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-   -   How romantic are you? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=6509)

wahya 04-19-2013 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daktari (Post 785626)
Was that because you smelled when stressed and called her 'my petit cabbage'? :raspberry:

Yeah..I think that had to be it! Wow that's what it had to be. Well I better cancel my therapy appt now. lol

Talon 04-19-2013 03:24 PM

Honestly, I don't think that I am a romantic...hopeless or otherwise...at least not in the traditional sense of the word.

thedivahrrrself 04-19-2013 03:49 PM

I think I am too much of a klutz to pull off romance. LOL And I'm a terrible liar so keeping surprises to myself is very hard for me.

I do make very sweet mix tapes :) And I do special things for the person I love. I just don't pull them off in a way that screams "romance". It's more likely to be like, "Look! I made you heart-shaped cookies," and then I drop the tray all over the floor.

I don't find the traditional "romantic" things to be all that romantic. I wish I had seen the flowers in South America, though, before I made a blanket statement about hating flowers. As it turns out, I just hate roses...and carnations.

I like to be romanced a little. Too much can be kind of awkward I think. But it's nice to know the person you love appreciates you and cares about the things you enjoy. There are few things more romantic than watching stars together, in my opinion, so U planning a surprise trip to the planetarium was a super sweet gesture. Sending his friends back to buy and then secretly transport a drum I fell in love with at a craft fair probably tops my list of the most romantic things anyone's ever done for me. I was completely surprised. Spontaneity definitely adds to the romance.

Metro 04-19-2013 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGG (Post 785594)
I am very romantic but I don't kiss and tell so you just have to find out on your own.

My thoughts exactly...

KCBUTCH 04-19-2013 04:30 PM

I would say I am not romantic- but passionate and sensual, direct...I can be romantic but I would not say I myself am...

CherryBlonde 04-19-2013 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daktari (Post 785603)
May I ask what is it about displaying good manners (ie. holding doors open) that makes them a romantic gesture instead of normal behaviour with everyone?

Romance, like most things, is subjective. I'm with you Words, a simple act merely to please is as romantic as the traditional grand gestures.

What makes it romantic and chivalrous is the fact that not everyone does do it. In fact a lot of people dont do it. It says something about a person that treats me and others like that all the time. It says they care and are caring. It also says they care enough to make me feel special and make me feel safe and protected. Everything doesnt have to be a grand gesture. It's the little things that count too but to say that opening doors and walking on the outside of the sidewalk is not romantic and chivalrous is in itself an unromantic comment.

Semantics 04-19-2013 05:33 PM

I think unromantic comments do it for me.

Questioning the norm is true chivalry. I'm pretty sure I read that once in Andreas Capellanus's The Art of Courtly Love, but then again my Latin is a bit rusty.

wahya 04-19-2013 07:42 PM

@ Daktari..No not offended at all, Actually not only was my ex gf Penelope. But my daughter is too. So I got teased by both! lol But my romantic ways I like to add a little humor in the mix. Cause if it fails..Well at least I get a laugh out of it. ha ha.

princessbelle 04-19-2013 07:54 PM

I'm a die-hard romantic.

Romance, to me, is knowing another's needs before they have to ask for things and doing extra things that they would never expect just to make someone happy.

Come to think of it, i even romance myself. Being good to "ourselves" is just as important.

I buy myself flowers, i take myself out to eat with candle-light dinners. I give myself "days off" and just veg out and read a good book and then take a long bath.

Romance is a place in the mind that is safe and calm and peaceful and more than that, and if i'm being romantic with someone or just alone, it makes my feelers happy. :)


PaPa 04-19-2013 08:13 PM

I have been told many times that I am a romantic at heart. A friend recently reminded me of one Valentine's Day when I bought my partner an item from every letter of the alphabet and put it into a basket and called it my alphabet of love for you. It had everything imaginable in it. She said the only reason she remembered that was because she always wished she could find a partner who put so much love and care into a present for her. That is just one example. I can also remember doing treasure hunts with clues of things we would know from within or outside our home or places where we visited often as a couple. The next clue would be in that spot. All in fun. It helps keep the relationship alive. I miss it sometimes.

Enchantress 04-19-2013 08:23 PM

The art of romance ...
 
I'm the kind of girl who believes in fairy tales. Wants the prince and longs for chivalry.

I believe in lovers, soulful communication, breathtaking moments, and deep abiding intimacy. I want to be wooed, tantalized and taken.

But, in return, I will bake you cookies just because, write you letters filled with sweet nothings and salacious bits. Cook your favorite meal and serve it with a kiss and a caress and sweep you off your feet as well. I believe in equal opportunity romantic gestures. Because, isn't that the beauty of love?

So am I romantic? Quite.

Daktari 04-20-2013 07:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CherryBlonde (Post 785797)
What makes it romantic and chivalrous is the fact that not everyone does do it. In fact a lot of people dont do it. It says something about a person that treats me and others like that all the time. It says they care and are caring. It also says they care enough to make me feel special and make me feel safe and protected. Everything doesnt have to be a grand gesture. It's the little things that count too but to say that opening doors and walking on the outside of the sidewalk is not romantic and chivalrous is in itself an unromantic comment.

Let me clarify please; You're saying believing that good manners is everyday, normal behaviour and not chivalrous is being unromantic?

I'll own that!

I prefer to treat all the folks around me in that courteous, polite way. It's part of my personal code of ethics and I understand that not everyone thinks such behaviour to be the norm. Maybe it's a generational thing?
I can do plenty of other things that make a women feel special, protected and thoroughly 'romanticated'.

:chaplin:

SuddenlyWestFemme 04-20-2013 10:06 AM

My ex was neither romantic nor polite (but I was in love anyway). I stopped thinking about romance as important. And then the first date I went on after we broke up (way before I was ready to date) was with a very polite and romantic Butch and it just felt so wonderful. For me, it is like a light switch... turn it on and I light up. When off, I don't remember how great the light feels.

And in regards to manners versus romance. Personally, I consider holding the car door open as romantic and not just polite. Where I grew up, this was not done in general--so it is not a 'back in my day' kind of thing. Car door opening was ONLY done in dating situations (well... or if someone's hands were full and they couldn't do it themselves). Maybe it is different geographically? So I associate it with the excitement of dating and do consider it romantic. Now, not letting the house door slam on, or holding open the building door is just being polite (in my book).

I do agree with Dakarti in general. Being polite is not romantic--it is just the right thing to do. But polite can mean different things culturally... so I classify things as romantic that others may think are just basic manners and visa versa.

I am a spontaneous romantic (in the way Hollylane mentioned earlier-- stealing a kiss, being the first to link arms, making last minute decisions to take a walk in the moonlight, and other little spontaneous things).

Question on romance (that was coincidentally bought up at work yesterday): If someone brings flowers to every girl they've ever dated on the 2nd date... well... is it romance or dating routine? If someone gives every person they've ever dated a handmade picture album, filled with pictures of the two of you, for Christmas... is it romantic or dating routine? Any thoughts on the difference between romance and dating routines...or if they are the same thing. Does it even matter?

Heavenleahangel 04-20-2013 12:03 PM

I would love to give new meaning to the words "Romancing the Stone!" Ohhhhh the possibilities!!!! ***I have been known for bad jokes***

ValentineTomboy 04-20-2013 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daktari (Post 786130)
Let me clarify please; You're saying believing that good manners is everyday, normal behaviour and not chivalrous is being unromantic?

I'll own that!

I prefer to treat all the folks around me in that courteous, polite way. It's part of my personal code of ethics and I understand that not everyone thinks such behaviour to be the norm. Maybe it's a generational thing?
I can do plenty of other things that make a women feel special, protected and thoroughly 'romanticated'.

Being courteous, polite, and just plain using manners in general is not the norm anymore. I wish it was but it isnt. We all SHOULD be treating each other with kindness and respect but we dont. If we we did the world certianly not be in the state it is right now. Why is it chivlrous and romantic to use manners and be polite you ask. Because not everyone does it anymore. It's a lost art of a sort. Besides that what is romantic and chivlrous to one person and between two people is between them and not for anyone else to judge whether it is or is not romantic and chivlrous. You do your thing and I'll do mine. The topic of this thread is "How romantic are you", it's not "Pass judgement on other people's definition of romance".

TenderDaddy 04-20-2013 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ValentineTomboy (Post 786237)
Being courteous, polite, and just plain using manners in general is not the norm anymore. I wish it was but it isnt. We all SHOULD be treating each other with kindness and respect but we dont. If we we did the world certianly not be in the state it is right now. Why is it chivlrous and romantic to use manners and be polite you ask. Because not everyone does it anymore. It's a lost art of a sort. Besides that what is romantic and chivlrous to one person and between two people is between them and not for anyone else to judge whether it is or is not romantic and chivlrous. You do your thing and I'll do mine. The topic of this thread is "How romantic are you", it's not "Pass judgement on other people's definition of romance".

Well said VT. I couldn't agree more.

Chancie 04-20-2013 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuddenlyWestFemme

<snip>

If someone brings flowers to every girl they've ever dated on the 2nd date... well... is it romance or dating routine? If someone gives every person they've ever dated a handmade picture album, filled with pictures of the two of you, for Christmas... is it romantic or dating routine? Any thoughts on the difference between romance and dating routines...or if they are the same thing. Does it even matter?

This is a great question!

Years ago, before I met my beautiful handsome Pete,

I dated a bit more than I expected.

One particular butch was courting me, and quite deftly.

She charmed my pants off, but

It became clear that her gallant ways were well practiced.

She was a lovely person, truly, but

I prefer Pete's slightly awkward attempts to impress me.

VeganDebbie 04-20-2013 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Apocalipstic (Post 785617)
I'm not romantic.
But I want to be.
Someday.

You and me both.....

Daktari 04-20-2013 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ValentineTomboy (Post 786237)
Being courteous, polite, and just plain using manners in general is not the norm anymore. I wish it was but it isnt. We all SHOULD be treating each other with kindness and respect but we dont. If we we did the world certianly not be in the state it is right now. Why is it chivlrous and romantic to use manners and be polite you ask. Because not everyone does it anymore. It's a lost art of a sort. Besides that what is romantic and chivlrous to one person and between two people is between them and not for anyone else to judge whether it is or is not romantic and chivlrous. You do your thing and I'll do mine. The topic of this thread is "How romantic are you", it's not "Pass judgement on other people's definition of romance".

Maybe it's a cultural thing. In my experience most folks are generally polite and courteous.

I asked a question. What is it that makes manners and perceived chivalry romantic? I have your answer. I'm sorry you live somewhere that folks aren't polite and courteous in every day life. Thanks for taking the time and trouble to explain.
:chaplin:

Bard 04-20-2013 01:46 PM

I would say I am romantic however I should defer to my beautiful wife as to weather or not I am


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