Quote:
Originally Posted by Toughy
I'm just kind of curious about something. A couple of femmes have used 'he' and 'him' when talking about what they might do for butches who come to visit. Since, at least for the most part, 'he' is not the default pronoun for butch folk on this site, I have a question.
Does the use of 'he' in your posts mean you are talking about a transman and/or a male id'd butch? I have to assume that, because you certainly can't be talking about what you would do for a butch woman while using male pronouns. I must also assume you don't date butch women. If butch women are also in your realm of dating, you might try s/he as an inclusive way to use pronouns.
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...or you might use he... or she... depending on how your own personal construct theory runs.
I certainly use "he" for all butches... if they tell me that they prefer "she" I will use the title out of courtesy, but to me butch is "he", femme "she". This has held true for all of the butches and transguys I've known/dated, including those that identified as women. And in the case of the female identified butches I've known/dated, they understood and were comfortable with the fact that the "he" pronoun to me, and to them themselves in their interactions with me, honoured their butchness rather than their feminity.
Also not sure that we can assume that we know what the default pronoun is for all of the butches on this site.
Each to their own, diversity does make the world go round.
Cheers,
Ms V