Rambling thoughts from a single butch...
 

Being relatively new to this site - I wasn't sure what "forum" to post my thoughts to...but being singe...I thought this might do...(if anyone who reads thinks it would fit better in another place - please advise...I won't be offended)...

After reading several posts and threads and feeling a bit of need to connect myself - I thought I would put some words down... thanks!

As I sit here tonight…I read many posts on here…some content and happy with who they are…and in their relationships…some, so obviously lonely and searching for that “something” … I find myself rather “in between” … I know that a “relationship” doesn’t define me or make me happy … it can only “enhance” my happiness … but, still… I believe in love…I believe in the possibility… so …on this fading winter evening as I sit by the fire with a glass of cognac in one hand, and an old worn and tattered copy of Thoreau's Walden in the other. . .soft music plays in the background.

I take off my glasses and rub my eyes and think. . .

Why have I just spent the Christmas holiday alone...

I have turned off the TV and music and listen to the crackle of fire and the rhythm of my sleeping dog, completely relaxed on his warm, soft bedding beside me.

I sink a little deeper into my old leather desk chair and take pen in hand and actually "pen this post", before I type it out.

There is still even in this digital age, something about actually "writing" out a note, that might somehow find its way to someone's heart. Romantic. Ah, yes, that I am.

I listened to the song earlier: My Grown up Christmas List. (as it is still officially the holiday season I suppose and Christmas music still plays on the radio). I like that song, I like music. . .all kinds, but admittedly, yes, mostly country.

So, I thought about what my "Christmas List" might be, and so, here goes:

A woman who is genuine and sincere, that appreciates the serious side of life and yet, not so serious, that they can't and/or won't just bust out with laughter, when something is funny-a woman who can find humor and smile, even through the seriousness.

A woman who can appreciate me for exactly "who" I am, and not want to change me, at least not basically. Encourage me to eat more green beans, but knows that I am a meat and potato sort of person, and at my age, that isn't going to change much.

A woman who wants me to "want" her, not just in the beginning when love is all new and fresh, but after 6 weeks or 6 months, 6 years, or however many years we might have together.

A woman who knows and appreciates that I am sometimes quiet and shy, but will speak my opinion when needed and or asked, but never in a negative way. Certainly differing opinions will arise, but that doesn't mean it always has to be one or the other.

A woman who is nice and kind, with just a touch of "naughty" in all the right ways.

A woman who still blushes at the touch of my hand on hers, or when it curls around hers while we sit in the back at the movies.

A woman who can appreciate and know that my dogs are my family, not just pets I keep out in the backyard in a cage.

A woman who appreciates the unique work that I do, that it is often very long hours, and stressful, (sometimes dangerous), but that I am always mindful of not letting in get in the way of paying attention to her.

A woman who appreciates that I am a romantic, that I enjoy holding open the door, a gentle peck on the cheek, washing her car, carrying in the groceries. It is not to take away "independence", but hopefully understands and likes that I am just a little bit old school.

A woman who likes to put on a little black dress and go rock the night away, but is just as comfortable in her faded blue jeans and my old t-shirt, curled up on the couch, watching. . ."whatever".

A woman who takes care of herself and appreciates that I love that she takes her time and will always wait patiently for her.

A woman who appreciates that I love to surprise her for no particular reason, and won't scold me for being "frivolous" when I send flowers...I am very responsible, but love to spoil the woman I love when and if that is possible.

A woman who appreciates that I love to make it about her, but understands, that every once in awhile, it would be great if it was about "me", just every once in awhile.

A woman who knows that I care about and will always be concerned about her, and understand that "concern" doesn't mean I want to keep track of her every move, just that when you love. . .you are concerned.

A woman who loves nature, and art and books and philosophy and animals and old people, and children and butterflies and. . .and. . .and. . .

A woman who wants to be cared for deeply and passionately and showed how much I care. . ..

A woman who wants me to want her, in every way. . .and appreciates the fact that she always takes my breath away. . .

A woman who understands that life can be difficult, relationships can be difficult, but that communication is essential…that my heart has been a bit broken and battered, but that just makes me ever more mindful that hearts are fragile and great care should be taken….

A woman who wants to be loved from the inside- out and grow into a relationship…

A woman who understands that I am a butch and actually loves and appreciates that about me and wants that. . .

A woman who loves that she can make me blush.

I'm sure that if I thought longer, my list would go on … but I've perhaps taken up enough of your time, and given you at least some insight as to my thoughts on this wintery evening...


I want to sit on the couch next to a woman and have her say to me - as the new country song says. . .what would you be doing if you hadn't met me..

If you want to know more…well, that’s easy enough…just hit respond…I’m just right here…

I realize this is not a “dating” site (per se) – those get old and are full of people who seem to be only looking for the quick thrill (or so has been my experience)… and seem so ingenious…this is rather more a sharing of as they used to do in the days of old - of tying a piece of twine around a note and throwing out among the tumble weeds – hoping someone would read…

So, as my evening has turned to morning…I tie up my note and throw it out into the “tumbleweeds” of this wonderful forum - maybe some wonderful femme will read them...or indeed a fellow butch - who would like to write or respond as well - because they like to connect with like minded travelers (so to speak).

Have a beautiful day friends…

Wow. All I can say is wow. and thank you for your ramblings.

my wish list
 

I will write more later, but what you have said here, is exactly what most of us femmes search for. Just change out the femme to butch, the her to he, and that is what I want, anyways. Beautifully written, and I can tell it is from the heart.


humbly,
Candice

yeah. what she said.

___YOU are very welcome - and I send the thanks right back. Have a beautiful day.

I will patiently wait for "more later" ... :) ...Thank you for your kind response - and yes, it is from my heart...

What's your sign??

Thank you, NIGHTrambler--I am wildly anticipating your next post!

______I am an aquarian.

_____Wow... "wild anticipation" ... :) such a compliment (and I blush) ... Have a beautiful day...

...just know that for some of us butches...no wait...I'll speak for myself only, the little black dress part is a no go **chuckles**

Agree though...and it is not surprising to see at our soft-hearted, romantic friend here is an Aquarian...our sign rocks!! ;)

So if the little black dress is a "no go", then what would be the preference?

How about a nicely pressed, sexy black shirt? :2butch:

____I know this question was for scubadyke - but I agree with them ... a nicely pressed (sexy) black shirt... I've got one of those ... in case anyone is interested.... :)

____Yep - that's the way to go! :)

Letterstodaddy have you met Nightrambler?

NightRambler have you met Letterstodaddy?


*Cheesey Grin*

_______No, I have not yet had the pleasure to meet letterstodaddy...

Hmmm, I can do that one.

Ok...so let's just lay it out then...

A Great Catch = An Aquarian romantic at heart in a sexy black shirt who goes by NighTrambler :)

...just my humble opinion Ladies...but wouldn't let this one slip by ;)

Well, what do you know? Aquarius femme here, birthday two days apart :flowers:

Getting in line . . .
 

I have a client who I think might fit the bill ... where can I get an application, and when is the deadline?

____Ahhh...you are much to kind, but thank you..I do appreciate your thumbs up! :) ...Have a great evening!

soooo, scuba, are you now putting yourself out there as a matchmaker??? Hmmm, how do I get my OWN wish list to you?

Well....nice to meet you and I'll say Happy Birthday (in advance) ... :)

______No application - no deadline - :) - All replies welcome of course! :)

I've met some wonderful people today - what a great community this is!

_____don't know about Scuba - but I am accepting "wish lists" ... :) :) ... have a great evening!

Good evening
 

After a lovely day, I returned to the dogs/cats/house I am looking after while my friend is visiting her family abroad.

Now, without reading your wish list again, Night, I am adding a couple of very important wants and needs.

Dogs were given beef bones yesterday to keep them occupied while i perved BFP. Karma is indeed a bitch. I came home to kennels decorated in thrown up bits of bones. So, the femme had to clean it all up.

House is cold. Femme tries to chop a bit of kindling to get the wood stove going. Butch from Ohio tells her it sounds like she is tapping her nails on the table. Femme did a damned fine job!!! The fire is burning away now, and the animals won't freeze.

The bedding in the kennel is covered in Great Dane slime and puke. Femme has the laundry going, and throws in the bath mat since someone's dirty paws left a mess.

This either speaks to the femme who may not need a butch, or to one who would be disciplined for giving the dogs uncooked beef bones in the first place.

Thoughts???? :praying:



p.s. I love doing laundry, and would have that on my application form Night. lol

____Hmn ... dog slime, wood and laundry....that's quite the combination! lol! Well, I am quite sure that more than a few femmes are capable of cleaning up dog slime and/or chopping wood - but, my thought is - why would you of course, when your butch is quite capable as well and willing to do that for you...:) and if I wasn't going to be around - it would of course be my complete pleasure to make sure the wood was chopped and neatly stacked for you to just be able to get what you needed without the "chopping" process of course...and the dog slime? Well...the uncooked bones would just be a lesson learned for next time - and I would still clean up the dog slime regardless...:) - onto laundry...I am "capable" of doing laundry - better at chopping wood...lol! - As a matter of fact some of my laundry when I get done probably looks like its been under the axe...lol! So, as I walk by the two piles of it - just sitting there...yes, it would be nice for some wonderful femme to say - don't worry about it - I got this...lol! - I would not refuse volunteers....if no one comes forward ... I will have to tackle this myself....soon! lol!

Have a great day ... and remember no bones for pups...uncooked ones that is! :) ....

**laughing** I can't even match myself so you may want to rethink that request!

Cheers :)

mmmmm........the only bones you should give your dog are bones of the uncooked variety.....something else probably upset their little tummies....

as to the discipline part........well I am sure there is a different good reason for discipline.......laughin...

Due to the morn hour, I sensed the sunrise and I've yet to set aside the drink, my ink and quill, and paper and assorted sundries to lift my spoon of special k and non-fat milk and at this precise moment my own tattered copy of the Thoreau slipped from my modest bosom into the pile of dogs and laundry that I've accumulated over the past 6 weeks. Thankfully there are no injuries to report, least of all, my pride!

You had me at Thoreau..............

_____THANK you so much for your kind words and thoughts and I have actually been to Austin (having lived in Houston for a time being years ago) - it is a lovely place and Texas is indeed a great place to have a party! :)

_____THANK you so much...i indeed see the possibility of hope before even more now than before. Thanks again!

THANK you...
 

Dear Community,

Once again as I sit in the quiet of the night and read some of the beautiful and most sincere replies both to my posting and in private messages - I am over-whelmed in a good way at the kindness and general good will and humor to which all of you have responded to my ramblings.

Thank you to each of you - I look forward to knowing all of you more.

This is a wonderful, caring and yes, as I said humorous community (and where would we be without humor) - but more than all of that - the acceptance and ease with which new people are welcomed and given encouragement speaks to each of you and the care you show to all those who enter this planet. Kudos to ALL of you for being the unique and caring individuals you are - both butches and femmes...

AND btw...thanks to all of those who have volunteered to do my laundry...made me smile...:)

Have a beautiful New Year Holiday - and be safe. I look forward .... and I hope you do as well.

ENJOY the day - with grateful mind and heart - NIGHTrambler

Just put us in your pocket and carry us around, we'll make everything fun. Okay the practicalities of a bunch of butches and femmes in your pocket is making me giggle. would we be in separate pockets. would we be scrambling to tempt each other into the others pocket. yes there are so many ways this could go.

____well....All I can say to that is not say anything - rather simply just :)