[Kobi]

QUOTE=Medusa;116167]Responding in a darker red this time



Medusa,


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I can understand mixed group and how that can be awesome. I dont understand how you can say this is a home for my identity if I had to ask where my zone was, cuz your choices for me didnt fit my identity. The mere fact I had to ask should have been the first clue.

I see what you are saying but I didnt understand why you asked where your zone was when I feel like this entire website is a zone for lesbians. This is a Queer website encompassing all of the spectrum and ways of being Queer. Lesbian fits there with equal and accessible space.


I think where you and I are misunderstanding each other is that I personally do not define "Lesbian" as a gender identity. I *do* define Butch and Femme as a gender identity. Hence, the Zones for each *gender* identity to commune with one another.
If you identify as a Butch Lesbian or a Femme Lesbian, one of those Zones should work for you. See what I'm saying?
I see exactly what you are saying. You are saying I must fit my identity into what you predetermined were my choices based on your perception of what my choices should be. After all, a butch is a butch is a butch. That is sexist, homophobic and misandriatic.


I do not see a lot of visible lesbians here. Perhaps they choose go in areas or participate in threads I dont read.

Oooh, look harder! There are a lot of Lesbian-identified Butches and Femmes here. I do think that a lot of people on this site define "Lesbian" as a political identity and not a gender identity. Not all, mind you, but at least several people that I have talked to and seen write about it at length. If you want to see visible Lesbians, look at anything that I write, or anything that anyone else who identifies in any way as a Lesbian writes.
I don't necessarily identify as a Lesbian first or even in the same way as you; it's not my gender identity but I do embrace some of the politics that make up "Lesbian" as I see it.

I dont see many visible lesbians. I will look harder but I see a reluctance of lesbians to come forth.
I dont know what a transperson identifying as lesbian means. Does this mean biological males trans to females?

It can but it can also mean that a Female who has transitioned to Male who is now known as a Transman has chosen to hang on to their identity as a Lesbian.
A transman who transition only to retain his identity as a lesbian? Doesnt that defeat the purpose of transitioning?

And I mean when lesbian referred to women having the right to be visible in loving other women. It was a time when lesbian presupposed a gender of female. I never remember a gender issue except when it came to a male patriarchy and how it affects women and women as lesbians.

I think that in most cases, "Lesbian" still does presuppose a gender of female. If in most cases, lesbian still presupposes a gender of female, why are you trying to tell me to fit myself into a femme, butch or trans or queer gender? That doesnt make sense.

And it meant a space where women developed themselves as women and as lesbians within a male oriented, patriarchal society.

That happens here. Women develop themselves as women. Women develop themselves as Butches, Femmes, and sometimes Trans people.
Agreed, all persons at any given time are works in progress.

I have a real hard time embracing that which continues to oppress me. Does that mean I dont think some of the males/male id's are not ok people? Of course not. Does that mean some impress me as priveleged, macho shitheads.....yeah.
I think it is great that I can say yea, I have a mistrust of things male and I have a dang good reason for it.

This might be the root of it. The mistrust of "all things male" can and does translate into a mistrust of all things Trans and all things male-identified. It summarily categorizes as "male" people who are often NOT summarily male and who most definitely do not have a summarily male experience.

You misunderstood me. I am not addressing the experience a male summarily might have or not. I am addressing how male privelege, whether is is appreciated or not, is a given. Sexism and misogyny can not be ignored whether it comes from a male perspective or a female perspective.
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Try this on....if someone told you that we had to deconstruct femme because it is sexist and separatist and we must find a male counterpart to it and integrate it into our community would that detract from being a femme?

I don't think it would detract from Femme. At least not mine. I don't see how identifying as Femme could ever be sexist since it is the very heart of embracing the feminine and Queering it up in fucking amazing ways. If someone asked me to find a male counterpart to it, I would be at a loss since Femme doesn't need anything male to exist. It's a standalone identity. Even if it fucks other women. Even if it fucks men.

You misunderstood. I said we deconstruct femme. Femme doesnt exist anymore. There is no femme as the very heart of feminine. Gone. Poof. Doesnt exist.
We need to reconceptualize the entire thing and add a masculine/male component in order to recognize your male counterpart. It is no longer the heart of feminine, it is a merge of female/male. YOU as a gender cease to exist, replaced with something more acceptable to a broader group of ids.

Femme doesnt need anything male to exist? And here I thought someone might see me as a separatist. But lesbian needs something male to exist?Whats good for the goose is good for the gander yes?
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