that awkward moment in high school when you realize while getting your neck rubbed by the girl behind you on the bus that if you were a dude you would have a boner to be proud of... :ymca:

Oh so awkward....
 

I was at a favorite local discount retailer yesterday morning....I went in for paint supplies....but meandered to the perfume and make up area....I saw a scent that I thought may be nice...a ginger something...so I found an already open container of lotion...and without really paying attention, opened it for a sniff...

Wellllllll......................

The lotion, as it turns out...was very....liquidy...and since I was not paying attention...about a 1/2 cup of it ended up ALL OVER the front of my sweatshirt....I got a GOOD whiff of it then......:blink:

I had to go to a far far corner of the store to turn my sweatshirt inside out...but fortunately, the store was nearly empty...I can only IMAGINE how that would look to others....with a glob of drippy lotion dripping down my chest... :blink:

An awkward moment...
 

Oh Cinn!!!! (((Hugs))) I am so sorry! I am sure I would have done something like that, had I felt the way I did when I woke up.

That awkward moment when you are politely excusing yourself from the table to get back to work and your bag gets caught on the chair and you get tripped up by the metal table leg.

Awkward
 

When your buddy needs to take a nap before bowling. This is guy younger than me. (lol)

snakes under your desk, my ass, Mr. Hewett.
 

That annoyingly awkward moment when the state senator you've hosted at events as part of your "respected" panel of speakers on community issues makes the national news for being a pervert and an anti-feminist asshole.

When you have company over and you forget in your attempt to clean to put all of your unmentionables back into the drawers. Now, I am a pretty open person so it doesn't cause ME embarrassment. However I am sure that my older gentleman neighbor who was over today may have blushed quite a bit.

Wow
 

That awkward moment when, after attending a Grand Opening (serious amounts of champagne) with your femme, you go home feeling very... On. You follow your femme to the restroom (a few short steps from the living room), and proceed to have very rough, loud, demanding sex with her. On all fours, her head banging into the bathroom door loudly, her yelling out "Daddy I want to cum, please!" You finish... only to realize that your teenagers, aged 17-15 have arrived home from the movies with a handful of friends and are all in the aforementioned living room. Your femme straightens herself out, and walks through without making eye contact with anyone, You walk through just clearing your throat, making your way to the bedroom. All you hear as you walk through the kitchen is one word from one of the teenagers.... "Wow"

That awkward moment when You and Your femme are having drinks, a few too many perhaps, and Your femme (who is off work for the Christmas Holidays) calls into the office to check messages, she leaves a message for the owner afterwards, and then hands You the phone to set down. After You set the phone down, femme starts talking mad trash about the other girl that works at the agency, You join in, remembering this other girl over the years and offering up stories for fodder. You look at the phone, and realize.... You did not hit the end button. Your femme then realizes that everything that was said... was recorded, and will be found by the other girl, as she is the one opening the agency on the first day back after the holidays. You and femme hijack teenage mini fem to drive your drunk asses to the agency at midnight so femme can delete messages lol.

That awkward moment when you can't find your chopstick because you used it to get your hair off your neck...

That awkward moment when you exit the shower and take out every towel bar, knock down every cabinet, knock everything off the sink, and leave the shower running because there is a SPIDER in the corner of the ceiling. Suddenly you are able to leap buildings in a single bound. :|

I hearrrddd that lol

That awkward moment when someone practically tells you that you should have had a V8. *sigh*

...when you're writing a term paper and suddenly a memory pops in your head so real you can almost feel it. You fall into the memory, pulling yourself to reality when you realize your roomies are staring at you and 45 minutes have passed

I would NEVER have that happen.....

......... search for your keys for what seems like hours, only to have someone tell you they are in your hand.........:|

Another awkward moment...
 

:glasses: I usually keep my glasses on at work. However, for some reason I took them off and set them on my desk before a meeting. During the Live meeting/Conference call, I couldn't see a dang thing. No big deal, it wasn't my turn for the power point. I told my boss, and the others in the room ( muted on the call of course because it's the right thing to do ) that I was going to run back to my desk and grab my Testicles....meaning to say Spectacles. That has been a lot of fun everyone telling me to be sure my testicles are on for my meetings.

That awkward moment when you and your boss leave work to go get a morning snack, come back and just silently stand for a moment waiting for the other to unlock the door. Neither of us remembered to bring the keys with us.

That awkward moment when ...
 

You are watching a movie and you see similarities between "that" character (I hope you all know what I mean) and your own personality. Good grief LOL

That awkward moment when the femme from your past joins this site, reads your posts in "that awkard moment" .... knowing they are about her..... and she thanks them

That awkward moment when someone sends you a txt asking a favor and you can't bring yourself to ask a question in return.

~F..*** awkward
 

...moment... when you realize you've become the older lesbian younger women hit on... "Will you text me tomorrow?"... The fact I spoke with your mother more than I did to you on your 21 bday should answer that question.

Also, when you asked for my number and I said I worked for the FBI and I don't give out my number should've come as a second clue. But yes, you were cute *S And...your mom is a school nurse ....

...f*** Awkward.....

That awkward moment when you txt your wifey, who's moved away recently, telling her how much you miss her and how badly you need her to be rubbing on your cock.... And you get a reply from her phone, it's her 19 yr old daughter saying mom left her phone at the apartment while she ran to the store o_O

http://images.nationalgeographic.com...97_600x450.jpg

The moment that I have to tell you that this is a picture of mold

TAM when you realize you had the TOTALLY wrong idea about things, but you've already opened your mouth...

This happens to me often.

http://www.sherv.net/cm/emoticons/em...miley-face.gif

From a friend's FB page...
 

more shopping fun!
 

So....I went to the self checkout at Walmart...typically I won't. I feel it takes jobs away...and as a former cashier...I don't love that...nor do I love paying to check my own things out...but I digress...

I'm done with my order....and gathering my things...and the automated stoopid voice keeps telling me every 3 seconds to "Please take your items!" and I'm trying to get my wallet in my bag and get the 3 bags of stuff I bought....and the endless rant of the voice thing is unnerving......so I started saying under my breath, " I AM taking my items!" "Give me a minute!" which ultimately turns into......"Shut the fuck up!!" because I'm peeved by now....and I look up to find....the REAL cashier that supervises the auto check out...is RIGHT THERE.... Sooo I smile and say... "I hate these things!!" and she tells me to have a good day.......

I'm going to start headlining these stories as "reasons I should be a hermit" :|

Car fun!
 

Before Coffee:
So...I woke up and my car was plowed in....

I'm trying to get IN the car to get it started and warm it up to make the whole clearing off easier....

I try and try to open the door...but it's frozen shut...I thought :|
After pulling and pulling and getting it open only a crack...and then trying to get my fingers in enough to really pull....then....I suddenly realize...the snow is piled sooo high it is blocking the door from opening... :blink:

After Coffee:
So...
My dad went out and cleared off my car <3 (I stayed over since the roads were bad after work)
I get in to leave...I have the door open...and without thinking, turn on the wipers....and end up with a lap full of snow....joyousness....

Last night at work:

My employer insisted on walking me down to my car (it couldn't make it up her driveway) and helped me clear off my car...
She pulled up my wiper blade to clear my windshield on her side and it comes off in her hand :| Long story short...we fumbled in the dark giggling like girls because we Just COULD NOT get it....I was going to resort to tying the wiper on with yarn... (we did try...lol ) but she decided electrical tape would be best....it's still on there...so.... :hangloose:

more weather fun....
 

Totally forgot this one...or two....

I get to my dad's house last night...taking refuge from the snow after a 3 hour drive (that typically takes an hour) from work.

My dad, his best friend and my brother are all sitting down to dinner... I come in and take off my soaking wet freezing cold shoes....at that time I realize that my scrub pants are drenched on the bottom....and as I try to walk, there are balls of ice in the cuffs that are so big I nearly trip on them. I exclaim...without thinking, "I can't walk with these big balls in my pants!!" :|

So....then....

I hurry to the bathroom....cuz I'm dying to pee....I get in the bathroom and plop down....completely forgetting this is a male dominated environment...and about fall in cuz the seat is up :| My shrieks were heard by all....

That awkward moment when your normally distant kitty is loving and snuggly all day. And then you realize at the end of the day she shat all over your nice clean sheets and she looks at you like she did a good deed.

Yo Beas!
 

That awkward moment when your sister walks in on you having phone sex! This happened to me years ago. She was so pissed at me. As I was doing this on her sofa! :|

That awkward moment...
 

That awkward moment when ....this Femme yells out OH MY GOD, I'VE GOT A HARD ON!! I WANT THAT!!! then she discovers her roommate's door wasn't shut and he heard EVERYTHING !

(I am not responsible for my spontaneous excitement when loopy on pain meds)

That ohhh so awkward moment.....

I was at wally world.... in a big hurry...walked in the lady's room and found they had.... remodeled. I was JUST thinking...hmmm those are some funny sinks....when it struck me... I was in the men's room :|

I hurried my happy ass out of there...and OF COURSE....no one saw me go in to stop me.. but when I came out there were 3 cashiers staring....one of them is particularly witty (and knows me since I'm there wayyyy too much) and says...."well...I had no idea that's how you rolled...."

Well, at least now I know what it looks like.....ahem