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As I road past the plastic recycle bin at work I tossed my empty bottle toward the 4 foot square bin, and missed it. I thought huh WTF? Then a memory hit me, years ago when I was young and stupid. I was a pro at hitting signs and mailboxes with empty beer bottles and now I can't hit a 4x4 box. LOL I could hit a target from the drivers side throwing over the top of the car. Damn I'm getting rusty in my old age. HUH? Old age, damn!
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Walked out my front door to see that my neighbor had a huge painted metal rooster in her flower bed..........lmao it's cute.
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Oh my goodness..I was so busted. I just had to go with the flow..
Hadn't had a customer in the store for a few hours, so I started trying on clothes. I had slipped a dress on over what I was wearing and then it happened. Customer came in. I kinda hid behind some mannequins, but she came right to me. I helped this customer, with a teal short dress on over my long pink dress. Oh, I'm sure she questioned my fashion sense. But it didn't help, when my co Mgr came out and tried not to laugh. Yes , I admit it. Sometimes I'm a dork! |
[nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gwvXtfRjonc"]Cyanide & Happiness - The Rope - YouTube[/nomedia]
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sooo
I was walking down the hall at the assisted living facility where my client lives... I passed by these two older gentlemen that I am friendly with (we share a love of the Patriots). They were engaged in a conversation with someone else so I didn't stop...I just barely got buy and S***** says, "Now THAT one..." and pauses as I walk further away down the hallway, then continues "she is va va voom..." and made a remark about my ummmm lady assets... :blink: Funny how as we age we again forget how sound travels! ....but ummm... thank you boys :blush: |
The Christmas Elf of course.....she will be 3 in December.
LTB sent me a picture of her today....she was sitting in her big girl bed, covered up to her waist, reading a book(of course she can't read yet), wearing her University of North Carolina football helmet....OMG I cracked up. How could that happen that I would have a Christmas Elf that loved football as much as me and her Daddy. I hate UNC, but I don't care who she yells for as long as she loves football. Looks like it is happening. |
My family from NJ came up to visit for the weekend, and my nephews came along. Today, we went to a nice, big park in New Haven, CT, and at one point we spent some time on the swings. The older one, Nate, kept going higher and higher and wanted to do a peak jump off.
As he was getting ready to jump, this little boy, couldn't have been older than 6 years, casually walked in front of where he was and smiled big with a blue plastic bag in hand and did this twirly thing with it, then proceeded to dip it low and then he started TWERKING for a good minute or two. In front of my nephew. My nephew got twerk blocked, and for that I was dying. If there was ever a time where I regretted not having video ready, that was it. |
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Ok, I admit it. I had no idea whatsoever what twerking meant. I had to look it up on Wiki. In case someone else lives in a cave like I clearly do; I will help you out: "Twerking is a dance move that involves a person, usually a woman, shaking her hips in an up-and-down bouncing motion, causing the dancer to shake, "wobble" and "jiggle." According to the Oxford Dictionary Online, to twerk is "to dance to popular music in a sexually provocative manner involving thrusting hip movements and a low, squatting stance". :| |
don't know why this is funny...........but to me it is
https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/i...fNYoYbv3i_qfCj |
Being fed waffles in bed. We were both laughing so hard at the silly noises he was making with each bite. I hope the hotel laundry will be able to get the syrup out of the sheets. LOL
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It shouldn't have been funny, and some of you might be horrified at me. But here goes: My three-legged cat trying to dig in the litter box with his stump, which accomplished absolutely nothing.
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My own fully not appropriate but caused by extreme tiredness at the (supposed) end to a long day head shaking and laughing at myself moment came late last night, when the painters told me we had a problem; that the paint was lighter than the tinted primer. Of course, none of us noticed this until several rooms were coated with the too dark primer.
The guy at the paint store mixed the cans and paint percentages up and now the walls are the perfect color but it's primer and flat and not satiny and light goodness like it's supposed to be. And it's not just one can. It's several. Oy vey. Nothing like having to stop a project that we thought was almost done at a reasonable hour, regroup and attack a whole different part of the project that wasn't even supposed to be touched yesterday (and thusly was not properly prepared, costing even more time and energy). I'm still shaking my head. Only in my world... |
What cracked me up...??
Neighbor boy after a long day of emotional highs and lows at play... referencing the General: "I've only known her for a little bit, but whew..." :blink: Ahahahahaaaaaaa :rofl: |
Watching the Best of Whose Line is it Anyways? and we saw this one .
I'm so glad that show is back. It's absolutely awesome and funny. |
SUPERMAN
Saturday morning a tiny boy maybe four yrs old, was standing outside his tent in his Superman underwear and Tshirt watching three deer walk beside his camp. He was so quiet watching the deer.
After they moved on, I looked back over toward Superman's camp and he came running out of his driveway with a red cape flying behind him. Me and my camping buddy called him Superman the rest of the weekend. I had to laugh at this. It reminded me of my cousin and I Forty five years ago, running threw Gigi's house playing Batman and Robin....Nana nana nana nana Batmannnnn LOL |
Syr <3
Oh Em Gee..
my Syr singing "my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard" Now.. You KNOW that;s fucking hilarious. |
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This is gonna be one of those gifts that keeps on giving. :rofl: |
two things on my way to my second client...
First, I saw an elderly lady pausing on her walk....wondering if she was ok, I slowed down to see what was wrong....she was answering her cell phone...it just tickles me when old people use them....my mom included :| Secondly, I stopped at Mcd's to get a coffee (I'm soooo addicted to their pumpkin spice!) and the lady handed me the coffee and a....straw....and I told her the straws have gotten WICKED tiny! She agreed. And then we both realized simultaneously that it was a stir stick and not the intended straw....it wasn't even first thing in the morning so there's no excuse.... |
afternoon chit chat///
Syr in the living room says to me with a smile~
"So, if I grab your cock does that make Me a <edited>?" me to Syr, wicked evil smile says in return ~ "Well of course it does, Syr.... (whispers) <edited>" <3 Hell Yes :daddy: |
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I will take you boy says really? Me..... you (boy) you let out the abyss |
honeybarbara's post.
"...but it's the farm animals that really bother me" My first outloud laugh of the day. |
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I actually had to laugh at the Florida/Tennessee football game. The first half was like watching 22 clowns play offense. Both teams were ridiculous. The defenses should sleep good tonight.
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I went shopping at Whole Foods today...I was going through the bakery and they had samples of pecan pie....with a big sign underneath it that read, "contains nuts". :blink: No way....really??? I had a good giggle over that with the tres gay bakery dude...and walking through the store...cuz I couldn't stop laughing....it just struck me the right way... :)
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In the month or so since I've seen my client that has the African Grey Parrot....
He has always imitated the dogs and cats in the house....but now...he barks, then admonishes himself, "NOOOO Barking!!" or barks and then says, "Stop it!" It cracked me up and got me through a hellish day. *see what pissed you off today for the yang of the story...... |
This did...
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My brother and I were standing in the checkout line at the grocers about a week ago. Upon glancing at the cover on one of the tabloids (which had some crazy headline) with raised, disconcerted eyebrow, I asked, "who is that?!"
Now my eyebrows are furrowed... He laughs hard, shakes his head at me with the others that hear and says, "ha! that is a kardashian"! some woman, I think he said Kim kardashian. |
[nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKLnhuzh9uY"]Girls Don't Poop - PooPourri.com - YouTube[/nomedia]
I HAD to google to make sure this wasn't a gag....it isn't :| |
Because the pet store was having a HUGE sale ...Blade couldn't pass up buying a Nemo outfit for his 6 pound chihuahua ....OMG MY RIBS STILL HURT FROM LAUGHING
that poor dog! Dressed up like Nemo the orange clown fish ! I so wish we could have got this on YouTube ! When we were done posing Nemo for pictures ...OMG! You shoulda seen Skippy running thru the yard in Nemo outfit with his eyes covered by the little hood that's embroidered with fish eyes and a huge fish fin sticking out above his ears...he was running completely blind but OUT RUNNING Blade! As soon as Blade reached for him, Nemo changed directions!!! I WAS LITERALLY ROLLING ON THE GROUND LAUGHING! This blinded doggy in a BRIGHT ORANGE FISH SUIT made it all the way up the hill before being scooped up....Blade needs a fishing net to catch a chihuahua !!! |
I had a tootsie pop...cuz I raided the Halloween candy....:eatinghersheybar:
I gave the lollipop stick to my pit bull sister, Mae Mobley...just to see what she would do.... She worked that little lollipop stick like it was a bone...laid in the grass with that tiny thing between her massive paws...and didn't let any of the other dogs near her while she had it. She walked around with the stick just barely visible sticking out of her massive jaws...she reminded me of Telly Savalas lol She got every tiny little speck of candy off that stick...You'd think I had given her a marrow bone.... it was just beyond adorable It's just such an irony that a dog known for it's power and teeth worked something so delicate in such a nimble manner....she didn't rip it or anything. It was only slightly bent when I finally took it away from her.... :) |
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2799/...c43016c2_o.jpg
For those too young to know what I mean....lol |
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Today was crazy hair day at the kids school. Did my daughters hair in a Crazy Eyes (OITNB) hairdo, complete with little rainbow colored ribbons to hold her hair in place, she looked adorable!!! My son had a multicolored Jersey Shore hairdo, they looked hysterical!
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My mother....
I was trying to introduce her to online dating...it's about time! She been single for many moons now...anywho... I was walking her through the process...and it got to where she needed a handle...and I explained...this is the name that people will see you by...and she says..."I want to be 'naughty girl'". :| The apple and the tree y'all....lol |
This totally cracked me up...Star Trek will never be the same...LOL
https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hpho...08354183_n.jpg |
yet again....
My mother.... :blush:
She was singing a Christmas song....to the dogs...using creative license to change the words.... "he sees you when you're sleeping....he knows when you're in the cat box..." My family tree is actually of the nut variety apparently...lol |
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