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-   -   Away with the rich, to home with the poor? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3834)

Chromeplatedbutch 09-12-2011 08:38 AM

Away with the rich, to home with the poor?
 
Ok Guys and Girls, I have a very complicated decision to make and I am trying to figure out what's best. I own my own business you could say. I travel a lot, usually home on the weeeknds. I've been home since Tuesday now, but only because Im here for my partner as she's having surgery as Im writing this.

I make on average $1500-2400 a week. We have plenty of money for bills and plenty to have for backup, ect....

My partner wants me to to sell it, and get a job to where Im home everyday. At most Id make $750 a week, but that's given I can even get a job like that working for FedEx or UPS or something like that.

My biggest thing is that as much as I want to be home, and as much as she wants me to be home, I dont think we'd financially survive? I think I should keep doing what Im doing for a few years at least, and then think about it. It's SO complicated. I want to be home all the time. I just feel like its not possible right now...is it wrong of me to want to keep my current business just because Im worried about money?

I need thoughts ya'll....PLEASE......:praying:

Chrome

apretty 09-12-2011 08:42 AM

Is there some way that she can travel with you? Do you two have kids? If you have kids then you probably should be home more often, if not figure out a way for her to be with you more.

LaneyDoll 09-12-2011 08:45 AM

You say that you think you will make $750/week? Why not try living on that for a few months and seeing how it affects you both? Kind of test the waters a bit :)

:sparklyheart:

ruffryder 09-12-2011 08:49 AM

I don't have all the answers as I'm not sure of all your financial obligations. Can you take some time away now and then as you are now? Can you hire someone else to pull some of the weight so you can spend more time at home and still keep your profession and business? I think you need to look at your financial obligations and see what you can afford to do. Possibly you need to set some goals to get away from it and make plans, this may include letting some things go that wouldn't be as important as being in a relationship. You mentioned you can sell your business; Have you considered the price on it and would it allow you to still live comfortably. Just some thoughts and thinking you need to think about short and long term goals when it comes to financing, money and the relationship. Thanks for posting here. I hope people offer you some insight into your situation. Good luck.

Chromeplatedbutch 09-12-2011 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by apretty (Post 416435)
Is there some way that she can travel with you? Do you two have kids? If you have kids then you probably should be home more often, if not figure out a way for her to be with you more.

we used to travel together, last september her son came to live with us..so we are still adjusting to the different lifestyle we are living now.

He is 13.

Chromeplatedbutch 09-12-2011 08:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruffryder_0187 (Post 416441)
I don't have all the answers as I'm not sure of all your financial obligations. Can you take some time away now and then as you are now? Can you hire someone else to pull some of the weight so you can spend more time at home and still keep your profession and business? I think you need to look at your financial obligations and see what you can afford to do. Possibly you need to set some goals to get away from it and make plans, this may include letting some things go that wouldn't be as important as being in a relationship. You mentioned you can sell your business; Have you considered the price on it and would it allow you to still live comfortably. Just some thoughts and thinking you need to think about short and long term goals when it comes to financing, money and the relationship. Thanks for posting here. I hope people offer you some insight into your situation. Good luck.

Luckily, we dont have an extra bills that most people have. Car and truck is paid off...just the usual like a lot of people do..no credit cards..just a few payments relating to the business. I've more into it than I would get back, so I'm not sure about that right now either. We've also talked about after she recovers form her surgery the option of her working as well, and I could change it to where I could be home more without selling it, because I wouldnt have to rely strictly on my income alone.:seeingstars:

The_Lady_Snow 09-12-2011 09:09 AM

Honestly we could give you advice till the cows come home, reality is it's something you and her have to do TOGETHER cause well... The relationship is between you and her cause it's you and her all these things will affect. Good luck:)

SoNotHer 09-12-2011 09:09 AM

Hobson's Choice?
 
Well you're talking about cutting your income in at least half. So do you have a nest egg or can you trim your spending by at least half without affecting the quality of your life and while still allowing for unforeseen expenses?

I think you've had a couple good suggestions to 1) see how you do survive on $750 and 2) travel together. I realize you now have a 13 year old in the house, so the second might not work or may need to be worked around.

Personally, my instinct in this economy is to hold onto what works. I don't see a lot of second chances right now, and I have friends and students who have been looking for good work for some time.

Glenn 09-12-2011 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chromeplatedbutch (Post 416444)
We've also talked about after she recovers form her surgery the option of her working as well, and I could change it to where I could be home more without selling it, because I wouldnt have to rely strictly on my income alone.:seeingstars:

This idea may be doable, but if she can't/won't find work, then I'd tell HER to find something better and move out. Congratulations on your success in your business!

The_Lady_Snow 09-12-2011 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chromeplatedbutch (Post 416444)
Luckily, we dont have an extra bills that most people have. Car and truck is paid off...just the usual like a lot of people do..no credit cards..just a few payments relating to the business. I've more into it than I would get back, so I'm not sure about that right now either. We've also talked about after she recovers form her surgery the option of her working as well, and I could change it to where I could be home more without selling it, because I wouldnt have to rely strictly on my income alone.:seeingstars:



Yanno you both could look at it this way:

You make in a week what some do in a month. You both may wanna look around at what you have and be grateful and glad you make what you do in this economy..

SoNotHer 09-12-2011 09:39 AM

What Lady Snow said :-)

princessbelle 09-12-2011 09:41 AM

My advice would be sit down and make a budget. See where it will leave you financially if you make this move.

If you can make it, i'd say go for it. If you can't, maybe save more for awhile and get a nice nest egg to live off of while you adjust and pay off as many bills as you can.

Before i went to college i made very little money and made it just fine. Now that i make more money, i still try and live modestly. All the money in the world won't make you feel secure if you have more going out than coming in.

Budget budget budget. Set your priorities on paper, the pros and the cons...including time together. See where you are at that point.

But above all, as others have said, make sure you have excellent communication. Don't let resentments grow...for either of you.


Good luck.

Bella~Vita 09-12-2011 10:10 AM

Sometimes sacrifices have to be made to secure a netful gain for ones future. I agree people are out of work, I think maybe you two should sit down and look at things realistically. It's nice to be home and all lovey dovey but in the end love doesn't pay the bills. I'm an old hag but this is my opinion ...lol.

Waldo 09-12-2011 10:39 AM

Taking into account that you live in Kentucky...

I know people living in Los Angeles with car & student loan payments who are earning around $40k (what you say you might be able to earn if you worked locally).

Of course you COULD do it. The question is likely more about whether you want to make the lifestyle adjustments necessary, no?

JAGG 09-12-2011 10:58 AM

2 cents worth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Chromeplatedbutch (Post 416444)
Luckily, we dont have an extra bills that most people have. Car and truck is paid off...just the usual like a lot of people do..no credit cards..just a few payments relating to the business. I've more into it than I would get back, so I'm not sure about that right now either. We've also talked about after she recovers form her surgery the option of her working as well, and I could change it to where I could be home more without selling it, because I wouldnt have to rely strictly on my income alone.:seeingstars:

Here is my 2 cents worth. A "partner" who is unemployed and wants me to quit my good paying job, for whatever reason, goes against my better judgement!!! If she got a job not just talked about. If she got a job started saving and showing me she really wanted me home, and would be willing to help so I could make the sacrifice, I'd do it in a heartbeat. But just talking about getting a job etc or wanting her cake and eat it too, forget it. That is a train wreck on the way to happen. My opinion.

BullDog 09-12-2011 10:58 AM

I don't know what type of business you have to know if it's feasible, but I'm with Ruffryder, I would look to see if you could hire employees or get a business partner to reduce time spent on road if you are able to still bring in some good income doing that. Having a successful business is no easy feat and being gainfully employed in this economy isn't easy either, so I would try to hold onto the business in some form if you possibly can.

Julie 09-12-2011 12:09 PM

I have read this post over and over again and read the responses.
Honestly -
Can anyone really give you advice on this?

Unless you are willing to post your monthly expenses (including extras/food/etc). And ask one of our more financially wise members to see if it is feasible, based on $750 a week and create a budget for you -- I don't really think you can get your answers.

Only you know what your expenses are and if you can live on this.
If you know you can and you are okay with making personal sacrifices, such as those extras (eating out, etc.) again, that's so personal. You and your partner know what you're willing to give up.

I remember when I was MUCH YOUNGER and making a LARGE income (Human Resource Director). I chose to give up my career to stay home and raise babies. I did create a working environment for myself, so I could stay home by cutting my salary 2/3's *huge*. This included giving up my expensive lifestyle and completely altering my way of life. It was worth it to me - I raised my kids. And I struggled and sometimes I could barely put food on the table - but my kids always ate and had what they needed.

Not everybody can do this - not everybody is willing to give up the extras. Are you willing?

Julie

DapperButch 09-12-2011 12:44 PM

My first thought when I read your post was, 'That would be utterly insane to do'. Then I read some of the posts and thought, well, those are good thoughts and those are good thoughts, and....

But, I have pretty much come back to thinking it is insane.

Well, not really, but...

I looked at your picture, you are quite young. If you were 60 years old and close to retirement, that is one thing. As BullDog said, creating a successful business is no easy feat. Do you think you would be able to do it again if things changed in your life? And let me ask you this, if the relationship ended, would you regret having sold your business?

Now, if you said that you had a nest egg large enough that you could be confident with the right investing it would be enough for you/your family's retirement, or if you said that what you can get for the business will grow to meet your retirement needs, I'd say go for it. If you can't say that, I would pause.

There are a lot of sources where you can pull up financial calculators to look at various scenarios. I would consider doing that. Make sure when you do that you also run the numbers as to what age you could retire based on the amount of money you could start investing right now versus the amount you could invest if you went with your "new salary". Bet it is about 12-15+ years earlier (but, I am guessing at your age here).

Just my 2, harsh cents.

P.S. I think for me the big thing is that it is your own business. It is not like you can decide that the lower salary doesn't work for you and you can go back out and get another job making that same amount. It is your own business. Go the route of hiring someone or just simply cut back on the business you are doing.

P.P.S. Bottom line, though, you need to have a happy home life. Just don't make a change that will risk the financial future of both you and your family, based on your partner's desires at this moment in time.

Good luck.

Greyson 09-12-2011 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chromeplatedbutch (Post 416433)
Ok Guys and Girls, I have a very complicated decision to make and I am trying to figure out what's best. I own my own business you could say. I travel a lot, usually home on the weeeknds. I've been home since Tuesday now, but only because Im here for my partner as she's having surgery as Im writing this.

I make on average $1500-2400 a week. We have plenty of money for bills and plenty to have for backup, ect....

My partner wants me to to sell it, and get a job to where Im home everyday. At most Id make $750 a week, but that's given I can even get a job like that working for FedEx or UPS or something like that.

My biggest thing is that as much as I want to be home, and as much as she wants me to be home, I dont think we'd financially survive? I think I should keep doing what Im doing for a few years at least, and then think about it. It's SO complicated. I want to be home all the time. I just feel like its not possible right now...is it wrong of me to want to keep my current business just because Im worried about money?

I need thoughts ya'll....PLEASE......:praying:

Chrome


Chrome, you have pretty much been given enough advice. So, I will not give a rehash. However, I am really curious as to what kind of business you have. If you don't mind telling us, I would really like to hear about it.

I think about the day when I can retire from this secure, adequate paying career and move on in my life. I do not want to retire full time. I would like to do something that I really care about and make an income that would supplement my retirement. I am the sort of person that needs structure and a job, mission of some sort, provides that for me.

Good luck on whatever you and your partner may decide.

Chromeplatedbutch 09-12-2011 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greyson (Post 416582)
Chrome, you have pretty much been given enough advice. So, I will not give a rehash. However, I am really curious as to what kind of business you have. If you don't mind telling us, I would really like to hear about it.

I think about the day when I can retire from this secure, adequate paying career and move on in my life. I do not want to retire full time. I would like to do something that I really care about and make an income that would supplement my retirement. I am the sort of person that needs structure and a job, mission of some sort, provides that for me.

Good luck on whatever you and your partner may decide.

I have my own trucking business.... I drive. I am not in debt with anything. None of my equipment isnt paid off. So, if I were to sell, I'd get probably $25,000 at the most...being I've put probably $50,000 into it since 2007. Ive thought about hiring someone to drive for me, but I've been thru that once and it was a disaster. I had 4 trucks, sold 3 now I'm down to just this one. But when I put drivers in trucks, it was always somethinng. 4am phone call, " Im stuck in the ditch, need a tow truck. ($450 at least)" or I just ran over a nail and blew a tire ($400 for one tire). If you get a good driver, you're lucky. I just haven't found one yet. I like what I do. I like the $$$ I make. But like everyone has said, if I can save the $$$ that I make now and invest it, I can retire early. If I get the lower paying job and make the lower end, I cant save as much BUT I also wont have as many expenses. License plates are $1550 a year, repairs are outrageous, traffic is HORRIBLE. But by the end of the week, I'm proud to be 29 years old and have my own business. I have a great company that backs me 100%. that I haul freight for. I paid my truck off last year....This year we went on Vacation for the first time in 7 years...and it felt so GREAT to be able to do that.

We could live on $750 a week with no problem. I'd just like to take this oppurtunity that I've been given to make the best out of it. I also get to go visit my grandmother who raised me anytime I want who lives 800 miles away in DALLAS.

I went to 3 years of college at WKU for Nursing/criminology. If I could save up money NOW, maybe in a few years I can finish my college and do what Ive always wanted to do.

I could go on and on but I dont wanna bore everyone LOL


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