I had an assignment due tonight, so I went to the library after class. It was very busy, but I found one spot left near the back in between two guys. I named the young man sitting to my left "Indigestion" and we'll just call the gentleman on my right "Heavy Breather." The reasons for the nicknames will become clear in a moment.
When I logged on to the terminal, I was surprised to see that apparently a woman had left in quite a hurry. She was clearly gone (I asked to be sure), but she was still logged in and there were documents still open the desktop. According to her login, her name was Rebecca.
It didn't take long to figure out why young Rebecca fled so quickly.
Indigestion started
repeatedly honking his nose instead of blowing it. And it was
loud. And oh, the belching! He belched and honked a symphony of not-so-sweet nothings right into my ear. I could practically taste his dinner. It was unbelievably loud and it was positively the most revolting thing I have ever been subjected to in public. Oh, the acoustics!
Not to be outdone, Heavy Breather was apparently very excited by all of this. Indigestion just kept chomping on chips. This was not ordinary belching; when you are belching like this, it's time to stop eating for a little bit.
Now, I know when I write I often use hyperbole to underscore my point (and to entertain), but this time I have understated the events that took place in that library this evening. The entire facility was abuzz about it. I still cannot quite accept that it wasn't one of those secret practical joke shows, lol.
My stomach is literally still turning just recalling it.
