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....reflecting on today.... being excited to have my monster back soon....and new yrs dates *smiles*
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Sometimes bad things just happen to us, no fault of our own...however, most times the things that go wrong in our lives have one common denominator...ourselves.
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One black spot in the rest of my amazing and wonderful Christmas Day...
... Its one thing to know and understand your parents dont and wont accept you... or support you for who you are... Its possible to look the other way as long as they do the same... ... however, it hurts... when they throw it back in your face... ... Talking to my mom today, about the idea of moving out of the country... and how difficult it is to get a work visa as a teacher in Canada... her response was, well marry some rich, kind man... that would make it simple... I said, actually mom, in Canada I can marry a woman if I want to... and she just right out says... "You need to marry a man." ... *blink* and the conversation ends there... This is nothing new... I have been out for a while now, I am not changing my mind, or going back in the closet for them... *sigh* but... maybe I do need to stop letting the intolerance slide... maybe I need to put down my foot and put up some barriers... I deserve to be loved by my "family" and if the one I was born with cant do that unconditionally... Maybe its time I concentrated on the one I'm building that does... |
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i'm sorry your family is throwing things in your face....my family tends to do the same....and you're right it hurts...and you shouldn't have to live with them making you feel less than they are...because of who you love...or how you live your life.....your friends...and the family we're building...love and support you...and no matter what...we'll stick together to make our dreams a reality.....we'll cut a path ... |
....cuddles....family...sales/wishlists and a savings account....
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OMG what the hell possessed me to go Boxing Day shopping?! I just stood in a 45 minute line at Banana Republic to buy 2 sweaters. I am at this exact moment sitting on the floor in a dressing room at a department store trying to get 5 minutes where someone's elbow isn't in my face. :\
Like shopping, hate crowds. |
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Anyhow, the standard line I am subjected to, be it a funeral, wedding or a run in at a grocery store is *Will you ever lead a normal life?* To which I reply *Tsk, Define Normal, like yours you mean?* Just once I'd love to be asked *How are you?* or *So, what are you doing now?* I found out long ago, life goes on...without them. |
evolution.....*smiles* ...... and as a sidenote...wondering how a couple of gifts can leave such a big mess.....holy wrapping batman
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allergies and sinus congestion is kicking my BUTT.
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It seems I was a little too optimistic and mistook their, what appeared to be ‘acceptance’ of my sexuality, when in fact it was their choosing to ignore (yet again!) the obvious truth about me and clinging on too school playground prejudices! I’m staying with them over Hogmanay in Scotland until the 2nd January….Oh the joy! |
I hope I can find an apartment that allows cats. I might get a cat, and name her Lucy.
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reading all the posts about families that refuse to except you as you are it makes me very sad ... Desd and I are both very lucky in that respect both sides of the family take us and love us as we are. We spent Christmas with her folks and they treat me as if I was one of their own and they love my daughter. My dad and Jen love Desd and are coming for the wedding from AZ. It never made a bit if difference to Dad that I was gay he takes me and loves me just as I am and her adores his granddaughter and make no mistake she is his even if my EX is her Bio mom Goose is still his granddaughter and he would fight anyone who said different:cigar2:
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Very sad today. Can't stop thinking about the fact that I got laid off from my job and now I once again have to enter the job search. I really loved what I did, and the company I did it for. It makes me sad that a previous CEO walked away with millions and screwed the rest of us.
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My cousin is protective of me….I’m like the little sister he never had and he is like another older brother (in no way does he replace my late twin brother). I was living in Scotland trying to spend time with my family; only, I constantly kept getting why wasn’t I married to a MAN and the various other comments. I was offered a job in London, again and took it! Nope! That didn’t go down well at the time, but, I said it was a promotion of sorts (it wasn’t an untruth, lol!). I accept that my Scottish side of the family will most likely never accept that I’m gay and that is OK! ….even though it hurts. I see them once a year, less when living over seas and we email and chat on the phone. |
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Take me as I am...or don't. I no longer explain myself to anybody. I DON"T care what they think. It's my life, and I will live it my way. Yet, when I am thrown onto the mix of the *family* I stand around and make a mental inventory of those who judge me. Let see, the laundry list goes like this. You stole from your employer, you have been married 4 times, you over eat and over drink, You used to do drugs, Wonder if you still do. Every time I see you, you have a different car and its always wrecked. Why is that? You cuss too much. You need to go to charm school. Another Boyfriend? But still not married what is that, 6 kids now? blah blah blah...so really Do you think I care what they think? |
What's on my mind? So much stuff that I don't know if I can multitask today. :thud:
Maybe I should make a list to organize it by importance and relevance.then I can concentrate on the things that I need to concentrate on and file the other stuff in the compartments in my mind:glasses::deepthoughts: Easier said thank done :writer::scared: |
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We each live our lives as we feel is right and I realise that I am fortunate to still have the support of my family. |
Breakfast, and how absolutely delicious is going to be.
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it is a family affair!!!
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Tomorrow closes a HUGE chapter in my life. It is very bittersweet, but I am finally living my life how I want, and I am happy. I will always cherish the past, but I am SO excited about the possibilities of my future.
Smiles and Hugs Starry |
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