Quote:
Originally Posted by julieisafemme
SuperFemme thank you so much for starting this thread! It is an excellent conversation.
Adorable I wanted to speak to the things I bolded above. I am mentally ill. My partner does not like it when I label myself such. I find it empowering and a way to destigmatize it for me. I have OCD. I've had it since I was a kid. I had no clue what was wrong with me. I just thought I was bad. I was very good at white knuckling my way through life but I still had problems coping and navigating the world. I did hit a bottom and because of the nature of my illness I was able to have the self-awareness to change. I had to make a choice and I did. It was very hard.
Being mentally ill can create a whole host of coping mechanisms or strategies to navigate the world. These are separate from the disease. They do not go away when you take medication or get therapy! I have had to relearn so many things. Every day I get better at things.
It has been an adjustment for my family and friends as well. They have a much better understanding of where I was and what I was doing all those years. There were times in my life where I did not have clarity into my behavior and was not capable of making choices.
I consider myself in recovery from a chronic condition. I do have to make the choice every day to take my meds and work my therapy. I could choose to do neither.
I don't know that my family or friends give me a pass per se. I think they do understand so much better that there are some things that I can't do or do very well. I really appreciate their understanding and accomodation of those things. But I still have to do the work.
So for myself I would have to say strongly and emphatically that there is a choice with mental illness.
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Julieisafemme,
What a great post. I think that the people around us have a unique position that most others do not. Especially in an online venue.
My family (i'm a mom with three, now four kids) they were kind of freaked out by the me that came home from the hospital. I can honestly say that I am a completely different person now. They had to grieve just like I did, and that is not an easy concept (grieving the living) for kids.
My father did not believe in brain injury. Until he fell in the driveway and ended up with two brain surgeries and a brain injury. (the universe is funny like that). Today he understands because it is his reality.
So my family knows me in ways that nobody else ever will, and as loved ones that passes that we give each other are always on a different level than what anyone else would do.
I know that you do have to make choices every day. So do I. I have to take meds. I have to work hard to have a "day". It is a choice.
I hate mail. I get overwhelmed and cry. I have gone months without opening my mail. I do NOT get a pass. My lights get shut off, my gas, my cable, my phone...because that is the consequence of not opening my mail.
Still, I am choosing not to do it when I don't.
Thanks for sharing. So much.
