***i WILL be at the reunion 2013 next year!

Thinking about how sometimes what we need to do and should do is not always what we want to do...interesting how we conflict ourselves sometimes

this is just one of those days where i really just need to keep things simple or i may very well rip somebody's head off their shoulders and sh*t right down their neck.... off to bed i go.

***just means that you have a forever fine... you can either pay it... or don't drive in Colorado... OR next time you get a letter~don't open it... instead cross out your name and put "no such person at this address return to sender" and put it back in the mail.

this happened to me before for a stupid fine i got in NJ...

why is it i'm always on the wrong train?
 

We are in Phoenix.

Our last flight has been delayed 45 min so far.

Yes, my $.50 toll turned into $47.00. It's all good and I am not a fugitive. Yay! Which is good because I plan on going back to Estes Park at some point in my life :-)

Reunion memories. All the great people of the Planet! :)

My head hurts. I'm nauseous.

I have a ton of homework.

I've not been this unhappy in over 3 years. I was hoping she would be right, but I didn't wake up feeling any different. I hope she rested.

Hiding sounds good.

Contemplating if I wouldn't be better off selling my place and moving then none of my exes could find me.

im thinking the the extreem humid weather has finally gone!! time to start ridding again before winter hits.
trying to make my plans for the holidays.. little confusing right now

how good it feels ... happy and relieved ... to purge so much stuff that i hadn't touched in a year.. to see BUNCHES of empty boxes (some I reused for kitchen glass stuff)... how good it feels to see clean, uncluttered floor in my spare room...to feel those "ugly feelings of memory boxes" get released as I process them and dispose of them as I purge the physical clutter and mental clutter.. how I know when I get set up in my next place that unpacking will be less work/less clutter because of all the work I've done now... how good it feels to be ready to make changes in how I keep things in the future (like be more organized with my papers and important things, rather than letting it build up)... how good it feels to NOT live in a house like my mother kept (where the kitchen was so awful that you couldn't get to the appliances or sink because of all the trash)..my house might be cluttered on times, but never the stressful mountains of trash my mother couldn't let go of..

right now, the amount of work I need to do is stressful and the level of pain in overwhelming ... but I am making progress ...

I've used this as a self discovery time.. a place of bad mental space to transitioning to positive decision to make changes ...

... Now.. I am ready for a walk in the apple orchard and then next spring in the cherry tree groves in D.C.

Falling asleep alone.
Not wanting to be alone
Needing something so badly that's out of reach currently
Trying to be as understanding as I can
Knowing life happens
Waiting for my life to ge back on track
Damn a lot on my mind lol