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-   -   TMI - Too Much Information (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1408)

betenoire 05-18-2010 09:13 PM

TMI - Too Much Information
 
The weak of stomache or heart might wanna stay out of this thread, thanks.

I'll go first. Superfemme will go second cuz she promised.

Back when I lost my virginity I did a real good job of it. It wasn't like 5 minutes in the backseat of a volvo, it was in an apartment and basically 7 days straight of screwing. Cuz I am never half-assed about anything, dig?

Anyway, I think that we mighta knocked my urethra out of alignment or something, because starting at about day 4 if I sat on the toilet to pee the stream of urine would actually arc up and over the toilet seat and directly onto my shoes. Each and every time. It CLEARED the toilet seat completely. Totally bizzare. So I had to develop a new pee-strategy wherein I would lean way forward and grab my ankles and squat over the seat so that my bellybutton was parallel with the floor.

It looked dumb, but it helped me to avoid pee-shoes.

The_Lady_Snow 05-18-2010 09:27 PM

When I was 19 I went into a grocery store and stold a steak.. Cooked it up and ate it.. It was so good and I felt no guilt.:vampire:

betenoire 05-18-2010 09:32 PM

My urine frequently smells like coffee.

SuperFemme 05-18-2010 09:34 PM

Let's pretend I'm the second post shall we?

I have no good TMI related to the pee. Dammit.

I did once fake fellatio on a big stick popsicle and it broke off in my throat. Like three or four inches of it. Everyone stared blankly while I choked to death.

Then I drank some hot tap water until it shrank enough to swallow.

I have been afraid of big sticks ever since.

The_Lady_Snow 05-18-2010 09:38 PM

Once my mom performed a back yard exorcism on me in front of my whole family, after finding my Doctor's bag in the garage, I hid it there when I had come home around 8 the next day..

betenoire 05-18-2010 09:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuperFemme (Post 109472)
I have been afraid of big sticks ever since.

That's not what I heard! Bah dum bom shinnk!

SuperFemme 05-18-2010 09:40 PM

Snowy thought her allergy to her Momma's chihuahua was a covert attempt on her life. For like three years or something.

The_Lady_Snow 05-18-2010 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by betenoire (Post 109482)
That's not what I heard! Bah dum bom shinnk!




SuperFemme 05-18-2010 09:42 PM

You KNOW that hamster was after my jugular vein. Damn you Heather.

Medusa 05-18-2010 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow (Post 109458)
When I was 19 I went into a grocery store and stold a steak.. Cooked it up and ate it.. It was so good and I felt no guilt.:vampire:


Food thieves unite!

When I was 19, I stole a pound of bacon!!

The_Lady_Snow 05-18-2010 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuperFemme (Post 109488)
Snowy thought her allergy to her Momma's chihuahua was a covert attempt on her life. For like three years or something.


Um...
:dontfeedmods:

It is not ok for you to TMI about other people Guera...

:sugarglider:

SuperFemme 05-18-2010 09:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow (Post 109495)
Um...
:dontfeedmods:

It is not ok for you to TMI about other people Guera...

:sugarglider:

Oh. Damnit. :argue:

betenoire 05-18-2010 09:47 PM

My TMI is way way way more TMI than the rest of y'alls TMI. :( I am sad.

:dots:

SuperFemme 05-18-2010 09:48 PM

I like to people watch. A lot.

WolfyOne 05-18-2010 09:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuperFemme (Post 109500)
I like to people watch. A lot.



I like a lot of people.....watch :groupphoto:

The_Lady_Snow 05-18-2010 09:56 PM

My mom took me to a circus once, I hyperventilated cause I got so upset over the animals.. It may have caused a huge ruckus.:lawnmower:

Medusa 05-18-2010 09:56 PM

Since Potty needs more TMI:

My Pops and Pappy were over here tonight getting their hair cut and I totally farted SO loud that my 90-year-old Pappy whipped around and started laughing and said "Ah OH!" and then my Pops said, "Is there a giant duck in here?"


TMI enough? :trampoline:

SuperFemme 05-18-2010 09:57 PM

I pooped my pants the first day of kindergarten. I was wearing cowboy boots and it just sort of fell in them. My mom was horrified when I took my shoes off in the car that afternoon.

Medusa 05-18-2010 10:00 PM

Many of you have already heard this but I totally pooped in a potted plant on the balcony of a VERY fancy hotel one time.

And then I wiped with a leaf that I ended up being allergic to. :|

SuperFemme 05-18-2010 10:00 PM

I know I shouldn't....but am dying to know how the butt allergy manifested itself.


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