Good but tired.

I feel productive and I am finding some peace.

I'm feeling some trepidation. My sister is going to buzz my hair when she gets here Thursday. I know, I was going to do it this weekend, but I ended up just cutting off the length of it (about 12 inches) and that was traumatic enough. She will help me.

Also, I'm seeing my oncologist on Thursday. I get to find out what happened with all my labs after my first chemo treatment. The doc will determine what chemo treatments to try on my next visit. The side effects ended up being so awful . . . well, I just don't know. I don't know what to do, except keep on keeping on.

A little reflective, a little lonely, but mostly trying to be grateful.

Good. I finally reached my weight goal of losing 34 lbs. Had planned on meeting that goal by Jan 1, 2021. I’m a little late. Still, I made it.

New goal is to lose another 15 lbs by August 1. That’s about 4 lbs a month. Should be able to make that happen, but I won’t be hard on myself if I don’t.

:bow:

That's awesome- go you!


I feel good on day 5 of cycling. Today was inside due to rain but everything else has been outside.

I feel good overall, but I'm a little sneezy. I'm at my Mom's house, where everything is blooming. It's gorgeous outside, though! There a great big old dogwood tree covered with white blossoms right outside my bedroom window.

How was this meeting? I hope there's a tweaked plan in place?


I'm feeling so glad that it's Friday and I'm leaving work two hours early to go for a bike ride :)

Tired, feverish, arm's a little sore. Funny thing about it - COVID vaccine, didn't hurt at all, didn't really even feel it. It was the most painless shot I've ever had, but today ouch! J and I both have sore arms but her's not as much as mine. I can push my finger hard over the injection site, which is bruised and no pain at all, but all around it, my entire upper arm is sore? I think It might be because I slept on my side and woke up with my whole fat body weight pressing against that shoulder.

I feel so sad for people of color who live in the state of Georgia, after GOP passed Jim Crow era voter restrictive laws. If my home state did that I would be so upset. It is so un-American to take the right to vote away in such harsh terms. People will be arrested for handing out bottled water or food to help with the horrible wait times imposed on voters who live in Georgia.

Sad, upset and angry, is how I feel for people who are facing disenfranchisement of the worst, horrible kind.

Feeling
 

I think I may be coming out of my slump but I am not pushing it. I have lost some good weight after eating a muffin or toast for breakfast and one other meal of fish and a veggie. I think that's healthy till I feel like I want more.

The exam was short. The oncologist said there was no new growth. He told me to take Zyrtec for my back pain :| Isn't Zyrtec an antihistamine? I don't get it, but I'll try it. He seemed quite convinced it would help, and so did his fellow/doctor-in-training, who was present. He didn't fill me in on how he might have tweaked my plan, so I guess I'll find out more when I go in for the treatment.

In related news, my sister and I drove a couple of hundred miles together last night, and we chatted the entire time. She told me that during the first treatment, I went to sleep several times (which I don't remember). She also said that whenever I had a bad reaction, they would stop the treatment for awhile and pump me full of Benadryl (probably why I don't remember sleeping). I was bemused to learn that I woke up once feeling good and said something like, "This is great! If this is what it's going to be like, I can handle this no problem!" Wish I knew what was in that bag, and if I'm going to get it every time.

For thread compliance, right now I am feeling: kind of lumpy. I'm sleeping on a bed at my mom's house, and it can't compare to the bed I have at home. It's comfortable enough, though, and I've slept on it many times before. If I can just get to sleep, I'll wake up feeling great.

This is infuriating. The worst part of the new laws, I think, is that it allows the GOP to dissolve the County Boards of Elections, and put their own appointees in to run the elections. The Democrats are going to have to monitor the elections very closely to point out incidents of voter intimidation.

I am feeling the progress. I love the feeling of accomplishment, no matter what it is in. :mohawk:

I feel super lucky today. While out shopping for gifts for my honey, the lady who helped me at the store told me about a place I could call to see if I could get a Covid Vaccine shot. OMG, I called when I got back from shopping and the clinic scheduled me for my vaccine in a week and a half. The universe absolutely knows how happy I am and how lucky I feel. :blueheels:

Def try the Zyrtec. They told me to use Claritin. It was one of those... someone discovered this while in chemo and taking Claritin for allergies that their bone pain went away. When I had my first round of chemo and then they gave me that shot that increases white blood cells (the shot is supposed to be what causes the bone pain) I woke up that night literally feeling like I could feel and hear every bone in my body snapping. It was terrifying. I'd taken a claritin that morning but took another that night and the bone pain went away in an hour. From then on I always took claritin for my first few days after treatments and the pain was never that bad again.

I'm feeling so grateful for my mom and my sister. We had a great weekend together.

Today was an emotionally tiring day. However, it is almost over and I keep pushing. I feel hopeful and grateful today.

Depressed. I keep saying I can handle my own meds but nobody believes me. Well even I wouldn't let myself run out of Xanax. I'm not that forgetful. Sheesh.

Anxious... about a lot of things.

Feeling
 

Feeling like everyone deserves a second chance.

Feeling pretty good, 28 hours post-chemo. I've got some new meds for joint pain.

My heart hurts tonight.

My boys are Black. Rico is Black. The George Floyd trial. My heart hurts for the survivors of George Floyd. My heart hurts for the pain people witnessed and endured while George Floyd lost his life. My heart hurts for my boys and Rico. I know my boys experience first hand. Rico's, only because of what he shares about that part of his life.

Police brutality and White Supremacy must be eradicated from American society. The GOP must go. I gotta stop there, for right now.

Burned out.

Everything feels like a bit of a project. And I don't have the mental focus for another virtual meeting.

I miss seeing people, in person. And as an introvert, that is not something I ever thought I would say.

Overwhelmed... but excited. And ready to plan the next adventure.

I am feeling determined. No matter what is thrown at me - I WILL overcome it.

Overwhelmed, tired and hungry

Pretty well, pretty well. Only mild chemo symptoms, easily ignored. Ready to do some work, and maybe some crafts.

Tired and grumpy. Didn’t sleep well. Arm is hurting way more than when I was initially inoculated. Tylenol and melatonin did not help. And still haven’t adjusted to the eastern time zone. There was a dusting of snow on the ground when I got up and the weather man was excited because it may get to the mid 30s today.

Determined to feel different...

I feel loved today and happy that I am able to reciprocate that love by helping my sister get back to being herself.

I feel pretty happy - and this great weather is helping a whole hell of a lot.

I'm feeling very comfortable - the door is open letting in a breeze, free from pollen because it has rained all day.

I am feeling pretty broke at the moment because I just did my taxes. They did not work out the way they were supposed to and I ended up owing a lot; I even had to pay a penalty. I need to investigate that and change my W-2s.

Like utter crap

we still do not know whats going on with my health