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-   Support: Abuse, Addiction, Coping (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=10)
-   -   PTSD and Trauma recovery (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=531)

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 09:05 AM
I will not be part of a group where people can see I am there and feel excluded.

On another note, my brain is raw glad I have therapy tomorrow :)

My father was one of my major abusers and as ridiculous as I get (and as funny as it may seem after), when I am spinning out it all seems so real at the time.

He died this time last year and the cemetary has been calling for weeks. I understand times are hard too and I wish I could help Rocky the Cemetary Dude, but I am going to go vacation to London instead of buying a cemetary plot....sounds so much more fun. :) I've been there for work several times, but not had enough free time to go to the museums, dungeons, parks and just enjoy being alive!

Because I'm Still Standing!

christie 03-03-2010 10:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Jewel (Post 59847)
Instead of anyone asking questions evertyone lets their imaginations run wild and start making assumtions and uninformed statemtent. The chat room willbe open to ALL PTSD surviviors that need support. If u want to join, you PM and and you get the password. Simple as that. But everyone felt the need to put their 02. cents in when they really had NO clue how the group was going to be run. It is password protected because people dont want someone who has just wanted to go and have the regular chat I.E The Planet chatroom, to come into the PTSD chatroom and hear their private stuff. Sooo ANYONE that wants to discuss PTSD can get the password. It was ALL put in place so survivors could have confidentitality if THEY needed it. The open forum is awesome for people that are comfortable putting their stuff out in an open forum, some of us are not evolved in our PTSD journey and dont want it in an open forum. There is NOTHING opressive or elitist about than when its open to all members. And as far as breaching this forum thread, its already been discussed and there was NO advertising involved. Someone asked a question and it was answered and then it go bigger. Lets get back to aopcs original thread here and when the kinks have been worked out, an announcement in ANOTHER thread will be made. enough is enough. Do we have to dissect and pick apart every single things thats made public? And no the facilitators arent PHDs. They are people that have been thru PTSD themselves and want to help others. They are just there to make sure we dont sit there and not know what to say to each other. Just to help the convo along.

Even though I have not participated on this thread, I am responding here because Jen asked on another thread if folks would take a peek at this thread to see what she was "missing."

Lady Jewel, with all respect, this feels silencing to me. It did last night when I read it and it still feels so today.

Your response here, as I interpret it, doesn't make me wanna PM you, or anyone, for a passcode for the chat room. It doesn't make me want to open up and pick apart my psyche and my past.

Jewel, you and I have spoken real time and this really took me by surprise. I found you a nice, warm person and I am sure if you read your words here, you can at least see how this might be interpreted.

I think its great that Jen created this thread and folks have found support and understanding from one another. I would hope that continues.

Christie

Princess4u 03-03-2010 12:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by apocalipstic (Post 60154)
I will not be part of a group where people can see I am there and feel excluded.

On another note, my brain is raw glad I have therapy tomorrow :)

My father was one of my major abusers and as ridiculous as I get (and as funny as it may seem after), when I am spinning out it all seems so real at the time.

He died this time last year and the cemetary has been calling for weeks. I understand times are hard too and I wish I could help Rocky the Cemetary Dude, but I am going to go vacation to London instead of buying a cemetary plot....sounds so much more fun. :) I've been there for work several times, but not had enough free time to go to the museums, dungeons, parks and just enjoy being alive!

Because I'm Still Standing!

I hope you have a wonderful time....take lots of pics for us to see..i have always wanted to go!!!!

Andrew, Jr. 03-03-2010 01:33 PM
So from my understanding, there is a chat. What are the times, and what is the room called or whatever? I never have been in chat before. Can whoever the mods are pm me the password. I would like to submit the application to join. I don't want to be a moderator since I suffer from PTSD.

I feel even more silenced than ever before.

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 01:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr. (Post 60287)
So from my understanding, there is a chat. What are the times, and what is the room called or whatever? I never have been in chat before. Can whoever the mods are pm me the password. I would like to submit the application to join. I don't want to be a moderator since I suffer from PTSD.

I feel even more silenced than ever before.
The chat thing is in no way affiliated with this thread, maybe PM the people who started it, or look for the thread Lady Jewell said she was starting about it or maybe pm the admins?. I don't think anyone who is giving out passwords is likely to read this thread anymmore.

This thread is about us sharing and healing together! :) No passwords, no secret handshake and no silencing!

I hope you are having a great day and its not as cold there as it is here. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Andrew, Jr. 03-03-2010 01:48 PM
Apocalipstic,

:givingarose: for you, and then we can both :beerfunnel: & :deal:.

How's that love?!

ox,
Andrew


:kissy:

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 01:52 PM
Only if you grill too! :)

Except its snowing. Again.

Andrew, Jr. 03-03-2010 02:04 PM
Yep, it's snowing here too. :downhillski: Anymore snow, and I am about to tell Dino he can have a fashion show on the stairs. He refuses to go outside when it is raining or snowing. Unbelieveable.

Oh, I grill rain, snow, hail, heat, really any weather. I love to grill. It just goes with me. Sort of like a pipe or cigar in my hand. :happyjump:

Gemme 03-03-2010 02:52 PM
Thank you, Kimbo, for the phone conference suggestion and link! I think that that might help some folks out.

I am not one of those who was interested in the PTSD chat room but I really, really, really don't understand why the idea of folks who are doing peer therapy (because, c'mon...that's what it is) wanting to do it as privately as possible but still want to let others know that it's available if someone wants to make use of it is such an issue for so many.

Do you all invite unknowns into your private discussions and/or therapy sessions? I know, for myself, that rehashing and exploring painful stuff makes me feel vulnerable. When I am and/or feel vulnerable, I react more aggressively....fly off the handle....faster when I feel threatened in that state of mind. There is less control in a chat room and that environment wouldn't be good for me to really delve into my issues, but for some, it could be helpful.

Who am I to get all up in arms about others trying to work through their issues? And to do it as privately as possible on a public forum? We all do what we can. Why do folks feel it necessary to step all over others in their journey to self-help? I just really don't get it.

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 02:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gemme (Post 60325)
Thank you, Kimbo, for the phone conference suggestion and link! I think that that might help some folks out.

I am not one of those who was interested in the PTSD chat room but I really, really, really don't understand why the idea of folks who are doing peer therapy (because, c'mon...that's what it is) wanting to do it as privately as possible but still want to let others know that it's available if someone wants to make use of it is such an issue for so many.

Do you all invite unknowns into your private discussions and/or therapy sessions? I know, for myself, that rehashing and exploring painful stuff makes me feel vulnerable. When I am and/or feel vulnerable, I react more aggressively....fly off the handle....faster when I feel threatened in that state of mind. There is less control in a chat room and that environment wouldn't be good for me to really delve into my issues, but for some, it could be helpful.

Who am I to get all up in arms about others trying to work through their issues? And to do it as privately as possible on a public forum? We all do what we can. Why do folks feel it necessary to step all over others in their journey to self-help? I just really don't get it.
It does not seem helpful to me for someone who wants to be in PTSD chat to be able to see who is in there and not be able to join. It seems mean.

I want no part of it.

I PMed you more details :)

Gemme 03-03-2010 03:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by apocalipstic (Post 60328)
It does not seem helpful to me for someone who wants to be in PTSD chat to be able to see who is in there and not be able to join. It seems mean.

I want no part of it.

I PMed you more details :)

Why can't those who want peer counseling start their own thread and let us have this one to vent and discuss as we please with no guilt that we might "trigger" someone.
Thanks for the pm! Obviously I missed some of the finer details along the way. I still stand that it could be a good thing for folks, given some of the details and procedures change a bit. I'm all for positive personal growth, no matter the method.

Here's the thing....I think this thread and others that touch on sensitive topics ARE a form of peer counseling. After all, we speak our minds, share our experiences, support one another and, hopefully, grow from what we read and learn.

Even though this thread has gone sideways a bit, I do like it and find that I can often learn something about myself when I pop in here to see how others are doing. Many blessings to all.

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 03:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gemme (Post 60334)
Thanks for the pm! Obviously I missed some of the finer details along the way. I still stand that it could be a good thing for folks, given some of the details and procedures change a bit. I'm all for positive personal growth, no matter the method.

Here's the thing....I think this thread and others that touch on sensitive topics ARE a form of peer counseling. After all, we speak our minds, share our experiences, support one another and, hopefully, grow from what we read and learn.

Even though this thread has gone sideways a bit, I do like it and find that I can often learn something about myself when I pop in here to see how others are doing. Many blessings to all.
Thank you Gemme!

I just think if someone already has PTSD, not being allowed to be in the PTSD group would seem pretty triggery!

Liam 03-03-2010 03:30 PM
Okay, reality check—the PTSD group has not officially formed. Lady Jewel has backed out due to personal reasons. Admin has found someone to take over organizing the PTSD group. Last time I checked, who that person is, had not been announced.

Spirit Dancer 03-03-2010 03:32 PM
Over the past few days i've read and re read this thread, with hopes there would be an understanding a meeting of the minds so to speak. If we each stepped in the shoes of Lady Jewel while she sat and read all the things being said how would we feel? I would feel like crap, she too is a PTSD survivor and set to start a place to share our experiences, not a secret society with password protection. It was done with good intentions and the password was to protect those who felt vulnerable, and wanted anonymity.
It was and or is to be a chat area for anyone who wanted to join and needed support could find it there.
Her heart was in the right place, unless i'm missing something. It was brought up in this thread so others who suffered from ptsd would know and might want to partisipate. Funny thing is we forget about those who don't leave their homes due to ptsd and might be able to benefit from such a chat.
Just my opinion

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 03:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liam (Post 60343)
Okay, reality check—the PTSD group has not officially formed. Lady Jewel has backed out due to personal reasons. Admin has found someone to take over organizing the PTSD group. Last time I checked, who that person is, had not been announced.
Gotcha, thank you!

Now maybe we can go back to the thread as originally intended.

:)

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 03:53 PM
Have the chat. The Admins are taking over and hopefully will make the group welcome to anyone who applies. :) Glad to see it!

But I really would like to be able to have this thread to discuss in a public forum.

Please?

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 03:57 PM
I am sorry Lady Jewel is hurt.

:bouquet:

But the people who would not have been allowed in the group would have been/have been hurt too.

julieisafemme 03-03-2010 04:48 PM
I have read this thread from the beginning and I really appreciate it. My only contribution so far has been thanking posts. This let's me participate without having to share. I am not able to. I find help and solace in reading the posts of others.

I appreciate Lady Jewel's attempts at creating other venues to share. I agree with Gemme that this thread is a sort of peer counseling. Chat would not work for me at all. Even if I could get the gumption to request a password I am not able to keep up with the speed of chat. I would also have trouble with the impermanence. I am slooooooow. I need to read and re-read things sometimes several times before I understand them.

There might be others reading who have never thanked or posted or anything. I would hope people would continue to share here for those of us who cannot particpate fully.


Thank you to all of you who have shared your stories.

Apocalipstic 03-03-2010 05:08 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by julieisafemme (Post 60388)
I have read this thread from the beginning and I really appreciate it. My only contribution so far has been thanking posts. This let's me participate without having to share. I am not able to. I find help and solace in reading the posts of others.

I appreciate Lady Jewel's attempts at creating other venues to share. I agree with Gemme that this thread is a sort of peer counseling. Chat would not work for me at all. Even if I could get the gumption to request a password I am not able to keep up with the speed of chat. I would also have trouble with the impermanence. I am slooooooow. I need to read and re-read things sometimes several times before I understand them.

There might be others reading who have never thanked or posted or anything. I would hope people would continue to share here for those of us who cannot particpate fully.


Thank you to all of you who have shared your stories.

Thank you Julie! I am not much of a chatter either...It goes too fast. Or I might not feel like talking about it at the appointed time.

Like the other night, when I was spun out over the cemetery guy calling...I was crying and flipping out and needed somewhere to just vent a bit...in all my ridiculousness.

By the way, my sister was able to reach Rocky the cemetery dude and let him know that anything to do with my dad freaks me out and that I think up all sorts of idiotic scenarios. Like I am sure if bodies were digging up out of their own graves in Goodlestville, it would have been on the news.

I did not get to see his body after he died and some days I worry that he will show back up and his death will have been a happy dream.

My doctor says I have zero affect when I talk about my childhood...I talk about it like it was someone else. Like all that stuff happened to someone else.

Stuff that has happened to me as an adult that is really bad, does not even seem to touch me that much..I react like it's no big deal....

AtLast 03-03-2010 05:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spirit Dancer (Post 60346)
Over the past few days i've read and re read this thread, with hopes there would be an understanding a meeting of the minds so to speak. If we each stepped in the shoes of Lady Jewel while she sat and read all the things being said how would we feel? I would feel like crap, she too is a PTSD survivor and set to start a place to share our experiences, not a secret society with password protection. It was done with good intentions and the password was to protect those who felt vulnerable, and wanted anonymity.
It was and or is to be a chat area for anyone who wanted to join and needed support could find it there.
Her heart was in the right place, unless i'm missing something. It was brought up in this thread so others who suffered from ptsd would know and might want to partisipate. Funny thing is we forget about those who don't leave their homes due to ptsd and might be able to benefit from such a chat.
Just my opinion

Because I am a recovering agoraphobic (a life long process) stemming from early life trauma/PTSD, I deeply hope that others understand just how valuable this could be. I often wonder if I had been able to communicate via the web in support groups/chats while my agoraphobia was active, if I could have made progress faster. Dunno. There are a lot of very good reasons for someone to seek anonymous safety, especially in this community. I'd like to think that folks here don't gossip, but this is just not true. Frankly, I don't feel safe in telling my story here at all. Not all the details anyway and I know I disclose quite a bit here (however, in the scheme of things, not much.. not the really painful stuff at all). I will disclose some things when I see others struggling to support them. But, no way would I disclose anything other than being an agoraphobic without password protection.

That being said, I feel like this open forum thread can offer a lot in banishing myths about PTSD in general.


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