No whining! There's no crying in baseball.

On my mind as I sit watching the news and having my coffee...

the oil spill in Mayflower, Arkansas, near Little Rock. So sorry to hear about the damage to the environment and people's homes.

Feeling a little anxious right now...

Just got the call that I am no longer eligable for services through one of the three services that assisted me with my vision stuff while in school. I'm a success... and they want nothing more to do with me. J/k, they wished me well but they have to open the slot for someone new that is just starting on their journey to independence.

It's all good and I knew this was coming. All three services have closed my cases. It's just a little overwhelming to know my safety net of 7 years is no more.

Gonna go breathe now and appreciate that they all see me as a success story. :sigh:

Time Change...
 

The time change is killin me this year! I'm a fall back person, not a spring forward person! Why do we even have such a thing it makes no sense anymore! Maybe back in the old old days it was useful before there was electricity! I would like a vote on it to overturn spring forward!!

Wth did the post office do with my new phone. They say it was delivered Mon oh NO it wasn't. I want, need my phone now!!!

After almost non-stop work in recent weeks, I now have no scheduled hours until April 15th.

I'm having a hard time getting my mind and body out of work mode.

The duplicity of human nature...and why do people accuse you of the things they are doing...? We are a strange animal.....

How long it will take before I feel productive again?

Its like xmas eve for me tonight! Tomorrow my icky braces will be gone! And I can finally see what my new mouth really looks like. I'm so fucking happy over this! *happy dance*

If I start singing disney or musical songs , will I suddenly have friendly helpers to assist me with the things I can't take care of right now while I work on other things?

*Sigh* I didn't think so either but it is a nice thought.

Currently I am just daydreaming and slowly putting together business details and ideas.

What should I watch tonight? I need something to keep me distracted so I don't injure myself trying to work.

My right foot still hurts! Time for new work shoes:blueheels::blueheels:

Very very soon

Let's hope my productivity issue has been resolved *S

Because they are insecure or up to no good? I guess that is their conscience talking to you...
On the up swing, at least they have one.


I have been told that the green lollipop is quite valuable.
Grin

my poodle apparently overdid it playing with my mother's dogs....he is very sore and limping..sigh....

Sorry you are going through this. (Hugs)

The idiocy of the person I work for at job #2.

He allows our IT consultants, who get paid a gazillion dollars,to go waayyyyy over the deadline for delivering their product.

*EYEROLL*

But when it comes time to test said product, before taking it live and sending it out to our clients for use, he wants to rush through it in less than a day and doesn't understand how incredibly important it is to go through a methodical and thorough test process to ensure our clients are charged the appropriate amount and that it functions as it should.

All this rushing through, despite the fact that we had serious issues with payments, refunds and balances on student accounts last year, despite the fact that his program ran a deficit because of his inability to communicate and his refusal to pay attention to small details like COSTS, and despite the fact that the only thing that saved his ass was my meticulous record keeping and basic accounting skills that enabled me to unravel most of the mysteries. (Me - his long term temp getting paid less than the grad students he hires to do data entry)

His motto and method are to forge forward foolhardily and deal with fuckups later ... mainly because he doesn't actually have to handle the fall out.

:| :| :|

I require some :praying:

my love life ~

Lots *S I just can't put it into words right now , it is all glimpses and floating around.

See that! This pisses me off! You need to be the one in charge there.
The world is mad. Shakin my head. I was thinking about a woman coworker, yesterday, that used to work for me and with me. A really reliable, smart woman. amaizing she was! and she would do something great and i would give her the kudos etc. and thank her etc. and she would say to me out loud and proud and i just loved it...( this was after she had done something wonderfully intelligent)
" balls said the queen if i had em i'd be king! "
Matter of fact I posted a Janis Joplin song thinking about her...I will go post
what she used to sing with me.
Cause she knew her worth and value. You know?
And let me add this, she didn't say that phrase cause she wanted balls and to be king
Far from it. This woman considered men the lesser ( in inteligence) of the human species.

It would be in your companies best interest to fire that dude and give you his position. Sorry for the rant but that stuff pisses me off! People should be reimbursed for their work...not their gender.

I pray that upper management wakes up and manages to implement that change for you!

I am wondering how I can get to tag along with the crew from "american pickers" . That seriously looks awesome and up my alley. Unfortunately I don't have appraisal knowledge but I can apprecaite a good find! I can bargain too *S

I am thinking about tea! There are so many blends to try *sigh* Even looking at tea varieties helps to keep me calm. My teapot is eager for new steeping.

A very long to do list...

Jumping over hurdles...

Uncooperative kids...

On My Mind?
 

I work tonight, and what's on my mind is being single and trying to date while working at the gay bar. It's a pretty small town. There's a men's leather bar, a dance club gay bar full of straight people, and a small town gay bar place where lesbians actually go, and that's where I work. I get hit on at work all the time. I mean, the boys don't really hire lesbians, so I got hired because they thought I was a cute straight girl, I'm guessing. Haha, worked there for years and years and a lot of girls still don't know I'm gay.
I was seeing a FTM for a little while, and she told me her whole clique "knows better" than to hit on me because they all thought I was straight, and I'm like, if I'm straight, and you're a guy, why did it take you so long to hit on me?
Idk, it is kinda confusing. Because I am kinda straight for women. Mostly when I get hit on, it's straight curious girls or girly girls or that kind of undeclared midwestern kind of woman who wears her hair long in the back like she's fooling the rest of her roofing crew. It's very rarely an out lesbian with that gorgeous masculine presentation I can't get enough of.
Sometimes it feels like the butch/femme dynamic is very misunderstood in a small town. Although the lesbians I've known forever, the ones who were out before GSA's and anti-bullying legislation, those couples are very apparantly butch/femme. All the real couples, the happy couples. But every day I work I have to explain to a feminine woman that I'm gay, but that doesn't mean I want to sleep with every woman or that I don't have a style preference beyond "female."
And I get teased a lot, by the guys mostly. I mostly hang out with gay guys. And they tease me because I only date fire fighters, lumberjacks, and journeymen with tattoos and craftswomen on motorcycles and bad girl criminals who look like really rough dudes. I think it would appease their asthetics to put me next to another hot chick, maybe a blonde or an Asian, something that would look good next to an Irish redhead, and then everything would look like a party / porno, but I'm just not into it.
So the last time I went to work, a straight girl flashed me, and the time before that, an older woman with a neon yellow mullet told me she's been trying to find me (I mean, nothing else happened. She found me and then didn't ask me on a date or anything).
One time a butch fire fighter reached over me to change a keg, carried that heavy sucker out of my way, then apologized and said she was sure I could handle it. Why can't THAT happen every night?
It's a fine balance to flirt with everyone and sleep with no-one, and I'm realizing more and more that it's irresponsible and unprofessional to meet women at my job... at the only lesbian bar in town.
And that's what's on my mind.

Hang in there!

Little by little those to do lists will become accomplishments :)

I may need more tools.

I am also thinking that the wind is mighty bitter this evening!

The silence. The chill in the air.