What we had talked about previously was the idea of giving people who had challenging life events grace regarding the naughty list. Having to go care for seriously ill parents (nanners) or spouse (otter) is simply not the same thing as saying it was lost in the mail, then refusing to provide the tracking number (CCB). I asked for CCB to provide a tracking number to prove that it was actually mailed. No such number was provided and she ignored my message asking for it.

Two of those people had circumstances beyond their control, and one of those people did not, or if she did she didn't say anything about it.
I would say that nanners and otter shouldn't be on the naughty list regardless, and CCB can get herself off of it by completing and mailing her projects, or at the very least providing proof that she mailed something to my address when she said she did.

Hi Nina, CCB has been in this group for 20 years and several of us know her very well in person. She is a close in person friend of mine and an artist. She does not lie. She doesn’t go on the site every day and when she went on the site and saw your message she was about to send the tracking number but then saw that you had written that post. The reason that we came up with this rule years ago is because we had various stories from people about why they didn’t get it done, and the rule takes away judging who has a sad enough story and whose story is not worthy or not true. It made it very easy for us, and it really improved how many people completed each project! If your project doesn’t come in time, then you’re out for six months. Possibly a solution would be to change the rule to three months if it feels too harsh but I think we need an objective rule. If you don’t turn it in you don’t turn it in and you’re on the list!

Normally, we do not send the cards if someone has not turned in their project. Their cards go back to them and they can send them out individually if they want but anyone who does not turn it in before the end of the one week grace period does go on the list. We do not ask for proof of family illness etc. It keeps things consistent and has really improved follow through over the years.

All I said was that she can send the tracking number and I would consider that the same as any other situation beyond her control. I didn't say that she lied, only that I asked for tracking twice and never received it.
This is turning into an argument when it doesn't need to be. If you need people to go on a time out list, then so be it. I thought Clay said it was three months not six.

Hi Nina,

My apologies if I came on strong. I know you have wonderful intentions but what we were finding is that when we excused people and just made the projects donation to them if they told us a life crisis was going on and that they were not going to send out their cards is that often the same people had that happen pretty regularly. Therefore, it felt uncomfortable to be working hard on projects and receiving minimal return. It really is not a punishment. Like we have written in the past: “artists on hold.” We do understand things happen, which is why we came up with the one week grace period which felt reasonable.


Here is the rule (using this project as an example). We were all used to it so we stopped explicitly posting it but we do have new members join which is wonderful and we really should go back to posting it with each project so it’s not confusing for people.

Also to add, if we want to consider amending the rule for the future to be three months instead of six months then that’s OK with me as long as it’s applied to everyone and does not involve evaluating individual circumstances, since we really do not know what is true or untrue, and some people also do not care to share their personal business, and should not be penalized for that. If a project does not arrive within a week of the due date then that person is on hold for the amount of time stated, in the rule and their projects are sent back to the participants who made them - period. For FUTURE projects do people want to keep it at six months or consider changing it to three or four months? Thoughts from group members?

My own thought is that six months feels a little long, but three months feels a little short. 4 months??

Why don’t we start fresh with the next project and take a deep breath and let everything go! No one on the “on hold” list and just start from scratch
and attach the rule at the end of the next project. I am sorry for my role in everything. This group is one of the most meaningful aspects of my adult life where I so rarely make time for anything personal and creative. Lots of love to you all!

Also, one of our members who had nothing to do with this project contacted me and requested that we not call it the time out list or the naughty list. Even though that is sometimes said playfully it was also starting to feel quite uncomfortable to me as well. Let’s stick with artists on hold and let’s also remember that even if someone is on hold from participating in projects, they are still welcome to chat with us on the thread! Life happens, and I’m sure we will all be on hold at some point if we haven’t already, but that doesn’t mean we are not still an important part of the group!

This is true, it does make it easier for all of us when we don't have to decide who has a more worthy excuse.

For my part, I am in favor of the rule. I think 4 months would be adequate, but if everyone wants to stick with 6 I am fine with that. As nycfem said, we have had much better follow-through from people who sign up since we started the rule (myself included). I don't like getting back projects that I made for someone else. I do remember at least one time when we sent somebody on the on-hold list their projects anyway, as a kindness, for what that is worth.

I'm not wanting to stir up any trouble here, just throwing in my .02. We have a great group, I love working on projects with you all and seeing your efforts. Let's all agree on something, even if that means rewriting the rule, and keep the good crafty vibes going.

My projects are done and I’m addressing the envelopes today. They’ll be in the mail to each of you on Monday. Let me know if you’d like the tracking number, but I’ll be checking them.

my 2cents......
 

Totally understand and really hope you feel better!

Omg I’d LOVE twinchies with the option choice for inchies! Count me in!

What is a twinchie? I'd offered to wrangle, but my work life is exploding so if you can do it nanners, I'd be very grateful. (My boss died this summer, and now I need to figure out what I'm doing next, so it's a bit hectic.)