Butch Femme Planet

Butch Femme Planet (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/index.php)
-   Thinking Harder (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=134)
-   -   What Should We Do To Effect Change? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=6380)

AmazonWoman1 03-03-2013 03:12 AM

What Should We Do To Effect Change?
 
I was having a discussion with another person about how bad things appear lately & pondered but what do I do about it that will TRULY make a change.I am deeply concerned about the environment & the decreasing amount of species as well as the full out destruction of our oceans by using them as toilets & dumping sites as well as over fishing.The removal of the feminine characteristics from the balance of life has meant all out greed & looting of most countries resources without any healthy mining or eco controls or compensation occurring. I think it is due to the corruption & removal of the feminine from our societies & an over valuing of mens characteristics till they have become right to our detriment.By this I mean fairness ,compassion,kindness,loving,working for the good of the group.all of these things denote weakness.We now have rape camps in places.It is also cheaper to purchase a slave than it has EVER been.So I wanted to KNOW what exactly do we do to effect real change about these things?I thought that for the earth make her a entity like a corporation like they did with rights etc.Please share any & all ideas you have as I am truly serious.Thank you.

traumaqueen 03-03-2013 03:15 AM

...because I told you to, duh.

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 03:21 AM

Oh boy! I love this topic...

Where do you start?

1) I truly think the best way we bring about change is to change ourselves and set an example. Otherwise, we are hypocrites or worse.

“Be the change you want to see in the world.” ~ Gandhi

2) Eat sustainably.

3) Recycle, recycle, recycle.

4) Use buying power to it's fullest potential.

5) Make feminine not derogatory in your own world and mirror that to others.

Can't wait to see what others have to say!

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 03:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by traumaqueen (Post 760273)
...because I told you to, duh.

You're always hilarious and well-timed!

:formalbow:

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 03:31 AM

6) If all else fails, kill off all the current politicians/corporate CEOs and start anew!

:getout:

traumaqueen 03-03-2013 03:53 AM

In my experience... as a 'volunteerer'... I never have learned how to say no... I've found most of us tend to get stuck somewhere between a - I see the need for and want to make change, stage and an I'm actually mobilizing for change stage. I think this is why Gandhi's approach was so accurate. We sometimes forget that within and at the end of every so called 'corrupt system' are human beings. These things we want to change are not untouchable entities that exist beyond our control, or beyond our day to day.

AmazonWoman1 03-03-2013 04:59 AM

But What Do You Mean?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by traumaqueen (Post 760279)
In my experience... as a 'volunteerer'... I never have learned how to say no... I've found most of us tend to get stuck somewhere between a - I see the need for and want to make change, stage and an I'm actually mobilizing for change stage. I think this is why Gandhi's approach was so accurate. We sometimes forget that within and at the end of every so called 'corrupt system' are human beings. These things we want to change are not untouchable entities that exist beyond our control, or beyond our day to day.

So are you saying the best way to change things is to effect small changes & hope they spiral out?Won't the same problems just keep reoccurring over & over then & never cease?Is'nt that the definition of forced entropy?

Teddybear 03-03-2013 07:07 AM

I agree with a lot if what the op stated however I don't believe we have removed the feminine from our society. I think people have been told so much and by so many that showing those feelings towards things other then ppl is showing a weakness. I believe these aren't just feminine but HUMAN.

I will admit that prior to meeting ms cinn I didn't do all I could have to help the planet. She has me recycling and reusing things I would have never thought of.

I think we really need to look into technology that has been around for decades that can and DO HAVE trash to create electricity. There has been so much bad press because IMHO they pose a threat to the big power companies.

Ginger 03-03-2013 08:49 AM

It's new for me, this equating of "feminine" with eco-friendly.

I guess that means "masculine" is eco-harmful?

I don't think I accept that premise.

Who says "feminine" can't be greedy or destructive?

One early feminist writer, Robin Morgan (her poetry is laughably bad but she did make some brave points at the time), said that instead of seeing fucking as a kind of penetration, we should view it as "enclosure."

Extending that POV, feminine energy can enclose, contain, trap, and generally fuck up the environment just as effectively as masculine energy can drill, pierce, stab and otherwise damage the natural world.

Either style of "using" the environment for the user's best interest with disregard for the best interest of the environment is exploitive.

That said, I strongly support all the suggestions people have made so far in the thread: recycling, being conscious of our personal foot print, and so on.

Gráinne 03-03-2013 09:04 AM

I'm really uncomfortable with the dividing up of "masculine" and "feminine" characteristics. One isn't all bad all the time, or all good all the time.

Instead of making it about gender characteristics, which is a mightly slippery slope, let's work for the empowerment of all peoples, especially women and children. As for the environment, there are many groups out there working for just those things you mentioned.

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IslandScout (Post 760350)
It's new for me, this equating of "feminine" with eco-friendly.

I guess that means "masculine" is eco-harmful?

I don't think I accept that premise.

Who says "feminine" can't be greedy or destructive?

I totally agree, but I think our society has accepted a norm for what "masculine" and "feminine" entail, based largely on male-dominant premises that undermine the feminine aspects of life as something separate and weak. What truly encompasses masculine, at least in my mind, is not so defined by those norms. I think it depends on whose definitions you embrace. But, I think feminine can be just as destructive, definitely.

AmazonWoman1 03-03-2013 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by meridiantoo (Post 760572)
I totally agree, but I think our society has accepted a norm for what "masculine" and "feminine" entail, based largely on male-dominant premises that undermine the feminine aspects of life as something separate and weak. What truly encompasses masculine, at least in my mind, is not so defined by those norms. I think it depends on whose definitions you embrace. But, I think feminine can be just as destructive, definitely.

I myself do not believe in the concepts named masculine & feminine truly saying anything about the nature of things.I have never seen genitals on a so called mens watch nor woman's.I was trying to show how languaging characteristics labeled as so called feminine & then minimizing them causes them to be seen as negative & therefore in our mythology they are deprecated until they are punished.The same way as when we wanted to kill the Vietnamese peoples we called them names like "gook" etc to seperate them from us & to thereby make the different person acceptable to murder.The concepts of nurturing compassion etc seem to have been made negative to the point that there appears to be open war on women about birth control & rape.Some countries now regularly set up rape camps.America has never had a female leader while others have for decades.I think this trend of devaluing anything seen as feminine to where pussy & cunt are seen as offensive swear words has serious implications.Once those things have occurred the behavior changes towards people appearing to possess those characteristics.Women got the right to vote nearly 100 years after blacks & they were slaves.History repeated itself when a black male was made president over a white female.When you do that you unbalance the equation tremendously.Male/ female energy is supposed to balance each other.Neither is better nor worse.They just are.The fact it has become so unbalanced is the problem.Entitlement comes from the unbalancing.If a person is entitled they are not fair.Corruption is about someone believing they have a right to more.I wonder what would make this truth more apparent to people.Simple things like why do women have to shave?Why do women pay more at the dry cleaner or hairdresser to get services when a male pays less for the same services?Sine rape is so prevalent why isn't it being reported?Mythology becomes action.How do we change the mythology before it destroys our way of life.I am not trying to man bash etc.We all live or die here together.And in the end no one gets off this planet alive*S*

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 03:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmazonWoman1 (Post 760642)
Mythology becomes action.How do we change the mythology before it destroys our way of life.I am not trying to man bash etc.We all live or die here together.And in the end no one gets off this planet alive*S*

Excellent post! :goodscore:

Mythology is action.

I'm not male/masculine/gender bashing either. It's what our society has deemed as masculine/powerful/acceptable that's the problem.

Great thread!

Ginger 03-03-2013 03:49 PM

I think whether we like it or not, the application of "masculine" and "feminine" dynamics is going to creep into eco-topics of discussion.

That said, I've been lectured by friends in academia on the evils of "essentialism," and I "get" how uncool it is to stereotype around gender.

On the other hand, in the context of environmentalism, if, for example, there is a male-dominated industry doing the damage, it's hard not to attribute some kind of male energy (and class dominance!) as being part of the equation.

(Good grief I'm all over the place...)

That said, obviously like others have said, the movement to clean up and protect the earth is a movement comprised of people from all walks of life and identifications, though damage to the earth affects men and women differently overall, if you look at the demographics of who is affected by failing economies.

Of course eventually, everyone will be affected by a dying earth, some just sooner than others.

I work on the same floor as a sustainability team, four men and two women, and I respect them each individually and as a unit and they all care deeply about our impact on the environment. They also strike me as a group not affected the toxins of sexism that make my environment a place where I have to tread cautiously and often keep my opinions to myself, so as to not set off hostile, sexist comments and other ugly behaviors.

On a related note, personally it always bugged me when people talked of "mother" earth (Alice Walker included), but it's human nature to personify things so we can understand them.

Gender is a valid facet of the environmental discussion, though it helps me personally to feel more hopeful when I think about and hear of the little practical things people can do to keep the planet healthier.

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IslandScout (Post 760681)
On a related note, personally it always bugged me when people talked of "mother" earth (Alice Walker included), but it's human nature to personify things so we can understand them.

Love this statement, so true.

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 04:11 PM

I know I'm going to step on some toes when I say this, so I apologize in advance.

It seems that it is masculine-centered norms that are destroying our earth, not to the exclusion of the feminine participating in that destruction, but I think by far, it's masculine-dominant thinking, as our society has defined it, that contributes the most to how we live.

So, how do we (especially as lesbians/Trans/Queer/Non-bio male) address a straight white bio-male dominated societal mentality?

1) I try to look at what we can personally do first, and that illuminates to me to focus on raising boys. Mothers in our society help to form the very disgusting gender-bashing and idea that males are the entitled sex and deserve different/biased treatment. I see it all the time in parent/child dynamics.

2) I think we have to get bolder in our (the GLTB community) views and work through action.

3) For God's sake, VOTE!

This is where I get stumped and would love to hear what others have to say.

Ginger 03-03-2013 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by meridiantoo (Post 760702)
I know I'm going to step on some toes when I say this, so I apologize in advance.

It seems that it is masculine-centered norms that are destroying our earth, not to the exclusion of the feminine participating in that destruction, but I think by far, it's masculine-dominant thinking, as our society has defined it, that contributes the most to how we live.

So, how do we (especially as lesbians/Trans/Queer/Non-bio male) address a straight white bio-male dominated societal mentality?

1) I try to look at what we can personally do first, and that illuminates to me to focus on raising boys. Mothers in our society help to form the very disgusting gender-bashing and idea that males are the entitled sex and deserve different/biased treatment. I see it all the time in parent/child dynamics.

2) I think we have to get bolder in our (the GLTB community) views and work through action.

3) For God's sake, VOTE!

This is where I get stumped and would love to hear what others have to say.

Well I'm not a mom and I had a really hard time being a stepmom (my partner didn't want me to use that word, but I don't know what else to call it except I was that lady that lived in the house for a while).

So my views on raising boys are based on 1) my own miserable experience of living with a boy for over two years; and 2) my observations of lesbian moms—I'm thinking of five women whose homes I've been in and whose kids I've met.

I'm mulling over whether they raised entitled brats or responsible non-sexist men.

But you know what, the mom is not the only factor in how a kid turns out, powerful as moms are. Society and culture and peers and the economy and DNA are such huge factors in a kid's development. The mom does her best, is a huge, huge influence—but the kid also lives in a big world outside the family.

You're right, we can do our best to raise nice humans. But we're not totally to "blame" if they don't turn out that way, IMO.

(Said the non-parenting femme, who was a miserable failure as a "stepmom.")

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IslandScout (Post 760717)
Well I'm not a mom and I had a really hard time being a stepmom (my partner didn't want me to use that word, but I don't know what else to call it except I was that lady that lived in the house for a while).

So my views on raising boys are based on 1) my own miserable experience of living with a boy for over two years; and 2) my observations of lesbian moms—I'm thinking of five women whose homes I've been in and whose kids I've met.

I'm mulling over whether they raised entitled brats or responsible non-sexist men.

But you know what, the mom is not the whole equation. Society and culture and peers and the economy and their own DNA is such a huge factor in a kid's development. The mom does her best, is a huge, huge influence—but the kid also lives in a big world outside the family.

You're right, we can do our best to raise nice humans. But we're not totally to "blame" if they don't turn out that way, IMO.

(Said the non-parenting femme, who was a miserable failure as a "stepmom.")


Well said.

I don't mean to imply it's all on the mom, but I think parents have to start there, where the mythology begins to form. I did make that statement biased toward those who identify as female/feminine, and I apologize. Fathers are just as needed/responsible and capable. And it takes a village to raise a child - so many influences and factors that contribute. But, I think parents have the most impact.

I see a trend with the Baby-Boomer generation that will dissolve as that group passes out of the "changers and money-makers" realm - the mentality that the father is bread-winner and the strong sex and the woman is the stay-at-home domestic goddess where she belongs. People now raise their daughters to be strong, independent, smart, and make good choices that affect their futures. This was not always so. But, no one seems to focus on the boys, other than to teach them to be a responsible, productive member of society as well as the usuals (protect and never hit women, women are the weaker of the of two sexes). I think the newer generations will see a more balanced view between the sexes just as they are more accepting of the GLTB community.

Just as an aside, if your partner did not even recognize you as a step-parent in the relationship (this is me speaking with no knowledge of your relationship nor any of the parameters) then it stands to reason that you would fail as a step-parent. You were set-up to fail. You cannot be an effective parent where the other parent/partner devalues your role, mirrors to the child that you are just a temporary, non-parental fixture, and I hope that you don't judge yourself so harshly for that. I've dated 2 women long-term with children (I do not have children of my own). I understand, or at least think I do, many of the facets of this, but I still think, in the end, if you are not given shared responsibility and parental role authority in the relationship, then you will not be anything other than "the current one my parent sleeps with". This is fine for some and best for temporary, passing relationships. This is a whole other topic and thread, but I wanted to say this to you because I struggled with feeling like a failure also until I understood better what was really happening.

Arwen 03-03-2013 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IslandScout (Post 760681)
On a related note, personally it always bugged me when people talked of "mother" earth (Alice Walker included), but it's human nature to personify things so we can understand them.


Mother Earth, for me, is a living, breathing entity. She is part of my spiritual beliefs. Why would it bug you for someone to speak of their Deity?

Or do you not factor that in? I believe that is how Alice Walker uses the term as well. For me, Mother Earth is Gaia. Gaia is one of the many names of the Goddess. I also hold to the GreenMan as the living embodiment of the forest. He is the masculine soul.

But to the original poster (op)'s comment, I flat out do not think it is a feminine or a masculine problem. I think (and I know this will be twitchy for some) that it is the attitude of stewardship that some religions teach. That of humans being somehow superior and therefore "in charge" of nature.

We should, in my opinion, live in a partnership with nature not an attitude of ownership.

Can small things make a change? Yes. And, for me, they are far better than big splashy things. My turning off the water when I brush my teeth or wash my hands is a, you should pardon the pun, drop in the bucket, but it counts. More than that, it adds up.

I may not be able to do the twice a year "clean up the river" patrols, but by the Gods I can and do conserve the water I can touch.

I also recycle as much as possible.

YMMV of course. Each person can only do what they are called, moved to do. And that is the right thing for them.

Gender, for me, has no place in this discussion. Religion, though...religion certainly does. :D

By the way, I am in no way angry at IslandScout (I assume she knows that but will caveat this in case since we are still under a Mercury Retrograde.)

meridiantoo 03-03-2013 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arwen (Post 760734)

Mother Earth, for me, is a living, breathing entity. She is part of my spiritual beliefs. Why would it bug you for someone to speak of their Deity?

Or do you not factor that in? I believe that is how Alice Walker uses the term as well. For me, Mother Earth is Gaia. Gaia is one of the many names of the Goddess. I also hold to the GreenMan as the living embodiment of the forest. He is the masculine soul.

But to the original poster (op)'s comment, I flat out do not think it is a feminine or a masculine problem. I think (and I know this will be twitchy for some) that it is the attitude of stewardship that some religions teach. That of humans being somehow superior and therefore "in charge" of nature.

We should, in my opinion, live in a partnership with nature not an attitude of ownership.

Can small things make a change? Yes. And, for me, they are far better than big splashy things. My turning off the water when I brush my teeth or wash my hands is a, you should pardon the pun, drop in the bucket, but it counts. More than that, it adds up.

I may not be able to do the twice a year "clean up the river" patrols, but by the Gods I can and do conserve the water I can touch.

I also recycle as much as possible.

YMMV of course. Each person can only do what they are called, moved to do. And that is the right thing for them.

Gender, for me, has no place in this discussion. Religion, though...religion certainly does. :D

By the way, I am in no way angry at IslandScout (I assume she knows that but will caveat this in case since we are still under a Mercury Retrograde.)

Love this post, Arwen!

The concept of stewardship is something I never considered, but I think exactly what we are talking about. Thank you for that perspective.

I think what we do on a personal level makes a huge difference, especially when combined with the same/similar actions of others.


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:47 AM.

ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018