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Just posted on Fb... :|
"Opinions are like orgasms..Mine matters most, and i could care less if you have one" |
love this
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Introductions
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This was too cute...lol
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Quote:
Someone once argued with me that it was not possible for adult bears to be cute. Only cubs can be cute was their argument. I got a whole lot of "whatever" to say to that! |
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Unfortunately, this isn't just my mother. It is every member of my family. :|
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net...29424871_n.jpg |
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Why yes, this fits me perfectly.
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net...94504557_n.jpg |
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My friend emailed this to me.
Smart ass answers. Quote:
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Best place for them.
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Quote:
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"To All The Girls I've Loved Before"......
sorry was having a Julio Iglesais minute :| well it was random :cheesy: |
Boner baby
My heart has a boner for funny people. |
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I seem to have misplaced the earphones for my iPhone.
I am not in the habit of misplacing things. |
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Dancing with strangers
I am exceptionally skilled at getting in peoples way. If I find myself walking down a sidewalk, through a hallway, or across a wide-open field and another person is walking directly towards me, it’s as if we suddenly become confined in a tiny, invisible space. As we go to step out of each other’s way I will, and without fail, always step to the same side that they do leaving us awkwardly face to face again. This of course leads to the frustrating process of moving left and right together trying to step around the other person repeatedly muttering things like, “Excuse me” and “Oh, I’m sorry.” Eventually both parties step out of the way to let the other one pass, and then both attempt to take the others offer leading us right back into the beginning nose-to-nose position. It’s a vicious circle that I find myself repeating numerous times a week. I don’t even try to avoid the situation anymore, as I spot the other person walking towards me in the distance, I breathe a heavy sigh and prepare to dance.
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AHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
One winter morning a husband and wife in Cornerbrook were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snowploughs can get through." So the good wife went out and moved her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snowploughs can get through."The good wife went out and moved her car again. The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park...." Then the electric power went out. The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "Damn honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowploughs can get through?" With the love and understanding in his voice, that all men who are married to blonde women exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?" |
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