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my mind is on others and how the man with no shoes thought he had it bad until he met the man with no feet.
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Another Friday night with a bottle of Arkansas wine
Why does it have to be so good I finished the whole damn bottle..............again Some may say they see a pattern here I see nothing right now, really |
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This my friend is sad even in my inebriated state I feel you and hear you |
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Thank you for sharing this and wow this truly humbled me |
something is really not right inside me. This surgery isnt happening soon enough...
....hurting.... |
------CANCER------
Somebody needs to STOP this evil bastard NOW!!! |
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Oh whats on my mind is this allergy or respitory thing I have had for so long and cant get rid of.The doc said its allergys but im haveing asthma probs with it from all its doing to me.Not good at all.
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Tuesday I need to call and make an appointment. The longer I wait, the more I build it up inside and if I keep that up, it might be too large of a fear for me to overcome.
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Clear Blue Easy
I am generally quite comfortable being a transman and I rarely covet cisgendered males.Speaking for myself,I find it to be a waste of time longing for the things cisgendered males have that I do not.We are far from the medical advances that could provide these things,so I do not torment myself with coveting.I do have one wish and that is to get a text msg with the words "I´m late".That would be the ultimate for this guy...
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I am confused. I have spent some time reading today...reading threads about FTM/Butch/Transgender/Transsexual ID's. I'm sure that I missed a few and that was from just one thread. When I first discovered "Butch/Femme" websites, my world of knowledge was very small. I didn't even know that there was such a person as a Femme. Then I learned more and more and more about different identities and even biases. I have discovered so much about myself in the past 6 years but I am old enough to understand that LIFE is discovery and change and moving forward and stumbling backward.
I guess I started this post because I am lost as to who I am. I'm sure there is a thread about this but I didn't look. I don't know how I identify. I thought I did before I started reading but I must now admit that I unjustly put Butches and Femmes into two boxes, all the while reacting with righteous indignation when straight people lump us all into one box. The spectrum of "Butch" is ever expanding for me and my confusion is rooted in the fact that I don't know where I fit in that spectrum. I am more than one person. I am someone different at work than I am at home. I am different at B/F functions than I am with my family. The only place I truly feel that I can change and evolve into my ultimate self is at home, with my beautiful wife. When I talk to her about my feelings and confusion, she always says that she will love me no matter what changes I do or don't make, chemically, physically, mentally or emotionally. She just loves me. She doesnt have a person in mind that she needs or wants me to be. It brings tears to my eyes when I think about that. My entire life has been about being what people wanted me to be. Maybe that's the root of my confusion. I don't have to be a chameleon. Maybe it was easier for me to figure out what other people wanted than to figure out who I really am and what I really want. Apologies to all if this isnt the right thread...that is all. |
Enjoying this wonderful (almost) humid free day. This is a wonderful time of year here. The leaves are starting to turn and dance through the air and driving through them reminds me of playing in them as a child. It is football time in Tennessee...people are everywhere. The area has turned into a never ending sea of orange and white. People are yelling out the windows of their cars and screaming like lunitics. "Rocky Top" is blaring from most everywhere and the traffic is horrendous.
god i love this town.... http://dl10.glitter-graphics.net/pub...nrdjwhr0g7.jpg |
I am human
I am allowed to make mistakes I am not perfect, nor will I ever be I'm not meant to be a daddy I am allowed to cry and not feel guilt I have no intention of ever being on my knees for anyone ever again ... |
Don't ask me a question...unless you want an honest answer...
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That when I woke up this morning, I woke up slowly as I do every morning... yet My thoughts drifted to My girl and a smile played upon My lips.. for the memories we have made and those that are to be made. Tis a good thing to have faith and hope. No matter what you have been through in the past.. never let go of those two things. Though we can not predict the future, nor erase the past.. we can always have hope and faith in all things. I believe the Sun is shining a little brighter today in My world.
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Lots of things on my mind today...
Will I be able to get myself out of my financial bind. Will I ever live better than pay check to pay check. the betrayal of a friend.. now lost I suppose. Just plain sad. Gonna do some things to get my mind off my troubles... |
contemplating if something I heard is really what I think I heard.... and knowing in my heart that if I did hear correctly that the outcome will be devastating for me. (w) |
((((((Soon)))))) :gonnacry:
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