Tips on Avoiding Shady Lesbian Bars

[WheatToast]

You know the story--you're out of town on a little vacay and you and your lovely traveling companion want to visit a local lesbian bar.
So you Google and get a few hits. You visit the first one, and here are things to look for that might be considered red flags. Please add to the list.

1. The parking lot has oil stains on parking spaces the size of Rhode Island.
2. A sign on the front door says, "Please leave your weapons and drugs in your vehicle."

Your thoughts?

[Martina]

I didn't know there were any lesbian bars left.

[BullDog]

I had the same thought as Martina. All of the lesbian bars I have known about in the past have closed down. I never spent a lot of time in bars but it's sad.

[C0LLETTE]

There are lots of "lesbian" bars. Just go to your local American or Canadian Legion Hall. ... and the beer's cheaper too.

[JDeere]

Our lesbian bar here only posts legal signs of no weapons, etc.

The other glbtqi bars do the same.

I haven't really come across anything shady.

[~ocean]

the lesbian bars that were here happened to have been very nice places ~ a few were mixed w/ our brothers :) I always find anything ran or owned by woman ( no sexual identity needed ) were fun , clean , well managed establishments.

[kittygrrl]

I've never been to a shady lesbian bar..they've always been a fun, mixed crowd-if I was out of the mix for awhile I've always asked my friends what gay bar had the best music and went there.

[WheatToast]

There are lots of "lesbian" bars. Just go to your local American or Canadian Legion Hall. ... and the beer's cheaper too.

That was hilarious! I hear bowling alleys and "straight" softball games also have their share of "confirmed bachelorettes."

[WheatToast]

Our lesbian bar here only posts legal signs of no weapons, etc.

The other glbtqi bars do the same.

I haven't really come across anything shady.

I was trying to be funny, but sometimes I miss the mark. :jester:

[WheatToast]

Yep. I definitely missed the mark. Sorry.:blush:

[JDeere]

I was trying to be funny, but sometimes I miss the mark. :jester:

I understood what you meant,WT,just sometimes I don't run into shady stuff ya know!

[MaddieRobbie]

I wish the bars were shadier than they are!

The dive bar - any dive bar - is becoming an endangered species and sometimes when I'm out...I really want to feel like I'm up to no good. Or at least think I have misbehavior as an option.

[Reach *BANNED*]

I've never been to a shady lesbian bar..they've always been a fun, mixed crowd-if I was out of the mix for awhile I've always asked my friends what gay bar had the best music and went there.


Ditto to this. Especially the dance clubs- always had a great time. Not a thing shady about any of them.

[Reach *BANNED*]

I wish the bars were shadier than they are!

The dive bar - any dive bar - is becoming an endangered species and sometimes when I'm out...I really want to feel like I'm up to no good. Or at least think I have misbehavior as an option.


Oh, and ditto to this. We still have a couple here and I prefer them over a bar with overpriced drinks and a snooty crowd.

Shade is good. ;)

[Wrang1er]

Oh, and ditto to this. We still have a couple here and I prefer them over a bar with overpriced drinks and a snooty crowd.

Shade is good. ;)

Agreed. Shady isn't a bad thing!

[C0LLETTE]

I wish the bars were shadier than they are!

The dive bar - any dive bar - is becoming an endangered species and sometimes when I'm out...I really want to feel like I'm up to no good. Or at least think I have misbehavior as an option.

Absolutely and Bravo. I much prefer cheap beer joints full of the lusty, the sexy, and even the semi-comatose whose sunglasses are still on the bar at midnight.

Try running credit at one of those " $12-per-badly-mixed-cocktail" bars and you'll be tossed even before the bill for your Oakley sunglasses has arrived."

[TL1]

I haven’t been to a shady lesbian bar. I have been to shady straight bars when I was young with straight friends. But that’s about it.

Mostly I’ve been to mixed crowd gay dance clubs. There’s one here that won’t let you in unless they think you look good enough to be there. I had no clue they did that until about my fifth time going and someone was sitting outside on the curb because they wouldn’t let them in. Anyway off subject sorry.

I am finding this thread an amusing read though. :)

[~ocean]

I wish their were lesbian bars around ~ where else would ya want to wear your booty jeans too !

[Bèsame*]

Well in my parts of the country we have country western bars. I ventured out last weekend, only to find free country dance lessons. (They were straight couples) Ok, I asked the purple haired bartender, when does this end??

I could wait 30 min., maybe the girls will show up. Settled in with a good drink, and played pool with my dapper butch friend.

An hour passes...these straight people do not leave! So much for my eye candy arriving. She on the other hand, was getting huge smiles from those women!

I'll try another night..lol

[Jedi]

The lesbian bars here all closed, too. What I wouldn't give for a little hole in the wall dive bar.

[Chad]

I love a little shady in my life.

Back in the day during the 70s in Houston we had dive bars. Back then I was a bit of a naughty boy and I might still be. Haha! I have great memories from those days. I miss having neighborhood dive bars.

[Martina]

That was hilarious! I hear bowling alleys and "straight" softball games also have their share of "confirmed bachelorettes."

I don't think there are many lesbians masquerading as "confirmed bachelorettes" anymore. Maybe a generation or two ago. The old dykes I see in dive bars around here (ruralish) tend to be with their partners.

[cathexis]

Dark, shady, dyke bars where most were dancing "the grind." Anyone
remember the grind??? lol
If not doing the grind, you could always join in the boot scoot boogie or
Cotton Eye Joe

If the bar was in a shady neighborhood, there was usually a large Amazon
or two that would walk to your car with you. Back then (early '70s), large dykes proudly wore the label of "bull dyke", but only within the community.

Anyone remember the (sometimes) rough lesbian bars in Chicago, CK's
(when on Diversey) or Augie's on Broadway? There were several on Rampart St. in New Orleans. Don't forget the ones in Miami-Ft. Lauderdale or even Indianapolis. Let's hear about some in NYC and the West Coast and elsewhere.

[WheatToast]

Absolutely and Bravo. I much prefer cheap beer joints full of the lusty, the sexy, and even the semi-comatose whose sunglasses are still on the bar at midnight.

Try running credit at one of those " $12-per-badly-mixed-cocktail" bars and you'll be tossed even before the bill for your Oakley sunglasses has arrived."

Okay, I have a shady bar story for you...
Years ago, I was in Tokyo with a friend and neither of us spoke or read Japanese, or knew anyone there, but she just had to go to the only lesbian bar in a city of 14 million.
Our hotel was in the financial district, but the gay area was three subways away in an area called Shinjuku 2 chome. The womens' bar we sought was called Mars Bar.
For starters, 2 chome was pronounced, "KNEE-Cho-may, so we asked a bunch of gay men where it was and they looked at us like we were asking for nude piggyback rides.
Shinjuku is only about 4 square blocks, and the only two lesbians we saw were so butch, they looked like they rolled their own tampons (insert laughter here. No yelling at me!).
I was getting a little annoyed after an hour of circling the same four blocks, so I said unless this dive is up the side of a building, it's not here. So my literal friend Poindexter starts looking up. There, a few blocks away and four floors straight up was an unlit sign that measured 9" wide by 3" deep. it said, "mars." The four floor walk-up interior was literally 10 feet wide by 6 feet deep, and it was packed. The two tampon butches were there (yay) then one bartender, a bar that was 12" wide and two bar stools, where we sat. Five people, and a $10 cover charge. No music and no TV. It was a Wednesday. I said to my friend,"Ten dollars? WTF is the cover on weekends, $100?"
A shot of locally made Suntori Scotch was $20 and a beer was $8.
Beer snacks consisted of a tiny bowl of radish threads.

By then I was side-eyeing my friend, asking if she was into either tampon butch, cuz I'd be glad to introduce her. She passed. The bartender decided to amuse us, so first she showed us her photo albums of her trip to the Grand Canyon. Then, five thousand pics later, she reached under the counter and pulled out a magazine. It was filled with photos of Japanese lesbians peeing all over each other. Every single pic was, pee- pee- pee and more pee.
The two butches and the bartender were highly amused by our horrified reactions. So, for only $76 plus tips, we got drinks, snacks, a floor show, eight flights of stairs and six subway changes. Plus all that piss porn!

[homoe]

Dark, shady, dyke bars where most were dancing "the grind." Anyone
remember the grind??? lol
If not doing the grind, you could always join in the boot scoot boogie or
Cotton Eye Joe

If the bar was in a shady neighborhood, there was usually a large Amazon
or two that would walk to your car with you. Back then (early '70s), large dykes proudly wore the label of "bull dyke", but only within the community.

Anyone remember the (sometimes) rough lesbian bars in Chicago, CK's
(when on Diversey) or Augie's on Broadway? There were several on Rampart St. in New Orleans. Don't forget the ones in Miami-Ft. Lauderdale or even Indianapolis. Let's hear about some in NYC and the West Coast and elsewhere.

IF the bar was in a shady neighborhood?? Most back in the day always were with windows either blacked out or boarded up..:blink:

I remember CK's & Augies but my favorite was Paris Dance but it wasn't a shady one!

[ProfPacker]

The Duchess, Bonnie & Clyde, Paula's, Cookie's on 14th Street, Peaches, upper East Side (not really too shady). The one's that were also good but not shady were: The Lib (by UN, burned down, great club), Sahara (the ultimate of all lesbian bars that felt that we had dignity.

In Detroit: Cafe Gigi; The Escape, after-hours: the Blind Pig, Gaygen's (mixed)
Ann Arbor: mixed bar: The Flame
later for women: The Rubyait.

There were others that were hangouts like Phoebe's on lower Eastside, Ninth Circle on Greenwich. Can you tell that I had fun.

[Kätzchen]

The Duchess, Bonnie & Clyde, Paula's, Cookie's on 14th Street, Peaches, upper East Side (not really too shady). The one's that were also good but not shady were: The Lib (by UN, burned down, great club), Sahara (the ultimate of all lesbian bars that felt that we had dignity.

In Detroit: Cafe Gigi; The Escape, after-hours: the Blind Pig, Gaygen's (mixed)
Ann Arbor: mixed bar: The Flame
later for women: The Rubyait.

There were others that were hangouts like Phoebe's on lower Eastside, Ninth Circle on Greenwich. Can you tell that I had fun.

Prof? Do you mean Kooky's???? If so, I found an interesting blog article online about several bars from years ago... including Kooky's:

Kooky’s Cocktail Lounge (W. 14th Street, New York, NY) 1960s to early 1970s.

One of only two lesbian bars in the city at that time, it seems like everybody who went to Kooky’s mostly hated it.

Karla Jay, in her book The Lavender Menace: A Memoir of Liberation, tells tales of a hostile owner dressed in complicated pastel prom gowns who would harass clientele into buying more drinks (eventually turning everybody into an alcoholic), a bathroom guard who parceled out three squares of toilet paper to each guest while ensuring no couples snuck in and an intimidating entrance/carding procedure administered by male doormen. (The toilet paper situation wasn’t unique to this bar, however, this was a common strategy.) “The bar lesbians were in no position to rebel against Kooky’s dictatorship,” Jay writes. “Instead, they put their energy into creating a network of friends and allies within the bar.”



For the flash back to Kooky's the Stonewall era bar in NYC, you can find an great article here:

Lost Womyn's Space - Kooky's Cocktail Lounge (7th of September, 2011) (http://lostwomynsspace.blogspot.com/2011/09/kookys-cocktail-lounge.html)



For another interesting personal account about the Lesbian bar Kooky's, of yesteryear, you can find the story here:

AutoStraddle: 15 Awesomely Named Yet Totally Defunct Lesbian Bars of America (22nd of June, 2012). (https://www.autostraddle.com/15-awesomely-named-yet-totally-defunct-lesbian-bars-of-america-140214/)

[homoe]

I cannot believe Maud's didn't make the list!


It was a very famous bar in San Francisco and after it closed they even made a documentary about it!

In the early 80's me and Mary went there while on vacation in San Francisco. It was very obvious we were tourists and lesbians.

The bartender wasn't overly welcoming nor were any of the patrons. We were very disappointed!

[homoe]

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[homoe]

I remember spending many Saturday Nights dancing at this established!

When folks just wanted to shoot pool and converse tho they headed over to the Sugar Shack!

[WheatToast]

The Duchess, Bonnie & Clyde, Paula's, Cookie's on 14th Street, Peaches, upper East Side (not really too shady). The one's that were also good but not shady were: The Lib (by UN, burned down, great club), Sahara (the ultimate of all lesbian bars that felt that we had dignity.

In Detroit: Cafe Gigi; The Escape, after-hours: the Blind Pig, Gaygen's (mixed)
Ann Arbor: mixed bar: The Flame
later for women: The Rubyait.

There were others that were hangouts like Phoebe's on lower Eastside, Ninth Circle on Greenwich. Can you tell that I had fun.

Loved the Duchess in NYC. In L.A. Peanuts, Que Sera Sera, The Abbey.

[CherylNYC]

Loved the Duchess in NYC. In L.A. Peanuts, Que Sera Sera, The Abbey.

The Duchess was fun. Once a gay-boy friend embarrassed me deeply when he tried to get me to hook up with the bartender.

[girl_dee]

The famous The Grog in New Orleans was owned by a dear friend who died in Katrina, when she was just an amazing lady who wanted lesbians to have a place to go. Here is a little bit about her and her lesbian bar legacy:



PINO Rosemary Pino ""Mama'' tragically departed this world to meet her Heavenly Father on Monday, August 29, 2005 during Hurricane Katrina. Throughout her life, Mama was a pioneer for rights of the gay and lesbian community. In addition, she worked diligently for human rights and AIDS. With her beloved business partner and devoted friend of 56 years, Margie Normand, they owned and operated numerous gay bars including, The Grog, De Ja Vu', Pino's, The Blue Odyssey, and Club 621.. Mama was heavily involved with the gay carnival organizations. A member of A.G.G.I., honorary mom for the Krewe of Polythemus and the Krewe of Armenius, she also served as a board member for the Krewe of Ishtar (an all women's gay club). Standing only five feet high, Mama's distinctive laugh and bubbly personality made her appear to be six feet tall. She volunteered for The Lighthouse for the Blind and taught blind children to swim. She loved to swim and played softball until she was forty years old. Mama fought for the underdog and often adopted gay kids whose parents had disowned them.


There is much more but this will suffice. She will always be my shero. When people talk about the old lesbian bars in New Orleans, you always think of Mama Pino.

[tantalizingfemme]

The one I remember most was the first one I ever went to. It was in Phoenix, AZ, and the full name was Ain't Nobody's Bizness, but everyone called it The Biz. It was great. I think it closed quite a while ago. Lot's of memories there.

[not2shygrrl]

My shady bar encounter(s) comes from when I was younger...late twenties/early thirties. It was more than one encounter also! More likely a few years or so! The Norreh in Pittsburgh was the after hours place to be ( also there was Travelers but that's a separate entry into this thread!) especially after hours. Many weekends when I left it was to the sky beginning to light up in the early am and a group of us was headed to the diner. They had 3 floors, pool tables, a small kitchen for basic orders, a top floor that was for dancing on the lighted dance floor with a fucking fantastic DJ Billy! The basement was known as the dungeon, and females of any sort didn't go down there for the most part. It was for the gay men, and it was known as a kinky dungeon with regular scheduled crisco nights that I never even asked what that was about but figured it out with not much thought. >shivers< One of the pool tables was down there and by choice I never played pool on it... If you arrived early enough (before 11 pm) you might make it down there into the "store" that was the size of a closet, and things like hand cuffs, whips, tongue dams, edible undies and creams, lotions and potions were available to purchase, as well as poppers and undoubtedly illegal substances if you were known well enough.

It was owned by two gay men and run by two lesbians who had become like Moms to me. Sharon and Bev, who lived for the week days so they could escape up to their camp near Lake Erie. It was the kind of bar that I got my windshield broken when parked in the lot, over a lesbian I was dating. I guess someone else wanted her pretty badly. Damn shady for sure.... but I always had a blast. I remember a good friend of mine tracked me down to stay clear of a lesbian who was there looking for me and she was in a pajama top that had a fuzzy teddy bear on it, went right up to my friend and embarrassed the hell outta her! That woman was hard to shake off, and it took a butch friend of mine hopping over the bar towards her to keep her away from me. * thank you Lisa Lisa* It was one of my first encounters with a bull dyke that happened here, and it was indirectly thru a friend girl of mine that was leaving with said bull dyke and we walked outside to leave and the dyke said to her " get on my bike bitch". I looked at my friend and raised my eyebrow as if saying do you really wanna do this?? She handed me her purse and said catch me tomorrow....off they went!! I met some hella drag queens ( Formica Dinet, Aneda Bagel) at this bar over the years, and some sadly died due to aids. It was just then that aids became somewhat of an epidemic and public at the same time. I guess I can say shady bars are not to bad if you have the right people around you. I think that if I was to run into anyone from those days, it would be like these past thirty years have not passed at all and I am just as fond of that crew now as I was then. Shady bars sure do have some good qualities about them!

Any slang I used in this post is said with affection, and really at the time is what terms were used for labels. No intention of insulting anyone.