile quite a bit in the House with how sweet you are to me and all of the rest of the girls there! Thank you so much for that and please don't ever change!


[QUOTE=Massive;131947]Thank you Braedon, I happen to know and think that I am incredibly lucky!
:cheesy:

Massive, I'm glad you know how lucky you are...I think you and ravfem are both soo lucky! You seem to have something that I have been dreaming about for a long time! I don't want to be a pain but I just had to mention that.

Take care both of you and very big hugs,
kfemme

[ravfem]

Massive, I'm glad you know how lucky you are...I think you and ravfem are both soo lucky! You seem to have something that I have been dreaming about for a long time! I don't want to be a pain but I just had to mention that.

Take care both of you and very big hugs,
kfemme



aw, that's sweet, thank you! *hugs you* We are indeed both lucky to have found each other. Massi truly is an amazing person, and i happen to know that *i* am the luckier one of us :cheesy:

[Massive]

aw, that's sweet, thank you! *hugs you* We are indeed both lucky to have found each other. Massi truly is an amazing person, and i happen to know that *i* am the luckier one of us :cheesy:

And My babygirl's always right! Thank you kfemme!

[Leigh]

I am glad that I could bring a smile to your face, since you make me smile quite a bit in the House with how sweet you are to me and all of the rest of the girls there! Thank you so much for that and please don't ever change!

If I can bring a smile to a pretty face such as yours hun, then I would never change that because I love making people smile. I love knowing that us big butches/guys are appreciated, and I hope you ladies know that we appreciate and adore you as well :rrose:

aw, that's sweet, thank you! *hugs you* We are indeed both lucky to have found each other. Massi truly is an amazing person, and i happen to know that *i* am the luckier one of us :cheesy:

I love watching you and Massive interact in the House and all other threads too :D

And My babygirl's always right! Thank you kfemme!

Nothing wrong with a good "yes dear" to bring a smile to all faces :cheesy:

[kfemme]

If I can bring a smile to a pretty face such as yours hun, then I would never change that because I love making people smile. I love knowing that us big butches/guys are appreciated, and I hope you ladies know that we appreciate and adore you as well :rrose:

Well thank you very much! That really is very sweet to say...and I know that as a larger femme it is nice to hear! I'm sure you are one wonderful Big Butch Daddy! :wine:




I love watching you and Massive interact in the House and all other threads too :D

I have to say that although I get little twinges of jealousy every so often it is very heartwarming to watch you two together! I hope you have many fabulous years together!
:praying:



Nothing wrong with a good "yes dear" to bring a smile to all faces :cheesy:


I can definitely second that but you definitely did it in you own style Massive! No, surprises there either! I'm just really glad I am getting to know you :wine: and all of you!

very big hugs to two really great Big Butch Daddies and one wonderful femme,
kfemme

[lipstixgal]

I'm overweight but I'm doing something to help it . I do Jenny Craig which is only 1200 calories per day no easy task!! I don't like being 50 lbs overweight but it is what it is. I started school in September and the weight came on like that. Hopefully with my internship I will be moving a little bit more and losing the weight!! Good lUck to those trying to lose its a hard battle believe me. also my parents were verbally abusive about my weight as well and I was about 120 lbs at the time!!

[Andrew, Jr.]

Lipstickgal,

My parents, esp. my mother, was verbally abusive towards me about my weight growing up. I was very thin and extremely muscular. I was out playing football, tennis, lifting weights, and so on. I weighted maybe 100 pounds soaking wet in high school. Everything else was muscle. She was embarassed by me. I was the exact opposite of her ideals of what it was to be a girl/woman/female gender.

If I talk with them today, the entire conversation is just about my weight. Even if I tell them it is not a subject up for debate or discussion, they ignore it. It wasn't until a friend of theirs was in their home, and walked in on a heated conversation of ours, it would have still gone on. I no longer talk with them at all. It is how I survive mentally. As parents, they should be ashamed of themselves. But they are too mentally ill to even know it.

Andrew

[Leigh]

I get sick and tired of people constantly making My weight a big issue ~ yeah I know I'm fat, must you constantly remind Me about that? Many of us live with being overweight every single day and we're perfectly fine without going on crash diets or practically killing ourselves to lose weight, so leave us alone and let us go on with our lives :rant:

Sorry guys, I guess Andrew mentioning about his parents got Me on abit of a rant because My dad does the same thing with Me about My weight ......... so I'm just glad that this thread is here so that us bigger butches/guys will know that we are loved and appreciated by femmes just the way that we are :D

[lipstixgal]

Lipstickgal,

My parents, esp. my mother, was verbally abusive towards me about my weight growing up. I was very thin and extremely muscular. I was out playing football, tennis, lifting weights, and so on. I weighted maybe 100 pounds soaking wet in high school. Everything else was muscle. She was embarassed by me. I was the exact opposite of her ideals of what it was to be a girl/woman/female gender.

If I talk with them today, the entire conversation is just about my weight. Even if I tell them it is not a subject up for debate or discussion, they ignore it. It wasn't until a friend of theirs was in their home, and walked in on a heated conversation of ours, it would have still gone on. I no longer talk with them at all. It is how I survive mentally. As parents, they should be ashamed of themselves. But they are too mentally ill to even know it.

Andrew

Oh Andrew that's too bad that you can't even talk with your own parents. My parents were mentally ill too I think. MY mom passes away about 4 years ago and now I can be who I want to be fat or thin. Of course I prefer being thinner but that is not always my choice. I have hypothyroidism which making lose weight even harder. So does my dog and he is overweight and on a diet!!! Low fat food for him. Just be who you are and know that you are the best person you could be...

[Leigh]

very big hugs to two really great Big Butch Daddies and one wonderful femme,
kfemme

((((((((((((((((((((((((kfemme)))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))

Sending you back the biggest hug ever :bunchflowers:

Just be who you are and know that you are the best person you could be...

I definately agree with this ~ we can only be the best person that we can personally be, and if no one else likes it I say to heck with them!!!!

[Andrew, Jr.]

Ok, I have to post something here...I love & wear madras of all colors, in shorts and shirts. Most are from India, which I had no idea. And I also like them in all colors - red, navy, black, green, orange, and so on.

My second confession: I love & wear shorts with a pattern on them. For example, navy shorts with red crabs all over; or light blue shorts with martini glasses all over them, or seersucker shorts with lacrosse sticks crossed on them.

Smiling ear to ear,
Andrew

[Rockinonahigh]

Hello Andrew..Byddy I know how u feel about wild shorts,I feel the same about shirts..Hawiian shirts,I have a closet full of them,I get told they are a bit out of style but not to me,last year my cousin went there for vacation and brought me back six of the real deal...love em.

[Andrew, Jr.]

My 3rd Confession: Tropical or Haw. Shirts I have one or two. Well, they maybe outta style, but what the heck. I am 46 yo, so I just am going with the flow at this point. :hangloose:

[ravfem]

Ok, I have to post something here...I love & wear madras of all colors, in shorts and shirts. Most are from India, which I had no idea. And I also like them in all colors - red, navy, black, green, orange, and so on.

My second confession: I love & wear shorts with a pattern on them. For example, navy shorts with red crabs all over; or light blue shorts with martini glasses all over them, or seersucker shorts with lacrosse sticks crossed on them.

Smiling ear to ear,
Andrew


Hello Andrew..Byddy I know how u feel about wild shorts,I feel the same about shirts..Hawiian shirts,I have a closet full of them,I get told they are a bit out of style but not to me,last year my cousin went there for vacation and brought me back six of the real deal...love em.

we neeeeeeeed pictures!! please??

:threadneedspics:

and as far as "out of style"...who cares!?! i say, wear what ya like, not what others like! (this could be because i have never been "in style", but regardless...)

Have i mentioned we need pictures?? :cheesy:

[Rockinonahigh]

Well I have never been in style either,when I was showing horses everyone dresed like a cowboy except me when I wasnt rideing I wore wild tropical shorts n shirts and straw hat.Yep, a rebel even then,about pictures..well when I figure out how to work photo bucket I will gladly post a fue.

[Leigh]

we neeeeeeeed pictures!! please??

:threadneedspics:

and as far as "out of style"...who cares!?! i say, wear what ya like, not what others like! (this could be because i have never been "in style", but regardless...)

Have i mentioned we need pictures?? :cheesy:

I agree, us guys should post pics of our "out-of-style" styles :lol2:

I whole heartedly agree with rav; we should always wear what we like, not what others exect us to cuz ya know we're rebels like that :hangloose:

My 3rd Confession: Tropical or Haw. Shirts I have one or two. Well, they maybe outta style, but what the heck. I am 46 yo, so I just am going with the flow at this point.

If you like that style, no matter what the world thinks, wear it proudly bro :D

Well I have never been in style either,when I was showing horses everyone dresed like a cowboy except me when I wasnt rideing I wore wild tropical shorts n shirts and straw hat.Yep, a rebel even then,about pictures..well when I figure out how to work photo bucket I will gladly post a fue.

Yeah you should post pics bro, would be neat to see you rock your own style for the world to see and do so proudly :thumbsup:

[Cowboi]

Hello Andrew..Byddy I know how u feel about wild shorts,I feel the same about shirts..Hawiian shirts,I have a closet full of them,I get told they are a bit out of style but not to me,last year my cousin went there for vacation and brought me back six of the real deal...love em.


I don't think they ever go out of style!!!!

[Spoon]

I ha to get this post going again, so I could add my voice to those praising big, beautiful, butches. There is nothing like being on the arm of a big, strong butch & knowing I'll be in her arms that night!

[nycfem]

I ha to get this post going again, so I could add my voice to those praising big, beautiful, butches. There is nothing like being on the arm of a big, strong butch & knowing I'll be in her arms that night!

How very true! :moonstars:

[iamkeri1]

I have been plus size most of my life. I've had times when I was cool with it, and times that it caused me lots of pain. But regarding big butches - THEY are FINE! I agree with posters above who love to be escorted, held and loved by a wonderful big butch. The fire has tested you and made you stronger - I love that strength.
Many Smooches,
Keri

[Leigh]

One of My favorite threads has been revived and I'm so happy about that ~ it still shows Me that us big guys are appreciated and loved by beautiful women :cheesy:

[skeeter_01]

One of My favorite threads has been revived and I'm so happy about that ~ it still shows Me that us big guys are appreciated and loved by beautiful women :cheesy:



Amen brudda!! ;)

[femmebotdyke]

Interesting thread. I tend not to use the terms "obese" or "overweight" because I think that they are negative, pathologizing and unhelpfully position some bodies as normative and others as "deviant". I prefer "fat".

With regards to health, I prefer the HAES (Health at Every Size) approach as an alternative to weight-loss dieting, which I believe is unhealthy. I know a psychologist who specializes in eating disorders and she made the point in a recent interview that the very behaviours prescribed as solutions to those labelled ''overweight'' or ''obese'' are often the same practices she as a practitioner diagnoses in those with clinical eating disorders like bulimia and anorexia. I think part of the reason conversations like these are often very highly-charged is that it's difficult to separate out fat stigma from questions around body size and health. Anyway, there are growing number of resources available to fat people- many of them targeted to queer, lesbian, butch/femme and transgender audiences. If anyone's interested in fat-positive materials for butches of size, just message me.

As far as sexual attraction is concerned, I'm not attracted to fat or bigger butches in spite of their size but because of it. A big butch really turns my head and gets the juices flowing! Of course I'm not only attracted to fat butches and instant physical attraction isn't the only or even the primary characteristic I look for in a prospective partner but in a room of otherwise equally attractive butches, it's ze fat butch who attracts and holds my attention first.

[nycfem]

I love your post and so agree with you! I wish more people had this level of awareness.

Is the interview you mentioned online by chance? I am psyched to hear a psychologist make that point. Very cool :)

Interesting thread. I tend not to use the terms "obese" or "overweight" because I think that they are negative, pathologizing and unhelpfully position some bodies as normative and others as "deviant". I prefer "fat".

With regards to health, I prefer the HAES (Health at Every Size) approach as an alternative to weight-loss dieting, which I believe is unhealthy. I know a psychologist who specializes in eating disorders and she made the point in a recent interview that the very behaviours prescribed as solutions to those labelled ''overweight'' or ''obese'' are often the same practices she as a practitioner diagnoses in those with clinical eating disorders like bulimia and anorexia. I think part of the reason conversations like these are often very highly-charged is that it's difficult to separate out fat stigma from questions around body size and health. Anyway, there are growing number of resources available to fat people- many of them targeted to queer, lesbian, butch/femme and transgender audiences. If anyone's interested in fat-positive materials for butches of size, just message me.

As far as sexual attraction is concerned, I'm not attracted to fat or bigger butches in spite of their size but because of it. A big butch really turns my head and gets the juices flowing! Of course I'm not only attracted to fat butches and instant physical attraction isn't the only or even the primary characteristic I look for in a prospective partner but in a room of otherwise equally attractive butches, it's ze fat butch who attracts and holds my attention first.

[Leigh]

I love this thread :D

[nycfem]

And don't y'all forget to give some big love to the companion thread:

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1118


I love this thread :D

[Leigh]

And don't y'all forget to give some big love to the companion thread:

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1118


Of course not, can't forget our companion thread :D

[naturlover_52]

why is it that straight people especially women....therapists especially try to hmmmm get us to dress differently.

I am soft butch and I am MOST comphy in Tshirts w/ Sayings/characters and jeans and or shorts...and I don't always LOOK Shnazzy...GREAT.... and get looked at as IF I don't WANT to take care of myself. BUT I just don't know how to change...LOOK different AND I sure AS hell DON"T do make up.....

JUST asking and needing a lil advice....

Thanks....

:superman::piratelaugh:
:2butch::batman:
:reader::flying:

[naturlover_52]

I also wear solid colored shirts...and the winter hoodies....I am a soft BUTCH and this is how I am most comphy....JUST don;t know how to dress....the only word coming to mind is glamorous, BUT I am thinking,,,,Proper is the better term

thanks

[Wryly]

Hi all! Just thought I'd bump this up a bit.

[naturlover_52]

glad that U did
good to see you

take care

[Tcountry]

why is it that straight people especially women....therapists especially try to hmmmm get us to dress differently.

I am soft butch and I am MOST comphy in Tshirts w/ Sayings/characters and jeans and or shorts...and I don't always LOOK Shnazzy...GREAT.... and get looked at as IF I don't WANT to take care of myself. BUT I just don't know how to change...LOOK different AND I sure AS hell DON"T do make up.....

JUST asking and needing a lil advice....

Thanks....



I also wear solid colored shirts...and the winter hoodies....I am a soft BUTCH and this is how I am most comphy....JUST don;t know how to dress....the only word coming to mind is glamorous, BUT I am thinking,,,,Proper is the better term

thanks

I do get where you are coming from...I have everything in my attire from sweats and tanks to a soon to be suit...
I am most comfy in my work clothing (work boots, jeans, t-shirts and hoodies)...

A few soft butch things:
Have you tried polo shirts...same type of material as t-shirts but with a collar...
If a full button down shirt is not too butch than soft(I have no clue) then those are great with a solid t-shirt under them with the top 2-3 buttons undone(been told by a few femme's that's yummy...lol)...
Darker blue jeans look sharper than lighter colored...
hoodies are ok...solid colors best(no rips/holes/stains...even tho my fav is this way...not best in public...lol)
They make sweatshirts and sweaters that have a zipper at the top...still a pull over but a little more "style" than just a hoodie...

Just a few suggestions of course...and my own personal opinion...Just trying to take what you said you are comfy in and spruse it up a little ;)

[bigbutchmistie]

Im just the "boi next door" I wear cargo shorts alot with t shirts and a cap, or polo shirt and jeans. To work its cargo pants/ polo shirt. Im a big boi but I feel sexy as hell... :) I just love it when a femme thinks big butches are sexy....

[kookybroad]

I must say there is nothing more exciting then being with a butch that is confident and comfortable with the person they are. I do love the bigger, confident butch, and I love falling asleep and waking up in those strong arms.

Sending out a big HELLO to all those that make my heart flutter!

[naturlover_52]

I do get where you are coming from...I have everything in my attire from sweats and tanks to a soon to be suit...
I am most comfy in my work clothing (work boots, jeans, t-shirts and hoodies)...

A few soft butch things:
Have you tried polo shirts...same type of material as t-shirts but with a collar...
If a full button down shirt is not too butch than soft(I have no clue) then those are great with a solid t-shirt under them with the top 2-3 buttons undone(been told by a few femme's that's yummy...lol)...
Darker blue jeans look sharper than lighter colored...
hoodies are ok...solid colors best(no rips/holes/stains...even tho my fav is this way...not best in public...lol)
They make sweatshirts and sweaters that have a zipper at the top...still a pull over but a little more "style" than just a hoodie...

Just a few suggestions of course...and my own personal opinion...Just trying to take what you said you are comfy in and spruse it up a little ;)



thanks Bud
right now I don't have the money for new clothes. looking for a job and such and most of my stuff has holes in it. Only have 2 pairs of pants right now....because I went from being a Prince....to down and out in like 3 weeks.
Don't like Polo Shirts I don't do many things w/ a color
but learning...and for me for dress it would be slacks and some nice boots and a vest dress shirt and tie
:moonstars::hangloose::fastdraq::batman:

[naturlover_52]

I must say there is nothing more exciting then being with a butch that is confident and comfortable with the person they are. I do love the bigger, confident butch, and I love falling asleep and waking up in those strong arms.

Sending out a big HELLO to all those that make my heart flutter!

This is all new to me....soooo working on the confidence. I am a big teddy bear that has met her fellow butch to go through life w/ and has the attitude of if u don't like it than Fuck it.....I think that is a lil harsh but she is more my protector.

and yes...I understood what u meant.

[AnaLee]

I just wanted to pop in and give love and support to the big butches here and elsewhere in our universe. You are sooo attractive and sexy. Big shoulders, strong arms, tight jeans ... omg, now where IS my fan!

Sweet thoughts,
Ana

[CherylNYC]

I just wanted to pop in and give love and support to the big butches here and elsewhere in our universe. You are sooo attractive and sexy. Big shoulders, strong arms, tight jeans ... omg, now where IS my fan!

Sweet thoughts,
Ana

I couldn't agree with you more, Sis. I miss snuggling into a strong, broad shoulder and feeling securely enfolded in a big bear hug.

[musicman]

Thanking all the ladies/femmes that love us big butches :)

Gives me hope ;)

Musicman

[Nightshade]

And don't y'all forget to give some big love to the companion thread:

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1118


Just subscribed to both threads! Give me a butch or TG with presence who knows and appreciates a curvy woman any day!

[bigbutchmistie]

Im glad to see this thread again :) I had missed it... I love seeing all the femmes out there who love us big guys :)

[asphaltcowboi]

this is the first time ive seen this thread.. its good to see it.. tho i recently went from 280lbs to 210 at 5'10 im still built like a line backer.. ive always worried esp when i was at 280 that i was to big. that my size scared people away. i know there are some femmes that love the big butches. growing up i was fairly on the too skinny side lol and worried that some big butch would kick my ass if i didnt behave right. as an adult and a older butch im proud to join the ranks!

[Leigh]

I am SO very glad to see this thread again, missed it alot :)

[Miss Scarlett]

Here is what this Femme notices (in order of importance):

1 - eyes

2 - mouth, including smile

3 - hands

...

99 - body size

[Miss Scarlett]

There's so much more to us all than that number on the scale or the tags in our clothes. A short list of things that matter to me are:

1 - even tempered;

2 - mature, well-mannered, respectful and polite;

3 - personal appearance - as in well groomed;

4 - employed;

5 - emotionally secure/confident - no need to prove themselves to anyone or for any reason;

6 - sense of humour and loves to laugh;

7 - understands the difference between breaking and curbing this high spirited femme;

8 - loves conversation/discussion;

9 - loves animals; and

10 - not hung up on an ex (or exes) and/or will not let an ex move back back in, tell me after the fact and expect me to be OK with it all.

[stepfordfemme]

Here is what this Femme notices (in order of importance):

1 - eyes

2 - mouth, including smile

3 - hands

...

99 - body size




Not me!
If I see a big tall handsome (linebacker to use Cody's word :)) I'm done! I'm so in. Its the first thing I notice. Its just the presence and the way they can carry themselves. I love butches that are taller in particular. And if they look like a big farm boi or football player....I'm like melted butter. Broad shoulders are always a plus.Big strong arms & a tummy that I can use like a pillow when cuddling on the couch. Aww sure is nice to dream!

:cheer: Love to all the big butches! :lips:

[Leigh]

Its women like all of you that makes butches and guys like us keep fighting to be ourselves because we know that someone out there, somewhere, will love us for who we are ............. thank you :stillheart:

[storyofmylife]

:cheer: Big Butch Love :cheer:

:cheer: :cheer:

[Leigh]

I love this thread :heartbeat:

[AnaLee]

Hi all you sweet butches - just dropping in to give you some LOOOOOVE!!!

You handsome hunks are FINE by me.
Sweet thoughts,
ANA

[Merlin]

<< big butch here :sunglass:

[bigbutchmistie]

I'm loving this thread. Big Butch here. I like seeing all of the big butch adoring fans lol

[Rockinonahigh]

Reading this thread gives me hope that my chubby body wont turn off the beautiful women of the world.Yes,im a bit on the chunky side all of 258 and just triming down is what im doing cause I doubt I will ever be able to get back to my fighting weight of 165.I just want to be healthy even if chunky.

[Rocket Boi11]

I have a woman who tells me on a daily basis how sexy I am and she loves my body....gotta love that....

[clay]

Hi everyone: BBB here as well. I walk tall, stand proud, and and comfortable in my own skin, and confident in myself. I loved the attributes list Ms. Scarlett posted!!! Thank you, ma'am (in my best Rhett voice) as I bow.
Hope all of us find our truly beautiful femme someday....with eyes and heart wide open...I am...truly a BBB....Clay

[Heavenleahangel]

Reading this thread gives me hope that my chubby body wont turn off the beautiful women of the world.Yes,im a bit on the chunky side all of 258 and just triming down is what im doing cause I doubt I will ever be able to get back to my fighting weight of 165.I just want to be healthy even if chunky.

Hi, Rockin; Congratulations on trimming down to be healthier. You will need your new found energy when the lucky femme who wins your heart shows up! <wink>

[SoberBoi]

Rockin,

Size is transient...it is the inside that is constant....

I love to have a big strong butch, with a full rack if I can say that out loud, and strong yet caring arms and shoulders.

When I am on top (not always), I want something to grab onto...a full-figured boi with curves is nice.

What I find unappealing (for me myself) is someone who is too thin and I feel like I am sleeping with a waif. I want butch, but a butch woman.

Don't ever feel bad about who you are because life is not a dress rehearsal. You are who you are. I was 254 lbs at 5'6" and lost over 70 lbs.

I do not feel any different inside... I am still me. I don't look at others and say, why don't you lose weight?... no one did that to me. My wife (now deceased) looked at me just as sexually then as when she first met me (relationship was almost 20 years when she died).

It is attitude, esteem, confidence.... but, I will admit, at any weight, I prefer some arm muscles just because I have various fetishes (don't we all...).

I lost most of my weight through lifting free weights and making better food choices (replacing white sugar/white flour/white pasta with whole grains, more lean proteins and more veggies, etc).

I am who I am. If you love me, you love me for me. If you don't like what you see, get out of line, because you will be quickly replaced.... LMFAO

Happiness is more attractive than the waist line.

Of course, this is just one boi's opinion...

;)

[greeneyedgrrl]

so i have to say... i only read part of this thread... short attention span tonight! :D
but i think it's pretty fantastic. big love to all you hot big butches!
:cheer::cheer::cheer::cheer::cheer::cheer::loveBFP :

[msW8ing]

Just stumbled across this thread..lovin it...I totally agree with all the other big butch adoring femme's..gimme some big arms to melt into..makes me feel all safe and protected.

[msW8ing]

So Ummmm is this where I place my order for my very own big butch to hug and squeeze??:tease::drool:

[clay]

Bummmpity Bump Bump

[smouldering]

This thread has been much too quiet for much too long so I wanted to revive it, I am a curvy BBW who just adore BBB's and wouldn't mind seeing more action from those BBB's in this thread just to know ya'll are out here! ;)

[Inuus]

Thanks for reviving this thread. I guess I fit into this category. I'm 6' and about 225. Would like to see others post in this thread

[clay]

this here Big Butch is needing to "feel the love" from an appreciative femme....so come on out ladies...show us some love!

[CherylNYC]

this here Big Butch is needing to "feel the love" from an appreciative femme....so come on out ladies...show us some love!

Much love from NYC!!!!!

[clay]

Much love from NYC!!!!!

sweeetttt lady...thanks...I was really needing that tonight....have a great one...smiles...Clay

[smouldering]

((((big sexy butches)))) Big hugs to you all!!!

Hope everyone is enjoying their HUMP Day!!

[clay]

((((big sexy butches)))) Big hugs to you all!!!

Hope everyone is enjoying their HUMP Day!!

Thanks, smouldering! It is always so nice when big butches are appreciated!

[WomenMoveMe]

I suppose I should chime in here. At 6' and 180 lbs...I have been called a moose...a linebacker...a mutant...and a wealth of other not so endearing names. It is so very nice to know that there are those that would find my stature not only attractive...but desirable! Thank you...you have no idea how nice it is to know this!!

[CherylNYC]

I suppose I should chime in here. At 6' and 180 lbs...I have been called a moose...a linebacker...a mutant...and a wealth of other not so endearing names. It is so very nice to know that there are those that would find my stature not only attractive...but desirable! Thank you...you have no idea how nice it is to know this!!

Uhhh... You've just described a stature that makes me swoon.

[starryeyes]

Mmmm! I love me some big butches!! :-D Thanks for making me feel safe, loved, warm and amazing! <3

[funkyfemme]

6' and 180 lbs

*thud*.................

[smouldering]

*thud*.................

What funkyfemme said.. hubba hubba ;)!! :wine:

[Novelafemme]

I suppose I should chime in here. At 6' and 180 lbs...I have been called a moose...a linebacker...a mutant...and a wealth of other not so endearing names. It is so very nice to know that there are those that would find my stature not only attractive...but desirable! Thank you...you have no idea how nice it is to know this!!


Shame, shame, shame on people for calling you names. That makes me so sad. My partner is almost 5'11" and just under 200lbs. and I adore every inch of her! She is VERY athletic and played water polo in highschool and is incredibly strong. If she gets under 175lbs she looks almost sickly, so big looks beautiful on her. She also carries herself very confidently and with grace. So, YES...here's a salute to you big, beautiful butches. This femme appreciates all of you. :bunchflowers:

[chai~]

Not me!
If I see a big tall handsome (linebacker to use Cody's word :)) I'm done! I'm so in. Its the first thing I notice. Its just the presence and the way they can carry themselves. I love butches that are taller in particular. And if they look like a big farm boi or football player....I'm like melted butter. Broad shoulders are always a plus.Big strong arms & a tummy that I can use like a pillow when cuddling on the couch. Aww sure is nice to dream!

:cheer: Love to all the big butches! :lips:

Oh, I am swooning over your description of a tall big butch!

halla~lou~yer!!!!!

*fannin self*

Love to be able to sit on a lap that won't buckle. Arm draped around strong shoulders, eye level....and kiss level~

[SugarFemme]

For me, I REALLY like a butch who is comfortable in hys or her own BIG skin. That they don't try and make themselves smaller or invisible due to size. That they take up as much "space" as they need. That they revel in their size. That I am only 5'1" and they are taller and bigger, helps me with that emotional illusion that they can "protect" me if needed. It also fuels my "Daddy" needs. Especially if they are a lot taller than myself. It fulfills me physically to feel that large presence looming over me. Nothing sexier than a big ole confident butch. How yummy is it to feel all that enveloping my being. For me, now that's power.

[chai~]

For me, I REALLY like a butch who is comfortable in hys or her own BIG skin. That they don't try and make themselves smaller or invisible due to size. That they take up as much "space" as they need. That they revel in their size. That I am only 5'1" and they are taller and bigger, helps me with that emotional illusion that they can "protect" me if needed. It also fuels my "Daddy" needs. Especially if they are a lot taller than myself. It fulfills me physically to feel that large presence looming over me. Nothing sexier than a big ole confident butch. How yummy is it to feel all that enveloping my being. For me, now that's power.

ditto and such a delicious way to put it!
I am all of 5 foot myself, so really, it doesn't take much to be taller than me! ;)

It's really a turn on to still have to look up while wearing heels!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v329/ashera1/311986_320657081294830_100000516216184_1285555_969 628641_n.jpg

[smouldering]

Peekin in to say hello to all the sexy big butches and other admirers :D

I am not so petite hehe I am 5'7 and have been taller then all but one of my partners.. but i don't mind so much about height.

Everyone keeping warm who are in the wintry areas? :tea::rrose:

[chai~]

Peekin in to say hello to all the sexy big butches and other admirers :D

I am not so petite hehe I am 5'7 and have been taller then all but one of my partners.. but i don't mind so much about height.

Everyone keeping warm who are in the wintry areas? :tea::rrose:

Cold here on the west coast of Canada, but we are a hearty bunch!

I've always wanted to be 5'6, always thought that was "just perfect", in the middle of short and tall.

Wasn't gifted that way, but my feet do reach the ground!

Happy Friday!!!!

[clay]

5'9" and "husky" BB here...blue eyed and a silver fox..........<smiles.
Thanks for all those femmes who adore us BB's!! THIS BB adores you all right back!

[smouldering]

Cold here on the west coast of Canada, but we are a hearty bunch!

I've always wanted to be 5'6, always thought that was "just perfect", in the middle of short and tall.

Wasn't gifted that way, but my feet do reach the ground!

Happy Friday!!!!

You are the same height as my daughter :)
It was a whole 3 degrees this morning with a -1 wind chill, Right now it is a whole whopping 18 degrees!
Hearty is good.. speaking of hearty this is the perfect weather for a good hearty soup!! :wine:

Everyone enjoy your afternoon!

[genghisfawn]

As a 5'10", 200lb femme with a Ukrainian plough-puller frame, I looooove a big butch with strong hands, warm arms and the confidence to wear hys body confidently and with passion for life, activity, intimacy and extracurriculars.

I never hate on anyone's body type. Bodies are beautiful with scars, absent limbs, breasts, no breasts, one breast, big butts, no butts, belly fat, ripped abs, dimples, puffy nipples, inverted nipples, big hands, slender hands, no hands, curved spines, damaged spines, military-straight backs, double chins, recessed chins, freckles, beauty marks, acne scars, stretch marks, pregnancy-stretched bellies, etc. Big, small and in between are all wonderful.

If you don't love your body, remember that someone out there most likely does. :)

[smouldering]

As a 5'10", 200lb femme with a Ukrainian plough-puller frame, I looooove a big butch with strong hands, warm arms and the confidence to wear hys body confidently and with passion for life, activity, intimacy and extracurriculars.

I never hate on anyone's body type. Bodies are beautiful with scars, absent limbs, breasts, no breasts, one breast, big butts, no butts, belly fat, ripped abs, dimples, puffy nipples, inverted nipples, big hands, slender hands, no hands, curved spines, damaged spines, military-straight backs, double chins, recessed chins, freckles, beauty marks, acne scars, stretch marks, pregnancy-stretched bellies, etc. Big, small and in between are all wonderful.

If you don't love your body, remember that someone out there most likely does. :)

Absolutely well said!!! :)

[istolurboxers38]

I know this was posted for butches, but femmes feel these things too.
I am overweight, trying really hard to loose some of it.
It makes me severly self conscious and unattractive
Yet I like a butch with some weight on them
I love someone who makes me feel comfortable in my own skin because then I start to be happier with myself
I was with a skinny person but the way I cook all the time and bake I put some weight on that person.
I do care about how I look and am not one that wears sleeping pants or even sweats in public. I just dont feel attractive and if anyone was to ever hit on me they would probably have to hit me on the head with a pan in order for me to get it. :glasses:

[Leigh]

I know that I'm definately a lover of big butches, and of course I'm not alone I know this :D

[aishah]

i love big butches SO much :) i love how strong, protective, and fucking hot you are. i love that you can make me feel safe and loved. i love how snuggly you are :) and just *fans self* big butches make me melt :)

[mm3girlyB]

i love big butches... i used to date the little studs that were my skinny ass size and mind you great bois but not what i needed... i need a gy that can pick all 135lbs of me... i like laying on that stong bicep when we cuddle... and sitting in hys lap when i need attention... i love the big hugs that wrap around me... i love big butches!!

[Leigh]

Gotta love big bois :)

[smouldering]

Big boi's make me purrrr just sayin :D

[socialjustice_fsu]

I know I am my happiest when I am partnered with a big butch. There is something to be said for their presence next to me. I want to literally look up to them and 'feel' them when they wrap their arms around me. I want the curves, the strength, the fullness that exudes love, protection, respect and presence.

Reaching over and simply running my fingertips across their being makes me only want more of them.

[CherylNYC]

I know I am my happiest when I am partnered with a big butch. There is something to be said for their presence next to me. I want to literally look up to them and 'feel' them when they wrap their arms around me. I want the curves, the strength, the fullness that exudes love, protection, respect and presence.

Reaching over and simply running my fingertips across their being makes me only want more of them.


What she said.

[clay]

Reading all the beautiful and loving posts you awesome ladies write...warms me...and as we fast approach Valentine's Day..the most commercialized day of the year as far as love and being with someone goes...just know I feel love every single day of the year...it isn't specific to just this one day..and when partnered..she will be MY Valentine..every single day of the year! I will never fail to show her that!!
This Big Butch doesn't know love only one day of the year..hy knows it all year, every day!! My heart beats every second of every day...with love....I heart all you lovely ladies who love us...always..Clay....one Big Butch

[Leigh]

Reading all the beautiful and loving posts you awesome ladies write...warms me...and as we fast approach Valentine's Day..the most commercialized day of the year as far as love and being with someone goes...just know I feel love every single day of the year...it isn't specific to just this one day..and when partnered..she will be MY Valentine..every single day of the year! I will never fail to show her that!!
This Big Butch doesn't know love only one day of the year..hy knows it all year, every day!! My heart beats every second of every day...with love....I heart all you lovely ladies who love us...always..Clay....one Big Butch


This is only one reason why so many girls swoon when Clay makes a post :D

[clay]

Aww, thank you, Leigh!!! Big hug, my friend!!!
PS Make me blush in here!!

[smouldering]

This is only one reason why so many girls swoon when Clay makes a post :D

Agreed, I love reading Claybaby's posts.. you can tell they are genuine and come from the heart :)

P.S. It is perfect weather for cuddling a big sexy butch :D

[clay]

Agreed, I love reading Claybaby's posts.. you can tell they are genuine and come from the heart :)

P.S. It is perfect weather for cuddling a big sexy butch :D

Aww, smouldering...here I am...blushing...again..you ladies are so sweet! Thanks so much! Yes, I do write right from my heart!!
And ANY DAY/TIME is perfect for cuddling with a gorgeous femme....

[Leigh]

Aww, thank you, Leigh!!! Big hug, my friend!!!
PS Make me blush in here!!

**hugs clay big time**

Agreed, I love reading Claybaby's posts.. you can tell they are genuine and come from the heart :)

P.S. It is perfect weather for cuddling a big sexy butch :D

Hy is one of the butches that I think is sweet, thoughtful, caring & handsome plus hy certainly has a way with hys words :)

Aww, smouldering...here I am...blushing...again..you ladies are so sweet! Thanks so much! Yes, I do write right from my heart!!
And ANY DAY/TIME is perfect for cuddling with a gorgeous femme....

You couldn't be more right, any day is perfect for cuddling a big butch :D

[Cuddles]

What an awesome thread!

I was sensitive to weight issues in my 20's and after failed relationships put on more weight figuring "what's the point"... but entering my 30's gave me a new perspective on myself and I stopped caring as much what others thought.

I've since lost 62 lbs and still going down. I've always been one of those cocky butches that looks in the mirror and likes what I see but worried would others. It's nice to be released from that... I got my swagger back.

I'm still a Big Butch and will be for awhile till I lose it finally but I'll be damned if I ever let myself get on the self-pity train again. So it warms my heart and soul to see this thread! You all are some amazing women/men! Proud to count myself among you all!

[Seeocean2011]

Just want to say Thanks for all the Nice/Sweet thoughts out there for us Butches.
I will be the one Opening the door for you, and Opening your car door for you.:-)

Thanks again

[msW8ing]

Yay the weekend is almost here. Anyone have anything fun planned for the weekend?

[cutie_pi]

Again, as many have said on here I just love big butches! Love. Love. Love. There's nothing like a big butch hug to make my day. Big arms holding me and making me feel safe. :gimmehug:

Just had to stop by and express my love!

[Leigh]

Big butches/FTM's will always rawk My world :-)

[Miss Scarlett]

Mmmmm...i so love my big, handsome Butch! His strength, amazing confidence, the smile that lights up his face, the look and deep growl that make me weak in the knees, that firm guiding hand, curling up with my head on his chest or shoulder, when i'm safely wrapped in those strong Butch arms all is well with the world...i'm the luckiest girl in the world!

[WomenMoveMe]

Not sure why, but every time I visit this thread, I am reminded of this song. Figured I might as well post it:

01KrL1ilnB4

[Countyfem]

Not sure why, but every time I visit this thread, I am reminded of this song. Figured I might as well post it:

01KrL1ilnB4

Love KD! and to all you wonderful big butches you rock just by being you

[clay]

Thank all you lovely femmes who love and appreciate a Big Butch!!! Makes ME "swoon"...umm do butches "swoon"...grin...maybe like go....thuddddddd....anyway either way, makes me feel special!!! Hugs to you all....love n kisses to all of you....Clay

[istolurboxers38]

To be honest It shouldnt be a matter of size except the size of your heart and the personality of the person on the inside. Being big and fluffy makes you just more to love and if you have the personality it makes it so much better. (f) to all the big and fluffy butches

[Miss Scarlett]

That you do Honey and it's that amazing heart of yours that got my attention...and you're wonderful to cuddle with too!!! i am one very lucky femme indeed!!!

i love my Sexy Silver Butch!!!


Aww, smouldering...here I am...blushing...again..you ladies are so sweet! Thanks so much! Yes, I do write right from my heart!!
And ANY DAY/TIME is perfect for cuddling with a gorgeous femme....

[Femmadian]

Reviving this thread because... well, big butches...

What I love about big butches in particular:
-their presence (amplified to the Nth power)
-thick fingers :sunglass:
-that soft, warm belly to cuddle up to
-they just feel solid
-wide hips and the sexy walk that comes with it
-more to grab onto ;-)
-that sweet spot to lay my head where their chest, shoulder, and big, butch arm meet
-play-wrestling in bed with them... winning is fun but then, so is losing...
-not having to worry if I'm going to break them!
-feeling the full weight of them on top of me... or draped across me after certain activities :cheer:
-the thickness of their thighs... it feels decadent to have them tangled up in/between mine
-wrapping my arms around them and pulling them closer (it feels great to have my arms totally full with a big, handsome butch and not be left wanting!)
-big, butch butt...

I like butches of all sizes, shapes, and stripes, but a big butch activates a certain primal, animal lust in me that I just can't deny. Thank Maude for big butches! :awww: :cheer: :heartbeat:

[starryeyes]

Big Butches=YUM!!! <3

[CherylNYC]

Ayup. I love big, strong butches.

[Mel C.]

It is refreshing to hear that there are femmes who appreciate us.

[SaltyButch]

I agree it's nice to know that there are women out there who appreciate us stocky fella's....I spent many years trying to lose weight so that someone might pay me attention, only to find out that some do like a little meat on the bones. All I can say is thank you for accepting me because it took me a long time to accept myself....and I finally do.

[Leigh]

As a BBW femme I know it seems like those of is with extra meat on our bones are invisible or something but it's not true - I love big butches, being able to snuggle upto them and the way they move in the world simply amazes me. Each and every one of you are appreciated, please never forget that :-)

[CherylNYC]

I recently had some VERY expensive work done on the suspension for my street bike. I matter-of-factly told the owner and technicians, "I'm 51 years old, and I know what I like. I like 'em BIG. My passengers will likely outweigh me by double.", I said. This was not a normal request, so I continued on to make sure I was fully understood. "I need a rear shock with a remote pre-load adjuster that will accommodate a passenger that's significantly larger than me. Because I like 'em big."

The regular straight dudes who work there likely hadn't heard a woman say anything like that before. They did a great job being professional, but I know they were having trouble figuring out how to react. My money is green, so they dutifully provided me with an Ohlins shock which they set up as requested. There's now a whole room full of mechanics who will see big, butch women just a little differently now.

I don't just accept big butches, I WANT one. It's OK if she doesn't want to ride on the back of my bike, but if she does she can consider it service.

[Femmadian]

Some other things to love:

-more force behind each movement, thrust, etc., just for their sheer size/weight
-being hugged from behind by one and feeling totally surrounded by butchness :-)
-"borrowing" a big butch's shirt around the house - so comfy!
-watching one fawn over something fluffy/furry. Butches making a fuss over animals in general is endearing, but there's something special about watching a particularly large butch reduced to a puddle in front of a furbaby
-the sight of a big butch on the back of a motorcycle :cheer:
-ever had a butch with a nice, round rump model a really cute pair of boxer briefs for you?
-bear hugs :heartbeat:
-big butch, big boots. 'Nuff said. :-)
-they look awesome nekkid (I mean, everyone does, but I think they look extra awesome)

Basically, there's a lot to love. I'm more aware of big butches in just plain physical terms because they simply occupy more physical real estate. I love to explore those hillsides (with permission, of course)...

My most recent ex (not on BFP) was about a size 20-ish (which I don't find all that large) and 6 ft 1. I can remember seeing her for the first time and thinking "my god, she's an Amazon." It's a miracle I was able to keep my hands off her as long as I did. Would I still have been attracted to her if she had been smaller or shorter? Sure, but that lethal combination of both length and girth is dynamite for this femme. :sunglass:

I think confidence is key if you can unlearn and unpack some of the negative messaging society imprints on you about larger bodies. I know it's hard and it's a constant battle but I have to say, seeing a larger butch with confidence is a huge turn on. It's important to remember (for anyone) that the more time you spend fidgeting with and putting down your own body, that's time you could be giving someone else to appreciate it in all its glory. :-)

From one big-butch-loving femme, please feel free to show off a bit more. :sunglass:

[Femmadian]

I don't just accept big butches, I WANT one.

THIS.
:yeahthat:

[Mel C.]

Hmmmm..seriously, I had NO idea

[MysticOceansFL]

Thanks to the femme's who prefer the bigger butches but what do you consider "bigger" just asking cause I'm not past 150 pounds, would I be considered as such?

[Leigh]

Hmmmm..seriously, I had NO idea

Well you definitely know now don't you? *grin*

[VintageFemme]

I'm a pretty small girl. Barely five foot and pretty petite so when those big strong stocky butch arms hold me close and hold me tight, well there just isn't a lot in this world that feels better. Big butch love, yes please.

[Wrang1er]

I am thankful for the women that love us. I am not tall, but I have the big part covered. :)

Thank you!

[clay]

I don't just accept big butches, I WANT one. It's OK if she doesn't want to ride on the back of my bike, but if she does she can consider it service.



Thank YOU, Cheryl!! You have always been a fave of mine....and you always say just the right things to us big butches!
Someone will be very blessed to deserve you!
You are AWESOME, my beautiful friend! and will ALWAYS be my fave crush

[-Red-Flag-]

I love this thread, I know first hand there are some Femmes out there that love them a big butch. For that I'm grateful.

Cheryl, can I ride on the back ;)

[Leigh]

There is nothing hotter than a big butch :)

[SaltyButch]

Who knew there was so much love out there for us....I am truly humbled...by the way...I make a good passenger~

[Mel C.]

I think there is gonna be a line for the butch bitch seat

[Leigh]

Sending lots of love to all the gorgeous big butches out there :)

[CherylNYC]

I think there is gonna be a line for the butch bitch seat

I promise it would be a really fun ride.

[starryeyes]

well shoot... I want to ride on a motorcycle behind a big butch! When will I ever get my chance!? lol

[Mel C.]

well shoot... I want to ride on a motorcycle behind a big butch! When will I ever get my chance!? lol

Lol...I can rent or borrow a bike. I like either position

[EmJay]

I don't know how I didn't see this thread before now. Nothing makes this girl blush more than a handsome cuddly butch. *smiles*

[Daktari]

I think there is gonna be a line for the butch bitch seat

Really? Bitch seat? Really? :|

[Kobi]

Really? Bitch seat? Really? :|


Thanks for pointing this out Daktari.

Good example of how something becomes so much a part of life and language that we dont see it for what it is......disrespectful towards and derogatory to women.

Funny dat.

[Morice Diesel]

thank you to all the beautiful femmes who appreciate and love us big ol cuddly butch

[*Anya*]

I am, ahem, less petite than I was when my girlfriend and I got together (she is a great cook).

I love to lay on top of her and have her wrap her arms around me- whether we are in a non-sexual or a sexual place.

It kind of helps to shut the world out for me and I feel safe and loved.

I probably would not do that if she did not have the kind of body that envelopes (and outweighs) me.

*sigh*

I love her.

[Daktari]

Just a reminder, you can report or respond, not both. Use your words to talk about why you think it's problematic, not just exclamations of disbelief.

Thanks everyone! Keep it positive!

Yeah, sorry, it was me 'wot did it' (sic)

I find the phrase 'bitch seat' really problematic in that, for me, it presents as linguistic misogyny.

Referring to any female or female bodied person as a bitch and something they use as a bitch something-or-other is, as Kobi points out, disrespectful.

:chaplin:

[Wrang1er]

I don't know how I didn't see this thread before now. Nothing makes this girl blush more than a handsome cuddly butch. *smiles*

Is there a sign up list for cuddling?

[Leigh]

why don't we create a cuddle list for the thread? I'll start it off:

~> 1) Leigh


Who else wants to sign up? :-)

[EmJay]

Is there a sign up list for cuddling?

Awe 41 *smiles* no list for you.. Always an open invitation :) xoxoxo

[sharonsuburbia]

why don't we create a cuddle list for the thread? I'll start it off:

~> 1) Leigh


Who else wants to sign up? :-)

i'm in :rrose:

[CornCountryFemme]

I love big butches :) The comfort being snuggled up in their arms and being all nice, warm and protected. Yep. I'll take that type of two arms any day!

[~SweetCheeks~]

I absolutely adore Big Butches. There's something about being wrapped up in strong arms and laying on their chest that just makes me swoon. I've Been head over heels in love with my big butch for almost 4 years now and wouldn't want it any other way. :-) ♥♥

[CornCountryFemme]

I wanna join this cuddle list... hehehe

[Talon]

The size of your body is of little account,
the size of your brain is of much account,
the size of your heart is of the most account of all.

~B.C. Forbes

[Mel C.]

Is there more loving on the way?

[JustLovelyJenn]

*grins* i hadn't seen this before!!!!

[Mel C.]

*grins* i hadn't seen this before!!!!

And??? What do you have to say to the big butches?

[Bèsame*]

you rock my world!And??? What do you have to say to the big butches?

[JustLovelyJenn]

And??? What do you have to say to the big butches?

C'mere... I got a lot of big love to give to someone special.

[Femmadian]

Yes, I love big butches and I cannot lie...

As summer begins to wind down, my eyes drift (surreptitiously) to all the butch flesh which has been on display of late (and all that hasn't)... so naturally, a girl's mind does wander to butches in general, especially the big ones.

In case there are any remaining doubts for potential Big Butch Love converts (it is a bit like a religious experience...*), here are some things worth considering:


First off, I know it's been mentioned before but it bears repeating: cuddles, cuddles, cuddles. Also, cuddles.
Watching a big butch dismount a bike and showing off that beautiful, thick thigh (and/or backside, depending on your viewing angle). :blink:
A large, fleshy body is so satisfying to make contact with, especially if you like things a little rougher behind closed doors: biting, scratching, clawing, grabbing, spanking... It's been my experience that a butch with a big body can take all of that and more (or give - if you or they are so inclined)... :heartbeat:
Have you ever rested your head on the soft, oh-so-supple inner flesh of a big butch thigh?
Being surrounded by those big butch thighs (and other things) and suddenly having the walls close in on you. :groucho:
The way their clothing fits their frame. When wearing typically masculine/men's clothing, they cut a very different figure in the same outfit... and that figure is sexy.
Full cheeks (top and bottom)!
That sexy "thud" sound they make when you push them up against the wall... The bigger the butch, the bigger the "thud". :D
Straddling (or at least attempting to straddle) a big butch's thighs.
The way their body moves and shifts when lifting their shirt up and off; also, the image they create when on their backs with their wrists restrained above their head (hey, not all femmes are submissive, ya know...). :eyebat:
The distinctive curve of their hips contrasted with whatever they're wearing over them.
Rolling over in the middle of the night and seeing the silhouette of that expansive, beautiful back as she snoozes. :awww:
Big butch laps!
Wrapping your legs around their waist... and maybe not quite being able to lock your ankles because of all the butch between your thighs. :clap:
Showing off their assets while squatting/bending down to pick something up ("oh, did I drop my lipstick? Can you get that for me? Thanks. Ohhh, I dropped it again. Slippery little sucker..."). :4femme:
Being woken up by a big, heavy, randy butch lying on top of you, eyes dancing... (especially if you've suddenly been rolled onto your stomach...). :cheer:
Lounging around at home, seeing fleshy butch toes peeking out from under long, loose jeans - so cute!
The contrast of a femme's vs a big butch's hands and feeling those fingers intertwined.
Being spooned by a big butch. :cheer:
Spooning a big butch. :heartbeat:
Did I mention cuddles? http://www.forestforum.co.uk/images/smilies/cuddle.gif


:heartbeat: :awww: :heartbeat:


* - If we do decide to make a religion out of this, I'm casting my vote for CherylNYC as pope considering she's already got a pretty badass popemobile ready to go. :harley:

[CherylNYC]

Yes, I love big butches and I cannot lie...

As summer begins to wind down, my eyes drift (surreptitiously) to all the butch flesh which has been on display of late (and all that hasn't)... so naturally, a girl's mind does wander to butches in general, especially the big ones.

In case there are any remaining doubts for potential Big Butch Love converts (it is a bit like a religious experience...*), here are some things worth considering:


First off, I know it's been mentioned before but it bears repeating: cuddles, cuddles, cuddles. Also, cuddles.
Watching a big butch dismount a bike and showing off that beautiful, thick thigh (and/or backside, depending on your viewing angle). :blink:
A large, fleshy body is so satisfying to make contact with, especially if you like things a little rougher behind closed doors: biting, scratching, clawing, grabbing, spanking... It's been my experience that a butch with a big body can take all of that and more (or give - if you or they are so inclined)... :heartbeat:
Have you ever rested your head on the soft, oh-so-supple inner flesh of a big butch thigh?
Being surrounded by those big butch thighs (and other things) and suddenly having the walls close in on you. :groucho:
The way their clothing fits their frame. When wearing typically masculine/men's clothing, they cut a very different figure in the same outfit... and that figure is sexy.
Full cheeks (top and bottom)!
That sexy "thud" sound they make when you push them up against the wall... The bigger the butch, the bigger the "thud". :D
Straddling (or at least attempting to straddle) a big butch's thighs.
The way their body moves and shifts when lifting their shirt up and off; also, the image they create when on their backs with their wrists restrained above their head (hey, not all femmes are submissive, ya know...). :eyebat:
The distinctive curve of their hips contrasted with whatever they're wearing over them.
Rolling over in the middle of the night and seeing the silhouette of that expansive, beautiful back as she snoozes. :awww:
Big butch laps!
Wrapping your legs around their waist... and maybe not quite being able to lock your ankles because of all the butch between your thighs. :clap:
Showing off their assets while squatting/bending down to pick something up ("oh, did I drop my lipstick? Can you get that for me? Thanks. Ohhh, I dropped it again. Slippery little sucker..."). :4femme:
Being woken up by a big, heavy, randy butch lying on top of you, eyes dancing... (especially if you've suddenly been rolled onto your stomach...). :cheer:
Lounging around at home, seeing fleshy butch toes peeking out from under long, loose jeans - so cute!
The contrast of a femme's vs a big butch's hands and feeling those fingers intertwined.
Being spooned by a big butch. :cheer:
Spooning a big butch. :heartbeat:
Did I mention cuddles? http://www.forestforum.co.uk/images/smilies/cuddle.gif


:heartbeat: :awww: :heartbeat:


* - If we do decide to make a religion out of this, I'm casting my vote for CherylNYC as pope considering she's already got a pretty badass popemobile ready to go. :harley:


I'm deeply flattered, but if we're going to start a Big Butch Love religion I vote for the kind with no Pope. Can we start one with a rotating cadre of femme griots who sing the praises of big butches? I haven't seen a praise song this beautiful and elegant, (not to mention HOT), in ages!

[Happy_Go_Lucky]

Femmadian. Think you would fit perfectly in either one of these laps? :bunchflowers:

http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/236x/fa/7a/ab/fa7aab1ab7fcaed8b7e248e98640f645.jpg

[Femmadian]

Femmadian. Think you would fit perfectly in either one of these laps? :bunchflowers:

http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/236x/fa/7a/ab/fa7aab1ab7fcaed8b7e248e98640f645.jpg

Ummm, maybe? :eyebrow: I'd have to test that theory before giving a definitive answer either way.

I'm deeply flattered, but if we're going to start a Big Butch Love religion I vote for the kind with no Pope. Can we start one with a rotating cadre of femme griots who sing the praises of big butches? I haven't seen a praise song this beautiful and elegant, (not to mention HOT), in ages!

Awww, thank you! :blush: I'm just happy I'm not the only one who feels this way. :candle:

So, if we're not going to have a Pope (very democratic), then can we at least have some kind of symbol to sport so we can identify ourselves, like our very own Star of David or cross necklace? Maybe something like the mudflap girl but with different proportions and spiky hair? Or what about an exaggerated version of the fertility goddess symbol but sporting a fauxhawk and "leather" cuffs?
http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/36/fa/05/36fa054080e9052f33fc1f12854b06ba.jpg
(maybe we could make the belly swirl a rainbow?)
It could work!

...Something to say to the big, beautiful butch on the street that I'd like to "eat of her body" and kneel at her altar (without, you know, a sexual harassment charge... :police:)?

THAT is one form of "femme flagging" I'd be happy to partake in! :groucho: :cheesy:

[Femmadian]

There's something I'd like to touch on here for a bit, if I may, which I've noticed has come up here and elsewhere in threads about larger bodies, both butch and femme. There are always questions about who belongs, who it's for, what "qualifies" one to be considered "big," "large," "BBW," whatever word you choose... and also what the purpose of this thread is beyond some "rah, rah, rah, you do you" body positivity cheerleading which I know, while feeling nice at the time, can ring a little hollow in the face of all of the body shaming it's stacked up against.

Here's the thing: If you feel this applies to you, then it does. This thread is for people who fall outside the norm or have been made to feel that way because their size by someone's definition (either their own or someone else's) falls outside the acceptable parameters of what a good butch is, what's sexy, what's attractive, what could be considered desirable by both members of their culture or subculture and by current or prospective love interests. This thread here is for big butches, specifically, and the unique ways in which their bodies exist and are understood.

Butches in particular get so much shit from both inside and outside the community in ways I'm sure I don't have to detail for those here. To have their size and the bodies they inhabit mocked or put down on top of that, perhaps it even being said their bodies invalidate their expression of butch or their validity as a butch person, it just seems particularly ugly when, in fact, they are truly beautiful. Looking through the posts here will tell you that. To see such positive, affirming, and loving words by some of the members here is heartening and it makes me feel good for us as a community.

I've also seen some people posting here and in other threads bring up questions about if they're considered "big" or if this body type or that body type is considered large by other posters or if this or other threads are for them. Here is what I think.

It's for the bodies whose photos are hard to find. It's for the bodies whose photos never happen. It's for the bodies whose photos only happen from the shoulders up. It's for the bodies who will sweat and wilt and suffer in blistering heat and freeze in bone chilling cold because their owners have been taught that other people's callous conceptions about those bodies and what they should look like and how much space they are "allowed" to take up are more important than their own safety and comfort. It's for bodies whose owners think others shouldn't be "forced" to look at them and so they cover them up and try to hide. It's for the bodies which are derisively thought of when some hateful asshole labels someone a "fat dyke" or equates "butch" with "ugly." It's for the butches who may never be approached by mainstream LGBTQ organizations to appear in a calendar, a magazine, news article, or online feature for fear of conforming to old stereotypes while that organization engages in the queer version of "respectability politics." It's for the bodies which not only have a hard time finding clothing which they feel themselves in because of their gender expression but also because of their size and who may never feel fully comfortable, even in their own skin. It's for the bodies and their owners who do not feel that they fit in or represent a good specimen of what a "butch" is or should look like. It's for the bodies which, shouldering the burden of representing the entire community as a whole while in isolation from the rest, feel they're letting the community down and only reinforcing stereotypes by virtue of their existence. It's for the bodies whose owners who, while perhaps intellectually understanding that there is nothing wrong with them, most days cannot bring themselves to look into a full length mirror. It's for the bodies which can sometimes be a physical manifestation of someone's efforts to kill their pain... or to avert it. It's for the bodies which have been concern-trolled (http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/compost/wp/2014/01/13/enter-the-concern-troll/) by loved ones and lovers instead of embraced and kissed and celebrated for who and what they are. It's for the bodies whose owners are only allowed to "live" fully after reaching an externally or internally imposed goal.

It's for the bodies whose owners feel they must first shrink themselves in order to feel worthy of love.

...
You are not ugly. You do not "look good for your size." Your attractiveness does not have a qualifier. You are attractive and you are wanted because of what you are and not in spite of it, full stop. Your body makes so many chests swell and hearts go pitter-pat. Your body makes knees weak and cheeks blush. It makes people fall in love with you and compete for you and make love to you and want to be with you... and you are no one's consolation prize.

Personally, I don't like you because I think that all bodies are beautiful. I like you and I want you because you are beautiful.
...

I've read every post in this thread, some more than once (and some much more than once) and I loved reading all the different ways and conceptions of honouring large butch bodies and seeing big butches through someone else's eyes. I've loved and smiled at the butches responding with incredulity, bashfulness, happiness, and yes, desire. It has made me cry more than once to see adult people, some in their 40s, 50s, and beyond, expressing disbelief at the idea that someone could want them for them and who and what they are and not as something to be settled for or willfully overlooked. It also makes me laugh and grin to see them coming around to the idea and egging the others on to stroke their big butch tail feathers just a little more. I think this is one of my favourite threads because it is so human.

I mentioned the symbol for lovers of big butches as yes, partly comedic relief but also half in seriousness. I think the desire for big butches, it's worth codifying and being "A Thing" with a capital "T." It needs to be something understood and accepted and not seen as a fringe-y element of a fringe-y group within an already seemingly oddball, rainbow-coloured fringe. I think there's power in appropriating a symbol not originally made for you (and even perhaps made to exclude you) while at the same time rejecting it and stating unequivocally your active desire for something else without apology or explanation. It's a radical thing for women to do and, especially when it comes to woman-identified butches, how much more so is it for women when it comes to desiring other women? Big butches are not exactly considered the norm in any respect, even within our community, and for me, my desire for them is "queer" in the truest sense of the word. My desires are queering in their effect, both on my own life and those who see me live it, as by their very nature they are not heteronormative nor most people's idea of what a "respectable" queer will do and they are an active rejection of that mould. A big butch body is not leftovers or what I can "get" or will settle for. It's what I actively want, outside the norm, outside of influence, outside of external factors, outside of everything, and inside of me.

When I write in this thread, I try to give specifics which I think might resonate with both those who may consider themselves big butches and those who love them because of my own experiences in various points and places in time of being made to feel "less than," unattractive, bigger than "normal," or tolerated but not desired. It's one thing to give generic platitudes of "all bodies are beautiful" and "big is beautiful" and "real X's have Y's" (which just substitutes one body's denigration for another...), but to hear and see signifiers that I understand as my lived experience treated with care, affection, and desirability, that, to me, makes a difference, and I hope that in some small way this thread does the same for those who need it.

Some individuals have messaged me privately expressing appreciation for what I and others have written and I get it. It's not always enough to just wave your hand and say someone's beautiful and then hope that that takes care of everything... not when they've been told over and over again for years and sometimes even a lifetime that they're not. These feelings didn't develop in a vacuum. You need to let them know why you think they're beautiful. You need to let them know what you desire about them. You need to let them know how they make you feel and you need to let them know who you are so that they can recognize that people like you genuinely exist. You can't just say someone's beautiful and leave it at that.

You need to give them a reason to believe you.

I would also like to touch on the use of "beautiful" as a descriptor of butches. I know that some may chafe under or cringe at that word, see it as feminizing, emasculating, or even a bit "fluffy." Here's why I use it. How I look at it is if something as ephemeral and ungendered as a sunset, a summer's day, a piece of music, or even a piece of machinery can be described as beautiful, so can a human being, regardless of gender or presentation. Men can be beautiful. Women can be beautiful. Anyone who doesn't ascribe to traditional conceptions of masculinity or femininity or embodies both together, can be described as beautiful. I think it's an important term to use here because it feels important to talk about these bodies with a reverence and frank desire, the same reverence and desire which I have known and felt for them, to express it openly and without qualifiers or apologies, and to restore to a public forum the concept of their desirability in whatever way possible... and also to use a word which is familiar to us as denoting positivity, praise, and unquestioned, untrammelled, uncontroversial desirability. There is nothing aberrant or unnatural about wanting and desiring a big butch with a big body. It feels natural to me to describe someone I love and desire as beautiful because that is the word I am used to having employed by the culture at large for the things I hold dear and precious and I don't want to separate my love for big butches as something different or strange which somehow does not (or should not) fall under that umbrella. I want them under that umbrella and I want to keep them safe from the torrent of acidic judgments, comments, and ugliness which have been known to rain down on them. You're bloody right I think they're beautiful. They are.

All of this is to say that if you've read everything written here (and bless you if you have) and you think that most, if not all of what has been described applies to you, then yes, it does, and this thread is for you. I think this thread functions best when it's descriptive and not prescriptive. This space doesn't need to serve as a place for excluding some bodies over others, or saying that one body is better than another, or even setting up some sort of objective, external standard of what it means to be a big butch or to belong in this space. That's not how I understand it. From what I've seen thus far, this thread is for big butches and the people who love them. I am hopeful that in time there will be more posts from the butches themselves describing the ways others have expressed appreciation and love for them and their bodies and other positive observations they may have about what it means for them to be a big butch... but in the meantime I'm happy to be a small part of a thread which, however superficially, can help big butches feel loved and desired because I think that, in the end, ultimately that is what this thread is for. It serves a very specific purpose for a very specific group and that's okay. And there's something very beautiful about that.

It may be only one small spot of one small website in one small corner of the universe, but, much like the butches it describes, it's very much needed and appreciated and loved... and I'm so glad that both it and they exist. :)

TL;DR (http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/TL;DR): Big butches are beautiful. :rose: