Feeling
 

Feeling very sad. My brother called me and told me he had to have his dog put down today. Very old, sweet, loveable dog but going blind, falling off ramp he built cause the poor thing would not walk steps. Today he was bleeding from his nose and my brother thinks he must have banged his head or nose so he found it had but it had to be done. I loved that dog myself as he was nice to everyone. I feel for my brother as I know it is the hardest thing he as had to do in a long time. Damn ageing anyway.

Feeling excited....
 

Today I am above water finally
Less than two weeks ago within a matter of days, I had an accident in our new car, I got laid off from my job unexpectedly, and my dog couldn’t walk and was in incredible pain, and I was terrified because of my job loss. I couldn’t afford to take care of her and was afraid I was going to have to euthanize her.

However, and I have since gotten on unemployment. I worked out if payment plan with our veterinarian, who never ever allows this! And the insurance covered everything and incredibly, we didn’t have a deductible!

I am feeling relief, happiness, gratitude, and hope.

Graduation Day :)
 

I accomplished my 9 weeks (3 times a week) of physical therapy goal for a *frozen shoulder* which was a result of my torn rotator cuff injury in April.

I have and will continue to avoid surgery to repair the tear. The tear will never *heal* on its own, but I can prevent further damage. The consequence of my April incident which led to the frozen shoulder incident are reminders to stay active and mobile.

I admit I am stubborn and not the most compliant with restrictions: however Mr. Brett J. who was my therapist/coach/cheerleader and my favorite motivational quote to me was: *Motion Is Lotion* :cheer:

Ks- :thumbsup:

Well… I’m okay. Not feeling exactly good but not exactly bad — either. I don’t have an appetite really, but I force myself to graze on veggies and such.

Not sure when I will feel better, but I’m glad I’m still here.

Kinda sad and blue. I had an appointment with my pill doc today, and it was distressing to recount all the sad stuff that's happened since the last time I saw him. He upped one of my scripts by an extra half dose; we'll see if that does any good.

Later, I sang along to my "sad songs" playlist. That helped a little.

Sorta kinda better. I've been doing stuff today, as opposed to just lying in bed and thinking about how bad I feel. I guess that's an improvement, at least psychiatrists seem to think so. One of the things I did was bake brownies - does that really count as "doing something" though, when I know I will just eat them to comfort myself? As it turns out, I only had two - and I enjoyed them, I didn't just gobble the whole pan down in sadness.

I also played with the dog, which I'm sure she appreciated since I have mostly ignored her for several days. I made sure she had plenty of toys, but of course that's not the same as playing with me. Honestly, if I'm asleep or dozing in bed, she usually just gets in her crate and sleeps.

I did some arts and crafty stuff, too. That's definitely an improvement, as I haven't felt creative at all lately. I couldn't even come up with an idea before. Today an idea finally came to me and I started it.

So yes, "sorta kinda better" describes well how I'm feeling.

I am feeling all sorts of ways

I sprained my ankle yesterday. And it might be broken. I had gone to urgent care and they did an x-ray. They said that they couldn’t see a definite break. They wanted me to follow up with my orthopedic surgeon because it seems like more than a sprain. So… I’m in pain and I hurt. And I’m worried that I’ll get laid up again.

I feel relief, because finally after over three weeks and many attempts to correct an initial mistake, I made, while filing for unemployment, I got my first deposit.
But I’m feeling frustrated because I can’t access it. I had to close down my debit card because I lost it!

And I’m also feeling kind of lost. I’ve been laid off from the job that I felt was the best job I ever held, and I am kind of bored and feeling like I have no purpose. I don’t mean that in a low self-esteem kind of way. I mean that in a way that expresses that all my life I have served populations that were at risk and needy, empowering them to get strong and independent. I want to continue doing that, but I just don’t know in what direction or capacity or what population I will do it next.

I’ve had several interviews, all of them wonderful opportunities. But I am 66 years old and I don’t want to work full-time. I am retired. I am doing this to fill my need to serve. And I don’t want to be a Director or a supervisor or a manager… Which is where the interviews always go! I want to work in the trenches with the people.
I have a job interview on Monday. And another one on Wednesday of next week.

My tooth hurts and I have a headache. Motrin helps, but doesn't really work. I really want a BC powder and a Coke, my go-to for headaches, but I'm not supposed to have either one with this kidney problem I'm having. So I am Crabby!

I hired a dog walker today. The boy is going to a convention, and I am just not capable of walking Brittany three times a day. I'm not even capable of going up and down the stairs three times in a day, without having to spend the whole next day in bed. So I made an agreement with a neighbor that I found on Facebook. She's supposed to come over and meet Brittany and the boy on Thursday. I'm feeling conflicted and full of trepidation, but we'll see how it goes.

Excited!

Massachusetts passed a bill that will allow me to go back to nursing school for free! I’m finally doing this!

How are you Feeling?
 

Feeling better. Talked to my brother and he is getting it together after his loss, I myself have joined two more chat rooms and I am as busy as a 6 tailed cat in a room full of rockers but happy doing it anyway. This evening is so quiet and still compared to all the heavy rain storms earlier. I just heard the train go over the overpass near where I live and it reminded me of being a child growing up around trains. Yes, feeling much better.

Pretty good! As far as my tooth goes, it still kinda hurts, but I have meds for that now. The antibiotics seem to be working.

But the best news is that my Mom will be moving back from the hospital into her nursing home tomorrow! They say they have her meds straightened out. Hopefully she will enjoy her life more now. Also hopefully, she will not be throwing any more remotes at people's heads.

Pretty pissed off! Planned on fixing part of Thanksgiving meal tonight. 4 pm power went out expects to be back on by 8:15. I know yall think I'm crazy but my bed time is 9. LOL yeah Ima old man now, go to bed with the chickens

Not as good as earlier. My tooth is driving me nuts, and I can't get any sleep. Lying down puts pressure on it, no matter what position I lie in. Even soaking it in whiskey is not helping much. I made a new bite guard today, thinking that might put less pressure on it, but that didn't work. On the other hand, if I sleep without a bite guard, I just grind my teeth all night and wake up with a toothache and a headache. Aaarrgh!

Sad and tired and overwhelmed.

My mother passed away about 10 days ago. It was completely unexpected. I thought she was getting better, but she continued to deteriorate until she just didn't eat or drink for five days. My sister kept this information to herself, so I didn't get to go see my Mama before she died. By the time my sister came clean, Mama had only hours left. She passed away before I could jump in my car and make it all the way to her nursing home. I missed her by about an hour.

Then I somehow got a kidney infection within days and ended up hallucinating in the ER again. Actually, the doctors aren't sure it was an infection, that was just their best guess. I was in the hospital for a week, but now I'm home again.

I'm too tired to do anything but lie in bed.

On guard. Listening intently. Heightened focus.

Feeling
 

Does not affect me diretly but I am happy for all the gay/lesbians out there that are Catholic as the Pope just gave his blessings to all marriages. I know this is important to lots of folks.

Trepidatious….

I accepted a position in an urgent care. The staff openly say that management is inept and they run short on staff on the regular. This was highlighted by the fact that I was supposed to be “shadowing” on my very first day, but ended up answering the phone and helping the other MA as she was completely on her own.

What have I gotten myself into 😳