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-   -   The Loft: Butches and Femmes in their 40s, 50s and over. (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=317)

Daktari 02-28-2010 07:10 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoney (Post 58597)
soooo ........

here I am 46, happy as hell to be alive, just startin' to accept the fact that for the first time in my life I HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE FREE AND I just went through menapause ( and I love the feeling)...
then..
there is this young girl, 16 who ran away from home....she was being abused, no one wanted her......she spent Christmas with me and the fam and her mom just signed her off to me....don"t know me from shit, but is like.... here ya go...."you better put her on birth control... shes a little whore"....( um yeah... nice huh) so I became her guardian.

well so now after having an empty nest for like ...." two seconds" Im ... well raisin' another.

Now of course, 16 , you would think might not be too hard.... well the child has been through it, she has been abused for a long long time... she has issues... we get along great though, she loves it here her therapy is going well.

but now...

I dont know why Im tellin ya all this but I need someone my age to feel me....

Child protective services just t took my sons and gf parental rights, and I was made guardian now I also have a 1yr old and a 4 yr old.


Im 46 and I really had some pretty cool plans for my life now that it is the first time in 26 years I didnt have kids!.......

I love my grand children


But.......

FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!


GODDAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!^$#@%%&&^*&(*((*

F*CK F*CK F*CK


( I feel a little better now)


Stoney
So sorry to hear you're having a tough time of it right now Stoney. I have no idea what, if any, words of comfort can be said in such circumstances. Will your son and gf get their parental rights back in the near future?


Stoney 02-28-2010 08:01 AM
well , I doubt that,he has a drug problem....and well... I have raised my grand daughter for the better part of 4 years ne way... it is just damn it .. I wish they would get their shit together.. I dont foresee it...

casey35 02-28-2010 08:15 AM
stoney
 
i am so sorry that u have to put the empty nest on hold again. May u can find some couples that has the same age kids and be able to spend time with them and relax a bit and enjoy good company. There seems to be a few people in their forties that taking care of children.

DELSDAUGHTER 02-28-2010 08:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoney (Post 58597)
soooo ........

here I am 46, happy as hell to be alive, just startin' to accept the fact that for the first time in my life I HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE FREE AND I just went through menapause ( and I love the feeling)...
then..
there is this young girl, 16 who ran away from home....she was being abused, no one wanted her......she spent Christmas with me and the fam and her mom just signed her off to me....don"t know me from shit, but is like.... here ya go...."you better put her on birth control... shes a little whore"....( um yeah... nice huh) so I became her guardian.

well so now after having an empty nest for like ...." two seconds" Im ... well raisin' another.

Now of course, 16 , you would think might not be too hard.... well the child has been through it, she has been abused for a long long time... she has issues... we get along great though, she loves it here her therapy is going well.

but now...

I dont know why Im tellin ya all this but I need someone my age to feel me....

Child protective services just t took my sons and gf parental rights, and I was made guardian now I also have a 1yr old and a 4 yr old.


Im 46 and I really had some pretty cool plans for my life now that it is the first time in 26 years I didnt have kids!.......

I love my grand children


But.......

FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!


GODDAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!^$#@%%&&^*&(*((*

F*CK F*CK F*CK


( I feel a little better now)


Stoney
all i can say is WOW...i know kinda how you feel...i just got an empty nest and the pow......they are both coming back...and to make matters worse i just moved into a one bedroom apt....

morningstar55 02-28-2010 08:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DELSDAUGHTER (Post 58624)
all i can say is WOW...i know kinda how you feel...i just got an empty nest and the pow......they are both coming back...and to make matters worse i just moved into a one bedroom apt....
... crapola...

Daktari 02-28-2010 10:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoney (Post 58620)
well , I doubt that,he has a drug problem....and well... I have raised my grand daughter for the better part of 4 years ne way... it is just damn it .. I wish they would get their shit together.. I dont foresee it...
I am so sorry to hear of your son's addiction. I can't possibly understand what you're feeling/experiencing (I don't have kids) but my thoughts are with you.

LieslKate 02-28-2010 05:11 PM
This is gonna get a HUGE shriek of disapproval BUT... there is nothing in the Mom Handbook that says you have to take in grandkids or have adult children move home...

Do the grandkids have no other relatives? Where are the other grandparents, any other siblings or cousins age appropriate etc to take responsibility? Is this a matter of you being the only "unmarried" relative and therefore you are free and can take on this responsibilty? Why are you obligated to take them on? If the parents are drug addicts perhaps the kids would be best adopted...

As for adult children moving home... just say no, otherwise you are stuck with them 'til you go to the old age home...

Jet 02-28-2010 05:34 PM
Flying by to say hey... hope everyone is having a good w/e

Stoney 02-28-2010 05:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LieslKate (Post 58854)
This is gonna get a HUGE shriek of disapproval BUT... there is nothing in the Mom Handbook that says you have to take in grandkids or have adult children move home...

Do the grandkids have no other relatives? Where are the other grandparents, any other siblings or cousins age appropriate etc to take responsibility? Is this a matter of you being the only "unmarried" relative and therefore you are free and can take on this responsibilty? Why are you obligated to take them on? If the parents are drug addicts perhaps the kids would be best adopted...

As for adult children moving home... just say no, otherwise you are stuck with them 'til you go to the old age home...


well in my case, as i have mentioned I have already raised my g baby for 3 out of 4 years, yes My son is on drugs, so are millions of other people, I love my son with all my heart as I do these g-babies. He was my Baby. Now as a matter of fact I am the only relative around. but that would make no difference to me I would fight like hell for all of my G babies.
Sometimes, doing the responsible thing is giving your children to some one who loves them and will take good care of them while you get your shit together so you can be a parent in some capacity.

I am frustrated, I am disappointed, and a little relieved at the same time.
it isnt written in the handbook, I have to take them....no

but it is 100% in my heart......I love those babies , and could never stand them to be with strangers or in the system.

I have 5, 4yrs old and under..... I would take them all .


just been one crazy ass week



just had to scream for a second is all.


stoney

ruthie14 02-28-2010 05:53 PM
((((((((Stoney))))))) I hope everything works out. I would feel the same as you I think. I raised 2 stepkids who now have nothing to do with me... never could have any of my own. Long sad story...I won't get into it here. I just think that if I were in your position I would hope I would do the same. Good luck to ya hun.
Ruthie

morningstar55 02-28-2010 06:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoney (Post 58870)
well in my case, as i have mentioned I have already raised my g baby for 3 out of 4 years, yes My son is on drugs, so are millions of other people, I love my son with all my heart as I do these g-babies. He was my Baby. Now as a matter of fact I am the only relative around. but that would make no difference to me I would fight like hell for all of my G babies.
Sometimes, doing the responsible thing is giving your children to some one who loves them and will take good care of them while you get your shit together so you can be a parent in some capacity.

I am frustrated, I am disappointed, and a little relieved at the same time.
it isnt written in the handbook, I have to take them....no

but it is 100% in my heart......I love those babies , and could never stand them to be with strangers or in the system.

I have 5, 4yrs old and under..... I would take them all .


just been one crazy ass week



just had to scream for a second is all.


stoney


((((((((((((((((stoney))))))))))))))))
kudo's for you for following your heart..
blood is always thicker then water.... no matter what.:goodpost:
if it was my daughter in this situation... i would not or could not allow strangers to raise my grand kids..as in adoption or foster...
they are part of my blood.. and would do anything to be there foro them.

Julien 02-28-2010 06:41 PM
Hi my name is Graphiteta2s,
I wanted to introduce myself. I know you are discussing a very personal topic right now. I just wanted to step forward and wish Stoney the best. I'll step back now and keep reading.
G.

Jet 02-28-2010 06:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Graphiteta2s (Post 58895)
Hi my name is Graphiteta2s,
I wanted to introduce myself. I know you are discussing a very personal topic right now. I just wanted to step forward and wish Stoney the best. I'll step back now and keep reading.
G.
Welcome lofter.

Jet 02-28-2010 06:53 PM
Reading posts. tonight's fare...
tilapia rolled in bread crumbs and dill, browned in olive oil.
homemade tarter sauce.
BIG tossed salad

morningstar55 02-28-2010 07:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Graphiteta2s (Post 58895)
Hi my name is Graphiteta2s,
I wanted to introduce myself. I know you are discussing a very personal topic right now. I just wanted to step forward and wish Stoney the best. I'll step back now and keep reading.
G.
hey ya there..... Graphitsters... heh jump in anytime , ya know when ever i see your member name here.. makes me think of drawing.. lol
think its the artist in me .. thinking that way.. lol

morningstar55 02-28-2010 08:07 PM
alrighty Lofters...... i think im gonna take a nap before i head to the Nissian plant....... nites

Daktari 03-01-2010 05:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Graphiteta2s (Post 58895)
Hi my name is Graphiteta2s,
I wanted to introduce myself. I know you are discussing a very personal topic right now. I just wanted to step forward and wish Stoney the best. I'll step back now and keep reading.
G.
Welcome to the Loft Graphiteta ...great sig.

morningstar55 03-01-2010 11:25 AM
and afternooners...... its lunch time i suppose.... huh.. lol
i love steak salad's if they are made right....... heh
http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o...a37a57294e.jpg

ya know. OLJet.... I love that pic you there for your avatar... very handsome ;) :) dont ever change.
heyy Incubus....... hows ur day going over there??? what does your member name mean and how did it come about??
wonder where DELS daughter is this am ... hmmmm
mawning to you.... Graphite :) wait its afternoon ... Oyy
see what happens to my . when i drive till 3am ish and dont wake up till a later hour then normal ..mess's me up..lol

no1sBoi 03-01-2010 12:47 PM
I'm with you
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoney (Post 58870)
well in my case, as i have mentioned I have already raised my g baby for 3 out of 4 years, yes My son is on drugs, so are millions of other people, I love my son with all my heart as I do these g-babies. He was my Baby. Now as a matter of fact I am the only relative around. but that would make no difference to me I would fight like hell for all of my G babies.
Sometimes, doing the responsible thing is giving your children to some one who loves them and will take good care of them while you get your shit together so you can be a parent in some capacity.

I am frustrated, I am disappointed, and a little relieved at the same time.
it isnt written in the handbook, I have to take them....no

but it is 100% in my heart......I love those babies , and could never stand them to be with strangers or in the system.

I have 5, 4yrs old and under..... I would take them all


just been one crazy ass week



just had to scream for a second is all.


stoney
Stoney, I don't have kids or grandkids...but I've been a kid. I'm very old now, but still can't help believing that a committed, loving adult would have made a lot of difference back then. Beyond even that---ANYthing that is 100% in your heart will not dissipate. Follow your heart!

DELSDAUGHTER 03-01-2010 07:01 PM
well i am here MS...but i was late getting up this am ...so i had to scoot to work quickly........
just doing a drive by....tonight.....have a great night everyone


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