[Liam]

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

Liam,

I do not know how to not to trust people. I trust everyone. Then when I get burned, I know what you mean. Otherwise the answer is no.

Now I try to be a forgiving man, and try to practice my faith. I try to always turn to my other cheek, and to always embrace everyone. No matter who or what they are. They are people and they require love above all things.

Andrew

I understand what you mean, Andrew, with the exception of a bump with my dentist, when I was four, I have pretty much always assumed people are kind and honest. However, my online experience has changed that, and I have learned not to be invested in people being honest, kind or even fair.

Originally Posted by violaine

dear liam,

in a word- yes.

when i was a small child, and my family mentioned someone 'stealing' me, i'd say, 'don't worry, they'll bring me back in ten minutes!' do you think that i must have repeated what i overheard?



acceptance is beautiful to know, and to be able to provide others. if an individual is wired to be naturally open, and then grows up with a lot of freedom to 'be', how does she know that not everyone else out there receives the same wiring/familial experiences?

it took me a long time to figure out!


ways i learned to be more guarded around certain people fairly straightforward: i feel worse around them than i do otherwise, and more adds up in the negative column. sure, there are people [NT's], capable of detecting things sooner- and that's ohk! seeing roundly, i.e., often for me means taking the long road- with friend/co-worker/person of interest/family member, and while it's true, i may eventually be out of a friendship [that * i * thought existed], better to be out than remain stuck in one-sidedness.

on the other hand, a break just may be needed. it depends on the person, situation, and whether or not my bounce-back has been exhausted!

perils. pleasures. of AT wiring.

eta: it 'feels' worse being around them. emotionalising the patterns of undesirable behaviour. this happens after trying to make sense of the confusion, and then communicating questionable scenarios- intellectualising first and then going on how that is received. patterns and connections. it comes in stages- not all at once, like it may work for NT's.

Why on earth would anyone want to return you in ten minutes, Belle? That is a wonderful story of how we repeat what we hear, when we are kids.

Feelings, are so tricky, I don't think many NT folks understand how foreign they are, to many of us on the spectrum. It took a long time for me to understand what a stomach ache can mean for me. I've come to recognise that this means something is terribly off and it is not good. This unfamiliarity with feelings is definitely a two-edged sword, however I am grateful I am how I am.