[imperfect_cupcake]

hmn. I've never had it in the romantic sense. No wait. That's wrong. I love my exwife. I care that she is ok. I wish she is happy. And I like to know she's doing ok. But I find her irritating, irresponsible, gets on my very last nerve, drives me batshit, and I wish she would get her shit together. I also can't truly forgive what she did. I don't mind being in light contact with her on occasion in fb, but I don't want to hang out with her, I don't want her interfering with my shit, but I do love her.

Love as an emotion on its own doesn't mean much. I have been absurd by people who loved me. Sincerely and definitely felt that emotions of love for me. It's someone's personality and functioning that matter. Emptions are just emotions. There is nothing wrong with anger. It's an emotion. It tells us something is wrong. It's how we use it, cope with it, and function with it. Love is no different.

Emotions are just feelings. They don't do things, they only occur. People enact emotions and those enactments matter. Not the emotions themselves.

ASo fucking what if someone loves me. Do they hit me? Do they lie? Are they a drunk? It makes about as much difference for someone who loves me and never acts on it as it doesn't for someone who loves me and never acts on it by neglecting me.

Someone could love you very much and it doesn't matter because you don't know, they don't interact with you and they keep their distance. Someone could love you and sexually assault you. Values and enactment is what matter. Emotions just are.

Signed
A complete pragmatist