Horrible Holiday Dishes!!!!
 

Hello friends, frenemies, and other assorted sundries. As some of you may know, I am a bit of a :grinch: when it comes to holidays. They take up too much time, expand my waistline, cause family fights, cost too much, the list goes on and on!

That being said, I do participate in most of them mostly due to the fact that I can be a spineless pushover who can't say no. So with that in mind I would like to give all of you an opportunity to post your worst holiday food experiences. Does Aunt Millie always make that gloppy green bean casserole no one can stand (yet no one tells her how gross it is so she brings year after year)......what about the upside down jello thing your sister makes that tastes putrid.....does your mother-in-law burn everything so it's beyond recognition but insists on saying "it's just a little crispy"?? How about the horrible brick-hard fruit cakes your girl makes every year and gives them out as "gifts" aka door stops.....

Post your horror stories here please, I'm dying to know I'm not the only one about to suffer as we approach Thanksgiving and the other holidays. I do a lot of the cooking now just so I won't be subjected to things I can't stomach, but my sister who is a horrible cook, will bring something (?) to share, at least now she will admit cooking not her strong suit. My mother has dropped (and served us) a turkey that fell on the floor! TRUE! Ahh the holidays. So many good times!!!



http://fromthebrit.com/poems-and-rim...redturkey1.jpg

But, one thing stands out to me. My Aunt Billy makes this dish every single year...it is jello, cottage cheese, fruit, and not sure what else is in it, i just call it Jello Shyt. It has always amused her that i call it that and she is always asking me to try it. Ummm. no.



What is it about Jello that people have to add strange things to it? My mom used to make green Jello with shredded cabbage and carrots in it......NASTY!
:seeingstars:

Oh I have a good story. My dad always cooked the big Sunday and holiday meals. He was a great chef BTW. I was about 8yrs old or so, and was tasked with helping him. As instructed, I opened the can of cranberry sauce and put it on a plate. But there was some thing embedded in the sauce. So my dad pulled it out and it was a 1 inch long top part of a man's thumb . Minus the nail. My dad told me to toss it all in the trash and don't breath a word of it to anyone, because it would upset my grandmother too much.

I do most of the cooking for my family during the holidays but one of my mean aunts is always on some weird diet and tends to bring things that are made with lots of artificial sweetener or oddly-made dishes inspired to keep everyone skinny.

One year, she brought a pumpkin pie made with pureed cauliflauer mixed with pumpkin sweetened with sweet and low and housed in a pork rind crust.

Not. Kidding.

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over. :|

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

Yeah, WTF is that about? I have a cousin who does that and swears by it. *shiver*

Nastiness.................
 

Ok I gotta say................what's up that NASTY green been casserole sheeeit???
(I will admit I have never ventured to even try it)

Ok I must admit the worst holiday dish I ever had was made by me. Yup I messed it up big time. LMAO

I was trying to please everyone who was coming for dinner and usually I only make a huge turkey that looks perfect and tastes better than it looks. However this one year people wanted a ham. WTF the pilgrims did not eat ham but okay fine I can handle a ham in this mix too.

I was so proud of myself got the perfect looking ham took the wrapper off put the pineapples on it and all that held in place by a tooth pick just like the cook book said.

Well the funny thing is nobody told me that a ham is double wrapped. I cooked it and it didn't smell as I thought it should. The timer went off as I was talking on the phone with my mom who could not make the trip to Florida. I pulled it out and tried to cut it. I asked my mom if ham skin is really that think I can't even cut this thing. She then asked if I took the inner wrapper off the ham.

OH MY GOSH her and I busted out laughing so hard. I slipped my knife under the edge of the plastic and sure enough I had cooked the ham in plastic.

I excused myself and ran to the grocery store and purchased an already cooked ham from the deli and passed it off as my own.

I never agreed to cook another ham after that.

So yes the worst dish in my memory is the ham that was baked in the wrapper

:seeingstars:

No kidding! I think that was taken out of a cook book called " 1001 ways to ruin a good veggie" :) it was on the same page as the yams with brown sugar, raisins and marshmallows .

well one yr my sister called herself trying to impress some dude, so she made some baked Ziti.. she thinks its her best dish *rolls eyes*... well she had us comeover as a dinner party on christmas eve and as we began to eat, I noticed it was real crunchy!! wtf its not supposed to be crunchy?.. I know something is wrong because when she cooks if you dont find her hair or somfin its a good dish lol.. I pull out glass from my mouth its bleeding and all.. and my sister is giving me the stank eye.. like "dont say shit Ri!" kinda thing.. but I was scared to keep eating.. I did SMH.
when it was over I was like WTF April and she said I dropped the dish on the floor when I took it out of the oven.. so not only was I eating glass.. it was dirty glass off the floor and so was the ziti.. its not right I tell ya..

I actually really like green bean casserole! I love the crunchy onions on top.

For more years than I can count we had Thanksgiving at one of my Aunt's houses, or at her Daughter-in-laws home. No one else was allowed to have the meal...and for probably 15 years the food was so bad we had to go home and have something to eat because the food was inedible or not enough for 30 plus people.

So we got smart...before my Mom passed away we would just say she was tired out and we had to leave...we would then go home and have our Thanksgiving, or we would go to a restuarant and have a good meal.

THIS year the meal is finally going to be at my Sister's house...good food ahead!!! Only...now we eat Vegan with no oil....sigh. I think God is getting me back for all the times I complained about uncooked/overcooked not enough/way too much gross food!