Why my ex all of a sudden wants me to come see her and the kids!

I wonder what she wants or has up her sleeve.

My mind has been pondering how people with a history of being victimized in abusive relationships in the past can establish ways of acting that perpetuate abuse in future relationships. They become so used to the pattern that they willingly go to those behaviors when with a new person. This also leads me to believe that chances are the new partner will be abusive too. This was all sparked by a friend I went to undergrad with who is now doing crisis work related to domestic abuse...

I have been abused and I did look for that in other people. I really believe the only thing that "saved" me was my last abusive ex. I made the decision that I wasn't going to allow someone to do that to me again. It took A LOT of work on myself and a few years but I was finally able to stop the cycle.

It is hard because people are drawn to what they know. To break out of the cycle is uncomfortable and scary because it is, in most ways, unknown territory.

One good thing is that it doesn't stay uncomfortable and soon you realize that it is much better than the old ways.

My lady's husband. .

She passed yesterday and I'm worried about him...

He is a stoic man, but when I went by to pay my respects, he hugged me so hard and just cried....

He's keeping busy with her service. .which will be in Israel. ..so I can't attend. ...

How to override the natural reflexes in order to be complaint more easily

My super awesome date tonight

That I think we have the responsibility to be ourselves. One of My friends asked Me what I thought of Barry Manilow coming out so late in life. I first responded- well everyone does it when it "feels right" to them. But, then I followed that up with- we also have a certain responsibility to be visible. To make things a little easier on the next generation as those before us did for us. There are too many young people getting bullied and committing suicide because they are so afraid to come out- or if they do they are bullied back into the closet.

I think that in being visible we help them with their choice. To be their true selves. Especially when someone is famous and have that seriously visible platform. I also realize that not everyone can do that- meaning being visible for whatever reason and I can respect that.

However, I think those that can- should.

The seven pounds I've gained since she left. WTF?

Too much right now......:blink:

On my mind
 

The holidays, I know it is a long way off but I think that I will shake things up in 2017 and travel for the holidays.

The only question is where? Italy, Hawaii, Ireland, California, New Orleans, or somewhere else.

Time to plan.

I am thinking about the good times I use to have in Chicago when 20 or so of us Butches and Femme's use to get together to play softball, order dinner at a bar, and dance afterwards. Since I live next to a big semi-secluded park, I am thinking about advertising for teams again, here.:)

I'm thinking this is a wonderful plan:hangloose: