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- text messages, phone conversations & emails - people, who really go beyond themselves to ensure you smile & know someone is there.. - extending myself to a dear friend, knowing she needed that as well.. (paying it forward) - life , smiles, & deep conversations - still having the ability to trust, be honest & still aim for positive all things i'm really appreciating today... - on a sour note though, i'm feverish and sickies today - but feeling better already from last night, which is a great thing, thinkin' it will pass quickly! |
Quote:
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my mind is filled with dreams
ones that only i can fullfill and of course boarding. i need my outlet and JEP |
I'm wondering why I can't get to page 261?????
~~~shark~~~~~~~~~ |
So it is winter and we've been getting much more snow than we usually do here in Tennessee. It's been snowing tonight and we're forecasted several inches for Monday. When I was a kid I LOVED snow. We didn't have to go to school. Then the sledding, snow ball fights, snow cream, hot chocolate, defrosting by a hot fire. Now that I'm an adult, snow isn't quite as fun. Driving in it is a bitch, you worry about getting to and from work, wrecking or someone hitting you, it takes a lot longer to get the truck ready to drive in. The cold seems to affect me more now and I really don't want to sled in it.
There's like an internal struggle inside of me. It's become a love/hate relationship. No matter how dangerous it is, it is still so beautiful. It seems to cleanse the earth, a new beginning. I'll curse the snow when I am trying to drive home in it but when I'm safe and warm I'm excited like a little kid. I'm taken back to my childhood. I have such a vivid memory of being at my gramma's house in Wisconsin. It was frigid cold and everything was covered in snow. My grandparents had set up two cots for us to sleep in downstairs in my grandpas office. My cot was by the window. I can remember laying by that window tucked in a wool blanket by my gramma watching the cars drive up the road. They had storm windows over the regular windows and ice crystals had formed on them so as the cars slowly made their way up the road the ice crystals would be illuminated like a kalidascope. I would try to stay awake as long as I could! lol It was such a great memory for me because of the beauty but I felt so safe and loved. So.... that is what has been on my mind tonight :) ~~~shark~~~~~~~~ |
- suggestion made to me last night, about a positive approach to a situation i've been having with my daughter.. although things have gotten so much better since she's been back home, this suggestion actually really, really, REALLY worked and am so thankful for the eye opening! ♥ and i'm sure my daughter is as well.. =) |
I am wondering why people think that it is ok to want to be *in your space* and not bring anything positive to it? Is there not enough bad news, desperation and depression in the world without those around you bringing it to you as well? Do we not have a right to cut those out of our lives who do not have a positive influence? Is this not my life to pick and choose who I allow in it? We all have our issues and pasts but do they have to be relived on a daily basis? Is desperation attractive to anyone or on anyone? No. People say they want honesty but when you are honest and tell them what you see or how you feel it upsets them if it does not fit into what they want to hear. Just for the record this is not directed at anyone in particular just an over all thought I have been having.
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Remembering, reclaiming and rebuilding; My self esteem, my contentedness, my time, attention and focus, my home, my routine and my bank account.
I certainly didn't intend to sacrifice those things, but life happens and sometimes you don't realize until you look back, how much you've given up. |
Everything. I think a better question for me today is, what's not on your mind.
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I keep thinking how nice it is to flirt with someone and not have any strings attached ~ just the chance to have some good fun without being attached. Don't get Me wrong, relationships are nice and it feels good to have someone in your life but since age 19 I always seem to be in one and for now it just feels good to be able to be naughty and bad with no U-haul in sight ............ I'm finally being allowed to be Myself, and I don't want that to end anytime soon
That is exactly whats on My mind right now! |
Should I go to the gym now or wait until after work? If I wait until after work, will I actually go?
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ive spent years, making a plan...dwelling on the plan.. and saying i will action the plan, but i've procrastinated..
and then it hit me, i'm hurting no one but myself.. no one can make the changes for me, no one can force me to want this.. and i know, i WANT this.. so i'm bundling up my procrastinating ways and tossing it out the window - i'm forever encouraging people to go for the positives, but not following my own advice... time to live as i speak! |
An absolutely amazing weekend and how it passed way too fast...
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This weather is causing a sinus/migraine headache for me...............ugh!!!!
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that i have a few tasks this week.. one is to name something i like about myself each day for the next 2 weeks and the other is to pick one thing each day that i need to do, and follow through and complete it!
my appointment this morning was a bit hard, emotionally but, honestly did me a world of good as i am sitting and processing it all.. some things make much more sense.. will do me some good to do each of these things for the next 2 weeks, i really see some major growth in my future! =) |
Sitting with a friend and chatting about life and all of its surprises. She says "Love is insane...Just go with it. What you learn from one relationship will make you stronger for the next."
I am thinking that she is on to something :) |
The snow coming that is what is on my mind and how am I going to shovel it without help..UGH
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Talked to a very good friend on the phone earlier, but got sent signals that now have Me thinking that something else is up ~ we are gonna talk again tomorrow but until then, I'm left to try and decipher what it could mean
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I am thinking about the homeless people living in tents. I wonder if they are warm. If they ate the food I gave them. |
How I'm going to accomplish all this school work, and write a 50-page life experience portfolio, and study for a 3-hour SAT-like exam to earn credits in US History while working full-time. Selfish, but it's consuming me. :tiredcomputer:
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