YES! GOD, YES!

That is perhaps the most brilliant thing I have read in a good long while!

wow
 

Hello Everyone

This an amazing thread! So wonderful hearing about all you wonderful women.

I have always found it difficult to describe myself. Some of the things you've said I can relate too. I'll have a go myself once I can get pen in hand and space in my head to think about who I am :-)

Thank you ladies

Flower :bunchflowers:

I love this thread and all of the powerful words I've read here. It's one that's made me think, "Who am I?" And I love it when my brain is asked to think. ...

I'm a queer, quirky, recovering academic femme who finds solace in books and theory more so than in the arms of butches who are too quick to be careless with my heart.

I'm a fiercely unapologetic feminist, recovering activist, semi-vegetarian, bike-riding pinko femme who prefers pretty dresses and knee-high boots as cycling wear over lycra and spandex.

I'm a femme who loves fiercely, deeply, thoroughly, and strongly. This quote from Dorothy Allison is my love warrior's call to arms:

“Don’t come at me with that sour-cream smile. Come at me as if I were worth your life—the life we make together. Take me like a turtle whose shell must be cracked, whose heart is ice, who needs your heat. Love me like a warrior, sweat up to your earlobes and all your hope between your teeth. Love me so I know I am at least as important as anythingyou have ever wanted.”

I'm a consciousness-raising, hell-raising, hair-raising femme who is a study in contrasts. I am at once bold and brash while being doubtful and insecure. I will love you in one minute and want to run from you in the next unless you hold on tight and make me feel safe, warm, cherished, and wanted.

In short, I'm the only femme I know how to be - unapologetically me.

I am a girly girl and love most things that make me feel pretty. Dresses, jewelry, long hair but only some makeup. I am average girl, short and average weight. I don’t worry much about gaining or losing weight. I do exercise at least four times a week and prefer to do outside things like the track instead of going to a fitness center.

I am someone who always has my cell phone with me and will text back almost right away day and night.

I enjoy talking and believe it or not even though I am a talker I am also a good listener. I may not answer the question right away but will think about it and then answer it. I am someone who is very busy with work, volunteering and kids but somehow feel alone a lot. Most consider me a little hmmn nutty but a lot of fun. I am drawn to people who may seem very different than most but I seem to understand them.

When I love I do with my whole heart. When I am upset I tend to see the worst cinereo and run from things to stop from getting hurt. I love music and new things to do. I have no problem just packing a bag and taking off for a day or even a weekend with maybe no idea where we are going.

Ive Been called a HIGH Femme
 

sometime i think i am...

I love doing my own nails as much as having them done in the shop, i love the way i feel spoiled when i can go to the shop and have them done.I love them long and I love that they are mine.

I despise shopping just to shop i need a purpose. I have my girly stuff all over the top of my dresser and i am just fine with that, it is where i do my makeup and hair every morning. That is my space just for me.

I love tanning and how my skin loves the sun..

I despise bugs in every form, i love camping please dont remind me there are bugs and we will get along just fine, i can put up a tent cook, not worry about showers etc.

I have tools and know how to use them...id prefer to not break a nail using them so if i don't have to i wont.

i once called my son in law to come change my tire on a dark road , he did then when he was done he reminded me that i had AAA, i reminded him that this is what he was here for ...to change my tire besides he reached me a lot faster than AAA would have.

Im the woman in red, im the girl next door, im somewhere in the middle..Im that kind of girl.

I like road trips where i don't have to drive however am willing to share if the road trip is a long one.

I like books and movies and superb conversation...I like to talk, I like to share, I like listening and learning as well.

I love the ocean, the mountains and everything in between.

Im the girl one can take home to "momma" as well as the other girl lol

Im the girl that can pull off business suits and mini skirts all in the same week.

Im the kind of girl who believes in dressing properly for the occasion even if you are only going to the grocery store.

Just an interesting thought/observation I made today...
 

I noticed that my ex and I actually wear quite similar styled clothes sometimes (jeans and a V neck sweater), yet on her they look butch and on me they look femme.

I guess it does help that she wears her version on the baggier side, where as I wear mine on the tighter side. Still essentially the same outfit, with a totally different look.

So my conclusion was, that it is not just the type of clothes, but how you wear them and how you hold yourself in them.

I am a femme through and through.

It's hard to say what makes me femme. I wonder just how femme I am sometimes. There are so many possible things that can make me femme but don't those things also make me a woman?
I can make a house a home. I can sew a dress. I can plan and make a dinner for 20. I am womanly. Probably the most important womanly thing I do is change those around me by listening and bearing witness to life. Does that make me femme? Not really. That skill is because I'm priestess.
I love to wear heels with dark red polish peaking out of the open-toed shoes. Gold polish works as well. I love to make a big, wonderful meal for my lover and feel her gush with appreciation and joy. Does that make me a femme? I wear skirts and dresses, smell like roses, am the one lost kids are drawn to when they want to be found and my children trust me enough to reveal all their secrets to me. That makes me a mother.
I love women. I love supporting and loving all women. Without my sisters growing up, I'd be dead or broken. My eldest sister taught me to love with an open mind and free spirit. The women in my life have made me whole. I'm proud to be a woman and love to be in my skin. I dance and am part of a local group of sisters who dance. This doesn't really make me femme but....it's close.
When I see butch or masculine women, the part of me that loves women burst out with squealing desire and sighs. I am femme because I love butch women. I love the swagger, the muscled arms, the roughened hands. I love the patchwork of tanned skin, the quick wit and charm, the clever quips. I love the bold style, the vibrant living, the proud, strident walk.
The sight of butch women makes me arch my back and watch with heady anticipation. I will inhale deeper and watch their every move. I'll adjust my skirt so I'm as appealing to the eye as possible. Sometimes I'll touch my neck unconsciously as I undress them with my mind. The sight of butch women makes me swoon and suddenly feel intoxicated with desire. I will sit, stand, pivot, walk or dance differently. I will emote differently. I will speak differently. I will flow into my most comfortable state of being. This is what makes me a femme. I am femme because I love butch women.

I'm this kind of femme:

Lipstick and flats. Leaving powder on your collar. Bookish and introverted. Wouldn't know what to do at a nail salon, but knows my way around Sephora/a makeup counter. Jeans and sweaters most of the time, but who loves to get dressed up for a special event (or just a nice dinner). Nappy headed, dreadlocked womanist with trust issues who loves deeply and fiercely. Always puts a camera in your face, because butches are beautiful, and you're the most beautiful of all. Wounded, but ready to love again. Hopeful. Funny. Fiercely loyal.

whoops, posted earlier

I am the femme that is a port in the storm for the butch that has the courage to go out into an unaccepting, unforgiving world to be exactly who and what they are

I am the femme that is the keeper of butch secrets

I am the femme in whose lap lays a butch who needs solace but will never tell another living soul about that need

The butch card will never be revoked by me.

I am strong and at times, weak; brave and at times, fearful; courageous and at times-not-so-much

I am an every-woman and at the same time, uniquely me

I am femme

I'm too sexy for my self!

I discovered velcro rollers (reminds me of sponge curlers way back when)
I love what they do for my hair, and no more heat treatment. :|

I know who I am not....which is more poignant at the moment and of course leads to self knowledge.

I am not that femme who can be with someone who says "I can be butch".

I am not that femme who can be with someone who says "I can do that for awhile until we figure out why you are like you are".