Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post - What men say about women when they don't know you've lived as a woman

AishasWrath · 11-18-2015, 09:54 PM

A lot of men who say these things don't mean it in earnest. Most of the time it's an off-color expression of frustration and a way to desensitize to the awful things in the world, not actual disrespect or misogyny. I've said rude things in private about people I'm angry at, and rude words for various attributes of theirs have been deployed in those moments. It doesn't mean I hate their entire nationality or race or sex.

There are some men who say misogynist things and mean it, but in general nobody thinks highly of them except for their own kind.

That was a conundrum I ran into when living as male, the dual expectation that I imitate that and be punished for it. I had plenty of male friends before and very few of them behaved in the way people expected me to. I started to because I had to, I wasn't in a position to argue or bargain when it was contingent on getting HRT. I overdid it like I was expected to. Nobody liked it. Everyone wanted me to chill out and stop acting like a tool.

Then I overdid it in the opposite direction, and ran into some actual tools who capitalized on my unwillingness to behave as one. I then took some time to re-evaluate life and decided I had to be capable of out-tooling the tools without becoming one. I do it for exercise now and then, in places designated for the performance of toolishness, so if and when the enemy come a-knocking I'll be ready and unintimidated.

11-18-2015, 09:54 PM	#28
AishasWrath Junior Member How Do You Identify?: It's complicated/stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: they/them Relationship Status: godspouse Join Date: Nov 2015 Location: USA Posts: 18 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5 Thanked 31 Times in 12 Posts Rep Power: 10	A lot of men who say these things don't mean it in earnest. Most of the time it's an off-color expression of frustration and a way to desensitize to the awful things in the world, not actual disrespect or misogyny. I've said rude things in private about people I'm angry at, and rude words for various attributes of theirs have been deployed in those moments. It doesn't mean I hate their entire nationality or race or sex. There are some men who say misogynist things and mean it, but in general nobody thinks highly of them except for their own kind. That was a conundrum I ran into when living as male, the dual expectation that I imitate that and be punished for it. I had plenty of male friends before and very few of them behaved in the way people expected me to. I started to because I had to, I wasn't in a position to argue or bargain when it was contingent on getting HRT. I overdid it like I was expected to. Nobody liked it. Everyone wanted me to chill out and stop acting like a tool. Then I overdid it in the opposite direction, and ran into some actual tools who capitalized on my unwillingness to behave as one. I then took some time to re-evaluate life and decided I had to be capable of out-tooling the tools without becoming one. I do it for exercise now and then, in places designated for the performance of toolishness, so if and when the enemy come a-knocking I'll be ready and unintimidated.