Butch Femme Planet - All Things Texas...(and Southern)

Butch Femme Planet (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/index.php)

- The Fluffy Stuff: Flirting, Humor, Chat (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=17)

- - All Things Texas...(and Southern) (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1308)

All Things Texas...(and Southern)

==================================================
TEXAS HAS IT ALL

Feeling a litle Down?- Why not Visit
Smiley , Texas 78159
Paradise , Texas 76073
Rainbow , Texas 76077
Sweet Home , Texas 77987
Comfort , Texas 78013
Friendship, Texas 76530

Love the Sun?
Sun City , Texas 78628
Sunrise , Texas 76661
Sunset, Texas 76270
Sundown, Texas 79372
Sunray , Texas 79086
Sunny Side , Texas 77423

Want something to eat?
Bacon , Texas 76301
Noodle , Texas 79536
Oatmeal , Texas 78605
Turkey , Texas 79261
Trout , Texas 75789
Sugar Land , Texas 77479
Salty, Texas 76567
Rice , Texas 75155
Pearland , Texas 77581
Orange , Texas 77630
And top it off with:
Sweetwater , Texas 79556

Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!
Detroit , Texas 75436
Cleveland , Texas 75436
Colorado City , Texas 79512
Denver City , Texas 79323
Klondike , Texas 75448
Nevada , Texas 75173
Memphis , Texas 79245
Miami , Texas 79059
Boston , Texas 75570
Santa Fe , Texas 77517
Tennessee Colony , Texas 75861
Reno , Texas 75462
Pasadena , Texas 77506
Columbus , Texas 78934
Feel like traveling outside the country?
Athens , Texas 75751
Canadian, Texas 79014
China , Texas 77613
Egypt , Texas 77436
Ireland , Texas 76538
Italy , Texas 76538
Turkey , Texas 79261
London , Texas 76854
New London , Texas 75682
Paris , Texas 75460
Palestine , Texas 75801

No need to travel to Washington D.C.
Whitehouse , Texas 75791

We even have a city named after our planet!
Earth , Texas 79031
We have a city named after our state
Texas City , Texas 77590

Exhausted?
Energy , Texas 76452
Pep , Texas 79353

Cold?
Blanket , Texas 76432
Winters, Texas

Like to read about History?
Santa Anna , Texas
Goliad , Texas
Alamo , Texas
Gun Barrel City , Texas
Robert Lee , Texas

Need Office Supplies?
Staples, Texas 78670

Want to go into outer space?
Venus , Texas 76084
Mars , Texas 79062

You guessed it. It's on the state line.
Texline , Texas 79087

For the kids...
Kermit , Texas 79745
Elmo , Texas 75118
Nemo , Texas 76070
Tarzan , Texas 79783
Winnie , Texas 77665
Sylvester , Texas 79560

Other city names in Texas , to make you smile.......
Frognot , Texas 75424
Bigfoot , Texas 78005
Hogeye , Texas 75423
Cactus , Texas 79013
Notrees , Texas 79759
Best, Texas 76932
Veribest , Texas 76886
Kickapoo , Texas 75763
Dime Box , Texas 77853
Old Dime Box , Texas 77853
Telephone , Texas 75488
Telegraph , Texas 76883
Whiteface , Texas 79379
Twitty, Texas 79079

And last but not least, the Anti-Al Gore City
Kilgore , Texas 75662

And our favorites...
Cut n Shoot, Texas
Gun Barrell City , Texas
Hoop And Holler, Texas
Ding Dong, Texas and, of course,
Muleshoe , Texas

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas ...

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas ;

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas ;

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas ;

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas ;

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas ;

If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas ..

Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas .
1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles
2.. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles
3... El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas
4.. World's first rodeo was in Pecos , July 4, 1883.
5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water. Destroyed by Hurricane Ike -2008!
6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston ..
7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America
8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes...
9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.
10. The worst natural disaster in U.S. history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island .
11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20,1969, was " Houston ," but the space center was actually in Clear Lake City at the time.
12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island ...
13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43" in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979...
14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.
15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.
16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.
17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper..
18. Texas has had six capital cities:
Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg , Galveston ,Velasco, West Columbia and Austin ..
19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U..S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).
20. The San Jacinto Monument is the tallest free standing monument in the world and it is taller than the Washington monument.
21. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas ..
22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies.. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.).
23. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston .

Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie , Texas :
(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin' before God.
(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.
(7) No killin'.
(8) Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don't take what ain't yers.
(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.

Y'all git all that?

With love from your friend…..a Texan.

I love this list more than chicken fried steak at Hoover's.

More than gingerbread pancakes at Kerbey Lane Cafe.

More than Mexican Martini's at Trudy's.......

Wait.

Dont forget Merry christmas Texas,its not far from the state line.

GRIT (Girls Raised In Texas )

Someone once noted that a Texan can get away with the most awful kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her heart" or "Bless his heart." As in, "Bless his heart, if they put his brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll around like a BB on a 6-lane highway."

I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was telling about her new transplanted northern friend who was upset because her toddler is just beginning to talk and he has a Texas accent. My friend, who is very kind and, bless her heart, cannot do a thing about those thighs of hers, was justifiably miffed about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to move to Texas a couple of years ago.

"Can you believe it?" said her friend, "A child of mine is going to be "taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."

Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the North, bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their friendships, and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian food. I've even gotten past their endless complaints that you can't find good bread down here. And the heathens, bless their hearts, don't like cornbread!

I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks it's hilarious when I say I've got to "carry" my daughter to the doctor or "cut off" the light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin" to do something. And, bless their hearts, they don't even know where "over yonder" is, or what "I reckon" means!

My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, "Bless her heart, she cain't help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home."

Texas girls know bad manners when they see them:
1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after
Labor Day.

Texas girls always say:
1. "Yes Maam."
2. "Yessir."

Texas girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
1. "Yawl come back."
2. "Well, bless yer harrt."
3. "Drop by when ya can."
4. "How's yer mama?"
5. "Love yer hair."

Texas girls know their three R's:
1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest
Texas girls know everybody's first name:
1. Hunny
2. Darlin'
3. Shuger

Texas girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. "Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"

Texas girls know the three deadly sins:
1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates

G.R.I.T. = Girls Raised in Texas !

Remember, Just because you move to Texas does not make you a Texan. After all, if a cat had kittens and moved them to the oven, that wouldn't make them biscuits."

Just sortta makes your eyes mist up don't it? :stillheart:

________________________________________

Thangs a Texas Cowboy Knows

1. Don’t pee off the front porch during the day. But if ya can’t wait and a neighbor drives be sure to wave.

2. Never draw unless your prepared to fire.

3. A smile in a cowboy hat can get ya out of most trouble and into all sorts.

4. Cold beer stays colder in red cooler

5. Those fancy scrubby thangs in the shower are not for ya to touch. But it’s ok to sniff em.

6. Shooting bottles from the hot tub is considered a sport.

7. Your horse chooses you.

8. A lady is always right. They know all about everythang from a meat loaf to a bush hog. Just say “Yes, ma’am” and go about your business.

Never ask a cowboy if he's from Texas. If he is, he'll tell ya on his own.
If he ain't, No need to embarrass him.

My Momma was a Texan. I spent about 3 years in Texas with a wonderful girl. I never felt more at home than in Texas. I am die hard Longhorns fan. I bleed burnt orange. Most of my family lives in Texas!!! I think that makes me Texan by god!!!

ROFLMAO

I was born and raised in TX

I soooooooooooo understand all of this

Quote:

Originally Posted by DamonK (Post 109255)

ROFLMAO

I was born and raised in TX

I soooooooooooo understand all of this

I wasn't.......and I still do.

*grin*

Mississsssssippi ain't so different, yanno.

It's all in the breeding.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaqueline (Post 99275)

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas.

seriously! you can drive two hours and still be making local calls

This thread is darling!

Thank you Jaqueline! :rrose:

Love, Shug--(heh heh short for sugar)

omg this was perfect.. ty for starting this thread

Early voting has started y'all. :)

THank you for this - so many people believe Texans are ALL a bunch of racist rednecks...and there certainly are some AS WITH EVERYWHERE....but there are a lot of good people here that will defend your right to be who you are....

I love Texas <3

Photos taken from central Texas fires 9/4/11-9/5/11

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/..._389975977.jpg
71 West near Paleface Rd.

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...s_9-5-2011.jpg
This picture was taken on Loop 360 (Austin) at Lost Creek Boulevard.

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...7300_photo.JPG
Smoke at Lucky Stars Ranch near Rosanky.

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/..._spicewood.jpg
Spicewood along the Pedernales River

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...55091_lott.JPG
"Approx 1:15p, from Delta over what I believe to be Bastrop Co"

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...shalaine_1.jpg
"Detour to Smithville yesterday on our way to Magnolia."

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...calebmarsh.jpg

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...e_2011_019.jpg
(photo location not identified on the above)

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...0_IMG_7083.jpg http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...0_IMG_7051.jpg
pictures taken "after being
evacuated from Bastrop state park today around 3:30pm. The park was
engulfed in flames about 30 minutes after we were evacuated."

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...0050_photo.JPG
From across Balcones preserve, looking at Steiner Ranch area.

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...0_DSC_7477.JPG
These photos show the smoke from the fires near Bastrop, as seen from Main St., Smithville

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/...54651_rszh.jpg
Taken from the Delhi area.

You see more Texan flags than American flags.

People wonder, when Jesus fed 5,000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish.

You can drive all day and not leave the state

My Mother was born in Turkey, Texas.

a bit of trivia....the play Greater Tuna is really about Turkey. Some of those characters sure act like some of my relatives..........:| Petey Fisk is my favorite.