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Another line I have heard more than once is....
"Baybah, you just havent found tha raaiight Mayn" My go to answer is... "and let me guess, YOU are the chosen one" :| |
You know, sweetie, my lips won't just kiss themselves...
(i never thought it would work. it did. we're married now.) |
one used on me...
in my early 20s,in a str8 bar with a some friends...guy is eyeing me for some time...after a few "courage" drinks he walks over to me and my friends and starts chatting me up..im civil but not paying much attention to it...he leans WAY too far in my space and loudly says "i like to eat pussy" without missing a beat i turned to him,smiled, and said "what a coincidence so do i"...my friends fell out of their chairs laughing. one i have used--ONLY once! lol mid to late 20s...gay bar..drunk beyond words..standing at bar talking to bartender,and this woman walks up with this HUGE breasts..i turn,offer to buy her a drink and in same breath(looking AT her breasts) i say "im gonna need a soft pillow for my head,can you come home with me?" |
It never works when I used my Slingblade voice to try to hit on my G/F.
Seems sexy to me. |
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my go to answer? you're not woman enough to be my man. :readfineprint: |
I totally forgot about this one:
" 'Medusa' huh? I can be your Perseus!!" (Yeah, cause every woman wants to have her head cut off and used to kill a sea creature) |
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Dylan...I've tried it with Mahhh Woman too, and she's not amused (to say the least) |
One of the WORST I have ever heard...
I was 18..He was around the same age.. He says.."I'd like to kiss you. But, I am afraid I might suffer by comparison." This line is from the movie 'Footloose'....I almost puked. I wasn't even amused. Especially since the guy had just gone to that movie a couple of days before with me and my little sister...and he was HER DATE! |
another one, not tried on me as much as the entire bar:
the lights are going up, the music has been turned off and people are filing out, one young (and possibly not sober) butch yells: WHO'S SINGLE?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dunno if it worked but she got a lot of laughs. |
Over at the driving range, there's a bunch of old coots who hang out and gossip and drink.
One day I happened to be nearby, idly chitchatting, and this well-preserved-by-scotch octogenarian looked me over, smiled, and said, "You look like you'd make a good farmer's wife!" "Why's that?" I asked. "Because you look like you know how to operate heavy machinery AND birth some healthy babies!" And he grinned at me with a twinkle in his cataract-clouded eye, like he'd just paid me the biggest compliment he knew how to give. Which it probably was. |
Referring to a Sleep Number .....
Whats your number? Mines 69 should we see what yours is? |
A vivid memory popped back into my mind that had been hidden for a couple years....
My ex and I were at a hole in the wall pool hall. We were up at the bar ordering a beer, when the cuestick that was leaning up against the bar beside me fell over. I reached over to pick it up and hand it to the guy in the bbq stained tshirt standing next to me, and he said, "Oh darlin, if it was MY stick that hit you, you would have thanked me". |
Lord, what a loser...Those are the fools that probably have a dick the size of a gherkin....
And, what did you say back to him after he said that??? Quote:
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"You have the kind of beauty that men have waged wars over"
Truth be told, this one sort of worked (or at least I considered for just a few moments) |
An all time classic for me... lol
When you hug someone.. If they say.. "You smell good, What are you wearing?" You reply back and say.. "You later" lol |
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:blink: Nooo not You? Loss for words?? omg (clenches heart) Wowwwwwwwwwwwwww... :raspberry:
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