I understand you were speaking to your good buddy... and I'm not asking anything Kam, as a moderator of this forum I was speaking to you about your post I felt was inflammatory to the immediate situation at the time you made it... specifically these lines...

You may have been speaking to your good buddy... but you were speaking about "they they they".. so your comments were hardly limited to him.

If you have any further questions about this feel free to PM me, and as I said allow this thread to get back to it's original intention.

Metropolis

Jet - You remember how I told you that I got up to 210 or so at one time, I carried the weight ok, but, had always been around 160 or so and decided to diet? And, BTW - I read an article recently where exercise has little to do with weight loss... what do you think about that? When I lost the 1 - 2 1/2 pounds each week for a year to get back to where I had been for years, exercise was not a part of the weight loss program.

It's all in what you eat and when. I incorporated a "modified-Atkins" as I call it - it worked for me. You have to cut back on the carbs to send the body into the fat reserves. I drank a 1 carb shake for breakfast, not all the time but some of the time, my biggest carb meal for lunch and more protein than carbs at night... and any of the non-carb foods anytime that I wanted to.

There's even this guy who has a diet out now that I think should work too, where you eat low carbs two days on and on the third day you eat what you want to. Losing weight is a slow and gradual process, if you do it too quickly, it's a shock to the body and painful - once you start steadily going into the fat reserves, the body gets used to it and accepts it.

I know you started a special diet a while back, Jet... tell us about it?

Well, the first thing that I think is blowing my dieting are my PTSD meds, the side effects are weight gain— BIG TIME. Secondly, I know my my cortisol is out of control. The reason I hit the weights more now is because muscle "eats" fat if you will. So everything is in conjunction with everything else, yanno? I'm not giving up, but I really think I need a doc's advice on some things. And I totally agree with your diet which is why I've gradually cut my carbs way down.

When you told me what you were eating... I knew you were headed for trouble, but - what can we do but be supportive, you were 'hot to trot' on this new diet... and I'm not the type to say... 'I told ya' so!'

You've got to eat 1 piece of bread a day and that's it - in the bread department, I remember that much... and very little sugar, and eat the pasta for lunch... and it'll hurt like hell - your body will think you're starving and hold onto your fat reserves for the first week or so... and then it starts accelerating when it gets used to the fact that your aren't dying afterall... lol

You have to look at genetics too... I had a tall, skinny father, and my brother who is 10 years older is all lean... but, me and my sister look like football players.

So, are your meds making you want to eat more?

not feelin' the love
 

This is less like "Big Butch Love" and more like "Butch Fat Panic".
Not feelin' the love, yo.
:crybaby:

Well... there are other threads... do you have any 'love' to contribute or just driving by to shoot, Cyclopea?

All:

Folks need to stop picking at each other and engage with one another thoughtfully.

I know this thread is a difficult subject, especially when, clearly, we are all not at the same point in our journey. We are all going to have to recognize this in order to coexist.

Fat is a touchy subject because some folks turn it inward. It becomes self-hatred, something to be excised, worked out, exorcised even.
For others, fat isnt evil or ugly. It is just a part of their existence.

It is often very button-pushing for folks who dont have a problem with their body size to see other folks having a problem with their own body size. Especially if they are fat.
It pushes buttons because it says to them "Well hell, if they hate their OWN fat that much, what do they think of mine?"

This is one angle to consider. Not the only angle.

I also want to say that this thread is entitled "Big Butch Love". I suggest that we all need to find positive ways to show love for Big Butches.

There is a great amount of support for Big Butches to be found in this community. Let's make sure we are seeking support in ways that dont hurt. Learning to love yourself is a journey and it is often scary. Tell the truth and reach out...and be kind when doing so.

On a final note, we have had multiple reported posts from this thread tonight. I want everyone to TALK to one another. Stop sniping. Stop shutting down. And stop thinking you have all of the answers.

Much Love,
Admin

Yes, I have plenty of love to contribute. I try to love my body - or as someone said geniusly somewhere "my earth vessel" for all it's flaws and foibles. I thought that's what this thread was for. There are plenty of threads and venues on this site for weight loss support. The title of this thread "Big Butch Love" promises enjoyment and acceptance of the bigger butch. Perhaps even a place for those who enjoy a big butch. All this talk about desperately needing to diet for butches who are moderately chubby? Not at all the same as loving big butches. Does that make sense?

Gawd I wub you Cyclo :):aslIloveyou:

It makes perfect sense. But my discomfort over my weight issue does equate or apply to someone else. My weight is NOT OKAY with me; it's costing me money for new clothes and something is wrong medically that needs to be addressed. These are valid points in my life, not yours[/U] and I resent the comment fat panick when it could be a health issue at 53. I'm entitled to set standards for my life and my body, alone, no one else's. The thread was started to see how butches might see, feel and express themselves as butches on the subject of weight. And yeah, I am positive for them no matter what they look like. Weight, looks and other surface noise would never enter into a friendship with them or treat them in any manner that made anyone feel "less than". But having been made to feel that way today myself, I'll step out and leave this thread to y'all who are supportive and loving towards big butches.

MMMMMMMMMM
 

Just dropping by to give a shout out to all those yummy and delish Butches of more than average proportions... not that I don't like slimmer Butches but there is nothing more comforting than being wrapped up and sheltered in the arms of ... well, yanno :eyebat:

Yes, I'm sorry, Cyclopea... I didn't realize you thought the thread theme was supposed to be carried out in a specific and certain way... you're absolutely right. I think I'll bow out too, maybe there's a coloring book in the Arcade that allows us to color outside the lines?

My intent is not to attack you. And I should have tread more gently entering a thread where you already felt defensive. I respect your feelings and your weight loss and health needs. I think the dissonance started with the title of the thread which promised enjoyment and acceptance of big butches. In that regard, striving to be different than as one is, rather than to be loved as one is, is in disagreement with the title of the thread. I hope that makes sense. Again, no disrespect was intended to you, and I apologize for posting bluntly. I wish you the best, and hey, maybe if some Big Butch Appreciation follows this rocky start, it may be healthy for even moderately chubby butches who are freaked and despairing at age related or other changes, to see that some appreciate them just how they are.
Thank you for listening.
I am butch, btw. But generally Butch Love-ers come in all stripes.

Thank you darling!
:heartbeat:

Mmm me too Kate. I love them fluffy bois :)

Your post is welcomed and accepted and I'd like to shake hands on it in our respect and words toward one another. Thanks.

Well TD, I'm about ready to post a pic from december and they suck. About clothes, I struggle...dress clothes for my work are expensive, or they can be and it's disheartening to buy clothes and find a month later I can't wear them. It's rapid weight gain and I'm concerned. I'd like to throw on a pair of bib overalls and be done with it, but i can't corporate style.
Thanks for participating in the thread.