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My meds are messed up. I'm not feeling right. I'm having troubles in almost every aspect of my life. As I struggle, I keep thinking it has to get better. I finally got my meds straightened out today. It will take the rest of the week for levels to get up to where they belong. It was a rough couple of weeks. And clinics aren't the best places to go. With my regular dose back and in effect, I will stop hearing voices which will be wonderful. I have been plagued by them ever since I went down to a lower dose. My friends have been detrimental to me through this. They have been there and have listened to me and let me cry and let me do whatever I needed to do.
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Things are getting back to normal. The depression is there somewhat but everything else is doing well......even the anxiety, which is a surpirse.....a pleasant one, but a surprise non the less. I think what I'm really struggling with is feeling worth the effort. I have to remember that my friends wouldn't be there, if I weren't worth the effort. It's just hard to feel and know that deep within....it is for me anyway...
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I have been doing a lot of research recently regarding mental illness, causes, treatments etc. because my youngest son has just returned from the far east as hes been suffering more and more over the last 2 or 3 yrs with hearing voices, really bad ocd's and delusions - you can have a perfectly normal conversation with him but then he gets a panic because the voices and resulting ocd's occur, its day and night - resulting in our bathroom bring permenantly flooded as he throws water over himself - and a lot of worry and anxiety on our part. in England they are loathe to give a diagnosis and put labels on anyone with these kinds of symptoms but we all know what they mean and people are usually heavily drugged, so much so they cant enjoy life. My son has been teaching english and music and is a jazz musician, has a lot of interests and things he wants to do, so too many drugs are not the answer for him.
SO............i googled a Dr Hoffer - when alive (died of old age) he promoted orthomolecular health, good diet, vitamins and minerals in high doses, and particularly Niacin, Vitamin B3 which i am buying for my son. I have hi blood pressure and colestorol which isnt due to smoking nor diet so as i dont like taking pills, ive discovered that Niacin also lowers both of these, so we are both going to give them a go........... just thought that may be of interest to anyone with a mental health problem. Niacin is supposed to improve dramatically any condition such as bipolar, depression etc. |
Collided!
My depression and PTSD collided in a very bad dream last night/early this morning. I woke up crying. Hard weeping, not just a few tears. As usual with such dreams, my family of origin was in it. Every time I dream about them, I have a rough time when I awaken. I have to work diligently not to let depression overtake me. I see my therapist today. I think that my topic should be my childhood, as I've been having many dreams lately w/my "beloved" mother in them, she from whom most of my PTSD stems. Anyone else have trouble with THEIR mother growing up or even now? I would be having trouble now, except that she tragically-and I do mean that-died in Katrina. In the daytime I believe that that I have forgiven her and wish her well bu my dreams belie this.
Lady_Wu (w) |
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As far as suppliments go, I have an ex who tried to go all natural. It was a total disaster....and was very hard on me. That doesn't mean it won't work for you....but she tried this program called True Hope and it was just horrid. I have heard that fish oil is good too. And Amino acids.....you might want to give those a try. |
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I used to have terrible dreams like that. It's been years since I have had any like that. Do you find it helps to talk about them? That's what made my dreams stop being unpleasant. My mother died while I was growing up and that was a hard thing for me. I know a part of my illness is due to that. I certainly hope you can work through this stuff and have good dreams again. I know what it's like to be afriad to go to sleep cuz the dreams are that unpleasant. Take care, Jedi |
I have trouble with bipolar disorder and getting out of the house. It seems like I like staying inside in the comfort of my home but I get bored sometimes too. I guess that I just need to get out more even if it means getting out of my comfort zone!!
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please allow me to blahhhhh....
well i did get an appointment with the counceling and med center around here... unfortunately it takes a month so the appointment isn't til July 23rd... but man oh man am i having some issues...
for one... why do so many people think the meds and therapy are the end all cure all.... sometimes you are who you are to the core... and don't they realize that some of us think..... well lets face it.. we sure as hell don't think like most people... and yes meds may help alter that some... and even therapy may have some options... but if its truly a part of who you are... and if you have accepted that... they can't deal with you... because hell... i know i struggle with in myself... i know i'm a bitch to deal with even ON meds.... but in my heart... to my core... i am a devoted.. caring... loving... and understanding woman... but there's alot of shit to go through to get to that point... and most can't deal with that.... because even medicated... you have your good days... and your bad... and sometimes those can turn into weeks.... *sighs*... i'm so frustrated and wondering.... why the hell am i doing this... why am i going through all this struggle muck and shit... to still be alone???? to still not have someone tolerate me... and help me through some of these... episodes... god i'm like so messed up... and i know i'm doin this for me also... because i know i needed some changes myself.... but when is enough enough... thanks for letting me.... let go of some of this crap in my head... peace... |
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Just here to check in. Hope everyone is good. Things are going well for me. I am feeling stable and happy. I am doing really well at work...in fact, I just got promoted. The only thing that sucks is that I was just denied medicaid...after waiting for almost a year on a response. I am reapplying and I am hoping for a better outcome this time.
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being denied medicaid
sorry to hear that Chef
but good thing that you are reapplying. take care and DON"T give up |
I got approved again for My disability, and its good until 2012 so now I can go to school this fall and be okay :)
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Im new to this thread but I have a depression problem though its not bad, I still struggle with not wanting to get out of bed and such but I am doing pretty good.
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Thanks bud, everything seems to be falling into place so I'm glad for that :D |
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