[Gemme]

Originally Posted by kittygrrl

Everyone's ideas about unconditional love are appreciated but I have to say while you may believe you love someone unconditionally until they do something to cross the line, then it is not unconditional at all but very conditional. It may come as a rude awakening that you did not love them as much as you thought you did because you never believed they would ever cross your boundary but, as long as you have a boundary it's not unconditional. However, I think we are capable of loving someone very much and yet if they cross a boundary -infidelity, abuse, murder then we find we love less or not at all-this has nothing to do with unconditional love-

Building off of what you said....

If someone betrays your trust it has nothing to do with you not loving them 'as much as you thought you did'. A betrayal is devastating and there are deep and long-lasting effects from it but it says nothing about the person betrayed and everything about the person who committed the act.

I think, as humans, we should extend certain courtesies to one another: honesty, loyalty and integrity in all we do with or for them. If we do not exhibit these traits, it's not on the other person or a judgement of their love, but falls solely on the perpetrator of the betrayal.

I believe that love should have conditions such as the boundaries you mentioned. Having personal boundaries is a way we protect and honor and love ourselves. If we cannot love ourselves enough to do that, we surely cannot love anyone else in a healthy and realistic way.