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Ursy 07-29-2010 06:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by apocalipstic (Post 162503)
The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

I got that - well, I got branded "lazy". "Apply herself" was something that I heard a lot, as well as "daydreaming" - oh yes, and the "stop drawing during class" - I once got into big trouble for drawing on an exam once I'd answered all the questions that I could. But nobody had heard of Asperger's back then. I wonder if it would have been easier if they had? I guess so...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Liam (Post 162655)
I just watched Adam, a movie about a fellow aspergian. Has anyone else seen it? What did you think of it?

I saw it - awhile ago. I think I enjoyed it, could see myself in some of it (not all). I think some of it was a bit over-simplified but that could have been for the benefit of the masses who might not know a lot about people on the autistic spectrum... but overall, I think it was a pretty good movie. My favourite is Snow Cake, even though the character Sigourney Weaver played was more autistic than asperger's. I think her daughter was probably aspie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by violaine (Post 162763)

did you ever try to explain to the teachers that you were listening, thinking, feeling, following, understanding . . . only to be met with something ELSE [negatively stated] about your tone of voice ? ? ? being called 'argumentative' in responding to how they so wrongly perceived you?

I wish I could have tried, though it sounds like it would not have helped anyway - I would have been misinterpreted just like you described, Belle. I usually would just cry and be completely unable to advocate for myself or explain anything at all.

It's very frustrating to be so emotionally fragile!

suebee 07-29-2010 06:58 AM

"Does not pay attention. Easily distracted." But with me it was undiagnosed ADD. To this day I have to explain myself. I once told a friend who was a physician that I had ADD. He told me that I was "far too intelligent to have ADD". And this was only ten years ago!

Ursy 07-29-2010 07:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by suebee (Post 162854)
"Does not pay attention. Easily distracted." But with me it was undiagnosed ADD. To this day I have to explain myself. I once told a friend who was a physician that I had ADD. He told me that I was "far too intelligent to have ADD". And this was only ten years ago!

Isn't it frustrating?

In a similar vein, I had a psychiatrist, who incorrectly diagnosed me as bipolar, tell me that I couldn't have asperger's because I was nothing like Mr Bean.

I can kinda lol about it now...

Apocalipstic 07-29-2010 07:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Liam (Post 162655)
I just watched Adam, a movie about a fellow aspergian. Has anyone else seen it? What did you think of it?

I have not seen it, will place on my Netflix list :) Thank you!

[quote=violaine;162763]
Quote:

Originally Posted by apocalipstic (Post 162503)
The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

did you ever try to explain to the teachers that you were listening, thinking, feeling, following, understanding . . . only to be met with something ELSE [negatively stated] about your tone of voice ? ? ? being called 'argumentative' in responding to how they so wrongly perceived you?

Yes, but I got that at home more. I was always in trouble for "talking back" which ot me was trying to explain in a logical and clear way what I meant. But it never flew.

Quote:

Originally Posted by urs (Post 162849)
I got that - well, I got branded "lazy". "Apply herself" was something that I heard a lot, as well as "daydreaming" - oh yes, and the "stop drawing during class" - I once got into big trouble for drawing on an exam once I'd answered all the questions that I could. But nobody had heard of Asperger's back then. I wonder if it would have been easier if they had? I guess so...

I saw it - awhile ago. I think I enjoyed it, could see myself in some of it (not all). I think some of it was a bit over-simplified but that could have been for the benefit of the masses who might not know a lot about people on the autistic spectrum... but overall, I think it was a pretty good movie. My favourite is Snow Cake, even though the character Sigourney Weaver played was more autistic than asperger's. I think her daughter was probably aspie.

I wish I could have tried, though it sounds like it would not have helped anyway - I would have been misinterpreted just like you described, Belle. I usually would just cry and be completely unable to advocate for myself or explain anything at all.

It's very frustrating to be so emotionally fragile!

I still am a daydreamer! :)

And yes, it is still very frustrating. I soemtimes think all my nerve endings are on the surface.

Quote:

Originally Posted by suebee (Post 162854)
"Does not pay attention. Easily distracted." But with me it was undiagnosed ADD. To this day I have to explain myself. I once told a friend who was a physician that I had ADD. He told me that I was "far too intelligent to have ADD". And this was only ten years ago!

UGH. Yes yes. I have ben told that I don't look like I have anything wrong, so I don't.

Quote:

Originally Posted by urs (Post 162855)
Isn't it frustrating?

In a similar vein, I had a psychiatrist, who incorrectly diagnosed me as bipolar, tell me that I couldn't have asperger's because I was nothing like Mr Bean.

I can kinda lol about it now...

Mr. Bean? Nice.

JazzGirl 07-30-2010 06:56 AM




Thank you to all who post here. I am seldom here but am pleased to find the writings of you all when I do visit. I do not feel so alone in the reading of your words.

I can relate. I recently was shocked but happy to hear another person in my life say, YOU have spent all of your life attempting to conform to the world. I believe it is time for the world to begin to conform to you. You are perfect just the way you are. One day the rest of the world will know that, too.

Jazzie















violaine 07-30-2010 01:50 PM

ursy wrote on emotional fragility - yes! i wear it on my sleeve, but as an adult, people have called it 'immature/unacceptable' behaviour, and might really take advantage of one who is super sensitive. there are so many ways too!.

Apocalipstic 07-30-2010 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violaine (Post 163967)
ursy wrote on emotional fragility - yes! i wear it on my sleeve, but as an adult, people have called it 'immature/unacceptable' behaviour, and might really take advantage of one who is super sensitive. there are so many ways too!.

I am trying to remove the people who stress me out or refuse to LISTEN to me one by one from my life.

violaine 08-01-2010 01:03 AM

i have not seen 'adam', but i really did like snow cake, urs!

the character opposite sigourney weaver in this film was awesome because he did not personalise 'her needs' - or trample all over what boundaries [the kitchen!] she needed to set in place in order to cope /just go on to the next step each day for her.

i loved that
.

Jess 08-03-2010 07:33 PM

Another thread was started regarding the Children's Hospital in Boston and reading through it I was lead to this article. I pray more Governors/ politicians will follow this lead!

http://childrenshospitalblog.org/aut...rate-new-bill/

christie 08-03-2010 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jess (Post 167545)
Another thread was started regarding the Children's Hospital in Boston and reading through it I was lead to this article. I pray more Governors/ politicians will follow this lead!

http://childrenshospitalblog.org/aut...rate-new-bill/

This is GREAT news! I wish that the awareness/treatments of today were in place when Bratboy was diagnosed - it would have made the journey less arduous.

violaine 08-11-2010 01:28 AM

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-10933276

10 August 2010 Last updated at 17:29 ET

A new brain scan which can detect autism with more than 90% accuracy has been developed by scientists from Kings College London.

The researchers say the scan should make diagnosis of the condition quicker and more straightforward, but some experts warn that more testing will be needed before the technique is rolled out to the public.

Jane Hughes reports.

violaine 09-05-2010 02:08 AM

friend of a friend :)
 
http://chaoticidealism.livejournal.com/82464.html


:moonstars:

FeminineAllure 09-06-2010 09:02 PM

I saw Adam a couple of weeks ago. I was curious so I rented it.
I enjoyed it. http://www.foxsearchlight.com/adam/

JazzGirl 09-21-2010 01:24 PM





Passing through seeking this place as a touchstone.

Love to you all!
Jazzie

christie 09-25-2010 07:09 AM

I have been meaning to post since Belle shared the link a while back of the blog - thanks, Belle! It came at a time when I really needed to read it!

As for Bratboy and his transition to VA and beginning his senior year at PCHS, we couldn't be more proud as to his progress. It was a lil touch and go at the beginning of the school year as he was moving from a very small, specialized school environment with less than 100 kids total in the school (K-12) and only about 6 in his grade level to a fully mainstreamed high school with over 1000 kids total and about 200 in his grade level. To say that he was a little overwhelmed is an understatement!

Riding the bus was a huge issue and just added to his stress level. Jess has been taxi driver extraordinaire and making the bus issue "one less thing" helped Bratboy navigate this huge change.

We couldn't ask for more support than from the staff at the high school. They go over and beyond to keep us informed, sometimes even on a daily basis. If there is a question or issue, you best bet that my crackberry will be dinging away with an email. We have really appreciated their quick response.

We had an IEP meeting yesterday to transfer his current IEP from TN to VA. The reports from all of his teachers - well, I couldn't have asked for better! It was also the last day of the first grading period and he has one 100, two B's and one C.

The 100 is in "resource" which is basically a study hall for him - a smaller class where he has the opportunity to have more individualized instruction if needed and a place to finish any classwork/homework assignments. The other classes are mainstream and he has very little accommodation/allowances. Even though he is dysgraphic and has traditionally been unable to handwrite at a rate to keep up, he has chosen to not utilize his laptop as covered by the IEP but to handwrite (in most instances) just like everyone else!

He is socializing with his peer group as opposed to kids who aren't his social equals - he has typically gravitated towards more differently abled kids or adults - never that equal population. One of his teachers is also the senior courtyard monitor and was telling us how he is usually one of the first out at lunch and she sees all the other kids gravitate towards him as they arrive. Rather than being, literally, on the outside of the group, he is right up in the middle of it!

While this might seem like a very small thing to most folks, its a huge thing for him and for us - its like he has reached the finish line of a race I have never been certain he would complete.

Wal-Mart is like the mall of our lil town. We can't go without him running into 6-7 kids that he knows. Last night, he went to the county fair and was telling us how he kept bouncing from group to group and it just made my heart swell to hear how he is finding community here.

One of the biggest issues I had with him in Nashville is that after school, he would go to his room and literally stay there, online (either XBox Live or some virtual reality site) until bedtime. Trying to get him to have an interest outside of virtual was like trying to move a mountain.

Now, I can't tell you all how many times watching him seeking us out, being engaged in life, has brought tears to my eyes. With my work demands, I am away from home about three-four days a week and he and Jess have really bonded and formed a relationship that has far exceeded my expectations. I love that they have this connection that is completely independent of me.

Jess has stepped into parenthood in a big way! Its never easy to be a step parent, in the best of circumstances, and I am so proud and grateful that Jess, without hesitation, has committed to that role.

I wish I could say that some of the hygiene/chore responsibility issues have magically disappeared. They haven't. But I will say that I am pleased with the progress already made and I am still hopeful that one day we will hit upon the magical button and these things will no longer be an issue. There is even a part of me that is ok with having these issues as I think they are pretty age appropriate and not related to his challenges.

He just had his 17th birthday last week. My baby is all grown up! I'm having Mommy issues!

All in all, life's pretty damned good. For the young man who was told just in May that he could not succeed in a mainstream highschool, I think he has already proven that to be just wrong. For the young man who basically came out of his room to forage for food, there are times when I wish he would go to his room to give us some alone time!

Thank you all for your encouragement and support. If I don't say it often enough, I appreciate your being here and sharing yourselves. Its often given me hope for him when I have had doubts and concerns as to life for my Aspie as an adult.

Big, mad gay love for you all,
Christie

Ursy 09-26-2010 08:22 AM

Wow Christie, that's wonderful stuff :)

I just love it when our kids surpass our wildest dreams for them. My Bek does that to me often - it's so heartening.

I just came in to post a request for you all, since we are all pretty blessed in our own ways... sometimes it's good to pay it forward.

My friend Tithen needs help in getting his voice (Dynavox Vmax) and an electric wheelchair. He is on the autistic spectrum, just like many of us. I would appreciate it greatly if you visited the link and watched Tithen's Vmax trial video so you can see just how important it is that he get this as soon as possible. Any donation, no matter how small, helps. Every little bit adds up.

http://www.angelfire.com/me5/lilking/Fundraising.html

And if you can't donate, that's ok - maybe you could spread the word? Every little bit helps. Tithen deserves his voice and his legs - please help him to get them!

Ursy 10-07-2010 07:33 AM

Rain Man was on television tonight, and I watched it with mixed feelings. I guess it was groundbreaking in its day, but what struck me more was how stereotypical it was... and something didn't ring true with Dustin Hoffman's portrayal for me (but nevertheless, I think he made a valiant effort). I was thinking how even today, it's referenced quite frequently when the topic of autism comes up... but watching it tonight I can tell you that that's not all there is to autism.

It was very interesting, nonetheless.

*ponders some more*

I just came up with an analogy!

Being on the autistic spectrum is kind of like having a photographic memory, but you have no control over when the shutter goes off!

Or is that just me? Lol. I remember the most random things with amazing precision... it's rarely useful.

Jude 10-28-2010 02:12 PM

Autistic Spectrum
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ursy (Post 204025)
Rain Man was on television tonight, and I watched it with mixed feelings. I guess it was groundbreaking in its day, but what struck me more was how stereotypical it was... and something didn't ring true with Dustin Hoffman's portrayal for me (but nevertheless, I think he made a valiant effort). I was thinking how even today, it's referenced quite frequently when the topic of autism comes up... but watching it tonight I can tell you that that's not all there is to autism.

It was very interesting, nonetheless.

*ponders some more*

I just came up with an analogy!

Being on the autistic spectrum is kind of like having a photographic memory, but you have no control over when the shutter goes off!

Or is that just me? Lol. I remember the most random things with amazing precision... it's rarely useful.

______________
That is one of many autistic traits. It's a spectrum. People with aspergers syndrome do tend to frequently have a superior ability to commit to memory, particularly amongst those topics of interest to themselves. And there are other people with aspergers who can't find their own belly button in a pinch.

Jude 10-28-2010 02:37 PM

Aspergers and "In Your Face"
 
Just posing one out of curiosity. Are there others who feel the need for more physical distance than the average person. I come from a family on the spectrum and suspect that I share some aspie charactertistics, most subtle.

What I have recently come to realize about myself is that I sometimes, even randomly, feel the almost desperate need to step away physically. I feel very uncomfortable when people are directly in my face addressing me. My daughter brought this up and I hadn't been consciously aware until now. Outside of very personal intimacy, I really don't like people's heads in my face or literally breathing down my neck. Friendly hugs are wonderful, but come with a time limit. Sometimes I just need to walk out in the midst of commotion and be alone for 10 minutes.

Does "IN YOUR FACE" send shudders up anyone elses' backbone?

Apocalipstic 10-28-2010 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jude (Post 216023)
Just posing one out of curiosity. Are there others who feel the need for more physical distance than the average person. I come from a family on the spectrum and suspect that I share some aspie characteristics, most subtle.

What I have recently come to realize about myself is that I sometimes, even randomly, feel the almost desperate need to step away physically. I feel very uncomfortable when people are directly in my face addressing me. My daughter brought this up and I hadn't been consciously aware until now. Outside of very personal intimacy, I really don't like people's heads in my face or literally breathing down my neck. Friendly hugs are wonderful, but come with a time limit. Sometimes I just need to walk out in the midst of commotion and be alone for 10 minutes.

Does "IN YOUR FACE" send shudders up anyone elses' backbone?

Ohhhh yes, I have huge personal space and especially creep out when someone stands behind me.

In fact, I keep rearranging my office trying to keep people from coming behind my desk. It makes me so tense I could shatter.

When I visit large cities like London or NYC I have to really focus on not freaking out...people get way closer than I am comfortable with. I look for openings in the crowd and go in and around quickly....but after I am so exhausted I feel like my brain is going to disintegrate. Spining doors are the worst. Why can't people stay in their own little partitions?

I have learned to like to hug, but really quickly unless I feel comfortable with the person.

People with poor personal space management creep me OUT.

And sometimes when people speak to me in parking lots, or buffets or when I am in my own world it freaks me out. I like to be left alone.


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