Cause & Affect: A Femme's Influence On The Friendships Between Butches and Transmen
 

I don't think this will be an easy conversation, hell it may be a hard one but I do feel one that must be had. I also felt it needed to be out of the thread that AtlastHome made, yes I am aware it includes everyone, yet I feel if femme's go in there it will change it due to sometimes it turns into a pick up zone or flirt zone. This is a thread that can do some good hence the start of this one. I am also aware I may get my ass handed to me.

*deep breath*

How do we support in the building of friendships between the butches and transmen in our community?

I hope we can be honest and transparent in this convo.

I don't think that anyone should, um, handle your arse, Lady Snow. just saying (I've caught myself agreeing with you of late) ... I think that it's a idea good to have a "butch/transmen only" thread (even though AtLast invited everyone ...) it seems to me, in my limited time and experiences here, that when femmes enter, our dynamics shift or change somewhat. And no, I'm too tired to give examples. 'sides, it is always a "feeling" that I have when reading posts. Nuanced ...

And yes, we should also have this discussion open and here ... and as well as having Atlast's or another thread as a place, a zone, where butch/transmen, etc. can bond and talk ... it has already done a good thing for me ... I have new friends!

I just reread this and I'm not sure that I've made a lick of sense ... it's time for my pup's walk!

Hi, Lady Snow!
Are you asking this question to femmes or to butches and transmen? Or is it an open question for both groups?

I felt it could be a place for anyone other than butch or transmen to have this convo here instead of AtLastHome's thread...

I could be wrong. Thought I would give it a go though

I'm struggling to come up with a response to this thread.

I have answers and they are not popular.

I have to wonder if sometimes Femmes don't benefit from building fences rather than bridges. Why? Because then we get to go in and cheerlead and champion and nurture.

I am fully aware that some thoughts and opinions that will be expressed here will not be popular ones...

I am not ashamed to say I have done nothing to stop this as I watch it happen or hear it or see it.

I sit back and do nothing or keep quiet so I am not the constant cunt.

Today I am ok with that, and yes SF I do feel we femmes cause A LOT of tall fences when it comes to dividing these two groups.

NOT all femme's, but some of us do.

You realize your idea of play dates and my idea of play dates are probably totally the opposite...

:praying:

:|:|:|:|:|

oh! sorry, I misinterpreted your intent. this, then, is a thread for femmes, right. I'll just read respectfully and keep to the other thread then.
Thanks for clarifying ...

I just figured you would want the space in the other thread...

I was not sure how to handle it, I am ok if you are here, if everyone else is.

I always thought it was cool that the UK butch femme transguy site has

and

Because I think there are potentially times when people of different identities may need a bit of sanctuary while working stuff out about their/our IDs.

I have no objections but I haven't read the other thread :) I find the subject of this thread to be very compelling as a stand-alone and I'm very much looking forward to reading it.

No really.

Do you know what I am talking about?

There will be a subject/space and all of a sudden a Femme will start speaking and/or translating for a butch/trans person.

Telling the rest of the thread what the butch/trans person really meant and what they intended to say.

I find it very strange when this happens, because there seems to be a lot of gratitude.

In fact I feel kind of shitty for speaking about it right now.

Like my pompoms are gonna burn.

So let's grab this topic by the balls and discuss it.

I have experienced it and seen it the one minute we date a butch then we date a transperson.

We are bitter after the break up and we dog the other gender presentation to make us feel good.

Example:

Mariano was so abusive, he would scream in my ear and I would be terrorized cause you know he is on *whispering* T

or

Kelly was so not butch, she wanted me to go down on her YUCK, not like Marianno who is a real mans man.

(Marianno and Kelly are fictional characters)

Yes....

Someone I know calls it....

Lemme think of the word

Placating

I agree

It is really oogey

I have never ever seen a real live case of this so called rhoid rage.

I HAVE seen the gender tear down, and it's ugly.

Abuse, screaming and rage is always a stereotype foe Anyone that dates a transguy, because they always use T as an excuse.

Not every transguy experiences the same side effects from T. I get one side effect, after my shot i usually get a headache. Same thing after 3 years on T, oh little bit of led foot too

i know im not suppose to be here, but i get what your saying. squeeze the balls harder

So I gotta ask

WTF with the balls comment?

Topic by the balls, squeeze the topic. nothing personal. scooting out of here.

I am gonna clean my answer up because I don't like giving June a headache..

So lemme make it clear ok?

You and I, ain't homies, we ain't tight...

So, those kinda of comments, keep em to yourself a'ight?

Thank you for listening.