[Soft*Silver]

I do like being single. This is a new thing for me. I use to like being in relationships. Alot of things have happened in the last 5 years that have settled me down and wisened me up. About myself. You know a break up was worth it when you learn what you need to know about yourself. I am a good student....

and what I learned is I really dont want to relinquish control over to someone else. I dont want to have to answer to anyone or have to ask anyone
"may I?". I have been told there are people out there who wouldnt take control nor expect me to ask "may I?" but seriously, thats a myth. If you are in a relationship, out of courtesy of the other person, you really should confer with the other person about the actions of your life. And if you are with someone, you do have to relinquish some control. I simply dont want that anymore.

I would love to be in love again someday but I dont know how that would look anymore. I use to want to live with my partner but I cant imagine that at all now! I lost my family farm after one relationship ended and floated to other people's homes, only to lose my sense of "home" all over again when I had to leave when the relationship ended. I own my own home now, free and clear. I wont be leaving it ever.

I would love to date someone forever tho. You know the type of gal I am...in movies, I am the widow down the road who has been keeping company with the old farmer who was never married. I make him dinner a couple nights a week. He tills my garden for me (oh yeah! snickering) and I bake him pies. He shows up in the evening of holidays with a small present. I give him something I made, or a flannel shirt or a carhart hat. People know we see each other but no fuss is made and its kept between him and I.

Thats what I see myself in someday...