Quote:
Originally Posted by girl_dee
We are all evolving.
i feel how stone or not stone we may also depend on our sexual counterpart. It can be very difficult as a femme to know what is allowed and what is not allowed when with a butch. It’s a learning process. Just because they allow something doesn’t mean i am into it, but i could be. i am not good at figuring it out so it’s easier to just ask questions. I think there is a stigma among the butch community that if they are not stone, they are somehow less butch. Nothing could be further than the truth in my eyes.
If my butch is stone, would that not make me stone too? That feels so very limiting to me, but that is probably because i am not a stone femme.
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There are people who identify as Stone and this dictates their behavior (what they do or do not do, what they allow or do not allow). And then there are people who respect their Stone partners boundaries, and are not Stone, themselves. It sounds like you respect your partner's boundaries and are not Stone. You are adjusting according to your partners boundaries, you are not being more of less stone based on their boundaries. Who we partner with does not determine our identity.
I have always preferred to date queer femmes who identify as Stone. I don't want a woman who is limiting her desires in order to be with me. I want her desires to match my desires.