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"I'm trying to see things from his point of view, but I can't stick my head up my ass that far."
"A few more brain cells and he might be dangerous. " " Don't go away mad, just go away ." |
Fashion 'statements'...
"Poor dear, she went hunting for fashion, and didn't shoot a thing."
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" Well suicide is always an option."
" Life is difficult, it's even more difficult when you're stupid." "Don't worry, only the good die young, you have another 100 yrs or so. " |
"She's the type who'd kill her own parents , then plead for mercy because she's an orphan."
" The #1 leading cause of divorce is marriage." |
I like it
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Quote:
Who pissed in your Post Toasties this morning? |
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
Don’t be humble. You’re not that great. If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out. Someone who thinks logically, provides a nice contrast to the real world. Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm. I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable. |
I would love to have a battle of wit's with you but I can clearly see you are unarmed.
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Sarcasm! Almost as much fun as Orgasm but you leave your clothes on...
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Therapy helps, but screaming obscenities is cheaper.
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A Butch is as young as the woman she’s holding!
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you. I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. |
Sometimes I need what only you can provide, ABSENCE
I'm smiling, that SHOULD scare you Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm I'm not a complete idiot, somethings are missing Pitty party for 1 today? |
"Once I was...
...pure as the driven snow - now I'm just driven."
~May West |
If you're that A-hole that honks the second the light turns green, I'm that shit head that will sit through that green light & update my Facebook status.
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I'm currently taking applications for an evil sidekick. Must be willing to follow directions and occasionally participate in witty banter.
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On the advice of my attorney, I plead the 5th on EXACTLY what I did for a Klondike Bar.
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I'm fully qualified to not care
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Some days there are just not enough swear words in my vocabulary!!!
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Sometimes you just want to ask people if they own a mirror!
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never argue with an idiot they drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.
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