[Arwen]

Originally Posted by Puplove

To me femme is who I am - more than a gender, it is an orientation that transcends queer. Is femme defined by being the counterpart to butch? I think in some ways it does, the same way lesbian defines as being the match for another lesbian...??? But it means much more than that - it is an awareness of self, a strength, an existence that is much more powerful than being a female because I earned my place by working toward, growing into and proudly taking ownership of the mix of loving butch, being girly and being strong and capable all at once. And femme does not necessarily include "girly" because the power and strength of femme is defining who you are by what is right for you. And being loved and appreciated for it. And it could mean owning the proud title hooker.

Comprenez-vous? Le hee hee hee

You hit on something I was thinking about on my drive home.

Am I femme because I am attracted to butch energy.

And my end thought was no/yes. No, I am not femme simply because I am attracted to butches. Yes, I am femme because butches just do it for me. But I would still be femme even if there were no butches in the world.

I'd just be lonelier, but still femme. I would not change who I am.