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our trip to St Augustine this weekend...hoping that we ALL can have fun and enjoy ourselves without anyone issues.
that it is the last week of the period,and i am having to trust my ppl to keep numbers where they are supposed to be,so that just maybe i can make a bonus--which wouldnt really be an issue if all my ppl gave a damn instead of just feeling entitled making a mental note to bring my boyfriend his pop top thingies tomorrow---seems i have been forgetting them a lot lately and he expects them to be here on Friday when he walks by :) |
Sublime audacity
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On my mind..... tonight while catching up with my 'brother' of 35+ years made me sad... the group of us that hung together, since high school and for many years after.... some of us made it big, some of us went to prison, some of us are still the same, and some of us are still struggling, and runnin the streets chasing that god damned high. sigh. and then he told me that in the last 2 months- 5 of us have died from an overdose... and then he tells me that 8 days ago, 2 of my 'road dawgs' died together, from bad dope. so here I sit, grieving for friends that kept me sane, kept me smiling, kept me in some damn good trouble and kept me loved and safe from some really bad shit back in the day. I also sit here thinking how easily that could have, and very well might have been me. sitting here in shock, nothing to say that can fix it, my heart hurts for you, and I miss you guys. wherever you are, I know that y'all are kickin it and havin a blast! I pray that you've found peace finally, and that the chase for the ultimate high is sated. save me a seat, ok? RIP- know that you all were loved. (w) |
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Doctors have the results of the blood tests in now, they sent me a letter reminding me to make an appointment, so at least I know the results are nothing too scary. Just got to bite the bullet and make the appointment now ... At least it's one step closer to finding out wtf's wrong.
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The future and what it holds, good or bad
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How wonderful it is to be happy and feel so good all the time...no matter what has happened, at the end of my day I'm still just so very happy...and I like it!
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- that as much as i don't feel worthy, most days..
i really must have some feeling of worth, if i am willing to push myself to take the steps i have taken over the last few weeks, and get to where i am today.. and not only that, but setting goals to achieve over time, on this most awesomest "self" journey i've ever been on.. it's the first time i am feeling like i can do this, AND that i'm actually "DOING" this for myself.. i can't be 'that' bad, then.. and that in itself, is one heckuva feeling... |
seen this on a board at work, and really caught my eye... You start dying slowly if you do not travel, if you do not read, If you do not listen to the sounds of life, If you do not appreciate yourself. You start dying slowly When you kill your self-esteem; When you do not let others help you. You start dying slowly If you become a slave of your habits, Walking everyday on the same paths… If you do not change your routine, If you do not wear different colours Or you do not speak to those you don’t know. You start dying slowly If you avoid to feel passion And their turbulent emotions; Those which make your eyes glisten And your heart beat fast. You start dying slowly If you do not change your life when you are not satisfied with your job, or with your love, If you do not risk what is safe for the uncertain, If you do not go after a dream, If you do not allow yourself, At least once in your lifetime, To run away from sensible advice… Pablo Neruda, Medeiros |
Endings and new beginnings
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simplicity and how endearing it has become in my life...
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Being reminded by chatting with a new friend, that life is not about rushing its about savouring the moment and what life has to offer you ........... I often need to be reminded of this, so thank you to My friend for that wise piece of advice (f)
Don't rush, this is what is on My mind right now |
Ready for time to move a little faster!!!!! lol I can't help it...I miss hym!!!
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working on recognizing my strengths... a conversation with a really great friend last night, and him telling me that i need to trust my gut instincts more, that i am strong and able... i haven't felt like a strong person for many, many years.. so today, i set my mind to things i love about myself, which in turn helps me feel stronger within.. and i actually found some.. *smiling big* - i know that i am a good mother.. make that, a great & very loving mother.. - i am extremely loyal, authentic and honest, & cherish my friends & loved ones with all i am, and respect them, fully.. - i have the ability to cherish the small things in life, which in turn boosts my well being.. - i have & love my baby blue eyes, which i inherited from my Pepere (grandfather) - i am very creative, crafty, love making things & also do web graphics & have my own website & blog for digital scrapbooking, which i'm in the process of learning more of.. - i am very unique - and strive to be my own person, always.. - i am a good cook, have good survival skills & am a very laid back individual who loves to have fun (all with thanks to my father, the laid back, goofy outdoorsman).. i hope to build on my list over time , but the fact i found this much about myself that i love, is an awesome HUGE step forward for me! Super Dee Duper YAYness for meeee <3 |
Hoping that I passed my first anatomy test. I know for sure that I got one answer wrong, and there are 2 more that I'm afraid I got swapped around backwards because of the wording.
Also, I'm really wondering how this lab group is going to go, now that I'm stuck with the same partners. On the first day of lab I sat at a table with a cool hippy girl I'd spoken to once before. Two other folks came in late and sat with us, thus sealing our fate as a group. So now, this is what the group boils down to: - me - cool ass hippy girl who's smart as hell - teenage girl who never brings a single book to class and sits there popping her gum and twirling her hair, and always wants to be the first to look into the "telescope" (aka: microscope :|) - 40something Bo Bice look-alike that I'm positive even sweats reefer, who stares into space going "whoa...whoa". (I'm dying to know what he sees but I'm almost afraid to ask.) He does, however, bring his book but is never on the right page, and also can never seem to remember which degree program he is in. :| Hopefully things will go well, but I am worried about group projects. Smart hippy girl will definitely have her shit together, and eventhough I struggle with some of the material at least I work my ass off trying. I'm still confident though, and hope I do well in this class. :) |
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That i have to attend a meeting tomorrow morning at 8:30 which is 45 minutes away on my DAY OFF.
Pisses me off. They better have coffee is all i gotta say.:fastdraq: |
< --- needs help with the gallery, LOL...
ive finally figured out how to add a picture , i think! cept i added 2, which are almost identical, and no room for anymore pix than 2.. so i want to remove one - cept i cant figure out how to delete a picture, can anyone help? LOL i added the pix through the night and figured i was too tired to figure this out, now i've slept but i still can't figure it out hahahaha... THIS is on my mind! |
i bought a bunch of equipment to start another small bussness.. im just not sure how its all going to work as far as insurance, drivers, taxes.. the work is all there and waiting for me to put it in motion i just want to make sure everything is done right and to the book. plus im wondering if i should take a partner to help with the paper work and book keeping. i will be doing alot of running around setting up route checking and planning.
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