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Firsts...
Seconds.... Chances... Risks.... Awareness.... |
SUPER BOWL SUNDAY !!! YEAH BABY !!!! GOOOO PATRIOTS !!!!
BOOM SHACKALACKA BOOM !! |
Having an ex come back in to my life.
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Quote:
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Pondering the concept of a person tying them self to the couch and wth is fun about that. Lmao
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Given my former occupation, I got into the habit of reading the obituaries. Im noticing how the way they are written is now reflecting societal changes. There is one today for an unfortunate young woman who died from "an drug overdose after living with addictive illness for many years". Overdoses are becoming a very disturbing pattern in this area. Sometimes, acknowledging something makes it very real and helps to erase the stigmas associated with it. There is one where the first survivor listed is her puppy. I can relate to this cuz my cat was the first thing mentioned in my will. There is one where the survivors are listed as her parents - mother, father, other father, and other father. This is the first time I have seen more than two parents listed without the use of "step parent". |
My Doctor appointment with my primary Doc today.. Hope to get some questions answered.. But I am nervous as hell lot of stuff to go over and I know she will be happy with the weight loss but it is the other stuff that scares the hell out of me and after the appointment good or bad I have to go to work..
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Wondering what my new MRI will show on my lower back? It's been 7 yrs since my injury that I had one done.
Worried about my soc. sec. disability review paperwork questionaire I filled out if it will trigger a review from "Their Doctors" whom have never seen me. I worry everytime I have to fill that crap out. I don't want to have a fight on my hands, they already agreed from my doctors reports that I was disabled, and I don't want anything to happen to that decision they made 7yrs ago. Nothing has gotten better. My ptsd, depression, anxiety and back pain are what disabled me in the first place and all that's still there. ugh. I hate having to worry about the unknown. I think I"d freak the fuck out if I lost my disabilty because no one will hire me because everything I know how to do involves using my back. UGH UGH UGH. ps. I think I'm a worry wort. :( |
Morphing my moon tattoo into a dream catcher. I'm finding really intricate ones on pinterst with beautiful partial coloring and it's making me want it.
I've been looking at artists today for my new one and then I found the dream catchers, and it never ends :) |
It's pretty cool to be able to make mistakes and keep going....best skill ever!!!
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Can't sleep. Our daughter's pre-op appointment is today. The weather is not co-operating. I'm so worried we won't be able to go. Worried sick about the surgery, but know it is needed and will start her on her way to being one step closer to better. I know she's scared - I'm scared too - But she'll never know that. So thankful for the love, support and strength we are blessed to have surround us each and every day. Okay - That's all - Going to go back to distracting myself. :waitinggirl: |
Getting out and going up to Niagara Falls today for a hike and to soak in the beauty that is up there. I hope to get some good pictures of the frozen falls. It is one of my favoite places and just kind of needing the reconnect and grounding today. Time to hike and get out of my own head for a while..
:moonstars: |
What is on my mind?
The amount of pain I am in. I am sitting here watching last nights ep. of the americans and I am in so much pain from the lovely tumor that lives inside my lower spine. I am just so sick of being in pain! I am also sick to death of talking about it, thinking about it and dealing with it! Grrrrrrrr!
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Wondering how it will feel when I see the "for sale" sign and the lock box.
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thinking about lunch with my baby sister, a baby that turned 46 a few days ago. SMH she sure makes things complicated for herself.
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This song.
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A, B, and J
B is 10 days post op surgery for AFS and she is still not feeling well. These three have endured a surgery and then a death in their family all within 3 days. Today is the memorial service. :candle: |
Sooooo friggin much....its all a blur...
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The upcoming wedding, my family is still fighting and the wedding is a month away.
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My job interview in about an hour
that I am 40 as of yesterday Spring Equinox Solar Eclipse Ostara Super Moon my desire for warmer weather |
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