I think this post/question is very thoughtful in terms of how socially entwined our views on gender and equating male to be strong and female to being weak. I understand this as a submissive guy. Certain people equate submissive bottom as weak or less than guy. This is not true.
My entire life experience has been just this. I was born submissive. It shows up all over the way i have lived my life professionally and emotionally. I spent some years of my life denying this because of trust issues, not this issue,but have discussed it intensely in therapy. I mean i am well aware and experienced that there are butches/guys/femmes out there that see me as a freak and think i should maybe man it up. I do not prescribe to this kind of thinking.
I love it when my Ms's masculine energy takes over. It is a dynamic not an identifier. She is no less Femme to me. From my knees perspective I quietly see a difference in how this energy is recognized from this community to my offline community experiences.
Quote:
Originally Posted by June
I am going to give an example, but not use the persons name, it's someone I really value and I hope she will forgive me for sharing this story, if she even remembers it!
Several years ago, she and I met in person and I asked which pronouns she preferred, she said she/her. Then one day, after that, I referred to her as "She" in a thread and she messaged me and said (not an exact quote) "Way to call me she". I was kind of stunned by that, but changed the way I referred to...him.
Now, what is that about? What makes it okay to use female pronouns in person and male online? What is it *we* do that makes it not okay to be a "she". How does it negate or lessen someones Butch Cred? It doesn't for me, but I'm not Butch. (But I am "Butch Enough")  |