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-   -   What attracts you to Ftms ...... (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1235)

Billy 04-25-2010 05:38 AM

What attracts you to Ftms ......
 
This is open to all !


What is it that attracts you to Ftms or Mtf and if there are some turn offs as well . Why you would or wouldn't consider dating or being in a relationship with etc ...

Looking forward to reading your thoughts :)

morningstar55 04-25-2010 06:24 AM

... there cute.... hehe..
ok all kiding aside......

im more of well personality, character and who they are as a person.... not whats in the pants so to speak.... yes I would date someone that is ftm/TG :o

MsMerrick 04-25-2010 07:13 AM

Billy, FTM's are men. in my book. I am occasionally attracted to men, so I am occasionally attracted to an FTM. That is quite different for me, than my attraction to Butches, or my attraction to women, which tends to be Butches.. and much more all encompassing, which is to say I am way too often attracted to people I don't necessarily like or wish to partner with. :)
Make any sense?
I have occasionally dated an FTM, post transition, and found it ..difficult, but .. for the right fit, I wouldn't say I would never do that again.
But t hen I admit I find the idea of dating anyone, a tad moot :)

Billy 04-25-2010 10:04 AM

Thanks Merrick and Morning star :)

owen4u1904 04-25-2010 10:13 AM

My ftms
 
I am on youtube and I know quite a few ftms through that one cause they have all documented their transistion (sp?). But most I know....I know their personality. And to be honest, I am attracted to bio males but I would never be in a relationship with them. However, which is something I dont get it...but I love who I love. I am a person...and I am very attracted to ftms and I have dated an ftm once. It was during their transition phase though. Overall though, its personality through and through. :)

Gemme 04-25-2010 10:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Billy (Post 91712)
This is open to all !


What is it that attracts you to Ftms or Mtf and if there are some turn offs as well . Why you would or wouldn't consider dating or being in a relationship with etc ...

Looking forward to reading your thoughts :)


I've dated an FTM and it didn't work for (at least) one very important reason....he wanted no connection to his previous life or community. So, for me to consider dating an FTM, he'd have to want to remain a part of....or at least acknowledge....the community that I am (and will continue to be) a part of and connected to.

Oh, and looks don't hurt either. *grin*

Turn offs are pretty much the same across the gender and/or sexuality board for me....not being kind to small children, elderly women crossing the road and waitstaff will not earn anyone any cookies from me. Basically, take pride in your appearance and self and try to be the best person you can be (aka not being a douche bag, which we all are very capable of being) and understand that I will be trying to do the same and, on different days, we will have different success rates.

Billy 04-25-2010 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme (Post 91809)

I've dated an FTM and it didn't work for (at least) one very important reason....he wanted no connection to his previous life or community. So, for me to consider dating an FTM, he'd have to want to remain a part of....or at least acknowledge....the community that I am (and will continue to be) a part of and connected to.

Oh, and looks don't hurt either. *grin*

Turn offs are pretty much the same across the gender and/or sexuality board for me....not being kind to small children, elderly women crossing the road and waitstaff will not earn anyone any cookies from me. Basically, take pride in your appearance and self and try to be the best person you can be (aka not being a douche bag, which we all are very capable of being) and understand that I will be trying to do the same and, on different days, we will have different success rates.

Thanks Gemme !

I was just saying the other day , I am not sorry that I was born female .If I had been born male I would have missed out on meeting and dating some awesome people :) I would not be able to take part in things like the Prom coming up in Aug ...So I try to stay connected to the community ...I don't ever want Me to change the way someone Id's :)

Gemme 04-25-2010 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Billy (Post 91813)
Thanks Gemme !

I was just saying the other day , I am not sorry that I was born female .If I had been born male I would have missed out on meeting and dating some awesome people :) I would not be able to take part in things like the Prom coming up in Aug ...So I try to stay connected to the community ...I don't ever want Me to change the way someone Id's :)

Exactly!

Our own identities are fine. But when it crosses that line and forces your partner to change theirs to conform or to keep you, then that's just not right.

I agree; our community has some awesome folks!

Diva 04-25-2010 10:40 AM

I guess I would have to say that I am first attracted to Someone's personality first....their spirit...their soul....and oh, look!....He's an FtM.....ok then.

I appreciate the male energy, to be certain (and other things <smile> ), but I also appreciate the two~spirited guy....something with which bio males don't seem to be blessed.

Did that make sense?





Billy 04-25-2010 10:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diva (Post 91819)
I guess I would have to say that I am first attracted to Someone's personality first....their spirit...their soul....and oh, look!....He's an FtM.....ok then.

I appreciate the male energy, to be certain (and other things <smile> ), but I also appreciate the two~spirited guy....something with which bio males don't seem to be blessed.

Did that make sense?





Yes it does ! And thank you :)

Emmy 04-25-2010 11:11 AM

In anyone, of any sex or gender, I suppose I’m attracted to depth and complexity and the strength of character to be true to oneself and one’s ideals, even when it’s hard.

Billy 04-25-2010 11:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emmy (Post 91838)
In anyone, of any sex or gender, I suppose I’m attracted to depth and complexity and the strength of character to be true to oneself and one’s ideals, even when it’s hard.

Thank you Emmy :)

Soft*Silver 04-25-2010 12:40 PM

I have dated bio men and they fell flat on the sustained-attraction meter. I might have liked the way they looked but as soon as they opened their mouths or I took them out in public, the meter jumped way over to "unappealing". I am fiercely not attracted to bio men in general.

But I am attracted to FtMs. I like how Diva said its the 2 spirit thing. I know (which is different than merely believing) that FtMs are men from the get go regardless of what their undies held in. Going thru life as a male in a female body creates an incredible journey thru life. They pick up all the social nuances females are given, and while they dont claim them as their own, they are acutely aware of them in the women in their lives.I know when their eyes are on me, they see within me, not just the outside. When they draw me in sexually, they know what I am experiencing. Not because they experienced it...but because they Know about "it"..that which makes me a woman. Bio men dont have that glimpse into the femmes soul.

I also like to date FtMs because they have had to work hard at who they are. They are warriors on the inside. They are committed to themselves. I cant tell you how appalling it is to get asked out by a creepy crawler..you know the kind...the ones who lay on the basement couch watching jerry springer and eating orange food (cheese whiz and cheetos) ...creepy crawlers are almost always bio men gone bad. Not all bio men are bad. But there are enough of them to limit their dating pool to like 1%. FtMs, however, are their own knights in shining armours. They have battled the culture, their family, their religions, the LGBT world, their partners, their job related people and the neighbors next door. You have to admire the hell out of them on this alone. And I like dating FtMs because of the magic. Alchemy. Changing something entirely to create something else. And because they work so hard on it, damn they sure look good! I dont want to single anyone out but yeah, I will. Bo is a prime example of what I am talking about. I have watched from afar his transition and I got to tell you, he is a handsome man...incredibly handsome man. Some woman is going to be very lucky to get him as a partner. He is invested in himself without the narcissitic privelaged personality bio men culturally inherit.

I have dated a few FtMs. And I would again. I have dated some butches who really wanted to transition but felt unable to. How sad for them....I still hope they will someday.

One other thing about dating an FtM...the ones I have dated were very schooled in dating ettiquette. I had my doors opened for me, flowers sent, lovely little suprises left for me, good nite phone calls where they sung me to sleep....it was magical because they were such good daters! They knew how to be the gentleman to my gentle lady that I am...

DapperButch 04-25-2010 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness (Post 91897)
I have dated bio men and they fell flat on the sustained-attraction meter. I might have liked the way they looked but as soon as they opened their mouths or I took them out in public, the meter jumped way over to "unappealing". I am fiercely not attracted to bio men in general.

But I am attracted to FtMs. I like how Diva said its the 2 spirit thing. I know (which is different than merely believing) that FtMs are men from the get go regardless of what their undies held in. Going thru life as a male in a female body creates an incredible journey thru life. They pick up all the social nuances females are given, and while they dont claim them as their own, they are acutely aware of them in the women in their lives.I know when their eyes are on me, they see within me, not just the outside. When they draw me in sexually, they know what I am experiencing. Not because they experienced it...but because they Know about "it"..that which makes me a woman. Bio men dont have that glimpse into the femmes soul.

I also like to date FtMs because they have had to work hard at who they are. They are warriors on the inside. They are committed to themselves. I cant tell you how appalling it is to get asked out by a creepy crawler..you know the kind...the ones who lay on the basement couch watching jerry springer and eating orange food (cheese whiz and cheetos) ...creepy crawlers are almost always bio men gone bad. Not all bio men are bad. But there are enough of them to limit their dating pool to like 1%. FtMs, however, are their own knights in shining armours. They have battled the culture, their family, their religions, the LGBT world, their partners, their job related people and the neighbors next door. You have to admire the hell out of them on this alone. And I like dating FtMs because of the magic. Alchemy. Changing something entirely to create something else. And because they work so hard on it, damn they sure look good! I dont want to single anyone out but yeah, I will. Bo is a prime example of what I am talking about. I have watched from afar his transition and I got to tell you, he is a handsome man...incredibly handsome man. Some woman is going to be very lucky to get him as a partner. He is invested in himself without the narcissitic privelaged personality bio men culturally inherit.

I have dated a few FtMs. And I would again. I have dated some butches who really wanted to transition but felt unable to. How sad for them....I still hope they will someday.

One other thing about dating an FtM...the ones I have dated were very schooled in dating ettiquette. I had my doors opened for me, flowers sent, lovely little suprises left for me, good nite phone calls where they sung me to sleep....it was magical because they were such good daters! They knew how to be the gentleman to my gentle lady that I am...

Great, powerful post. <thumbs up sign, minus big ole smiling face of available thumbs up smilie...'cause I be all serious in this statement>

morningstar55 04-25-2010 01:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 91934)
Great, powerful post. <thumbs up sign, minus big ole smiling face of available thumbs up smilie...'cause I be all serious in this statement>

....i agree......

i also ......... really like the way . Diva put it..

Dexter_1976 04-25-2010 02:31 PM

Gday everyone,

Well im FTM for 2 years and 5 months now, yes i have so much energy and really need soulmate as for me i dont mind what woman wants as long she is happy who she is to be with, some here are very brave to date with FTM becuase FTM are the same it doesnt means that grown PENIS they are wrong cause of lack of understand or dont have much informations about those FTM, u know i began wonder why most Lesbian (i mean community) is more welcome to MTF something that i dont get it why most lesbian dont want to be with FTM, this is really frustrate me mostly and annoyed thought oh well their loss it not my problem. :violin:

Billy 04-25-2010 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness (Post 91897)
I have dated bio men and they fell flat on the sustained-attraction meter. I might have liked the way they looked but as soon as they opened their mouths or I took them out in public, the meter jumped way over to "unappealing". I am fiercely not attracted to bio men in general.

But I am attracted to FtMs. I like how Diva said its the 2 spirit thing. I know (which is different than merely believing) that FtMs are men from the get go regardless of what their undies held in. Going thru life as a male in a female body creates an incredible journey thru life. They pick up all the social nuances females are given, and while they dont claim them as their own, they are acutely aware of them in the women in their lives.I know when their eyes are on me, they see within me, not just the outside. When they draw me in sexually, they know what I am experiencing. Not because they experienced it...but because they Know about "it"..that which makes me a woman. Bio men dont have that glimpse into the femmes soul.

I also like to date FtMs because they have had to work hard at who they are. They are warriors on the inside. They are committed to themselves. I cant tell you how appalling it is to get asked out by a creepy crawler..you know the kind...the ones who lay on the basement couch watching jerry springer and eating orange food (cheese whiz and cheetos) ...creepy crawlers are almost always bio men gone bad. Not all bio men are bad. But there are enough of them to limit their dating pool to like 1%. FtMs, however, are their own knights in shining armours. They have battled the culture, their family, their religions, the LGBT world, their partners, their job related people and the neighbors next door. You have to admire the hell out of them on this alone. And I like dating FtMs because of the magic. Alchemy. Changing something entirely to create something else. And because they work so hard on it, damn they sure look good! I dont want to single anyone out but yeah, I will. Bo is a prime example of what I am talking about. I have watched from afar his transition and I got to tell you, he is a handsome man...incredibly handsome man. Some woman is going to be very lucky to get him as a partner. He is invested in himself without the narcissitic privelaged personality bio men culturally inherit.

I have dated a few FtMs. And I would again. I have dated some butches who really wanted to transition but felt unable to. How sad for them....I still hope they will someday.

One other thing about dating an FtM...the ones I have dated were very schooled in dating ettiquette. I had my doors opened for me, flowers sent, lovely little suprises left for me, good nite phone calls where they sung me to sleep....it was magical because they were such good daters! They knew how to be the gentleman to my gentle lady that I am...

This is awesome thank you for sharing this :)

DapperButch 04-25-2010 05:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by morningstar55 (Post 91955)
....i agree......

i also ......... really like the way . Diva put it..


Well, YEAH...but that kind of goes without saying....we are talking about THE Diva here...lol :tease:

WheelieStrong 04-28-2010 10:16 AM

i'm attracted to masculinity, which i think is hormonal, before T i was mainly into fairly femme girls i guess
i still appreciate an attractive woman in all forms but it's not the same as wanting to be with her.
i've spent most of my adult life avoiding women because every woman i have found remotely attractive has been a lesbians so there would be no hope for me.

i think initially, i am no more attracted to a guy who's ftm than i am a bio guy, physically i tend to work with whatever is put in front of me if i like the person, but i think somehow there is more potential for a stronger emotional bond when i am with another transman.
i wouldn't say all transguys are more tender and loving but there is a very high percentage that seem to be highly tender and intimate lovers, from my experience and what i hear from others

i hope i made sense

femmebaker 04-28-2010 10:37 AM

It's a very interesting question, one that seems to have as many answers as people answering it. I've take to identifying as bi, not because I like manly men and girly girls, but because I love the sensitive, intellectual breed of masculinity that technically straddles the gender divide. For me, FTMs are the ultimate embodiment of this. There is an intentionality that is a fundamental part of being FTM that is beyond hot :drool:


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