[GeorgiaMa'am]

Kind of blue. My sister and I decided to sell Mom's house as is, after we take a few things out of it that we want. It's really kind of depressing to decide which things I want. But at least we don't have to go through the whole estate sale/Goodwill/take things to the dump rigamarole. My Mom is a neat freak, but also a hoarder. At least everything has a place and it's all put away. There's no clutter. Her house is neater than mine could ever hope to be. It's pretty close to looking professionally staged for sale. Unfortunately, it's also tragically 1980s in décor.

My Sister and I agreed that the easiest thing to do, in order to avoid ending up with more clutter in our own houses, is to make lists in advance of the things we want. Then when we go to the house we should pretty much try to stick to the lists. Other than some gifts I gave my Mom and my Dad, and a few mid-century modern pieces, I don't really want much of anything. I plan to go through the Christmas ornaments for things that we handmade.

Our Mom has most of the photos with her at my Sister's house, where she now lives. My Sister and I thought about just leaving the house intact, so our Mom could visit when she wanted to, but Mom has no interest. The last few times she has been there, she just wanders around and asks my Sister who the people in the photos are. She acts like it's someplace that she thinks ought to be familiar to her, but she can't quite remember ever being there. Also, we just had to pay the taxes and insurance on the place and we really just can't afford to keep it empty.

Thank goodness this is not the house where I grew up, or I'd be a basket case. Mom and Dad retired to this house after my Sister and I left home. And thank Goddess we are not waiting until Mom passes away to do this. I think it is the saddest thing to have to pack up somebody's possessions after they die. It's sad enough as it is; with her dementia, it's like Mom is passing away slowly, a little bit more every day.